Thomas opened the door and stepped into his house. It was near silent and he found himself sighing. It had taken him months to admit to himself that his parents were having marital problems, and now that he had home was just that much harder to go home to.
"Mom, Dad, I'm back!" he called, trying to fill the silence. His only reply was sniffling and muffled cries coming from the sitting room. "Dad? Mom?" Thomas could hear the panic and fear starting to creep into his voice.
He peered around the door, dreading what he'd see. It was worse than he'd thought. Peter Jefferson, the strongest man Thomas had ever known, was curled in a ball on the sofa, sobbing into a pillow.
"Papa? What happened?" Thomas knew he sounded the same he did as a six year old, the first time he saw his father cry. He had been too young to understand that his little brother Peter Field had died. The same happened two years later when his parents lost Peter Jefferson Jr. the second.
Peter Jefferson looked up at his oldest son out of red-rimmed eyes and started crying anew. "She left us, son," he sobbed, "She left us." It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out who he was talking about.
"What? Why? Where did she go? Why?" Thomas's voice was getting higher and more frantic with every question and he was on the verge of tears. "Dad, Dad, I'm gonna call my boyfriend, okay? I'll see if he can come over."
Alex picked up immediately. "Thomas, what's wrong? I'm coming back to your place right now because I can hear your breathing and I know that you're gonna start crying. Hold tight, I love you," he garbled out before hanging up.
Mere seconds later, the doorbell rang. Thomas opened it and found a red-faced and panting Alex at the door. "Came as soon as I heard," he huffed. Thomas let out a wet laugh.
"Thank you for coming," he choked out before breaking down. Alex just wrapped his arms around his boyfriend and just stood there, holding him.
"It's going to be alright, just let it all out. We'll make it through this, I swear we'll be okay. Shh, it's alright to cry, let's just get it all out of your system just now, yeah? Shh, I'm here, I'm here," Alex soothed.
"Now, how about we go inside and sit down?"
~
"Hello Mr Jefferson, this is not how I envisioned us meeting, but it's a pleasure anyway. I'm Alexander Hamilton, Thomas's boyfriend. I hope to get to know you better in the future under better circumstances," Alex introduced himself, sticking out a hand which Mr Jefferson shook.
Peter smiled a tiny bit. "Please Alexander, call me Peter," he replied. Alex flinched and his smile faltered a little for a moment, but then it was back in place as brilliant as ever.
Thomas sat down, pulling his boyfriend into his lap and rocking him as though Alex was the one in need of comfort. "So, I know that this technically has nothing to do with me, but as the person least clouded by emotions, I think I should take lead. Do you mind?" Alex questioned.
Peter shook his head and sat down in his armchair. "Not at all. You're a smart man, Mr Hamilton, and you're the least emotionally attached person to the issue in question, so I have no issue with you leading on this interview," he said, settling back.
Alex sat up straight on Thomas's lap and reached into his backpack that he'd totally always had to pull out his laptop. "Ok, what happened? I mean, it must be pretty big for Thomas to have called me almost directly after we parted," he explained, already ready to take notes to analyse later.
"So, ever since we lost two of our boys in infancy to yellow fever-" Again, Alex flinched for seemingly no reason "-Jane and I have been, struggling, with our marriage. We managed to get ourselves together for a while, for the kids, you know.
"We went to counselling, tried couples therapy, even took breaks from each other when things got too much. But, ever since Jane Jr. moved out to go to college we've been struggling even more.
"Thomas and Mary are really too young to leave by themselves with the younger kids, especially Liz and Mart who are going through an, ah, rebellious stage, so we never had any alone time. I guess that it's taken its toll because now she's gone, and I don't think she's coming back," Peter closed up, leaning back in his chair with a ragged breath.
Alex continued writing in notes for a few moments after Thomas's father had stopped speaking, Thomas cradling him close to his body. "Thank you for your statement, Mr Jefferson. Is there anyway your eldest daughter could come home until we sort out everything here? I'm sure you'd feel more at ease knowing that the children were being cared for," Alex prompted.
