Waves {𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝒍𝑶𝑶 × 𝑷𝒆𝒓𝒄𝒚 𝑱𝒂𝒄𝒌𝒔𝒐𝒏}

Anti-Hero

Song: Anti Hero - Taylor Swift (no I'm not obsessed shhh)

TW// Mentions of SA

I couldn't think.

My mind was going at a million miles per hour, my heart was beating out of its chest.

It's not that I didn't like kissing Bellamy, don't get me wrong. My brain just kinda... panicked.

I hate my brain.

I shouldn't have run, I know. I should've explained to him.

I should've said;

"Bellamy, you're the most attractive person I've ever met and I really really like you and I really really like kissing you, but I'm completely messed up because I was sexually assaulted as a child."

So why didn't I?

Probably because it's embarrassing.

It's embarrassing to talk about and it's Hades to relive and I hate seeing the pity in people's eyes and I hate people knowing that I wasn't always strong and I wasn't always unbreakable.

I leaned up against a tree, panting.

Taking a moment to look around, I realised I had run a lot further into the woods than I thought.

I scanned the trees, trying to find any hint of familiarity before I heard a yell.

And smelt smoke.

I sprinted in the direction it was coming from.

I couldn't decide whether I'd like it to be the camp or not, but I was nonetheless relieved when I saw the familiar wooden fence.

The fire burned high and bright as people swarmed around trying to stop it.

I recognised the building. That was where the meat was being stored.

I was too late by the time I reached our only food stores.

The flames had taken over the entire building, it had gone past the point of saving.

Murphy, Octavia, and a teen called Del were sprawled nearby, coughing from smoke inhalation.

"This is all your fault." Murphy snarled at Del, starting towards him. "We told you it was too much wood!"

Murphy threw a punch and Del quickly attempted retreat.

"Get the hell away from me," He yelled.

"Hey, hey, hey!" Bellamy forced himself between the two and held them at arm's length.

"Save it for the grounders." He told Murphy.

"Bell, now what the hell are we gonna do?" Octavia interrupted. "That was all the food."

Bellamy glanced over the crowd.

Nearly 100 teenagers to feed and no food.

His eyes found mine as he looked, but he quickly turned away.

I needed to talk to him, but now was not the time.

"Miller, Jasper, Monroe, start coordinating people to help put this fire out," Bellamy ordered. "It's too dark to do anything else right now. We'll figure it out in the morning."

He gestured for Murphy to follow him, leaving the rest of us behind.

I figured I might as well make myself useful, so I walked up to Miller.

"What can I do?"

✯¸.•'*¨'*•✿ ✿•*'¨*'•.¸✯

The next morning, Bellamy and Clarke were standing over the ruins in an intense discussion.