"And you want to beat the eggs in a circular motion, but make sure you don't over beat it.."
I stared at the hotel television in boredom as I watched this damn cooking show. Nothing else was on so.. this is what I had to pass time.
After the club, they all went out to get food but I decided my babysitting duties was done for. So, I came back to the hotel and called Robs. No answer.
I figured I had to tell her saweetie tried to kiss me, only because I knew I didn't do shit wrong. I was just happy I didn't get drunk because my reaction might've been delayed, just as it had been with Naomi.
She'd understand, right?
I huffed and slid my hands into my hoodie pockets just as a knock rang at my door. "Finally." I mumbled and raised up. I've been waiting for my hot wings and fries for damn near forty minutes now. I pulled the door open and looked down as I flipped through the bills in my wallet. "Twenty is enough for a tip yeah?"
"I have my own money, thank you." I snapped my head up and saw Robyn standing at the door with a soft smile. "Hi." She whispered and I slowly put my wallet away, stunned to silence. "Can I come in or.."
"Oh- yea yea." I quickly stepped to the side and let her walk in before I closed the door. "When'd you get here?"
"Just now." She said and looked around the room, eyes landing on the tv. "Cooking?" She questioned and looked at me with one raised eyebrow. I shrugged in response and a sigh left her lips as she walked up to me. "What's happening?" She whispered, her hands raising to slowly push the hood off of my head before resting her hands on the side of my neck.
"You tell me." Her eyes closed and I slid my arms around her slightly when she leaned forward to rest her head on my chest.
Her head lowered slightly, right over my heart, and I felt her breathing even out. "Hug me like you mean it.. please?" I raised my arms to drape over her shoulders before pulling her closer. She hummed and hugged me tighter. "I can be dealing with the most fucked up shit in my head but when you hold me, it just all goes away, you know that?"
I pressed a kiss to the top of her head before resting my chin on her head. I didn't really know what to say or how to respond to her words so I just held her closer. "Wanna lay with me?" I whispered and she nodded so I walked us over to the bed and laid down, her fully laying on top of me between my legs.
We laid there for a moment and I felt everything start to fall back into place. Not that it was out of place but things did get a bit shaken up. Perfect time for me to let the truth out because it was no use in me hiding it, you know? "So, I went out tonight-"
"Hang on." She said with a huff when her phone went off. "It's Jen, we're working on Fenty Skin so I gotta.." I nodded in understanding as she climbed off of me and answered the phone. "Jenniferrr, talk to me boo."
I watched her walk out of the hotel room as I stretched my arms before pulling up my hoodie again. Now that she was here, I felt the stress leave my shoulders and I honestly was ready to knock out.
But I wouldn't, not until I told her about the whole situation.
I rolled onto my stomach and groaned when I cracked my back, the doors reopening. I glanced up and saw her holding the plates (most likely from the room service.) "Yesss," I cheered and she smiled softly while carrying it over. "You don't know how hungry I am."
"Yeah?" She whispered and when I nodded, her hands dropped quickly. The plates.. falling from her hands. "Okay. Eat it off the floor like the dog you are." My eyes widened when she snatched her purse and keys from the desk side table. Woah.. what?
I sat up quickly and slid my feet into the shoes. "Babe what? What happened now?" I rushed after her as she slid out of the door within a second. "Robyn," I grabbed her arm and pulled her back. "What happened?" She turned to me and I saw fire in her eyes as she shoved her phone against my chest.
"You tell me."
I looked down at the phone with furrowed eyebrows.
@TheShadeRoom: #TSRReactionz Oop... Two for the price of one. #Y/n and #Saweetie were trending for their little grinding session on stage tonight at their Miami concert, y'all ready for another sip? They were spotted at a club getting too close and personal for #Y/n to be MARRIED to none other than bad gal #Rihanna What y'all think #roommates? Drop your reactions below.
The phone was snatched out of my hands and I raised my head when she started back down the hall. "Robyn it's- that's not how it happened. I swear that's not how it went down." I kept trying to grab for her but she kept pulling out of my grip with ease. "Robyn stop."
I grabbed her from behind and turned to press her against the wall, my hands holding her back from maneuvering around me. "Look me in my eyes." Her chest was rising and falling at a quick pace, short angry bursts of air leaving her nose. "Look at me and tell me you think I'm that person.."
