Invisible

GUILTY

JACK’S TRUCK PULLS INTO THE DRIVEWAY, Aiden, Jack, and Ethan jumping out. Aiden bursts through the front door, straight through the living room, and outside onto the back porch. Ethan and Jack follow only into the living room, their faces exhausted. Anna and I walk down the stairs, pajamas already on. It’s about three in the morning, my eyes barely staying open.

“What’s going on?” I ask, “Why’d Aiden take so long.”

“Well…” Jack trails off, stares at me, “he was arrested.”

My eyes bust wide open, wide awake. “What?”

“He was arrested for assault… Which was pretty stupid.”

“How… why?”

“Well… I mean, I understand the case… but it was still stupid considering the situation. See, he—”

“Long story short,” Ethan interrupts, “Aiden beat Jeremy’s ass to a pulp.” He rolls his eyes, glares at Jack. “She didn’t need to know everything. Hell, I got bored while you were bailing him out.”

Jack sits on the sofa, gives up the fight.

“What do you mean to a pulp?”

“Well, he put him in an intensive care unit. Lucky ass. I would have seriously fucked him up if I’d gotten there… I’m sorry this happened to you.” His eyes grow serious, worrying. I nod.

“It’s not your fault,” I say as I make my way toward the backdoor, reach for the doorknob.

“Nuh uh,” Ethan says, “I wouldn’t go out there if I were you.”

“Well, I would, so…”

I open the door, step outside. Aiden is hunched over the railing, facing away from me.

“Leave me alone,” he says.

“Angry at me?” I ask, “Or someone else?”

He jumps, turns toward me. “No. I just thought you were…” He stares at me, eyes sympathetic, angry and ready to burst out. I can tell he wants to scream at me, rip the closest person apart.

“Are you okay?” I ask.

“What do you think?” he responds, turns away from me. I walk toward him, lean against the rail next to him.

“He,” Aiden whispers, “He was doing this to you the entire time, and I was such a fucking idiot, I—”

“You didn’t know—”

“The hell I didn’t!”

“Aiden, calm down.”

“No, I knew something was wrong with you. Hell, we all did. But what did I do?” He hesitates, stares at me as if he wants me to answer.

“Aiden, you kept asking me if everything was okay, and I lied every time”

“No, here’s what I did. You left, and I blew it off. I didn’t think to ask you about it, nor did I really care enough… and I wish I had, because then that asshole wouldn’t have ra…” he trails off, looks away.

“I wouldn’t have told you, no matter what you would have done.”

“And how do you know that if I didn’t try?”

I’m silent as I study his expression. Does he really think this is his fault?

I move closer toward him, my fingers tracing his spine the same way his do to me. He closes his eyes.

“This isn’t your fault,” I say.

“Yeah, well whose is it then?” His voice is sharper, and his eyes are focused on me, heartbroken and penetrated. The answer is simple, and I smirk, whisper the name.

“Mark.”

He’s silent, looks away from me again. I rest my head on his shoulder, my hand around his waist.

“It’s not your fault, Aid. I know it’s not, and I need you to feel the same way.”

“I can’t.”

“Try. For me.”

He sighs, making my stomach twist because he’s not relieved. He’s skeptical.

“No.”

I pull away from him, stare straight into his eyes.

“Please?”

He stands up straight, stares at me for a long moment. Then he walks toward the back door, tells me to come inside. I follow him, straight into the living room.

“Are you all staying here tonight?” he asks.

“Yeah,” Anna says, “Michelle’s sleeping in the guestroom.”

Aiden nods. “You guys can sleep in my room.”

“What about you?” I ask. He turns toward me.

“I don’t think I’m going to sleep tonight.”

I frown, and everyone leaves the living room, leaving Aiden and me alone.

<><><>

I wake up screaming, warm arms around me, Aiden’s voice whispering everything’s alright, everything’s okay.

I open my eyes, see my entire family around me. I gulp, quickly pull away from Aiden.

I saw Jeremy with Michelle.

I saw him with me.

I don’t want to see it again.

Ever.

“I’m sorry,” I say.

“Don’t even worry about it,” Ashlee says. Ali rubs my back, Ethan, Blake, and Jack migrating out of the room.

“You alright?” Ali asks.

“I guess,” I say. Aiden keeps staring at me, his eyes penetrating. I look away from him.

Blake and Jack come back with a glass of water, chips, and Ethan and Anna come with pillows.

“Sleepover,” he says, his voice high pitched. I laugh. “My least favorite thing. I guess it’s better with you around.” He nudges me on my arm, and I smile. Sooner or later, everyone seems happier.

But Aiden keeps glaring at me.