Later that same night, Jeremiah met Cressida at Ministry. Jeremiah did not ask where she'd been, and she didn't volunteer the information. She did not ask him for his evenings itinerary either, as she already knew the answer. Both of them had other things on their minds at that point, so the topic never came up. Neither did Jeremiah advise her of his next evenings' plans until they both had awakened, as Cressida noticed Jeremiah very obviously placing a few items in his knapsack. When he told her he'd be staying at Scott's place for the next couple nights, she of course understood the reason without needing to ask. The news, and Jeremiah's refusal to discuss his reasons, upset her – or, she seemed to be upset. Whether she really was upset, whether it was simply a cover, or whether it was a combination of the two could not have been knowable. Perhaps Cressida herself didn't fully understand her own feelings on the matter.
"It's only for a short while, Cressida, I swear, upon my honor!"
"Oh, like you swore you'd meet me in Petra after the Nabateans got me safely across the Sinai?"
"That is unfair, Cressida."
"Bullshit, it's totally fair. So, you're moving in with Scott Campbell for a while, but you're not interested in telling me why? Come on, Jeremiah, try being honest with me for a change!"
"Perhaps it is you who should be honest, Cressida. Honest with yourself, above all."
"Oh, god, here we go with the afternoon talk show psychobabble bullshit again, and all because the great Malek, excuse me, Jeremiah, thinks he has grown so much in the last few hundred years!"
If Cressida had intended to move her beloved to anger, she was certainly succeeding. "I have grown, Cressida, more than you could ever know."
"Whoopee!"
"And if that is the attitude you have toward me, then perhaps it is better if we part ways for a while!"
"Fine," She spat as she grabbed her gear bag, then headed out of Jeremiah's sanctuary toward the main floor of Ministry. Jeremiah followed her, still angry, and yet not truly wanting her to leave.
"Wait, Cressida, I'm sorry. I was angry."
"Don't be sorry, be angry. Be the vampire I remember. Be Malek."
"No! I have told you, Malek is dead. I am Jeremiah now."
"Yeah, I get it. Malek is dead. So are we."
Cressida stormed away from Jeremiah, heading up the stone stairs to the rectory. Jeremiah watched her leave. He hadn't noticed Kitty Weems sitting at a desk in the corner, sipping on a latte and chewing on a bagel.
"So," Kitty said, "Was she here all night?"
"Not that it's any of your business, Kitty, but yes, she was."
"Gee! Sorry for asking! I just... I guess there's still something between you two, isn't there?"
"Apparently not anymore."
"It's just kind of weird, seeing someone else here. Someone unauthorized, I mean."
"Write me up, if you so desire."
"No, Jeremiah! That's not... that's not what I mean. I mean, sometimes I forget that you're, you know..."
"A vampire?"
"Well, yeah, that, and a man with, you know, feelings. Oh, you know what I mean."
"Ah. I think I see. And I often forget that you are a woman with, you know, feelings."
Not that it was a difficult task to accomplish, but that sentiment made Kitty blush. "Oh, now, Jeremiah. It's not that way!"
Jeremiah smiled. "I am sure it isn't."
"No, really!"
"In any event, it would not be wise for us to pursue a relationship. You know that."
"Oh, hey, yeah, totally!"
"I mean, I certainly wouldn't want things to get weird between us."
"Oh, I know what you mean. Don't want any weirdness!"
"Still, Kitty, you are a lovely young woman, and you are brilliant. Any man would be proud to have you by his side."
"Aw, gee, thanks!"
Jeremiah nodded. "Anyway, I must be going, at least for a while. I will be staying with Scott, at his mother's house, in order to help keep an eye on his half-brother."
"Oh! How cool! A vampire sleepover! Someone, break out the 'smores!" Kitty, apparently impressed by her own sense of humor, started laughing, loudly and annoyingly. Jeremiah didn't understand; then again, Kitty's sense of humor was difficult to understand for anyone.
"Uh, well, sleeping is part of the arrangement, I'm sure."
*
The next afternoon, Irene, Doug, and Scott were sitting around the kitchen table, Doug enjoying mom's toasted cheddar cheese sandwiches, as Scott watched him devour the gooey, cheesy delights. Doug made it a point to exalt the golden sandwiches and wondering why Scott did not partake. Spurred on by his half-brother and his praise of Irene's culinary skills, and his own familiarity with same said skills, Scott decided to join in on the fun. Of course, the enjoyment for him was no longer in the meal, as mom's toasted cheese sandwiches, once one of his favorite comfort foods, now tasted like nothing. But since they did not contain garlic (and never did, actually), they did him no harm.
