Dianne's PoV
Joe had sounded extremely excited in the voicemail I'd been left during my B Troupe rehearsals. Apparently he'd totally skipped A Troupe rehearsals to choreograph our duet to the highest standard, and although I don't totally approve of skipping Nationals rehearsals just to choreograph a duet I will most definitely be changing anyway, it's really cute that he's done it. I've been told to go straight to the rehearsal room he's in.
I walk in, and quite honestly I'm shocked. He looks an absolute mess. He's covered in sweat, he looks exhausted and to someone who didn't know Joe you'd probably think he should be in some sort of mental hospital.
"Are you okay?" I put my bag down and go over to him. "You literally look ill."
"Yeah," he laughs breathlessly. "I've been working on this for the majority of the day. I went to contemporary class, then started on rehearsing this. I went for an hour to A Troupe rehearsals because I felt bad, but they let me go because they know I'm doing this to get you back on the team and they need you almost as much as I do."
I nod slowly. I hadn't really thought about how it might've been affecting the team as a whole. I feel a bit selfish now.
"Anyway, wanna see what I've got?" he grins. "I borrowed Zoe for a bit to be my dance partner but she had to leave so this might look a bit weird with just me dancing but I hope you understand it!"
I laugh a little. He doesn't have to worry. I'll be able to tell what he's trying to do without having a partner there. Joe runs over to the speaker and presses play, starting the dance almost immediately.
It's a contemporary routine, filled with multiple tricks and lifts, some of which I know are pretty hard and if executed properly will definitely wow the judges at Nationals.
"I have to say, I'm impressed," I smile when Joe stops dancing, struggling to catch his breath.
"Yeah?" he asks. He sounds like death, but his little hopeful eyes reassure me.
"A hundred percent," I smile. He smiles back at me, his face turning into that teddy bear look I love.
We stay there for a short moment, just staring at each other and smiling.
"Thank you," I say eventually, hugging him.
He's surprised by the sudden embrace, but he quickly wraps his arms around me too. I'm starting to feel like I'm home.
"I know you'll probably want to change some things or maybe like the entire thing," Joe says when we pull away, biting his lip. "But I hope it gave you a good starting point maybe?"
"I'm not gonna change it," I say. "It's perfect."
And I mean it.
He hasn't even completed the first list, and yet when I look at his face and into those eyes, I'm feeling myself fall in love with him all over again. And that's the most extraordinary feeling in the whole world.
Joe's PoV
Dianne's approval of my duet choreography literally makes my day. I'm definitely on my way to winning her back.
"Just gotta write some letters and you're back on the team," I remind her.
"Yep," she giggles. "I gotta say, I'm looking forward to dancing that duet with you. It looks like a lot of fun."
I beam at her. It's like happiness itself is swirling through my veins.
"Anyway, I gotta go now, but I'll see you tomorrow," she waves and dashes out the door before I even have time to say goodbye.
I decide it'll be easier to stay at the studio and write the letters. I like being here, and at home my mum would just be on me to do homework. I decide to start with my mum.
Dear Mum,
I'm sorry for being a crappy son at times. I know you love me and I'm bloody fantastic overall but I often don't listen or I disobey you or I say shit I don't mean. I'm sorry for all of it. I love you so much for everything you do for me, and every time you put up with my shit. Thank you for being the best mum.
Lots of love from Joseph xxx
Then Zoe.
To Zoella,
I know I'm honestly the best brother you could ever ask for, but that doesn't mean I'm perfect, and I wanna apologise for all the times I've said something intended as a joke but it's crossed the line. I need to learn that you've got a different sense of humour and my words can often hurt more than I realise. Thank you for loving me and helping me through everything despite it all though. You're awesome.
Lots of love, Joe x
P.S. Sorry for the arts stuff I stole from your desk :)
Then dad.
Hi Dad,
I know you don't like soppy stuff so I'll keep it short. I'm sorry for every time I've disappointed you, disobeyed you or been rude to you. It's uncool and I'm grateful that you continually forgive me even when I don't actually say sorry. You're brilliant.
Love Joe x
I stay at the studio until I've written close to fifty apology letters and put them in envelopes that I've decorated with glitter and stickers I found and stole/borrowed from Zoe's room. They look great, and I'm honestly so proud of myself.
