Excuse any mistakes!
Luna Hogan
"Tell me more about him." I sat across the table from Miss Sade. We haven't spoken in a while and I needed some of her amazing food. She wanted me to shed light on the whole Zae situation but I wasn't feeling it.
"There's nothing to tell. I know in this world, everything or anyone is temporary. He was just that, our relationship was just a phase."
"Your eyes tell me a different story." She threw me a grin. I sighed looking down at my arm. "The first step in forgiveness is to let go."
"Who said anything about forgiveness?"
"Luna." Her voice was in a warning tone. "Loving someone is the most dangerous thing a person can do. I think no matter your past, you're so beautiful inside and out. You deserve someone who will bring you the purest joy in the world. Ask yourself this, if you could go back to that day and unmeet him, would you?"
With that being said, she stood from her seat and kissed my cheek before walking away. My body got warm at her words. The answer would be no because he's taught me a lesson and helped me grow in many ways. Every moment from good and bad flashed in my mind. But the best of our memories flooded the worst ones.
"Use your napkin baby." I reminded Lavender as she went to wipe her hands on her pants. She gave me an innocent smile and grabbed the napkin.
"The search for 18 year old Quincy Valentine continues. He was last seen leaving his school, possibly heading home. No one has heard anything from the star quarterback of McKinney High. If you have any information about this disappearance, please contact-"
Valentine. Valentine. Valentine. The name stuck out like a sore thumb. I tapped my fingers across the table trying to figure out where I recently heard that name. I halted all movement when I finally remembered. The detective working on Lavender's case was Quincy's father.
"Fuck." Worrying about the situation wasn't going to make things better but I knew that this shit needed to get handled immediately. If it wasn't one thing, it was another. Taking a deep breath I pushed all negative thoughts in the back of my head and continued eating my food.
"This is good mommy." Lavender said with a stuffed mouth.
"I can tell you like it."
"Sorry, I'm late." Noah walked into the restaurant. He turned to Lavender, kissing her cheek. "Hey, pretty girl. Umm, you okay?"
"I'm fine."
"You look like someone killed your puppy." He paused for a while. "Or cat."
I laughed. "My cat is fine. I'm just overthinking."
"About?"
I gave him the rundown about what happened in the past and what recently just happened a couple of days ago. He looked shocked and upset by some things but kept it cool.
"There's a lot of hurt in the mix. Y'all can't keep avoiding the conversation. You and I both know, that it will come soon." This whole situation was becoming tiring at this point.
"I can't bring myself to talk with him without wanting to rip his face off."
"That's completely normal... for you." He joked. "Seriously, it doesn't have to happen right away but the sooner the better."
"I'll think about it."
I don't think people realize how hard it is to talk about my feelings and explain what's going through my head when I don't even know myself. Sometimes I can't find the right words to assemble and speak freely about.
"You're too stubborn and scared to admit that you truly love him because the last time you did, he broke your trust. We've all been there, I get it. You just have to give yourself another try."
I closed my eyes thinking about how the conversation between us would go. I don't think he understands what he has done.
"He's so disrespectful, I hate him."
"No, you don't. It doesn't have to be right now but when the time comes, you got this." He squeezed my hand giving me a small smile.
I have been dealing with a lot of shit over the years, but this past month has taken the cake. I developed a mental block towards pain and happiness in order to never end up broken again. I thought it was best to close up and ignore every single thing about him, now it might be best to try and open up again.
_______
"I hate this." I groaned leaning over the toilet as Karsyn held my hair. Another side effect of the medicine for my headaches was nausea.
"As long as it makes the pain go away, that's all that matters."
I punched him in the stomach. "Shut up."
"You gone get enough of putting your hands on me. I'm still in pain and I'll take your ass to court."
I laughed and made my way over to the sink. My stomach was in cramps making it hard for me to stand straight. This new medicine they prescribed me was a bitch. Yes, it was more effective but had way too many complicated effects.
"Let's go smoke." I went to check on Lavender and made sure she was still asleep before we slipped out on the balcony. He gave me the blunt to light and hit first. My nerves began to calm once I took that first pull. I leaned back in the chair staring at the sky.