The news that Scott had a newly discovered half-brother was big, of course, so naturally he called Pastor Larry. Scott went to his room and made sure the door was closed as Doug and Irene were distracted by some other fascinating activity (okay, he was helping Irene wash the dishes, that kiss-ass).
"Well, why didn't you call me yesterday?" Larry asked.
"I was kinda busy at the time!"
"Oh yeah? But you could tell Dawn, and that Jeremiah guy, but not your old buddy Larry?"
"I was preoccupied."
"Seriously? I was the first mortal you revealed yourself to, and you didn't even stop to think that maybe I might be interested to know that you had a brother? I'll bet you told Tim, didn't you?"
"No! I didn't tell Tim! I was kind of involved in some stuff, okay? Tell you what, next time I find out some major personal news I'll post it all over social media, and let everybody know all at once, okay?"
"Calm down, Scott, I'm just messing with you!"
"Larry, I'm a vampire. You don't mess with vampires."
"Point taken. Look, I'm happy for you!"
"You are? That's great. I'm not."
"Okay, spill it, vampire."
Scott held his hand to the cellphone, hoping to muffle it, even though his door was closed. "Remember when I told you, the weekend of the retreat, that a supernatural assassin tried to kill me? Well, she was actually looking to kill him. Somehow she mistook me for my half-brother. He's a lot older than me, Larry! And taller, and better dressed, and better looking. Anyway! She's still out to kill him!"
"Okay, so why is a supernatural assassin trying to kill your brother?"
"This is where it gets really fun: he ripped off the most powerful drug cartel in Northern Mexico. So, of course, they want him dead."
Scott could practically hear Larry palming his face. "Oh, Lord, not this kind of thing again!"
"Jeremiah and Dawn think I should help protect him. What do you think?"
"Oh, like you need my permission? Scott, if it is in your ability, and it is, you should do the right thing. You know what that is."
Scott sighed. "Well, of course, my pastor thinks I should do the right thing, what was I thinking?"
"That's right. So, go do the right thing, and bring him to church next Sunday. I'd like to meet your brother."
"Half-brother."
"Whatever."
"Even if he has a contract out on him by a major international narcoterrorist?"
"I've had vampires in my church. See how not fazed I am?"
"Okay, fine. You'll probably love him, I mean, everyone else seems to."
"Do I detect a bit of jealousy, Scott?"
"Well, I am a vampire, Larry."
"I thought you weren't going to use that excuse anymore, remember?"
"Crap."
*
After hanging up with Larry, Scott had to call his best friend, Tim O'Neill. They hadn't talked much since The Big Weekend (a title that Dawn and Scott thought up simultaneously), and since Tim was slated to be his best man (for the second time) Scott thought that he should know of his newfound joy ("joy" being a sarcastic euphemism for "annoyance", in case you weren't sure).
"Well, I'll be! A brother! Or, half-brother. Your crazy world just gets crazier with every passing day!"
"Tell me about it."
"I mean, Scott Campbell has a brother? That's probably scarier than the fact that you're a vampire. I mean, how can the world deal with two Campbell boys? That's nothing short of apocalyptic!"
"Uhg. Don't mention 'apocalyptic' to me. I've been through an apocalypse already; didn't care for the experience."
"Yeah, yeah. So, he's going to be staying with you and your mom for now?"
"That he is."
"And does he know you're... you know... what you are?"
"No, he doesn't. Neither does mom. And you are not going to say or even imply anything that might give away the fact that I may be... you know."
"So, you are in the closet! Just, a different closet than I thought you'd be in."
"That wasn't remotely funny."
"Yes, it was. By the way, I get the feeling that there's more to this story."
"There is. I need to keep an eye on Doug. He's in a bit of trouble."
"A bit of trouble? Is this 'bit of trouble' anything like being a 'little bit pregnant'?"
"I wish. No, make that a lot of trouble. The kind that comes back looking to kill you."
"Gaaah! That's pretty big trouble!"
"Yeah, which is why my vampire mentor Jeremiah will also be staying with us."
"So, now your mom is going to have not one, but two vampires staying with her, and a guy with a hit out on him? Boy, I'm glad she's your mother, not mine!"
"And, what's more, when I'm at work in the evenings, I'm going to ask you to stop by and just check in. Make sure everything is copacetic."
"Are you nuts?"
"No, I'm a vampire. So do what I'm asking. I can compel you, you know."
"Uh, you can?"
"Yeah, it's a thing."
"You haven't compelled me to do anything before, have you?"
"Well, there was that time I had you thinking you were a duck."
"Wha... oh, you got me! I can't believe Scott Campbell got me!"
