"It isn't today, but one day I'll play my last game... and you better believe I'm gonna finish that one with a smile!"
Sakusa trudges down the hallway alone, lost in thought as he thinks over Iizuna's words, thinking about his ideal last game. What would be his ideal ending?
Perhaps... going out with a smile, ending on a victory. Would either be necessary? Would having both be his ideal?
All good things come to an end. There are many things in your life that you can control, but there are equally as many things you can't control. As long as you do everything to the best of your abilities, then you'll be satisfied no matter what, you'll be able to live without regrets, right?
But Iizuna...
Iizuna did his best, he did everything he could. However, there was an accident, and everything came to an abrupt and unsatisfying end. Sometimes you're just... unlucky.
Luck is an interesting concept. You get far in life because you work hard, but also because you're lucky. There are people who are simply born lucky, and excel ahead of their peers. Sakusa subconsciously rubs his wrists as he thinks back to his last Interhigh.
"Wakatoshi-kun, how did you get so good?"
"...Because I got lucky."
Luck. Anyone could see it, and Sakusa knows it's true. Sakusa is one of the lucky ones. But surely, there will be a time when that luck runs out? Where his fate will boil down to preparation and circumstance?
What is the future that Sakusa is dreaming for?
"Hey."
Sakusa turns around at the sound of the voice, blinking in surprise as he straightens up and nods.
"Hey." He responds, turning around fully to face her as she approaches him.
Y/N fiddles with her fingers as she contemplates her words, glancing up at him as he watches her silently. After a moment, she sighs slightly as she smiles. "Your team played well."
Sakusa takes a few seconds to process her words as he nods again. "Of course."
Y/N shifts slightly as she tries to think about what to say next. What is there even to say in this situation? How did he do such a good job at making her feel better when she was in this situation?
"I'm not upset, if that's what you're concerned about." Sakusa says as she snaps out of her thoughts. "There's no reason for you to worry, I was just... unlucky this time."
"Yeah..." Y/N mutters. "Are'ya sure yer alright though...? You seemed deep in thought earlier."
"Ah, I was." Sakusa confirms as he frowns. "After the match, Iizuna-san said something and it got me thinking about my ideal last game... What would you consider to be ideal?"
"Me?" Y/N questions, tilting her head in surprise as Sakusa nods in confirmation. "Well... I was never really passionate or deeply invested in volleyball, so I can say for certain that I personally do not care much for victories or losses... I just think, as long as you do well and yer happy, then it's fine."
"Oh."
"Yeah, I know that for someone like Atsumu though, who lives and breathes volleyball, I'm sure that his ideal would be to end on an amazing win at the world stage or somethin'. I know he dreams about it now." Y/N smiles before faltering a little. '...I'm sure he dreams of a win, with Osamu by his side...'
"...I think that would be nice too." Sakusa mumbles. "Although, I don't find it particularly necessary."
"I don't either." Y/N chuckles. "Maybe I just found solace in accepting that sometimes things don't go your way."
"Yeah... How about you though?"
"Hm?"
"I don't mean volleyball. I want to know how you wish your future to be." Sakusa says as she blinks in surprise. "If you want to tell me, that is."
Y/N pauses slightly as she looks down and thinks. "I'm... not entirely sure." She breathes out. "Everyone dreams of happiness, I suppose it's the ultimate goal. We want to be happy with our circumstances, and achieve everything we wish for. Although, I suppose I don't need fireworks and celebrations to get to where I want to be."
Y/N smiles softly. "I guess... I just wanna take each day as they come, and do my best, maintaining the things important to me so I don't have any regrets later on, y'know? Perhaps I do dream big, but I don't need them. I think... I just wanna be able to feel happy, even without them."
Sakusa mulls over her words as he thinks over the events that unfolded through the day. From his first match to his last, from Iizuna's injury to Hinata's collapse. Many of the players here have their sights set on that final victory, to be the champions of the Spring Tournament. But what does he truly want?
He wants to take care, do things properly and carefully, to the best of his abilities. So that even if he doesn't make it to the grand finale he dreams of, even if his ending comes partway through his journey, even if his dreams get cut short...
No matter where or how it ends, he wants to be satisfied with everything, and to be able to smile and think; he really did his best, and he's satisfied.
Sakusa doesn't need victory. He just needs to do things right.
"How about you, Sakusa?" Y/N asks quietly after a moment as he glances at her. "D'ya know what you want?"
Sakusa gazes over her for a few moments as he nods ever so slightly. "I think I do... I think I know now."
Y/N smiles softly at him as she nods. "That's good."
Sakusa fiddles with his fingers before glancing at her again. "L/N-"
"N/N, we needa go, Coach is gettin' everyone on the bus." Osamu interrupts as they both glance at him.
