Beats of the Heart [MxM]

15. Rev. Log Stab

Unforgettable. 

Shawn said he was unforgettable.

Miles staggered to the kitchen table and collapsed in a chair.  He leaned his head back and closed his eyes with a laugh. He felt like he was losing his mind—unhinged by his obsession with Shawn Pierce. 

Miles had always tried to reason with his emotions regarding Shawn. The 18-year-old Miles was thoroughly broken spiritually and emotionally. So when a man had shown him kindness, he clung to it. One hand grasped around a noose, and the other held on to a life-saving rope. He eventually let go of the noose, and the catalyst that led to that was Shawn's actions 12 years ago.

He convinced himself that it was gratitude when his heart fluttered, and his stomach flipped when he saw anything related to Shawn. But now that he faced him again, he knew that was bullshit. Something about Shawn captivated him long ago.

He didn't know why he liked someone so much, especially when they had interacted only a few times. It seemed ridiculous and far-fetched. But he had to admit that there were crazier things in this life. Perhaps feeling this way would be okay. 

His head was still thrown back as he groaned. He suddenly remembered how shameless he was 12 years ago. He was still a kid with a fake ID and a stolen wallet. He was rude and forward, while Shawn was nothing but respectful. And then Miles forced himself on him.

"You're a fucking idiot," Miles muttered to himself.

"Why?" Danny's soft voice sounded. 

Miles jolted and sat straight to look at his brother sitting across the table. Miles relaxed and laughed, sinking his head into his hands. 

"It's nothing. Just remembering when I was younger and did something inappropriate." Miles looked back up and tilted his head with curiosity. "Why are you still up?"

Danny bit his lip. "I wanted to talk to you." 

Miles stood up and poured two glasses of water, setting one in front of Danny. "Go ahead. I'm all ears."

It was apparent he didn't know where to start, and he shifted in his seat for a moment. "I'm sorry I never told you that Courtney's cousin was Shawn. I know Aura has approached you about Dirge, and I know you want to protect the DJs and your identity, so I should have told you. But I promise I never said anything. Courtney and Rob don't know I work for Dirge. They thought I found some cushy job that worked well with my schedule. And if I knew he would be coming over, I would have warned you properly. I mean, I should have when Court said something, but with everything that happened before, I was distracted and didn't think. I know you were blindsided, and that was shitty of me as a brother and an employee, so—"

Miles held up a hand to stop his rambling. He could tell that Danny was nervous, and his tone was almost desperate. He wanted to make sure Miles didn't misunderstand.