Alone Without You

31 (The End)

TW's:
-Mentions everything that happened
-Mentions mental hospital

And then one week later it was time for me to go to the mental hospital. I had been very scared to go there and I wouldn't be able to see Amy for a while. Maybe she could come with Dream once when he was visiting me.

Dream brought me to the mental hospital and I had heard I had to go here for at least three months. I hated the fact that I would be locked in here for this long, but I understood the reasoning behind it. I did attempt suicide twice and I did scream all day long because I was so scared. It was better for me to go here.

The first day was really hard in here, I didn't want to trust anyone and I didn't talk to my therapist yet. I couldn't trust him and I just found him scary, but after a week I finally released my emotions.

I told him how I got raped and he made me go back to the moment, performing EMDR on me so I would have the connection between the panic and the trauma break.

It didn't work the first few weeks, but I started being a little more relaxed after that time. I didn't scream every night anymore, I did cry a lot and during therapy, I sometimes completely froze and screamed because of my fear.

I was always really happy that Dream visited me twice a week and he was always just here and kept me calm. He made me sit on his lap, hugging me from behind. He was allowed to hug me whenever he wanted now, but he still needed to ask me often. I felt bad for giving so many rules, but I just panicked too badly otherwise.

Sap and Bad were still in England and they were taking care of Amy with Dream of course. Dream told me stories about Amy every time he was here and it appeared to be that she was really attached to Dream already. She always wanted to sit with Dream and it made me sad but also really happy.

I just hoped she would like me too when I came back, but I wasn't sure. I wasn't there for her and I felt like letting her down.

Zoey had gone to jail, the police found her and Zoey broke after a long while, telling the police that she was mentally not okay, but didn't realise this herself until she noticed how traumatised I was, and after she realised she actually caused us to have a child without my permission. I hadn't forgiven her at all and I was glad she went to jail.

Today was the last day I had to spend in the mental hospital and I was feeling a lot better. I didn't have thoughts about suicide anymore and I was honestly excited to meet Amy again. We had decided to not let her come here in the mental hospital, because there were often people screaming and we didn't want to scare her.

I was waiting for Dream and meanwhile I was typing out a tweet. I had my phone back again and I wanted to tell people what went wrong in my life. I was still traumatised, but I learnt that talking really helped.

Hey guys, as I told you I was going to become father and I haven't really tweeted anything after that. I'm finally ready to tell you what's going on, because I'm far enough in my recovery for this.

I'm a rape victim, I have been raped by a girl and she got pregnant because of that. Dream's and my baby, Amy, is our kid now and Dream is her father. We don't consider the person who raped me as her mother and to clarify she is also in jail now for probably the rest of her life.

Amy is our beautiful baby, we really consider it OUR baby, so I would also like you to actually call Dream the dad too.

I have just been inpatient for three months to work on my trauma and Sap and Bad are here too to take care of Amy. I was completely on the wrong path, but I'm back on the right way now with help of Dream.

I posted it and smiled as a stone seemed to fall off of my chest.

6 months later...

'Dream, can you open the door?' I asked Dream. 'Amy is playing with me.'

'Sure.'

Amy was now almost ten months old and she had been doing great, just as me. Of course, I was really scarred by the fact that I was raped, but I had processed it now and I was happy to have Amy and Dream.

Dream and I moved to America, it was hard, but we managed to move in into Dream's house. I could get a Visa because we had a kid together so I was also staying here forever.

My parents had accepted it too and they visited me a few times already, I had forgiven them, I just wanted to be with Dream and not with them anymore. They accepted that and found it perfectly fine in the end. They understood it now I had a baby too.

I looked at Amy and she was making soft sounds, grabbing my fingers constantly. I kissed her forehead and smiled at her. She loved me just as much as she loved Dream and since that was my biggest fear I was glad she forgave me for not caring for her.

I looked up at Dream walking in the room and he smiled, hugging me carefully. 'Hey, Georgie. Are you alright today?'

'I'm feeling better than any day the last years.'

Dream smiled and hugged me, smiling throughout it. 'I love you.'

'I love you more.' I smiled at him and then took a deep breath. 'Dream?'

'Yes?'

'In the past I have always called myself a victim, but today-. I'm not a victim anymore, I'm a survivor and I'm so alone without you.'

Dream smiled as he hugged me tightly. 'You are a survivor and you will never be alone anymore.'

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