"Ah, alright." Y/N nods. "Umm, I guess I'll see'ya later, Sakusa."
"...Yeah."
Y/N smiles sheepishly as she waves and walks over to Osamu who raises his eyebrow in confusion.
"...Am I interruptin' something?"
"Uhh..." Y/N trails off as she follows after Osamu. "Well..."
"Wait."
Y/N flinches in shock as Sakusa tugs the sleeve of her jacket, turning around as she looks up at him, eyes wide open from surprise.
"Thank you." Sakusa says simply as Y/N blinks in confusion, brain short-circuiting as she tries to understand what's happening.
"Ah- ye- um... uh?" Y/N stutters out as Osamu glances back and forth at the two of them, eyes wide open in shock.
After a few moments of her floundering, Sakusa smiles.
"I'll see you later."
Letting go of her jacket, Sakusa nods once more, smile still gracing his lips as he turns away, leaving the two Inarizaki students frozen in confusion.
After a while, Y/N and Osamu turn to each other as they try to process what just happened.
"Is- I... what?" Osamu mutters out as Y/N turns back to look down the hallway where Sakusa was earlier.
"I have no idea..."
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
On the bus back, Y/N's lucky enough to have been left alone, blankly staring out the window as she watches the Tokyo streets flash by. There's only two days left of the Spring Tournament, Semi-finals and Finals, and then she's back in Hyogo for the rest of her second year...
For the rest of their time together...
Shaking her head, Y/N sighs to herself as she relaxes into her seat, there's no need to think about such things. All good things come to an end, and she's not going to miss them that much.
Listening to Atsumu's soft snores, Y/N glances to the side and slaps her hand over her mouth, trying to stop herself from laughing.
Suna holds a black marker in his hand as he leans over his seat and draws on Atsumu's face, Osamu snickering beside him as Ojiro panics.
"Suna stop that!" Ojiro whisper yells as Suna shrugs.
"Why? Atsumu hasn't asked me to stop yet."
"That's coz he's sleepin'!"
"Is he? Sounds like that's his problem, not mine."
"Suna...!" Ojiro whispers as he stares at the back of Kita's head in fear.
"Relax~ What's the worst that can happen?"
"What's goin' on here?"
Suna promptly shuts up as he swivels back into his seat and pretends to sleep, even letting out fake snores to try and convince everyone. Facepalming, Ojiro sighs as he avoids eye contact with Kita, not wanting to be involved.
Kita looks over to Atsumu's sleeping face and all the markings drawn by Suna as he blinks in surprise.
"Didja draw on Atsumu's face, Suna?" Kita asks as Suna continues to fake snore.
"...It was Osamu." Suna mumbles out between snores as Osamu gasps in offence, flinching when Kita suddenly turns to him.
"...It was Gin." Osamu mutters as Kita turns to Ginjima, who's sleeping beside Suna.
Glancing at Atsumu's marked face again, Kita sighs as he chuckles and turns around. "Don't get too carried away."
Suna instantly 'wakes up' as he gasps in delight, before Kita instantly whips around and stares at him with dead eyes.
"Don't go over the top."
Sweat dropping, Suna nods stiffly as Kita turns away, sighing in relief as he puts his marker away and takes out his phone, posing with Osamu as they take pictures with Atsumu. Eventually caving, Ojiro also starts posing from behind as they take pictures together, choosing to immortalise this moment as Y/N sighs in exasperation and turns away, smiling.
She's totally not going to miss them, when their time together comes to an end.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
"Whatcha doin'?" Kagawa asks as looks over to Y/N who's currently engrossed on her laptop.
"I'm designing my website now, since I got some time I thought I should go right ahead." Y/N responds, not taking her eyes off the screen as Kagawa gasps.
"Ohh that's so cool! Is it going to be yer online store?"
"Yeah, and also a portfolio of sorts for my artworks." Y/N smiles, turning to look at Kagawa. "Y'know, there's a bunch of things I wanna do with my art in the future... So even though I'm super inexperienced now, I thought, why not just keep goin' ahead anyways? Doesn't hurt to charge forward~"
"...Depends on what kind of chargin' forward yer doin'." Kagawa chuckles as Y/N rolls her eyes and smiles.
"Yes yes I know."
The two second year managers fall into silence as they get back to doing their own thing, not wanting to bother the other as they remain silent. It's not that they don't like each other, far from it. It's just that sometimes, even if you spend a lot of time with someone, there's still a distance.
Y/N and Kagawa aren't close.
Getting hungry, Y/N quietly leaves her room as she ventures out on a journey to find some food. Walking past the second year boy's room, Y/N finds herself slowing down slightly as she hears their conversation through the door.
"It'll work, trust me!" Suna exclaims.
