Cult

Knight, night [author's note]

Hey guys, 

I've written a lot of author's notes in the past 2 and a half years I've been on wattpad, but none of them have been as difficult to write as this one. I have truly enjoyed and appreciated all the feedback I've received-- both positive and negative-- and I feel that I have grown so much as a writer and a person. Unfortunately, wattpad is no longer a place that I feel comfortable or understood as a writer. Wattpad has changed since the publication of some fanfics and it will continue to change. And that's okay because I have more valuable things to put my time and effort into that will actually get me somewhere in life.

Some of you guys have been reading my work since the first chapter of KNIGHT and some of you guys only know me from CULT. Either way, I appreciate all the time you guys have devoted to reading and commenting on this story. As I've become busier with my school work, clubs, internships, family, and other important things, I've lost crucial time I spent thinking creatively about my characters, about my future stories.

I used to daydream of scenes and different concepts to develop my stories, but as I've become more involved with my studies and my school and myself as a person, I've found myself moving on from 'daydreaming.' There's nothing wrong with being a dreamer. I still consider myself to be an artistic, visual person and that's why I've decided to study the design/media and advertising. I will always be a writer, but that doesn't mean I don't have other talents or interests and that's precisely why I've decided to leave wattpad. I'm young and graduating university next year and I want to have a nice, steady job. College is where people try new things, seek new ways to express themselves and find what they really love. Wattpad has been a great stepping stone for me, but I'm ready for bigger and better things.

I don't want anyone to feel like I'm just abandoning this story or wattpad in general because I'm lazy or unappreciative. That is the farthest thing from the truth. I just have realized a lot of things about myself in the past 6 months in particular that I'm trying to pursue and wattpad isn't part of the future I envision for myself. 

Two summers ago, I was writing on wattpad for nearly 12 hours a day and updating two very different stories in the same day. I loved writing and I loved my characters, but I was getting absolutely nowhere in life. It's ok to have your fanfic obsessions and what not, but just know that time is valuable and there's so much to learn outside your laptop and iphone that will come and go. The internet will always be around, but you're not going to be 15 or 18 or 21 forever; make your time count and try new things.

I wish you all the best of luck and I want to encourage you guys to set your phones down for a minute and look at the world around you. It's never too late to get a job, join clubs, attend school events, etc. Yes, I know that wattpad and one direction in general are a great safe haven away from the worries and anxieties that being social brings, but trust me, my life has changed so positively since the day I got my first job in retail. The pay was shitty, but it pulled me away from my laptop and taught me how to be confident and to forget how many social anxities I had.

Sorry this was so long. I just want you guys to feel motivated to do something with your lives, not because you need to "grow up," but because I feel like most of us one direction fans are so sheltered and afraid of the outside world. We complain about having weight issues or social anxities and yet we don't do anything to solve them. 

Although it was very difficult to believe that Zayn left the band, I stand by and support him. His decision to leave really encouraged me to tie the knot with wattpad and move on to new things. I don't know what stage you guys are in life, but it's never too early to get out there and do something new. 

Best,

M Xx