Christopher
Bonn, Germany
Damn it. Damn and blast to hell and beyond.
I dropped my phone harshly on the table, biting my lip to burst it open. Where the hell was I supposed to go from this point?
How can I be this stranded in my life?
I had no defense. Alcohol had made the biggest mockery of me that night and I woke up the next morning, completely naked. The previous night, Irene was trying to kiss me but I was too heavy to push her away or make a drastic decision.
Now she comes claiming to be pregnant with my child and there's no way I can outrightly object to such a bizarre allegation because I wasn't even aware of what I had truly done that night.
It was a bloody mess that had my blood boiling. When she unearthed her 'truth' yesterday, all the blood that my heart pumped went straight to my head, making it feel ten times heavier than ever. It was at that moment that my resolve to never be a coward was put to the test.
There was so much to be afraid of. There were limited choices to make and making the hard choices at that moment would have seemed an outrageous thing to do. I was tempted to run away and hide from everything.
The thought of telling the truth as it was to my wife was extremely scary. I tried to discard it many times but after thinking several other thoughts and trying to formulate other choices to make, I knew in the depths of my heart that it was what I had to do if I wanted an eventual, satisfying and palatable result.
Yemisi was my wife.
The only person I could plead with to be by my side. I'd hurt her and was probably even undeserving of her but she still wanted me to communicate with her and not lie to her.
I had to chose not to be overwhelmed by the anxiety and scenarios I'd created in my mind. I had to stop thinking about my wife like I was the last time because it made me do foolish and cowardly things.
No matter how bad the situation was, I owed it to her to let her know about it first. Even if it eventually turned out to be as ugly as imagined. It was a vow we made to stay true to one another and to stay by each other's side.
So I texted Irene's claims to her.
I wanted to hate myself for putting my wife in this terrible situation because I was equally in pain. It wasn't my fault and I never wished to be in that position, no matter how stupid my prior decisions were. I needed help too.
We had to go through the pain together if we genuinely desired for things to get better.
But I was looking for ways to make the pain a little easier to bear. I was relying on my informant to give me the next bit of information which might do a great deal to save my marriage.
All I wanted to hear was that Irene's father was dead. That information would be a great headstart for me to establish the nuisance that Irene was causing and from there, I can go on to know the true paternity of the child she claimed to be carrying. I would have every right to make my findings.
But I could not get my darn informant on the phone. For the past eighteen hours, his line has been unavailable. Then I recalled that Irene made mention of the fact that she knew what I was up to so maybe...
Or most likely...
Jesus.
I couldn't believe it had taken me eighteen hours to realize it.
With widened eyes, I picked my suit and phone up and ran out of the office. I dialed his line again. Now it was completely switched off. I ran out of my company to the streets, sweating and afraid of the mighty unknown.
Then I nearly bumped into my wife. It was hard to stop running because I had already been deep into the activity. I swallowed hard.
To say that she looked dejected would be putting it mildly. It was then I knew that I had something else to deal with especially since my guesses as to why she was here were most likely correct.