Would You ↪ Bradley Simpson

thirteen ↪ that time I fell hard

The night was chilly, but I didn't mind some fresh air. The patio was fairly illuminated, with dim lights hanging from the closest trees, a couple of loveseats and swinging seats. I went for the latter and tried to relax. I had never really been surrounded by that many people for too long before, I sort of felt like I needed to recharge. I was lost in deep thought, eyes upon the starry sky, when someone approached me. I curiously moved my attention to him and stared like an idiot. Confusion washed over me when I spotted what he was carrying.

"Blankie?" he softly said. "I figured it'd be chilly out here"

He was offering me a cosy blanket. Why was he offering me a blanket? I blankly stared at him, not sure of what to say.

"I just wanted to apologize for earlier" Bradley thoughtfully ran his fingers through his locks of curls.

At that point, I was genuinely concerned. I had no idea what he was apologizing for. Taylor's behavior? He had nothing to do with it. Did he take it on himself? Was he taking the blame for it? Why? — "You- what, sorry?"

His eyes wandered everywhere but on me as he unsurely sat next to me on the double swinging seat. He unfolded the blanket and clumsily placed it over our bottoms. I could feel his left foot nervously tapping against the grass, making the whole swing move. What was he so anxious for?

"You're a good guy, Bradley."

"Mmh?" he shot his eyes up at me and eventually took in my words. "Um, thank you"

"Don't beat yourself up for girls like that, they don't deserve you anyway" I casually shrugged, hiding how I was so helplessly failing at keeping it together.

The warmth of his shoulder brushing against mine was driving me all types of crazy. It was insane how much of an impact that boy had on me in such a short time of knowing him. It wasn't about beauty. It was the way his lips would curve up when he smiled, the way he laughed so cheerfully, and the goofiness he'd show off whenever he was happy.

"What's on your mind, darling?"

I tried to hide the smile that so effortlessly crept on my face at the sound of that nickname, for some idiot reason. I'm thinking about you. — "Just vibing"

I instantly regretted saying that. Just vibing?! Really?! The struggle was real. Bradley let out a soft throaty chuckle. — "You're just vibing at three in the morning? What's up?"

Somehow, for some reason, the weight I was trying so hard to carry on my shoulders lifted up. I let out a low breath and felt my whole body relax. It was so nice. "I can't sleep at night" I blurted out, feeling the intimacy of the upcoming late-night talk intensify.

Bradley shifted in his seat and faced me. His muscles softened as well and he also lowered his tone. "Why is that?"

"I'm not sure, so much is going on" I shrugged.

The curly boy thoughtfully nodded. "Your writing perhaps? How many words left?"

It was heartwarming to me how he seemed to be remembering most of our conversations. — "Two thousand"

"You'll get there, eventually. You're pretty smart" Brad's voice drastically softened even more.

My eyes soon met his as I looked up at him. I couldn't help but smile at that pretty face of his. Jeez. He lazily pulled out his earphones from his hoodie's pocket and plugged it into his phone. He stuck his left hand out, handing me one of the ends, while with the other hand he picked out a song. He looked conflicted for a moment, his thumb moving up and down from one song to another. He sighed and shot his head in my direction. "I kind of wanted you to hear both of these but-"

"Go ahead, then" I boldly answered.

His eyes studied me for a moment longer than bearable, my whole being melting down under such intense gaze. I broke eye contact by peeking at his phone, reading the titles of the songs he was going to play. Paper Hearts and Time Is Not On Our Side. Bradley clicked on the first one and breathed out, closing his eyes shut.

It hit me right away. "Is this you singing?!"

"Yeh," he snorted. "That was fast"

I laughed. "Just...it's your voice"

 My eyes drifted as I carefully took in every word he sang. My heart ached at each of those. That song was different from the ones he and the boys had played on their gig, a more serious tone, heartbreaking. So that's what it was. That's what he did too. He wrote down his emotions on paper hoping they would stay trapped in those lines. It was that deep. The more the song played, the more I was in full-on crying mode. My heart broke at the thought of him feeling like that ever. I frantically looked away, hoping he wouldn't see how much that song was affecting me. At that exact moment, I felt his warm hand brushing on mine. I couldn't help but shoot my eyes up at him in confusion. His soft teary eyes met mine for a brief second before he closed it shut and moved closer. He wrapped his right arm around me and pulled me to his chest.

 "It's okay, I got you" his muffled voice sent tingles to my skin.

Time Is Not On Our Side played when I gave in to the hug. Brad's free hand travelled up to my hair as he stroked and twirled his fingers through it. I legit felt like melting down into his touch, blending with his warmth, drowning in his scent. I completely gave in to him and helplessly gave him full control, let him do whatever he wanted. I abruptly regained my self-control when I heard him softly sob against my hair. My heart flipped inside my chest. The playlist on his phone went on, now playing a song named Stay. I slowly sat straight up and untangled myself from Brad's arm. His eyes fluttered open as he stared at me, confusion washing over him. I softly smiled at him and tried not to shake too much as I slowly wrapped my arm around his neck and pulled him into a warm hug.

"You're okay" I whispered against his locks of curls.

I ran my fingers through his hair and gently caressed his scalp while, with the other hand, I rubbed his back and drew imaginary circles with my fingers. I wasn't sure what was going on, but we were a whole mess.

"I'm sorry" his low voice broke. I held him even tighter.

"It's okay, you're okay"