"Just thinking about that day sends chills up my spine. I didn't think I would make it out alive." I randomly expressed passing him the blunt.
"I remember that day. The police had the whole block shut off. I'm glad you made it through. I wouldn't have met you and we wouldn't have Lavender if you didn't."
I chuckled. "You don't even like me for real."
"You just so use to muthafuckas doing you wrong, that you don't notice when people genuinely care about yo ass."
"And you're one of these people?"
"Hell yeah! You have been fucked up to me before but I still love you. Not because you're the mother of my child but because behind all of that anger, you're an amazing person." He exhaled releasing the smoke through his nose.
"I'm not angry."
"Pshh." He jerked his head to the side. "You mad at the damn world. I know you been through some shit, hell I have too. But you can't blame everyone for all the bad things that have taken place in your life. It doesn't work like that."
"You think I want to be this way? The world made me this way, so fuck it."
"But it's your job to correct it. You have a daughter who looks up to you now. Do you want her to grow up being this miserable person?"
"No."
"Then fix the problems in your life that continue to fuck with you. Starting with your ex."
I rolled my eyes. "Why does everyone keep bringing him up?"
"He's part of the reason why you're so angry."
"You just sound stupid."
"My point taken. Fix the problem, Luna."
Zae Berlinger
"You about to get in trouble." Zach pointed out while laughing. He stood at the door with a goofy ass smile plastered all over his face.
"Bro, what are you talking about? I'm grown as hell. Do it look like I can get in trouble? Get out."
He smacked his lips. "We'll see."
When he walked out, my mom entered with a hard glare on her face. I sat up looking around the room as to why she was mugging me so damn hard.
"I'm so disappointed in you."
"Ma, I haven't-
"I'm not finished!" She snapped. "Now, it's my turn to speak and you will listen. Do I make myself clear?"
I couldn't even get a good sentence out before she cut my chances off to speak and now she's taking the floor. I sighed letting her do what she had to do.
"Yes."
"I have raised you and your brother to value and respect women. I may have not liked or been the best towards Luna in the past but she grew on me. She helped this family more times than I can count. That woman is something truly amazing and for you to talk down on her like she did something wrong is UNACCEPTABLE."
I knew I fucked up that day at her house but I was pissed. My anger was overclouded by everything and I wanted her to feel that. I realized that I should've worried about my sister and her safety first before anything.
"You're right." I shook my head.
"Your sister was physically harmed that night. She was put into a position that changed her life forever. We didn't know what that is like for her. She called the only person she could trust in the world to help and never judge her as someone did. Violence is never the answer but when it comes to my children, I'll go to war. I will kill someone myself if I have to."
"I know ma. It was never my attention on making her situation worse. I was just mad."
"Mad my ass." She scoffed. "You didn't have a right to be mad in this situation, especially at someone who helped. What she did wasn't right but it was necessary. We will never speak of this again. You will apologize to that lovely woman and make things right. Got it?"
"Yeah." I tucked in my bottom lip to refrain myself from speaking anymore.
"Do I look like one of your little homeboys? Speak to me like you have some damn sense."
"Yes ma'am, I understand you loud and clear."
She waved her hand in the air. "You're dismissed."
"Umm, this is my room."
"Are you back talking me?" Her hand went on her hip waiting for my answer. She wanted me to say something stupid, so she could slap my ass.
"No."
"That's what I thought." She stood there for a moment before walking out and closing the door. I sat in shock at what just took place. My mom wasn't the type to curse or even become upset with me. That's how I knew I needed to apologize and fix my mistakes.
The door creaked open. "I told you."
"Get the fuck on." Zach laughed catching the pillow I threw at him. I shook my head thinking of a way to finally have a respectable conversation with Luna.
__________________
Just a little something something...
The next chapter will be a blast from the past. It will explain what happened between the two love birds and why Luna is so upset with Zae. Get ready for a misconstrued love cycle.
Let me know what y'all think🤔
Luna?
Sade?
Noah?
Karsyn?
Bernice?
Zae?
Don't forget to Vote/Comment & Share🖤💙