Peter nodded, reaching for his phone. "Yeah, I'll call her and ask her to come home for a week or two, just until I can get in contact with my wife and sort out this mess. Thomas, son, I'm so sorry that you had to find out the way. I'll make it up to you, but for now, why don't you go stay at Alexander's for a while? If you'd rather stay here, though, I totally get that."
Thomas just held Alex tighter in response and Alex nodded. "Do you want us to go and pack and maybe explain to Elizabeth and Martha what's happening? I don't want to emotionally scar Lucy or the twins quite yet, but I think the older two could handle it," he suggested quietly.
Peter just nodded, already speaking to Jane. Alex stood up, tugging on Thomas's hand. "C'mom Tom, let's get you ready to go, yeah?" Alex coaxed, pulling him to standing. Thomas took the lead and led him towards the stairs and, consequently, his room.
At the top of the stairs, two small faces peered through the banisters. "Tommy," one of them lisped. "Tommy, where's Momma?" Thomas stopped short.
"Anna, Randolph, how much did you hear?" he asked, his voice quiet and gentle. The girl, Anna, shook her head.
"Nothing, but where did she go?" The twins were insistent, Alex would give them that. "Thomas! I want Momma, where's Momma?" The small child's voice was rising towards tantrum level.
Alex kneeled down in front of her. "Hey, Anna, right? Use your inside voice and be nice and calm, then we'll be nice and calm and explain everything to you, do you understand?" he checked, his voice soothing, but mild.
Thomas was about to say that he didn't think that would make her calm down, when Anna stopped yelling and looked at Alex docilely. Alex smiled. "Now, isn't it better when you don't yell?" he asked, cocking his head a little.
Anna nodded and put her thumb in her mouth. Alex smiled at the youngest Jeffersons. "So, your mom has gone away and she might not be back for a long time, but I swear, she loves you and your brothers and sisters and her leaving is in no way any of your fault. Thing's have been hard and she needs a time out, maybe for a few months, maybe for a few years, maybe even forever, but she will miss you guys every single day, I promise," he explained kindly.
"But why did Mommy go in the first place?" Randolph piped up for the first time. Alex hesitated and looked towards Thomas.
"Your parents were going through a lot of stuff," he started carefully. "And, do you guys ever need time alone when you fight? Yeah? That's what happened between your mommy and your daddy."
"But why are they fighting? Don't they love each other anymore?" Anna asked this time, tears starting to fill her large eyes. Alex shook his head and held out his arms. Anna climbed into his lap with a sniffle.
"Sometimes, no matter how much you love someone, things happen and you still love that person just as much, but you have to leave them because it's what's best for them and your kids and you just want to protect your family. Sometimes, you want to stay, but everything's already changed and you can't fix it yet because you don't have a solution," Alex said earnestly.
"Are you crying, mister?" Anna asked. It was easy to tell that she was the more inquisitive of the two. Alex swiped at his eyes quickly and forced a smile.
"No, I'm not crying, my eyes are just peeing," he covered up lightly. Anna and Randolph burst into nearly identical peals of laughter.
"You're funny, mister. I like you," Randolph said quietly and decisively. Alex smiled at the young boy.
"Thank you. I like you too, Randolph," he replied, bowing his head slightly. "And you, Anna. You both seem very nice and I look forward to getting to know you both."
Thomas smiled at the sight of his boyfriend and his siblings getting along so well.
~
Ok, so, hey guys! It's been a while.
I'll be honest with you. I love this story, and I'm not giving up on it any time soon, but I can't promise that updates will be regular or frequent.
I'm sorry. I was really busy last week because I had two tests and I was super nervous for them. But other than that, I have no excuses for not updating, and I sincerely apologise.
I'm really grateful to all of you who read this, because without you guys I would have quit a long time ago, and I'm glad that I didn't because this book is something I'm really proud of.
Also, we're going to look into some of Alex's issues and more deeply at his past. I know I touched on it before Alex and Thomas even got together, but I'm gonna make a more thorough version of his backstory.
Signing off now, see you in the next update.