"No! I'm not gonna catfish people by pretendin' to be 'Samu!"
'Nope.' Y/N mentally deadpans as she speeds past the room, Suna might use his weird Y/N-senses and drag her into their conversation.
Making her way to the kitchen, Y/N sighs in contempt as she opens the fridge, peering around to find something convenient to eat. Hearing some rustling behind her, Y/N turns around to find Osamu munching on some convenience store onigiri. Making eye contact with her, Osamu shrugs.
"I got hungry."
"Ah."
"Yer not surprised?"
"I mean AH!" Y/N gasps in fake shock as she dramatically slaps her forehead. "I was so shocked I wasn't able to give an immediate reaction!"
"I was gonna offer an onigiri but... now I'm startin' to change my mind." Osamu deadpans as Y/N instantly reverts back to her neutral state.
"Forgive me, I was possessed by a ghost since my body is too weak and unable to fight back due to malnourishment." Y/N says solemnly as Osamu rolls his eyes and hands her two onigiris.
"Sure, yer welcome."
"Thanks." Y/N chuckles as she goes over to sit with him.
"So, Sakusa." Osamu begins as Y/N pauses slightly, before she resumes eating.
"What about him?" Y/N asks as Osamu shrugs.
"That's what I wanna know."
"Why are'ya actin' like Rintarou?" Y/N asks.
"I'm not, I'm just curious." Osamu deadpans. "I already bribed you with food, is that not enough?"
"Nah."
"Too bad, now spill."
Y/N sighs tiredly. "There's nothin' to spill, we're just friends."
"Mmm I love friendship." Osamu murmurs sarcastically.
"I'm serious." Y/N deadpans. "We're really just friends."
"I see..." Osamu trails off. "I kinda get why Suna's so invested in this now, I'm also waiting for drama to happen."
"Well sorry to disappoint, but nothin's probably gonna happen."
"Probably? You used to be certain."
"Shut it."
"Mmm friendship."
"Shut up!" Y/N laughs as Osamu chuckles.
"What were you two talkin' about before I got there? Sorry I interrupted by the way, but we kinda did needa go."
"Nah s'fine." Y/N waves him off half-heartedly. "I'm lowkey now really sure what we were talkin' about to be honest... Just about the future and what we wanna do, y'know? What's gonna make us happy."
Osamu nods slightly as he unwraps another onigiri. "What makes us happy, huh?"
"Yeah..." Y/N trails off, watching him carefully. "...Yer gonna needa say somethin' to Atsumu soon."
"I know."
"D'ya know when yer gonna?"
"Some time soon." Osamu shrugs. "It's really not that big of a deal, not to me anyway. He's gonna just hafta deal with it."
"That's true... s'not like he can stop you."
"Yeah, I just thought it'd be a weird time to bring it up now, since he's still on a volleyball high coz of the Spring Tournament." Osamu shrugs. "I want him to at least be able to enjoy the tournament in full before dropping the bomb on him."
Y/N smiles slightly at this. "Aww, yer bein' caring~"
"Ew no."
"Ew yes." Y/N chuckles. "I'm sure it'll be fine~ Atsumu's immature but he'll accept it eventually."
"I know." Osamu sighs. "I think you should be more worried about yerself though."
"Huh? Why?"
Osamu smirks at this. "Coz if 'Tsumu can't come whinin' to me, he's gonna go whinin' to you."
Y/N stops in her movements as she turns to him with dead eyes. "So I was thinkin' about transferrin' schools-"
"Haha! Ya can't run away from us that easily." Osamu laughs. "Not that you want to anyway."
"You guys really test my patience sometimes." Y/N chuckles. "But I guess I gotta put up with it, I must sacrifice myself for the greater good~"
"Oh? That's where you are, Osamu." Suna says as he enters the room. "And Y/N I guess."
"I love how I'm the afterthought." Y/N deadpans.
"I wasn't looking for you." Suna shrugs in disinterest as he makes his way over and sits down. "What's going on? We talking about our feelings?"
"No." Y/N and Osamu deadpan in unison.
"Well then let's talk about our feelings! For me, I'm feeling like an annoyance is going to come any ti-"
"So this is where you are!" Atsumu groans as he enters the room. "Me and Gin were lookin' everywhere for ya!"
"This is literally the first place we checked." Ginjima sighs tiredly.
"So the annoyance has arrived." Suna whispers as Y/N and Osamu chuckle.
"What are'ya all doin' here anyways?" Atsumu asks as he sits down.
"Just eatin' and talkin'." Y/N shrugs.
"Yer eatin' and talkin' and didn't invite me??" Atsumu huffs. "Talk about rude!"
"As if we want you here." Osamu deadpans. "Invitin' yerself when yer clearly not wanted? Talk about rude!"
