Jade
"Hey hey hey, Princes Perrie," I whispered in Perrie's ear, leaning over to her. She grumbled. I moved some hair from her face and peppered little kisses across one side of her face. A large smile spread across it and her eyes blinked open. "Hwi mama," she mumbled, stretching her arms and legs out. "Hi munchkin, we're at the hotel now so we've just get to get in, booked and upstairs. Do you think your little, tired legs can handle that?" I giggled, rubbing her leg. she giggled and nodded. "W-where Cwarter?" she fumbled, taking off her seatbelt. "He's at his house bubba, out you get," I kissed her cheek one last time before climbing out of the car myself. I opened up the boot and got out our back.
"Mama," Perrie called for me. I walked round to her side. "What's up munchkin?" I smiled, looking at her. She stood up and I noticed her pull up had leaked a fair bit down her legs. "Oh bub," I sighed- I hadn't even considered that. "I-I no go in dere," she cried, sitting back down but looking towards the lit entrance of the hotel. It was dark outside though. I quickly took off my coat and handed it her. It was a long one that went to just over the knee. She smiled and put it on."Good girl, the quicker we get in, the quicker we can get you cleaned up," I smiled, kissing her temple.
--
They had a small room with a double bed only which is perfectly fine. As soon as we walked through the door to our bedroom, Perrie flopped headfirst on to the bed and groaned loudly. I chuckled, laid the bags down and sat flopped backwards next to her on the bed. She giggled and turned her head to look at me. I looked back at her and pulled a funny face. SHe turned her head the other way and I decided to gently run my fingers across her scalp.
We stayed there for a few minutes, just enjoying each others company until she spoke up- "Mama?" She mumbled. "Yeah bub?" I replied quietly, moving my hand from her head to her waist and shuffling closer to her. "I wove woo," she smiled, lopping her fingers with mine. I giggled and kissed her cheek. "I love you too princess." After a couple more minutes, I sat up and stretched out- "let's get you cleaned up, do you fancy a quick shower? I'll come in with you," I said to her, stroking her back. "Mummy no wan dat," she whispered, sadly. I sighed and pulled her up. "Let's just go in the shower my lovely," I didn't want to address the mummy situation right now.She whimpered but allowed me to undress her then undress myself before we climbed under the nice, warm water. She whimpered as I tried to wash her body and moved my hands away sadly.
"Princess," I pouted, looking at her sadly. "N-no mwummy won't want woo to cwean me," she whispered, avoiding eye contact. "No baby, mummy won't mind. We've been over this baba. She wants me to help you as much as possible because we all know you're just a little baby!" I gasped, smiling. I tried to add a little light to the situation but she was over tired, sad and just not feeling it. I pulled her into a hug and she thankfully accepted it.
"Tell me baby, do you want me to clean you? I won't if you don't want me to. Don't think about mummy just yourself," I whispered in her ear. "I do wan woo mama," she nodded, pulling away. "Good, let's do it then," I picked up the scrunchy again and made sure between her legs and her private areas were clean then quickly cleaned myself.
---When I had finally gotten my sweet angel in bed, she practically slept on top of me. It was cute to see but her drooling wasn't cute to feel on my chest. To be honest, I'm not surprised she's drooling as she always has her bottle as she goes to sleep but I forgot to pack it and we didn't have milk at the hotel room. We had a microwave but it didn't do much good without the bottle and milk.
Obviously if Leigh was here, Perrie could have had some of her special milk before sleep but Leigh isn't here. I forgive Leigh, I do. I think she needs some professional help which she didn't receive at the time of her parents passing. Really, I'm proud she's finally accepting the fact they're really gone and isn't living in her fantasy world of 'they'll appear behind the door any minute now'. Not to sound harsh of course, she's the love of my life and it pains me to see her hurting but when after almost 7 years, she still hasn't realised it- it gets hard to deal with. It's been a slow process but I'm praying now she's understanding it will get a little easier. Maybe not for us straight away, but for her? I'm not sure. Either way, I'm willing to help any way I can.
Holding Perrie close to me, I realised I'd have to plan something for us to do tomorrow. We won't be going home tomorrow as I know Perrie won't be mentally ready for it and right now, if Leigh is sorry and I've forgiven her- it's Perrie we are waiting on. I'm not saying she needs to be rushed at all. If she wants a week away, we can have a week away. I don't mind. As long as I know Leigh is okay at home with Brooklyn then I feel more than comfortable staying away with Perrie for as long as she needs. I thought maybe I could take Perrie to the aquarium. She hasn't been before (at least not with us) and I know they've just added a new attraction to do with pirates and also under water dinosaurs. I know she's developing this new cute obsession with Dinosaurs which Leigh and I found super cute.
Last week, we all decided to have a lie in as my mum was babysitting baby Brooklyn and around 11am, a little Perrie crawled into our bed pretending she was a dinosaur. I was already awake, just holding Leigh and just trying to get a few more minutes of peace as I knew Perrie was awake, looking at the baby monitor. I giggled, feeling the little imprints of Perrie's fingers in my back, as my baby pretended she was preparing her prey. The next thing I know, I heard a big, almighty rawr escape from her- startling Leigh half to death. I chuckled, calmed Leigh down then took my tiny dinosaur captive as the tickle monster as she struggled against me.
I picked up my phone and booked us two tickets for the aquarium at noon the next day. It wasn't far from here, only a half hour drive and to say it was already late and she'd only just gone to sleep. I'm hoping we can sleep in and then go get breakfast and leave. I put my phone on charge, after texting Leigh-Anne a goodnight text then settled myself into a more comfortable position. I held Perrie close to me, planted a gentle kiss on her head and swayed into a deep sleep.