Her head shook. "I don't know anymore! Look at the phone, Y/n. That's not photoshopped!"
I shook my head. "Not the phone. Look at me, Robyn." Her blinking slowly started to speed up but she finally lost that glazed over look in her eyes and focused on me. "Good. She tried to kiss me Rob, but I didn't let her. You of all people should know that an angle of a picture can twist everything up."
She looked down and shook her head. "Why would she feel comfortable trying to kiss you? Y'all been on tour for how many months? Why is she just now feeling like she can advance?" My eyebrows furrowed, lowkey feeling victim blamed right now. "You had to give her some sort of reason."
"What?" I mumbled and dropped my hands. "That doesn't make any sense- think about the past three and a half years. I cheated not once. I didn't give a 'reason' to anyone. This isn't any different than the shit with Naomi."
"It is different!" I stood stunned. Who the hell... It felt like I was being thrown into a worm hole and sent right back to two thousand sixteen. This wasn't my wife right now. "It is.. she's.." I raised my hands to cup her face and she quickly pulled back. "Don't touch me."
"Robyn, what is going on?" I whispered, watching her have some sort of internal conflict of her own. I wish I could read her mind. She closed her eyes for a second and took in a deep breath through her nose. "Talk to me baby, what do you need?"
She reopened her eyes. "To go home." I shook my head slightly in confused. "I need to sleep in my own bed and.. I just need to leave."
Man what the fuck was going on? She was like a whole new person right now, possibly worse than three years ago. It was like, no matter what I said or did, she processed something totally different. What was I suppose to do?
I cautiously raised my hands and rubbed her shoulders, feeling her slightly tense up. But why? It was me. "Rob, please tell me what to do here. I'm telling you I've never cheated and.. I love you. Please help me out."
"I just need to go home alone and think." She moved my hands and I slowly followed after her when she started down the hall. "Y/n." She stopped, not turning back. "This isn't one of those 'do the opposite of what I say things.' Stop following me. I need to think alone."
"I don't want you to leave by yourself at this time. Especially not mad at me." Her head turned and I frowned at her welled up eyes. "You're my wife." I added and her head dropped. "Please?"
She eventually walked back to me, her head falling on my chest like the first time she got here. Difference was, I automatically pulled her closer to me. "I'll call you when I land." She whispered into my hoodie.
"Please do." I mumbled, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "I need us to be okay. And don't forget, no text, I want a call."
She nodded. "I'll call you."
-
She didn't.
I walked back and forth across the tour bus as I stared down at my phone. It's been over ten hours. Nothing.
I wanted to give her the space she needed to think, like she said, but I couldn't help but be worried. My mind immediately went to the worse.
The plane crashed.. her driver was sent off a cliff.. she was kidnapped and being help for ransom.
Okay that last one may seem a bit Hollywood film but shit, what else was I suppose to think?!
"Y/nn?"
I hummed absentmindedly, still scrolling on my phone for signs she was okay. I usually followed the 'Rihanna update' pages to screenshot good pictures I didn't get to see her in. But now, I was scrolling to see if they got her pictured in LA.
"Y/nn.. can you hear me?"
The words went in one ear and out of the other as I kept scrolling until I got a call. My hopes skyrocketed.. then plummeted. It was Melissa. "Hey, give me one second." I answered, the phone to my ear before I pulled it back to connect my AirPods. "Okay, I'm back."
I bet she was about to question everything. No doubt Robs had to have went to her and spilled it all. "Hey boo, what you up to?" I sat down on the couch and continued scrolling on Instagram for anything.
"Just on the bus, heading to one if the Carolinas. Forgot which one." Okay, enough small talk, Melissa. Just give it to me please.. pause. "What's up with you?"
"Nothing.." she sighed and I paused my scrolling for a second. "Robs just cancelled our brunch so now I'm bored and Dante is back in Ohio for his games." My eyebrows furrowed. Wait.. she cancelled their brunch? She never cancels their brunch.
But, it also sounds like she doesn't know anything. "She cancelled? Damn, why?" I tested the waters and I could typically tell when Melissa was lying.
