Harper Isabel Todd

Chapter 9

Gotham Ikea, May 16th

"Tell me again why we need disguises?" Dick glanced at Damian who had brown eyes, a baseball cap and weird glasses on.

"Our faces aren't exactly low key; we can't attract attention," Damian huffed, "fix your stupid beard."

"Yes Sir," Dick grinned, "what do you want to get first?"

"The essentials, a dresser with a large enough surface to be used as a changing table, a baby swing, a high chair, a comfortable rocking chair, it has to recline too, more clothes, she'll outgrow whatever she has really fast, the growth during the first year is really rapid, he doesn't have a diaper genie, he keeps going back and forth to the bathroom," Damian counted, he dug out of his pocket a list.

"You did your research," Dick smiled as he read the rest of the baby items list.

"Of course I did," Damian glared at him, "Pennyworth and Drake can only do so much and clearly Todd is not ready to go out with Harper, it falls upon us to make sure they have what they need. Don't worry I used a secure server for my research, father won't think of stalking my history there."

Dick couldn't resist, he pulled Damian into a hug in the middle of the store.

"Unhand me at once Grayson," Damian wiggled out of Dick's grip, "she doesn't need the whole crib he bought, but I suppose it was panic that made him buy the biggest and most expensive crib he could find."

"How do you know it was the most expensive crib?"

"As I said, I've done my research," Damian dismissed, "I don't like the white of this dresser but it is the most efficient model."

"We have it in other colors," a salesman appeared out of nowhere.

"Where are those other colors displayed?" Damian asked.

"We only display neutral colors, but here," the salesman, Mark, handed Damian a catalogue.

"So it's either this alarmingly cold white or different shades of pink or blue? What if someone doesn't wish to submit to the clichés of pink or blue?" Damian examined the colors again, "I want this dresser in eggshell white or a natural wood color preferably oak, something warm. Can I find it here or must I go to a different store?"

"Eggshell white?"

"If you do not have an answer for me, please get me someone who does, I do not wish to spend my day here," Damian gave him back the catalogue.

"Hi, Mark," Dick read the name tag, "what my brother is trying to say is-"

"I think I was pretty clear, but if you wish to write a book about the lack of choices and incompetence of the staff be my guest, I have other things to purchase and a niece to visit," Damian turned his back and went to a different isle.

"Sir, I'm sorry, the sale season is crazy," Mark started apologizing to Dick.

"It's okay, he's just worried about our brother who is a first time and single father," Dick smiled warmly then pulled out his phone, "this is the white and this is the oak, is there anything like it here?"

"There is one in natural wood, but it's more expensive than the model he chose, the wood is imported from Tibet," Mark walked with Dick towards the storage room, "we only got 3 of them and they arrived yesterday. We haven't had the chance to display it, there's a sale in the outdoors section and it's been crazy. This dresser is slightly bigger than the one he chose, but it's a much better quality."

"Uh huh," Dick examined the dresser, it had 2 extra drawers and one cabinet and the wood still smelled like wood, "you said Tibet right?"

"I did," Mark nodded, "the coating is heat and water resistant, it's a changing table and dresser."