Tie my heartstrings ❦

puppy eyes

Song: the perfect girl by mareux
This chapter has a -Warning-
❁❁❁
Hudson

I feel angry and impatient waiting on her all night. After my work had finished, I came home as soon as I could.  I couldn't waste a second without knowing if my girl was safe and sound at home. Not out with a bunch of drunk idiots trying to get with her.

I wanted Katie to go out and have fun, of course. To be able to enjoy herself without me there.

But that's If I knew I could trust her. She was so fragile, so perfect, and I knew I couldn't trust her without me there. I wanted her back with me the second she left.

So I had to check up on her myself. To make sure she was behaving okay. Just before I arrived at my apartment I made sure to stop where she was located.

I'm aware of how sick it sounds and wrong. But I'm crazily protective over what's mine. That being Katie Brown.

It's something when she gets her way with her puppy dog eyes. But when she isn't keeping the promise and ignores me, it only makes me furious. It makes me want to stop being so lenient and trusting, with her.

That's why I must resort to things I wish I didn't have to.

She knows how worried I get and how it pisses me off when she doesn't listen. In reality, it was just an excuse to feel her hands on me and have her in my lap all over again.

My control was hanging by a loose thread, and I would snap. Give into her. That little voice in my head, the one that was rough and ruthless, washed over me. I knew it would destroy her and break us, and I did the only thing I could.

I got mad at her. And I blamed the fact that it was her who made me feel this way. It was easier to hold on to the fact that she was behind all my mixed emotions for making me feel like I couldn't trust her.

A young temptress who awaits to seduce me, and it was working but only because she was conniving.
I indulged in the little temptress on impulse without considering all the reasons why I shouldn't. I couldn't.

I feel regret when I realize I'd dragged this young girl into something she didn't deserve to be dragged into.  My shit. But it was too late. She was In my possession now. My feelings were real. Even after she'd left and ignored my calls all night, I'd convinced myself that everything she did was to get a reaction out of me.

I blame the past experiences where I was lied to, used, and deceived. But I chose to trust again. In Katie. to believe she was different.

She made me possessive of her.
That was the reasoning behind what happened earlier today. When I saw her wanting to leave me and go out with some boy she'd met, it made me angry.

And when she had said something to convince me to let her go, I had nearly lost it. They were probably flirting harmlessly right now, as most young adults did, yet that thought didn't calm me down.

I had been patient. I'd been understanding and, worst of all, giving her space when all I wanted to do was put the brat in her place and then have her in my bed.

The separation between us was getting to my head, affecting my mood.

Holding back my anger and racing thoughts, I hear the front door open and her soft footsteps.