Intoxicating

Chapter Nineteen: Old Habits

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I woke up to the sight of butterflies. It was beautiful.

I start to smell food and get anxious. I can't just walk down there, this isn't my house. I tap Alec to wake him up. "Alec" I repeat until he is a little conscious. "What?" He mumbles under his breath. "I need you to get up." I respond, trying to shove him awake. "Why and stop shoving me." He grunted.

How am I supposed to wake him up?

I climb on top of him and start to gyrat my body against his. "Get up, please" I whine. "I'm hungry" I proceeded to whine. "So go get food." He says placing a pillow on his face shielding the sun beaming through the window. I start to move my body against his, this time more aggressive.

I can feel his bulge starting to form in his pants. I start to lose myself in my actions. I snap back to reality when I hear Alec grunts under the pillow. Casting the pillow to the side, he sits up grabbing my throat, supporting me up.

"Don't start something you can't finish" I wanted to know what he meant, of course but I mean when do I listen?

I don't want to but I'm hungry.

"Fine, but will you come down there with me, please?" I ask, placing a kiss on his forehead. He rolls his eyes, letting out a sigh.

Instantly, I started smiling. I mean I'm good at getting what I want so this wasn't a surprise that he was giving in so easily. We got up, put our clothes on and then headed downstairs.

Yay food.

His mother was downstairs, cooking. I smiled at the sight of everyone downstairs.

I loved my family more than anything, however we never did this. Wake up and just eat breakfast as a family.

We would wake up wondering if there was ever anything to eat. My parents were in debt from borrowing money from Dante's family, however when they couldn't come up with the money, they sold me.

Dante had told his parents he was in love with me and wanted me to be his wife. So if I married him, their debt was paid no problems, right?

Yeah, just a very possessive, controlling, and abusive man taking advantage of a fresh 18 year old is no fucking problem.

I shake my head, knocking the topic out of my head. When I come back, I'm eating bread eat with Alec and his mother. I focus back in on the conversation between Alec and his mother. "You're father will be here tomorrow." She states.

"Ok" He said, dryly. "Can you please be nice? For me?" She pleads. I turn to see Alec's hands balling into a fist. "Yeah."

There's that attitude whenever his father is brought up.

"We are leaving, we will see you tomorrow night." He grits and I look at him. Did he not hear me? I said I was hungry.

"Alec, let her eat" I turn to him as he speaks. "We have some things to do. We will see you tomorrow." He turns to walk away, grabbing me. I grab a biscuit off the table, shoving it in my mouth.

I'm fucking hungry.

I turn my head to wave his mother goodbye. We got in the car and I thought maybe he just needs some space. I'll just ask him when we get to the hotel.

A few moments later, we arrive and get checked in. I get my suitcase and place it in the corner. Before he could get comfy, I decided to speak first.

"Hey, what was that about?" I ask, walking up to him. "Drop it" He spit as he moves to the bed and lays down. "Why can't you tell me?" I ask, starting to mess with my hands.

"Rose, drop it"

Rose...

Why? Does he not feel like he can tell me?

"NO. What is wrong with you?" I yell, changing my tone. He gets up and walks directly to me. His hazel eyes boring into mine. "Why? Why do you need to know? You think talking about it is going to make me feel better?" He snaps.

Well yeah. Talking makes people feel better.

His words echoing in my ear. I knew he was just hurting and needed help. "Yes Alec" I say, grabbing his hands. He snatches his hands back. "You're so naive!" He spits.

Ouch.

"Alec"

"Talking isn't going to fix shit. We aren't kids, Rosalina."

never said we were but ok

"This isn't you, you're just going through something right now." I say.

"No, this isn't me." He blurts out and I pause. My eyes focus in on his. "What?" Its barely above a whisper. I could feel tears trying to break free.

"Nothing." He mumbles to himself. "No. No. No. I want to know what you meant." I snap back, pushing him.

If he didn't want this. Before I came to fucking Spain would've been a nice time to tell me.

But if he didn't want this, i wanted to hear it from him.

"You want to know what I'm talking about. I'm talking about this. I don't do this." He spits, pointing between us. His words cut me like a knife.

"You said you would try for me." I speak faintly. "Well, maybe I didn't think this through." He murmurs as he grabs his keys and leaves.

What...

I don't understand...

What did I do?

What happened?

Was it me? or something else?

regardless he shouldn't have spoken to me like that!

Right but now he's gone?

He doesn't want me.

I knew something like this would hurt. Just as I realizeI love his dumb ass.

Fuck

Great fucking job, Rosalina

My thoughts started going crazy. Where did he go? Is he okay? Did he just leave me?

Was this over?

I start going over all the decisions I've made. It was dumb of me to think he was just going to give up what he's had for me. He wasn't willing to try hard enough. He's right.

I am naive.

I should have never got involved with him.

I crawl into the bed and start crying. His cologne still lingering on the pillows, I grab it and start sobbing even harder. I didn't even care about him coming in.

Out of all the things I've experienced, this is high on my list.

I had completely fallen in love with him. Although he might not love me.

That was what hurt.

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