Breakup Helpline [#2 of the Helpline Trilogy]

1:12 p.m

"Did you told my friend Damien that I was seeking flirting advice from you?"

"Um, look- I thought it was you who picked up so I might've accidentally said something..."

"Serena! Now he's making fun of me about it- he even joked about setting up a profile for me in those old people dating websites."

"Oh please, I have way better advice than that. Dating websites are for married people over, like, forty."

"Married people? What kind of fucked up childhood you had?"

"Well, my dad did cheat on my mom with a woman half his age and ran out on us when I was three."

"Oh...shit, sorry."

"It's fine. I think he's an ass too."

"Jeez, is that why you're so mean?"

"I'm mean because people are mean. Now shut up and let's talk about you."

"Nah, it's- it's okay. I haven't think about Tiffany...in a long time. Let's talk about you. You really never been in a relationship? Like no experience at all?"

"Well, I've kissed a boy in seventh grade. But that turned out to be a ten dollar bet from those asshole jocks. And I made out with some people but it's like spin-the-bottle and truth-or-dare kind of stuff. Then in ninth grade..."

"What happened?"

"Well, I liked this boy."

"So you had feelings."

"But it wasn't like it was real- that boy asked me out and I said yes-"

"So you were in a relationship! Ha!"

"Yeah, but it was all fake because guess what the guy suffered three months with me in order to get laid. Once I lost my virginity to him, he was like 'well, we're done'. So it didn't count. It was just, like, a race with his friends to see who could bump uglies first. I was young, stupid, naive and idealistic. That when I realized- love doesn't exist because my dad broke my mom's heart and people are really fucking shitty."

"Wow...geez, I'm sorry. Guy sounds like a douchebag."

"Yeah, he sucked in bed too."

"Really, in all seriousness, you didn't deserve to be treated like that."

"It's fine."

"But it's not."

"Yeah, it's not but you don't see me crying and moping around with buckets of tissues and ice cream because I suck it up and deal with it. Life screws everybody-that's how life works and you can choose either to sob about it or take it like a man."

"Deep."

"Balls deep."

"And it's back to that again."

"Oh please, Franklin. It's me. You should've expected that."

______

be sure to vote, comment and check out some of my other works if you can :)