When Royalties Clash | JJk ff

23

Y/N's pov:

Whenever a person is given two choices which can change the course of their lives and they end up choosing one, its human of them to think 'what would have happened if I chose the other option that day?'. I currently suffered from the same problem.

Out of all the possibilities of how we'd end up, this wasn't something I even considered.
Why? Because whenever a royalty became close with a commoner, a conflict rose.

Also because deep down I thought I would be giving myself a lot of importance in his eyes by thinking he'd want me to go with him, not while I didn't even know my place in his life.

I still don't. 

Our relationship doesn't have a name. So is it valid for me to question on what basis is he asking me to go with him? Is it even necessary to verbalize what we feel? Of course it is! What is wrong with you, Y/N? He isn't just any man but the emperor. So of course its necessary, for it won't only affect the both of you but the entire kingdom.
He didn't ask me to marry him.

Does he want me to become his....

"No!" I broke away from his embrace no matter how comforting it was. His feet wobbled a little at the sudden push. "I can't.." I whispered, more to myself.
"I can't come with you." This time my voice held a little weight rather than doubt.

It wasn't just the fraility of what we had but also the fact that I was scared of his title. Being in a forbidden relation with the king will make me a target of several accusations, assumptions and gossips. I'm just a village girl brought up with simplicity who doesn't have that strong-willed heart to handle the pressure of all that. And if its true that he wants me to become a mistress or a harlot for him, there isn't any space for doubt. I won't go with him.

His eyebrows crashed into a frown. "Why do you want me to come with you anyway?" Please! Clear this mist of doubt, say that you truly feel for me.
But why would he want to make me his wife when there are so many beautiful princesses out there waiting to be chosen by him?

His frown deepened, a tension slowly starting to build up around him. "I thought it was very clear." No, it wasn't. Upon not getting a reply from me, he sighed heavily. "Y/N, I just told you what I felt about you."

I was out of words. Saying 'yes' felt wrong but saying 'No' felt like the end of the world. I won't ever see him again if I chose the latter. But there was no hope for you the moment you found out his identity. We were just walking on eggshells on a path leading us nowhere.
The fog of infatuation was slowly settling down making the reality of the situation dawn on me again.
He is Royalty and I in no way am suppose to be around him.
He confided in my house for weeks.

So I will do what is morally right. "I'm sorry, Your Majesty. I can't go with you." I said, looking directly into his eyes with whatever courage was left in me. There was the slightest spark of displeasure on his face, a scowl. Before he could say something that would sway my resolve, I spoke. "And you shouldn't be here. The neighbours have seen you here, it can cause problems."

And we stood there staring at each other for what felt like hours with a growing tension that was choking me into suffocation.

He left.
He really left.
It would be hipocratic of me to feel sad or offended over this but that didn't make me feel any less sad. I at least expected him to put up a little fight.

I sighed for the nth time, realising I'm such a horrible person on the inside, not standing up and work hard for what I really want and then cry about it when I don't get it.