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Kimia David's•
"Kim"

I glanced down at his head on my lap. I feel oddly weird after I had my hair shaved off leaving me with a baby smooth surface. I was quick to put a beanie on my head to cover it. I haven't even let MJ see yet. Though I felt strong enough to take control and matters into my own hands by shaving the remainder, I still held insecurities and hurt about the fact that it was gone.

After I got back from my moms private stylist, Malik came back home shortly after. He didn't say much, and when we hugged he hold on for what felt like forever. I could sense the sadness coming off of him but when I asked what happened he said nothing. I knew that he felt whatever happened would only make me feel sad too. I just wished that he didn't have to worry about that. I wished I didn't have cancer at all. It's as if that stops others from sharing their trauma with me because they feel as though mine is greater and they shouldn't be complaining.

"Malik?" I whispered as I rub my thumb across his cheek caressing his face.

He removes his attention away from the movie we're watching in my bed. "Hmm?" He hums taking that same hand he places a kiss on the back of it while staring into my eyes.

"I...." I trail off dreading saying what's been on my mind all day. "I think we should break up."

He sits up staring at me like I've lost my mind. "Fuck is you talking about Kim?" He questions.

I avoid his gaze as I reply back to him. "This isn't easy I know it isn't," my voice shakes slightly. "I-I can't be selfish MJ. I can't have you all to myself and put you through this."

"You sound stupid as fuck." I find myself shocked that he talks to me like that but also relieved that for once he wasn't letting my condition guide how he really feels. "I love you and-"

"And I love you too," I cut him off. "Which is why I want you to be happy once I'm gone," I reach out cupping his cheek staring at him with loving eyes. "I don't want you to be alone. I want you to be happy, I want you to be loved-"

"Kimia," his voice is strained when he speaks. "Don't talk like that. Don't say when you're gone. You're going to beat this."

"We don't know that," I remind him. "We don't know how long I have. The doctor said-"

"The doctor said that with chemo and much more you can get better-"

"But my body isn't reacting fast enough to the chemo, my body is damn near shutting down around me and," I fight back the urge to cry. "Next the only option I'll have is a stem cell transplant. If that doesn't work then....then there is nothing they can do. Even now they barely offer me help."

He lifts his hand up and I grip his wrist making his hand pause on my beanie. I shake my head more tears falling down my face as I allow him to remove the beanie. I expected him to stare at me with shock, disgust, or judgement. Though I know that's not in his character that's how I've been staring at myself. But instead his eyes gaze into mine with pure admiration and love. He leans in kissing me on the lips and this kiss is the most purest, innocent, intimate kiss we'd ever had. I can't help but kiss him back falling against him. When we pull away I stare into his eyes speaking softly. "I just don't want us to be naive about this. The more honest we are the less it'll hurt."

He places his hand over mine grabbing it he gently places my palm against where his heart is located I can feel it beating rapidly. "Even if....and I mean if you didn't get better. I will never love anyone like you-"

"Malik-"

"I mean it," the seriousness in MJ's voice scares me but only makes me love him more. "It doesn't matter what happens, how much time passes. My heart will only ever long for you, will only ever love you. You're my first and last love Kimia David's. And," he pauses and I watch nervousness fill his face. "If I don't marry you I'll live a life filled with regret."

"What are you saying...?"

"I'm saying that I don't care about what you say or your condition,"

"I want to marry you."

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