I take a photo of them all and send it to Dianne.
Dianne: no way did you do all that yourself omg
Joe: you better believe it - I mean I kinda stole Zoe's craft stuff from her room to make them look pretty, but I've been at the studio since you left making them all
Dianne: that's genuine dedication, how adorable
Joe: I can't wait for you to open yours
Dianne: wait you wrote one for me?!
Joe: but of course m'lady ;)
There was a long pause in which she didn't reply, and I was about to close my phone, assuming the conversation had ended, but then I got a new message.
Dianne: meet me in the park in 10
Joe: it's literally 11pm
Dianne: i know. now, as I said, meet me at the park in ten mins x
Joe: okay x
I stare at my phone wondering what could possibly be so important that she's making me go to the park in the freezing cold at 11pm on a school night instead of waiting to tell me tomorrow or, even better, just texting me. However, I'm super glad she's inviting me places now.
———
I get to the park before Dianne, and text her that I'm sat on the benches near the lamppost. It's not that I'm scared of the dark, but I want to be able to see her face.
"Read it to me," is the first thing she says as she jumps onto the seat opposite me. "Read me my letter."
Startled, it takes me a few seconds to register her request. I take out the letters, but they're pretty difficult to read in the dark, even with vague light from the lamppost.
"Umm," I say, squinting to try and make sense of the words.
"Okay, just tell me what it said then," Dianne says, realising I can't actually see it. "Just tell me what you wrote as best as you can remember."
I nod. The pressure was on. However, once I'd started, I realised how easy it was to keep going.
"To Dianne," I begin, my voice shaking slightly, and not from the cold. I take a deep breath and look her directly in the eye. "I love you. I love you so so much and the fact that I hurt you, intentional or not, breaks my heart. It's been the most miserable time without you by my side, because you made me a better person. You made me want to be the best person I could possibly be. And you still do. I'm so sorry for everything I've done to make you sad, for every time I've disappointed you, for every time I've left you feeling even the slightest bit down. You are the most important person in the world to me, and I can't stress enough how much life sucks without you. I love you, I love you, I love you. You are everything. You're beautiful, kind, strong, and so fucking talented. You're the best dancer on the team, and they need you. But more importantly, I need you. You complete me, and you make me a better person than I ever thought I could be. So I thank you, and I apologise to you, because it doesn't mean shit if everyone else loves me and you don't, because you're the only person who's opinion matters to me. And I'm rambling here and I'm sorry for that too because the letter was so well worded and this isn't because you're just sat in front of me and I don't know what to say because there aren't enough words in the world to explain my feelings towards you." I look down as I finish talking, feeling like I've totally fucked up. I should've just got out my phone torch and read the damn letter I'd already written.
"I'm sorry too," Dianne says quietly. I look up, and even though the only light sources are the moonlight on her face and the dim light from the lamppost, I've never been able to see her so clearly. "I overreacted. You complete me too, and you mean the world to me, and I'm sorry for everything."
Then she rises from her position opposite me, and walks round to sit next to me. Instinctively I reach up and touch her face, and she doesn't pull my hand off or lean back. She just holds me gaze, her face unreadable. We stay like that for a moment, just staring into each other's eyes, knowing nothing else matters but each other.
"I love you," she whispers.
And then she kisses me.
Dianne's PoV
The speech Joe gave me made me realise how much I'd fucked up too, and just how much he meant to me. I couldn't not kiss him in that moment, where he was at the most vulnerable I'd ever seen him, pouring his heart out to me.
"I love you too," Joe whispers when our kiss finishes, our noses and foreheads still touching. Then he suddenly sits backwards.
"But what about the list?" Joe looks at me.
"Fuck the list," I laugh. "It was dumb and I shouldn't have made it in the first place. It was just fun, but I don't need you to prove yourself. You'll never need to prove yourself. You're fucking awesome and I'm never letting anything break us up again."
He engulfs me into the biggest and most beautiful hug I've ever had, and we sit there in the moonlight just holding each other tightly, never letting go.
I hope you enjoyed that fluffy lil chapter bc I enjoyed writing it🥺🥰
Part of this was that I was rethinking the list and realised two lists were excessive and didn't really need to happen.
I've got shit tons of deadlines still so I'm still not 100% sure when the next update will be but I'm trying my hardest!!
- Bee xo