a forever type of love

phone calls

i spent the next few days still at rachel's. i remained at her house whilst she went to training or over to guros

it was nice to have some away time from the world but i realised i'd have to face reality sooner or later

my phone had been switched off for a couple of days now and i honestly couldn't bare seeing the notifications pop up

throughout the days whilst rachel was out, i practiced exercises to strengthen my leg and i was pretty much stable on it apart from the odd wobble

i took the free time i had to reflect on my words used during the argument with leah

the guilt consumed me but a part of me was glad i stood up for myself

it's not like i chose to be in a car crash

rachel got home from training the same time as she normally does and we spent the day together as usual

"as much as i love spending time with you al, you really have to go home and speak to your girlfriend" she said

"i wouldn't really call her my girlfriend anymore" i said, a pierce of my heart tearing as the words left my mouth

"oh shut up, you had an argument and now you're going to go home and fix it" she demanded

i knew it was the right thing to do but i wasn't ready to face her just yet

"you're right" i said

"i know i am. when am i not?" she joked

i giggled at her sarcasm before putting my stuff back in my bag

"thank you for letting me crash here rach" i said

"anytime" she said with a smile

we said our goodbyes and i walked to my car

i sat in my car on rachel's driveway and powered my phone back on

beth, viv, katie and leah had blown my phone up with messages and calls, none of them aware of my location

i dialed katie's number before i had the chance to open any messages

"alex oh thank god. you better have a fucking good explanation for disappearing off of the face of the earth for days" she screamed down the phone

"relax katie i'm fine" i said

"we've been worried sick alex, where the fuck are you?" she asked with an angry tone in her voice

"i crashed at rachel's for a few days, i just needed some time to think" i stood up for myself

after lots of screaming at me, she took a long pause and sighed

"but are you alright? like genuinely?" she asked sincerely

"yes katie i'm fine" i said

"have you spoken to leah yet?" she asked, a slight panic in her voice

"no you were the first person i called" i said

"as nice as that is, you need to call your fucking girlfriend now. she's in pieces mate" katie said, her voice gradually getting louder as she spoke

"i know, i know. can i come and see you please" i asked

"as long as you promise to call your girlfriend and let her know you're alive" she compromised

"yes okay fine" i said, eventually giving in

"i'm at home so just come whenever you're ready" she said

"thanks katie" i expressed "oh and also, can you not tell anyone that you've heard from me please. i don't want this thing being worse than it already is"

i crossed my fingers in hope katie would agree

after a deep breath from the other side of the phone she simply said "fine"

i ended the call and drove over to her house

as soon as she opened the door, she pulled me into the tightest hug i've ever had in my life

"don't you dare do that ever again, you hear me?" she said, her voice half stern, half relieved to see me

i replied with a nod before pulling away from her embrace

i sat myself down on her sofa, waiting for her to follow

"so what happened" she asked

as i explained the situation to her, i remained calm due to the long period of time i had to myself to consider both sides in the argument. i told her i acknowledged the fact i didn't consider leah's feelings and that i was an ignorant cunt

"definitely an ignorant cunt" the irishwoman said

i rolled my eyes at her before bursting into laughter

most of the time, i could never stay serious around katie but she was always there for me when i needed her, that's what i loved most about her

"have you called her yet?" she asked with one eyebrow raised

"shit er...i forgot" i hesitated

"you forgot to call your fucking girlfriend to tell her you were alive?" she said angrily

"please don't kill me" i panicked

"i'm not going to kill you, but she fucking will" katie said whilst grabbing my phone out of my hands and unlocked it

"katie no" i begged

she dialed leahs number and put it on loud speaker

the phone beeped once before leah picked up the phone

"alex?" she asked, a clear upset tone in her voice

she sniffled a few times, indicating that she had been crying

by hearing the sound of her voice, the anger and grudge i held against her washed away and was replaced by guilt and shame

"baby im so sorry" i said, sincerity filling my voice

"please come home" she begged in between breaths

"okay baby"

"please al" she asked

"i know baby, i'm on my way" i said softly before hanging up the phone

i took a deep breath as i realised all of the mistakes i had made over the past few days

"if you don't hurry up and go get your girl then i will" katie said with a smile forming on her face

"thank you katie, really" i said as i wrapped my arms around her

i said goodbye and rushed to my car as quickly as possible

on my way home, i picked up the biggest bouquet of red roses i could find along with her favourite chocolate

i know i can't buy her gifts as my way of saying sorry but i thought it would be a nice gesture

i rehearsed my speech i was going to give her as she opened the door as i drove back home

i really wanted to prove to her i was sorry and that it wouldn't happen again

i was stupid and selfish but everyone makes mistakes

i just hope she forgives me