Survivalist

Chapter 13

Summary:

The aftermath of the attack on Alexandria leaves you and Negans relationship in a rocky situation.

Notes:

Hey y'all! Happy Friday!
I almost have this entire fic finished. I am planning on doing another book of the same story, just in a different space. I hate when fics are way too long and could be multiple different books. I hope you enjoy this chapter! I can't wait for you all to see what comes next.

Chapter Text

You don't love me like you used to
You don't hear me when I'm talking to you
Just an old book that just breeze on through
You don't love me like you used to -

You Don't Love Me Like You Used To - The Lone Bellow

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Negan asked, pushing you into your bedroom. It was your old room, from before he took you to live with him. The vase with flowers in it was gone, the windows were gone, the comfortable black sofa was gone. This room now only had a table, a bed, and an empty bookcase. He slammed the door loudly and asserted his dominance by walking directly in front of you, your bodies basically pressed together. 

“What the fuck is wrong with me? What the fuck is wrong with you, Negan?” Yelled, squaring him up. 

“Do you have any idea what you could have done? You could have died… the baby could have died and for what?” he asked.

“For Carl, for Daryl, for Michone, for Rick. That is what for.” 

You pointed to your chest, your heart was breaking by the second. Tears fell because you knew this wasn’t over, not by a long shot. There would be more death, more destruction, and more chaos. 

“That is my family. And you almost killed one of my family members today. I practically helped raise Carl, I see him like a son and you almost took someone I love away from me.” you let out a sob, wiping your eyes as Negan continued to stare you down. You could see, even in a small way that he was building up compassion. Understanding you underneath all of that anger. Because you knew that he was a person. He wasn’t a robot and he did understand you. 

“I just don’t want anybody else to die, Negan. And it’s not too late to stop that from happening. We can just go right now.” You went to pull his arm but he golted you away. 

“We can go babe, just the two of us. To that cabin, raise our baby. That's all we need. We can put the rest of this behind us.”

You tried to think of the elegant words, the perfect thing to say. To make him understand why you so desperately were fighting for this. Why you believed he could change. And then you thought of Rick's words. From a long time ago, and from a place far away. 

“We’re not too far gone.”

Negan shook his head at you, and you let out another sob. 

“We aren’t. It’s never too late.” you went to hug him, but like a wolf he violently pushed you away. Negan pushed you against the wall, and you heard a thud as one of the paintings which was hanging on the otherwise bare wall shattered. You gasped, you didn’t feel any pain from this. That would come later. Your adrenaline when you hit the wall was way too high for you to feel anything other than grief and determination. Greif at the loss of a love, and determination to make him change. He had to change. But after that left your body, you felt the pain begin to bury deep in the back of your head. His eyes were in pain, like he couldn’t believe what he just did to you. Like he couldn’t believe his own actions… He couldn’t believe that he hurt you.