This chapter was something I accidentally posted at one point- Oops,
Shuichi watched as Miu fiddled with her fingers.
She looked so full of guilt.
After hearing about Kokichi dying, a boy who Shuichi figured he loved, Miu revealed she was the last person who spent time with Kokichi.
She wished him a goodbye, and said she would check on him.
But she got distracted with classes.
Rantaro took fault, for the fact that he could have left class earlier.
Kokichi made sure to keep everyone at the edge of their seats before his death.
He sure did that to Shuichi.
Shuichi bit onto his lip, close to crying.
This was terrible.
Absolutely terrible.
Why did Kokichi have to do this?
He finally was getting close to him...
Close to Kokichi.
Shuichi started to consider his thoughts more.
How he liked Kokichi.
Why did Kokichi die before Shuichi had the chance to admit it?
He felt a hand tap his shoulder, and he turned his head.
There was Miu.
She gave him a tiny nod.
She looked broken, yet disguised it quite well with her expression and the way she stood.
She seemed unbothered.
But Shuichi knew better than that.
Miu didn't like to seem weak or vulnerable.
So, most likely she was broken, and close to tears.
And Kokichi wasn't here to get that side out of her anymore.
Miu sat down next to Shuichi, and they remained quiet for a few moments.
It was really nice.
Very quiet, and comfortable.
Miu finally broke it, "He wanted me to tell ya' somethin'."
"Really?" Shuichi laughed softly, and looked towards Miu.
Miu nodded very slightly, "Kichi loved ya'. He fallen' for ya', and got this stupid fuckin' flowery shit."
"Flowery.... shit?" Shuichi repeated.
"Hanah-hanahaki. He considered it a punishment or whatsnot for cuttin' ya' soulmate string." Miu whispered.
Shuichi raised his body more.
Hanahaki?
Wasn't that something fictional?
Miu turned her head to the ground, "He was close to dyin' anyways. I wanted him to get surgery right away, since it seemed ya' would never love him, but he decided to prolong his sufferin'. I think if I pushed the little dimwit for surgery a bit harder, he woulda done it."
Shuichi felt his eyes start to burn, "So.. he loved me, and he was suffering from it?"
"Chokin' on flowers and shit. Watchin' that shit in front of your fuckin' eyes is horrifyin'. At first, it was petals. Then over time, ya' watch him become adjusted to coughing bloody fuckin' roses." Miu signalled towards the white roses around the room, "This shit's fuckin' mockery, I say. I watched 'im cough this fuckin' shit so much, it seems like everyone is shitten' on his memory. God fuck."
Shuichi went silent, "H-how co-could we have.. sto-stopped it?"
"Surgery, him losin' feelin's, ya' lovin' 'im back. Shit like that." Miu muttered. "I didn' wanna risk losin' him faster than I was. So.. That's why I kept up with my questionin' on your feelings. And I just.... I just hoped y'ud like 'im back sooner or later. And... help h-him..."
Shuichi was kinda shocked from hearing her stutter.
He could've stopped this.
He could have helped Kokichi.
Kokichi could have been here today.
"I-I'm sorry." Shuichi muttered.
Miu glanced over, "What for? Ya' didn' fuckin' end up liking him. Whatev'."
"I-I... I do like him though..." Shuichi muttered, "I.. I realized it recently. I... I have liked him for a long while, b-but...."
Shuichi let out a sob, which confused him, since he didn't even note he was crying.
"I was an idiot, damnit. I... I thought my feelings of liking him, were feelings of friendship." Shuichi muttered.
Miu shook her head slightly, "Fuck. I.. I'm gonna go."
And she stood up and left, just as fast like that.
It was his fault Kokichi died.
He could have saved him.
He could have made sure Kokichi was okay.
He wished to hold Kokichi, and hug him, and tell him everything could be okay, before he died.
He wished he could confess.
Would things have gone differently?
Would Kokichi still be here today?
More likely than not, yes, he would.
Now, because it took Shuichi too long to recognize his feelings.
Everyone around him was suffering.
Shuichi ruined tons of people for something minor.
He wanted to tell Kokichi he liked him.
But it was...
It was far too late to do anything.