𝐓𝐄𝐋𝐋 𝐌𝐄 𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐄𝐂𝐑𝐄𝐓𝐒 𝐅𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐎𝐋𝐃 𝐘𝐎𝐔

fourteen

harry's pov

It's been about a couple of months, and nothing has happened since. I haven't seen y/n since the day after the Yule Ball, and our big moment. Maybe she left me, maybe she didn't enjoy it, maybe she doesn't like me, maybe her father withdrew her from Hogwarts.
Not entirely sure.
She hasn't been attending Snape's classes these last couple of months, so I'm guessing she's no longer a Hogwarts student, and now I go back, go back to stay with the Dursley's, for another pathetic bloody summer.

As I arrive on the front door steps of 4 Privet Dr, I knock, and immediately here the loud thumps of Dudley running down the stairs.

"Mum! Potter's home!" He yells opening the door and shutting it again.

I walk in taking all my belongings up to my room, which I surprisingly have got, a real upgrade since the cupboard under the stairs. I enter my room, to find that nothing has changed, and that I'll be spending my next three months in this hell hole. I'll be celebrating my 17th birthday, in four enclosed walls, with everyone forgetting.
Like every year.
I've grown depressed these last couple of months, as I have pushed away from Hermione and Ron. They've started to go their own path, where they can't seem to not be together, I've become a third wheel almost, at every party, and every common room visit.

"Potter! Come down for dinner!" Dudley knocks on my door aggressively.

I head out from my bedroom, walking down the wooden stairs into the kitchen. I try to ignore everyone as much as possible and just go on with my afternoon eating dinner and making myself nonexistent for the next three months in my bedroom.

As the night becomes darker, I turn on my light, and grab my diary from my bag that I haven't written in a while.

My dearest heart, why have you been broken so many times?
Is this another time?
Another experience of a broken heart?
A broken heart from what was said to be a forever friendship, but is no more.
A broken heart from who I thought will be my forever, is no where to be seen.
Diary, collect my thoughts, because I still love her. I love y/n. She's what made me happy, mother her eyes I can't describe them anymore than emeralds. Father, her hair is dark, like the current night sky.
My dearest mother and father, I've told her I love her, but I don't know if it's the same back. Mother, I want to be with her, I want to live with her forever, I want to marry her. I know that's pathetic for a 16 year old to say, but Mum, I know she's the one.
And father, I know how much you loved my mother, Lily, and I love y/n just as much.
I understand your love, that you both have been providing me with since day one, problem is, I fall in love too easily. Mother, is she the right one? Will she love me until the very end?

I throw my diary to the side, and turn my lamp off, thinking of what I've written. I wish I grew up with them. I turn to the side, cover myself with the blanket, and shut my eyes.

[harry's dream]

Harry you shouldn't be here. You should've died that night Harry.
You were being targeted.
Harry the war is coming for you.
Harry it will be dark, and deep, and rubble will start to fall, and dementors flying around sucking every living memory out of everyone.

Harry it's your fault.

Don't you think Y/n's father is safe either Harry. He won't do what was told.
And you, will be responsible for his death Harry.
Leaving your love with no one anymore.
She'll be devastated.

And it's entirely, your fault. Again.

Y/n won't be with you for long Harry. She's going to be after you. She will join the dark side. She will be fighting with Voldemort to kill you.
And you filthy fool falling in love.
She doesn't love you.
Quit it Harry.

This is your fault, your fault for destroying Hogwarts. Your fault, it will take years to rebuild. You caused many lives to be gone. Harry you should've never came to Hogwarts.

Y/n your love is after you. She will stab you right in the back. The amount of love you gave her will not change the mind of her mission.
She's being set up with Malfoy, to kill you.

Harry this would've never happened if it wasn't for you...

————
I spring out of my bed, panting, as I look around my room.
Harry stop dreaming about this.
Y/n does love you. But she isn't here, isn't here to comfort me and tell me everything will be alright. Isn't here to fall back asleep with me like last time.
My dearest y/n, I miss you.