INEFFABLE FEELINGS || Jihan x Fem Reader

CHAP 37

Y/N's POV

Wow, they are so crazy. I thought as I watched Monday and Soojin Unnie dance on the dance floor. I wonder if they will regret this later. My phone abruptly vibrated. I took it out and saw that I had a new message from Jinyoung Oppa saying that I should meet him outside this venue.

Why, though? I looked at the entrance to the venue and saw him waving his hand. Why didn't he just come here? I got up and went to him. Oh, shit, I forgot to tell Jihan where I was going. I was about to text her, but someone had already pulled me outside and it was Jinyoung Oppa.

"Oppa, what's the rush?" I ask as we walk. He almost tripped, but I caught his arm, so he didn't. "Oppa, are you okay?" I asked worriedly. "Don't worry, I'm fine. I just want to talk to you," he said as he stood up straight. I could tell he'd been drinking because I could smell it on his breath. Is he drunk?

"Oppa, are you drunk?" I asked. "Uhh, no. I just had a few drinks," he said, shrugging and suddenly turning to face me. I stopped at my place quickly, so I wouldn't be too close to him.

"Oppa?" I asked, since he was not saying anything. He just looked at me with his lazy eyes and took both of my hands and held them. I look at our hands weirdly as he caress it. I felt uncomfortable as he did this. "Umm, are you oka-" he cut me off before I can finish my sentence. "I love you," he said abruptly.

I looked at him, shocked by his sudden confession. Umm, is he talking about brother-sister love or- "I have loved you ever since we met in the library. "I knew then that I wanted you to be my girlfriend," he said, still caressing my hands. What the hell did he just say? A girlfriend? Uh, uh, that's a no for me. I slowly took my hand from him and clasped them together.

"Umm, I'm not sure how to put it, but I only see you as a friend or an older brother," I admitted nervously. I felt myself shiver as the wind gushed in our direction. "But you don't have a boyriend!" He suddenly yelled, startling me. "Yes, I don't. But Oppa, I already love someone else," I said to him, trying to calm him down. He just shook his head.

"No! I love you! Please be my girlfriend," he said, taking a step to get closer to me. "Oppa, I can't. I alrea-" I couldn't finish what I was going to say because he suddenly kissed me. 

He fucking kiss me. And I don't like it. I pushed him away "What the fuck, Oppa!" I shouted, wiping my mouth. Arghh, I could taste the alcohol also. "I did that because I love yo-" I didn't let him finish 'cause I slap him. I slapped him so hard that my hand tingled afterward.

"Oppa! I told you I already love someone else!" I shouted again. I'm really angry right now. I suddenly thought of Jihan. Oh my god, what have I done?  "I hate you," I spat at him before I ran away. I felt my tears falling down as I ran. What will Jihan think of this? Will she hate me? Or leave me? Arghh, I'm so messed up.

Why was I so dense that I didn't notice that Jinyoung Oppa liked me? I only thought of him as an older brother. Why did it turn out like this? This is all my fault. I hate myself. I ran and ran until I ran out of the energy to do so. I sat on the grass, looking up at the stars. Why do bad things only happen when I'm having a good time? I ask, but no one answers me.

Well, who am I kidding? I'm alone here. I laid down and stared at the stars. They always witnessed my ups and downs. I wonder what they think of my life? Would they think of it as a roller coaster?  Of course, they don't think they are just made of hydrogen. I sighed. I must be crazy.

"Found you," I heard someone say. I opened my eyes to see that it was Jihan, looking down at me. I immediately sat up. "What are you doing here?" I ask as she sits down beside me. "What are you doing out here?" She asked me back. I fell silent as I remembered what had happened earlier. I heard her sigh.