𝙏𝙄𝙍𝙀𝘿 𝙊𝙁 𝙈𝙀 / 𝗜𝗧★𝗖𝙃𝙄 𝗨𝗖𝗛𝗜𝙃𝘼 [SEMI-HIATUS/ ON HOLD]

vii.

AT SOME POINT in your life, you knew that loving was tiring at some point. But love was endless, whether it was unrequited or torture, love was still endless. An unconditional form of promise and torture at the same time.

Loving is a bit hard and complicated. Was what you said years ago. 5 years ago to be exact, at age 13. Aware of the torture and issues of the home you called 'parents', yet their love was artificial.

And right now, you could still say the same as you gazed at the Uchiha beside your hospital bed. You knew he was gazing at you as the others bid their farewells, giving enough space for what you guys are called comically, 'lovers'

But you weren't his lover, neither the person he loves the most. You were just a contract wife.

Yet somehow, you can't let go of the feelings. Call it dumb, pathetic, or even stupid, but not everybody copes with feelings the same way. Some were strong and some weren't.

And you were part of the lower ones.

a/n: oh and please if you're going to comment "oh em gee this isn't me, why are we always crying, b don't cry" and many more then I am asking kindly for you to leave. this story isn't for you. it was clear from the title that the story was already going to be angsty and full of trauma. people cope differently and this y/n has been dealing with trauma since she was young, you could clearly see that she's trying her best and she's strong in her own way. she's coping and trying to find herself and probably would be better in the later chapters. so leave if you don't like it. and plus do you know how misogynistic that sounds? if it's your favorite ale character you're going to say "my poor baby has been through so much! he doesn't deserve this" and when it's a female's turn, she's suddenly weak? please reconsider, i'm already asking kindly, thank you.

But significantly, as you bid farewell back, you pursed your lips in to a thin line once everyone was gone, contemplating whether you should start the conversation like you always do but surprisingly, Itachi beat you to it.

"Are you okay now?" Itachi calmly asked as you darted your gaze towards him, wondering if you were dreaming or hallucinating. It was never him to initiate a kind conversation, always giving you replies that were filled with venom and malice. An intention to drive someone away. Yet, even despite that, you continued to be kind. Like what you've always been taught too.

"Ah, yes Itachi-kun. How about you? How are you?" You asked him, as a friend and not as a lover because you just knew he will never view like that. The realization may hurt, but it teaches a few great lessons. 

You noticed his eyes widening as you timidly asked that question in a tone you'd use for a friend, not for a husband, not for a lover. And Itachi knew, right there and there, that he pushed you away too greatly, yet kept, now, a friendly distance. The distance you had before was something expected from a happy companion, though he knew you weren't happy at all with his coldness. Now...you were at a distance nothing similar from before. No more was the woman who happily greeted him everyday.

You were no longer the amorist he knew. Now that you was just fragment of his memory now. Just what exactly happened?

"Itachi-kun? Do you not wanna be here? You could go if you don't wanna stay here. Don't need to force yourself." You told him with a small, sad, smile albeit the cheery tone you used. Was he really that harsh to you before all of this? You were taking it a lot harsher than he had expected but he said nothing.  He was truly sorry. "Ah yes. I'm okay. Just thinking about stuff." He lowly mumbled, more like he was talking to himself more than you.

You're smile grew more sadder as you gazed at him softly with an aching heart. A thought came across as he said that. He probably was thinking of her, that was when you knew, even in the mess of your wife being in a hospital, being tortured by big nightmares and taunting voices, nothing could've changed his love for her.