"Sis I don't know. She just said she was busy and I don't have any other friends." I snorted. We were in the same damn boat. "So that's why I called you. You're my bored bud."
"Mel?" She hummed. "Don't ever say bud again." As she laughed softly, I looked back down at my phone to refresh the page. This was bad man.. if she was cancelling brunch's and not calling me, she had to me down bad. I was just glad she called Melissa, that let me know she was okay.
But.. she had to be going through it if she didn't even tell her what happened. I couldn't shake the image of her just overthinking herself in bed or something of that nature, me not being there to comfort whatever she was going through. It sucked.
I looked down at the refreshed page and saw a new post. Perfect.
@badgalupdates: Rihanna watching the Lakers vs. Trail Blazers with international business partner Hassan Jameel and friends. Nov. 3rd '19.
I stared at the picture for what felt like ten minutes as Mel talked. What? Here I thought she was 'down bad' but she was here.. at a lakers game? She didn't call for a Lakers game? She cancelled brunch with her best friend for a Lakers game? With.. him? With the 'twenty four seven cap wearing' nigga?
Wow.
"Anyways, I need you to stop getting on the shade room. I know you not doing no dumb shit but girl.. remember there are camera everywhere." I shook my head slightly. How is it that Mel trusts me more over my own wife? Usually it's the best friend that's like 'don't trust that nigga' and the girl is trying to prove his worth. It was the complete opposite.
"Right.." I closed the app and sighed heavily. "Mel I gotta go.. tour stuff, you know?" I heard her whine and I chuckled under my breath. "I know I know, I'm your favorite."
"No nigga, I'm just bored.. I think I'll just get high." That sounded something great right now. Sheesh. "But okay, talk to you later."
"Love you byyeee." Once I hung up, I quickly called Robyn. There was no use in me giving her 'space' if she wasn't even taking the time to think like I thought she was.
It took a long minute, the ringing accompanied with silence before she picked up. "Hey." She answered nonchalantly, the sound of the game in the background was faint but now that I knew where she was, I easily picked up on it.
"Hey?" I questioned with a frown. "That's all? A hey.." I huffed and leaned back on the seats. "I've been sitting here stressing thinking something was wrong."
"Oh I was suppose to call you." She mumbled, her lips smacking. "Sorry, I forgot." She forgot. I raised my hand to pinch the bridge of my nose, all my confusion and overthinking making my damn head hurt. "I'm fine though."
Man what the hell?
"We were suppose to talk about things, Rob. The way you left didn't have any resolution, we gotta figure out how to-" I stopped when I suddenly heard cheering.. her included. I blinked slowly in awe of how I was trying to figure things out and make sure we were good while she.. . "Babe, did you hear anything I just said?" I mumbled.
"What?" She questioned with a laugh. "Shut up, HJ- what did you say, Y/n? I couldn't hear you, LeBron just dunked on they asses."
I nodded slightly, my expression probably showing how fed up I was. "What was the point of saying I do if you're gonna-"
"Don't drink my shit Hassan, go buy your own with your rich ass." I huffed. "You gotta speak your babe, I can barely hear you."
No, you just wasn't interested in anything I had to say. Forget it man.. "Nothing," I said with a fake smile, speaking 'louder' for her. "Have fun." Then I hung up. I wasn't mad she was out, not even with Hassan because I wasn't worried about him.
But why was she being so different?
"Y/n?" I looked up and saw Saweetie walking in with a plate, a sad smile on her face. "I've been calling you but you seem stressed so I.." I grinned when she outstretched her hands with the plate. "I made you a sandwich."
I grabbed it and chuckled slightly at the side of hot Cheetos on the side. This girl loved her hot Cheetos. "Thank you." I lifted half of the sandwich and held it up for her. "Eat with me." She nodded and sat on the seat across from me but it was a tour bus so, it was barely a step across.
I took a bite of the ham and cheese sandwich with a hum. "You okay?" I looked up and saw her worried eyes. "I know the pictures are.. everywhere."
"Yeah um.." I shook my head and picked at the crust on he bread. "I don't know. I'm not worried about the public, they'll always have something to say or make up but," I shrugged again. "I don't know."