"It's my heightened vampiric senses. Anyway, you gonna stop by, or not?"
"I dunno. First, you ask me to be your best man, again, now you ask me to check in on your mom, your half-brother, who, conveniently, has someone out to kill him, and your mentor dude, who is a vampire. Really, Scott?"
"Humor me."
"Humor you? Bite me!"
"Okay, if you insist."
"Wait! I didn't mean that literally!"
*
Understanding that Tim could probably not contribute anything useful toward the defense of his half-brother, there was one more person Scott had to contact: that being his fiancée, Dawn. He had grown to trust and respect her skills and her moxie, having fought several battles beside her in the last couple years – and he thought on how badly he'd wanted to keep her away from his struggles in the past. Now Scott was actively involving her. She was happy, of course, but he was still hesitant. He still worried about her. But Scott thought that maybe it was better to keep her close, because he knew she'd find trouble well enough on her own. Besides, he liked having her close, and for more than just the obvious reasons.
"Hey, darling," Scott said over telephonic airwaves, "We're having a party at my house, I guess."
"Oh, yeah, sure. Sounds like a party. Who all is attending?"
"Well, Jeremiah, of course. And I called Tim to—"
"Tim? Seriously? You're getting Tim involved in this?"
"Well, I just thought I would have him check in to make sure everything is okay, you know?"
"Seriously, Scott? We're talking life-threatening danger here! And you thought having Tim check in would be a good idea?"
"Dawn, you know my mother is also in danger. I just thought an extra set of eyes around the place could help."
"What, and Jeremiah's presence wasn't good enough? And what about me? Why didn't you run it by me, Scott?"
"I guess that's what I'm doing, now."
"Scott, we are going to be married. We should discuss things before you run off and do them, don't you think?"
Damn. She had him there. "Uh, I guess."
"Really, Scott. What can Tim contribute to the plate should things go sideways? What is he good at? Name one martial skill he has, Scott!"
"Um, farting?"
Scott could hear Dawn palm her face. "That's not a thing, Scott. Really. That's not a thing."
"Okay, fine. Do I need to even ask you to check in on them?"
"You know I will. I'll even make sure Tim doesn't say anything stupid."
"Well, it's Tim, so that may be the tallest order of them all..."
*
Jeremiah arrived just as Scott was preparing to leave for work that afternoon. He had previously been allowed entry to Scott's home by his mother, who was always very welcoming to his vampire mentor (she may have been an older lady, but she did still appreciate a large, strapping, handsome man with well-developed muscles and near zero body fat), so he was quite at ease entering Scott's home, or his mother's home, as it were.
"So, mom, Jeremiah is going to be hanging out here for a few days. Is that okay?"
"Uh, well, okay, but where is he going to sleep? We don't have any extra beds!"
"That's okay," Scott clapped his hand to Jeremiah's shoulder, "Jeremiah can sleep in my room. I have that old air mattress, and a sleeping bag, he can use those."
"Oh, no, that hardly sounds comfortable at all!"
"It is fine, Mrs. Campbell," Jeremiah said, "I will be fine. Yes, I am more than happy with these arrangements."
"Ah, well, I'm sure you boys will have a grand time, won't you!"
"You bet we will!" Scott answered with an enthusiasm he suddenly found himself tempering, as he remembered his mother's none-too-discreet hints at the nature of his relationship with Jeremiah. Sure, Scott was getting married to a female, but you never knew where his mother's mind would wander. "But not too grand of a time, no sir!"
"Ah, well, I certainly don't mind the company," Mom said, "Since Douglas Senior passed, this place has been kind of quiet. Even since my Scotty moved back in, and he's so quiet you know, this place has been kind of dead!"
More than you know, mom. "Yeah, very true, which is why I also invited Tim O'Neill and Dawn to stop by later as well!"
"Oh my, so, you just decided to invite all these people over tonight? And you're not going to be here? That's a lot of extra plates at the table! I'm not a short order cook, you know!"
"Mrs. Campbell," Jeremiah said, "You needn't trouble yourself for me, I, like your son, am on a restricted diet."
"Oh, well that still leaves Dawn, and Doug, and Tim."
"Mom, I'll buy them a pizza," Scott said, "Don't worry about it."
"Oh, very well. Just get it from that good pizza place, the one I like, okay? And remember I don't like raw onions!"
"Got it. Good pizza place, no raw onions."
Just then, Doug stepped out of the kitchen. "So, did I hear someone say that they're ordering pizza?"
"Yeah, I did."
"Well, I am supposed to be watching the fats and the carbs, but you know what, screw it. Anybody like anchovies?"
"No, nobody likes anchovies, Doug."