"I have been here for five seconds." Ginjima mutters under his breath as he sits down and slumps in his seat, holding his head in his hands. "This is why people become alcoholics..."
"Wait, this wasn't even a weird conversation. Why's he already given up?" Atsumu asks as he points at Ginjima.
"I think this is just his pent-up suffering that's now taken a toll on his body." Suna answers as they all observe Ginjima carefully. "It doesn't matter what's happening, Gin's used to suffering so his mind automatically assumes that he's suffering, regardless of the circumstances."
"Am I your science experiment??" Ginjima groans as Atsumu opens his mouth to speak, only for Y/N to elbow him in the side.
"Of course not Hitoshi, we love you and we're glad yer here." Y/N answers like a robot as Ginjima sighs.
"I'm gonna pretend that that was sincere so that I feel better."
"It was sincere! I'm always sincere!"
"Don't pile lies upon yer lies." Ginjima deadpans as Y/N pouts.
"I see the trust is strong..."
"The trust is strong!" Atsumu chimes helpfully. "We trust that yer not a nice person, so we know!"
"Excuse me, I don't wanna hear that I'm not a nice person. Not from the person with the personality of sewage water." Y/N deadpans. "If Hitoshi said I'm not a nice person, I will graciously accept his words. But you? I'm insulted."
"She's insulted. Apologise." Osamu repeats as he and Y/N cross their arms and stare at Atsumu.
"Wait, are you guys twins??"
"Wish she was, the one I got is broken." Osamu deadpans.
"Oi!"
"I miss my phone."
"Shut up Suna, yer holdin' yer phone." Atsumu groans as Suna sighs solemnly.
"I know, but I still miss it."
"How does that work?"
"You five are bein' too loud!" Coach Kurosu groans as he stomps into the room with Coach Oomi. "Why are'ya all here anyway?? Can'tcha all gossip in yer room??"
"Why would we do that coach?" Suna asks innocently. "If we gossiped in our room then you wouldn't have come to gossip with us."
Coach Kurosu stops in his tracks as he tilts his head to the side in confusion. "I didn't come here to gossip with you."
Suna sighs dramatically as he takes out his phone and starts voice recording himself. "Dear diary, today I was rejected from the person I trusted the most..."
"You might not wanna let yer mother hear that recording, she might get disappointed." Coach Kurosu deadpans as Suna shrugs.
"Disappointing my mum? Nothing new."
"Ouch."
"Yikes."
"Same."
"...My mum's proud of me." Ginjima mumbles sheepishly as he bashfully scratches his head. "I uhh... I hope yer mums are proud of ya too!"
'...That's kinda pure.' Everyone thinks to themselves as they metaphorically clutch their hearts.
"That's nice of ya, Gin." Coach Kurosu smiles before dropping his expression and turning to the rest of the group. "Now... get back to yer rooms!"
"But whyyyy!!!"
"One... two..."
"Oh sh*t." Suna mumbles as they all instantly get up and run back to their rooms, not wanting Coach Kurosu to count to three.
Sighing to himself, Coach Kurosu fixes up their chairs as he rubs his head.
"That's the future of Inarizaki." Coach Oomi deadpans.
"I don't need the reminder, Tarou."
~~~~~
...So, perhaps I am in love with Sakusa :) haha... perhaps... *head in hands*
So haha... How we feeling? :))
This chapter's a little shorter than my recent ones~ Although it's about the same length as my earlier chapters =w= I realised I was subconsciously pushing myself to make longer and longer chapters, so this one's a bit of a breather for me =w= Hope you still like it though! :D
I have officially gotten through my wave of assignments! 🤩🤩 I finally have freedom to do all my other work and to enjoy... HAIKYUU SEASON 4 2ND-COUR!! 🤩🤩🤩 I AM VERY HYPED ALTHOUGH I HAVE FEARS 🤩 BUT I WILL IGNORE THE FEARS AND HOPE FOR THE BEST
Anyway! I drew some more Inarizaki art OuO
This is probably my most favourite one so far XD So I hope you like it! :D
Also, while I was writing this, I accidentally wrote "Hotoshi" instead of "Hitoshi" but I was like "nono, Hotoshi is right too" so if you see me calling Ginjima "Hotoshi", it was on purpose. I love my man Ginjima Hotoshi 🤩 XD
Another thing omg, I'm lowkey upset that the anime robbed Ginjima of his silver hair?? Like bro, the "Gin" in his name literally means silver. He's a SILVER FOX! WHY DID THEY ROB HIM OF HIS SILVER HAIR I-
I am fine 💖
Anyway! Thankyou for reading! :D I got some exciting upcoming stuff, so I hope you look forward to them! OuO Take care~