She took a bite herself and tapped her feet softly. "I'm sorry." She muttered lowly. "I'm not the type to be a home wrecker, never have been. I think I was just feeling so sad and fed up in the moment that I.. I just wanted to feel something else. I'm sorry I put you in the middle of my own issues."
I waved my hand. "Don't worry about it. I'm the last person to judge you." She gave me a grateful smile as we both fell into silence, just eating the sandwich.
When I looked up, I saw her staring down at her plate with a frown, and that's when Melissa's words came into my head. "Come on," her head popped up as I dusted off my hands before raising off of the couch. "Come on." I grabbed her arm and pulled her up before dragging her to the mini kitchen.
"Where?" I held up my finger as I quickly jumped into my bunk and grabbed my backpack. "What are you doing?"
"I am.." I pulled out a box of brownie mix and my baggie of trees. "Gonna get high and make brownies, you down?" Her eyes lit up and I walked down the aisle of the bunks to check in with everyone to make sure they would be cool with the weed smoke since it was pretty late
"I've never hit a pipe before." I gave her a shocked look as I packed the weed into a bowl before pulling out the ingredients for the brownies.
"For real? Bowls get you high faster but blunts last longer so.. it's a pro-con situation." After I made sure it was full, no holes, I grabbed my lighter and held the mouthpiece to my lips. I saw her watching in intrigue as the smoke traveled through the glass chamber and into my mouth. I inhaled deeply and held it for a few seconds before exhaling slowly.
"That's a hella smoke bro." She mumbled with wide eyes. I chuckled and turned it to her. "So I just.." I nodded, already feeling the slight fuzz feeling travel through my head. I watched her light the bowl and inhale as deeply as I had. Welp- A rough cough left her lips and I chuckled as the smoke rushed out of her lungs. "Shit- I'm dying." I patted her back in amusement. This girl..
"Start slow." I said and urged her to try again as I turned and started cracking eggs into the bowl with the brownie mix. "Don't inhale too much." A scratchy 'okay' left her lips and I watched her take a smaller inhale before leaning her head back and blowing the smoke into the air. "There you go! Now it's blunt time, you know how to roll right?"
"Well duh." I pushed my stuff over to her and focused on mixing the brownie batter as she rolled. "Can I borrow your ear?" She started and I nodded her to continue. "So, Quavo and I are taking a 'break' or whatever because I just didn't feel happy." I nodded again. "Do you think I should forgive him? For cheating?"
I hummed and grabbed the greased pan. "Honestly it's all on how you feel, you know?" I accepted the lit blunt once she handed it to me as I continued. "You know your extent of love for him, you know how he treats you other than what happened. Like, when I was with my ex, I was someone she should've left."
"You was a dog?" She questioned with a smirk and I sighed before nodding. "Like, how bad?"
I leaned against the counter and took a hit of the blunt. Question should be was I ever good. "Terrible. I'd sleep with the girls in her own sorority. The ones that was suppose to be her sisters and they all lied to her face, including me. And I wasn't the greatest to her even when I wasn't cheating so, I'm the person you wanna stay away from." Her eyebrows raised. "I was the person."
She hummed and nodded softly. "So, you think that if this is his first mistake and he treats me well otherwise, I could forgive him?"
"You have to answer that question yourself. Ask yourself, could you trust him again? Or will your forever be tormented by the idea of him with another woman? Put your heart first." I saw her nod, seemingly going deep into her thoughts so I finished dropping the batter into the pan.
When I slid it into the oven, I relit the blunt and handed it to her. "I don't know if I could." She whispered and took a pull with an unfocused exhale. "I just don't know."
"That's what the break is for. Figure it out and then move forward. Don't jump into anything, take your time." I lifted my hand and playfully bopped her nose with some of the brownie mix on my fingers. "You'll be good, SweetTarts."
She scowled and wiped her nose. "Why would you do that?" I chuckled and quickly jumped back when she rubbed the batter smeared bowl and tried to get me back. "Don't run pussy!" She called out, chasing me in the little vicinity of the bus.
It was pure fun, a moment for both of us to break from reality. Just.. innocent happiness. It's what I needed the most right now. And I knew it was what she needed to.
___
Yeaaaa this chapter was fun, wasn't it?
speaking of the Lakers, congrats to them. im forever a clippers baby but.. y'all did ya thang.