Episode Nine: That's What You Get, Folks, for Making Whoopee
Stevie Quay's voice is heard as pictures from Episode Seven flash across the screen. "Remember all those dates that were happening not that long ago?"
Pictures of Stevie and Gabby in the lobby of the Sunset Marquis, Bobby and Melinda at Neiman Marcus, and Cynthia and William in the backseat of the Rolls Royce are displayed on the screen. "It's time to get back to it!"
Cynthia and William sit at a table in a dimly lit restaurant. A young man comes over and glances nervously at the camera. He fills their glasses with water and walks away. The couple peruse their menus as soft music plays in the background. A waiter approaches the table.
"Good afternoon, my name is Heath, and I'll be taking care of you. Would you like to see a wine list?"
William and Cynthia exchange a glance. Cynthia says, "Well, it's not five o'clock, but it isn't seven in the morning, either!" William smiles, so Cynthia tells Heath to bring the wine list. After the waiter walks away, Cynthia looks at William. "If you want, we can order our food to go and eat it in the Rolls Royce."
"Can we really do that?" He asks with wide eyes.
"William, I was kidding!" Cynthia shakes her head and giggles. "You and that car! Maybe we should have taken my Prius after all," she teases. William reaches across the table and takes Cynthia's hands in his.
"You are the best part of this whole show, you know that?" He says quite seriously.
"Even more than the car?" She whispers. He nods.
"Even more than the car."
The waiter returns, and William orders a Bordeaux Blend. Cynthia raises her eyebrows in surprise. "So you know wine." She says. "I don't know wine at all. I could hold my own in the vodka section of a liquor store, but wine is totally lost on me."
"Do you remember when Bobby told me I could be pretentious?" William asks her. "Well, this is one of those times when he's actually telling the truth." He picks up his food menu. "I think I'm going to order the filet. How about you?"
The screen fades, but William and Cynthia reappear. They are still sitting at the table in the restaurant. "I can't believe we drank three bottles of wine!" Cynthia says with a slight slur in her voice.
"Was it three bottles?" William asks as he looks around. He's having trouble focusing. "I don't even remember ordering a third bottle." The waiter, Heath, walks to the table.
"Dr. Plath, would you like me to put this meal on your tab?" Heath asks.
"That would be loverly...lovery? Lovely! That would be lovely!" Cynthia says as she tries to stand. She starts to fall back in her seat, but Heath catches her. "Well that was embarrassing," she says as she clings to Heath's shirt. She glances at William who is still looking around. "We should go, William."
They stumble to the Rolls Royce, which is waiting for them as soon as they exit the restaurant. Suddenly, they hear, "Hey, Cynthia!" Both turn just as a bright flash hits their eyes. "Thanks for the picture! Have a great night!"
"(Bleep)ing paparazzi," Cynthia slurs as they crawl into the backseat.
"Is it just me, or did that voice sound vaguely familiar?" William asks as he puts his head on Cynthia's lap. Cynthia makes a sound resembling agreement. William slowly sits up and starts laughing.
"What's so funny?" Cynthia asks but then starts laughing, too.
"I don't remember the last time I was this drunk," William says. "Why are you laughing?"
Cynthia can't get any words out because she is in hysterics. Suddenly, she snorts. "Oh my god! That 's so embarrassing!" She says, but then she resumes her laughter and snorts again.
"I think it's adorable," William tells her as he leans in closer to her face. Cynthia stops laughing and looks William in the eyes. He gently touches her cheek with his hand. "I'd like to kiss you now, if that's okay," he says as his mouth gets closer to hers.
Cynthia nods and closes the distance between their lips. Their first kiss is gentle, but it quickly escalates in intensity as their tongues repeatedly collide with urgency and passion. They seem to have forgotten the camera is still present.
The Rolls Royce pulls up to the Sunset Marquis and the kissing stops. William sits back and wipes his mouth. "I suddenly feel extremely sober," he says. Cynthia fixes her disheveled hair and clears her throat. "Thank you for everything," William tells her.
He reaches for the door handle, but quickly turns and pecks Cynthia on the cheek. "Good night," he says and gets out of the car before Cynthia can say anything. Cynthia stares after him but doesn't move. The door slams shut, and she's left alone.
"Good night," she whispers. She asks the driver to take her home. The camera stays on her sitting in the backseat alone. She stares out the window for a few minutes before reaching for her purse. As soon as she opens it, she rolls her eyes.
"Oh, crap," she says. "Can you please turn the car around and go back to the hotel?" She says to the driver.
In the next scene, Cynthia is standing in front of a closed door. She shuts her eyes and knocks twice. Loudly. William opens the door with a look of surprise. "Cynthia..."
"Sorry to bother you," she says rather coldly while holding out a cellphone in her hand. "I found your phone in my purse, and I figured you would need it."
"Thank you," William says as he takes the phone. "Look, Cynthia..."
"Okay, good night," she says as she turns to head back to the lobby. William gently grabs her arm, and she stops.
"Cynthia, wait," he begs. "I'm sorry about bolting from the car like that." She looks at him but doesn't say anything. "I didn't trust myself to..." He stops and looks at the camera. "Oh, hell." He takes her in his arms and kisses her hard. He awkwardly leads her into his villa and shuts the door with his foot.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Bobby and Melinda Smarts are both dressed in robes, holding hands, and sitting side by side on a private deck. "You've exhausted me, woman!" Bobby says as he smiles at his wife. They are back at the Sunset Marquis. There's a fresh pitcher of martinis on the glass table beside them. The pitcher remains untouched as the reunited couple gaze lovingly into each other's eyes.
"Does that mean you actually had fun shopping with me today?" Melinda asks.
"Of course not!" Bobby says with a chuckle. "But what we did after shopping sure was fun!" He leans over and kisses her on the mouth.
"Oh, Bobby! Is that all you ever think about?" Melinda says as she rolls her eyes. She leans back in her chair, and the front of her robe slips open. She doesn't move to close it. The camera angle shifts, so nothing is exposed.
"God, you're a beautiful woman," Bobby says as he reaches over to take advantage of the open robe. Melinda giggles, but she doesn't stop him.
"Again?!" She asks as Bobby gets up from his chaise lounge and pulls his wife to her feet.
"Not yet," he tells her. "I'm hungry for actual food." Melinda fixes her robe as they walk back into Bobby's villa as he looks around for his pants. "Let's get dressed and go downstairs for a late dinner."
"You mean you don't want to order room service?" Melinda gushes as she plops on the unmade bed.
"C'mon, Baby," Bobby says. "Let's get out of the villa for a little bit. Besides," he says as he kisses her cheek, "I want to show off my hot wife!"
The scene changes and the Smarts sit at a table in the restaurant of the hotel. Melinda is people watching and occasionally makes snide comments about the other women in the room. "Oh my god, would you look at that woman over there? That clutch is so last year!"
Bobby stares lovingly at his wife. Even when he orders his dinner, he cannot take his eyes off her. "You know, I'm so glad we're back together. I missed you," he tells her.
Melinda smiles at him. "Oh, Baby, I missed you, too," she says. "Maybe our time apart was a good thing? It made us realize just what we had." Bobby nods.
"Where is our food? I'm starving!" He says as he looks around the restaurant for the first time. His eyes widen as a young waitress approaches their table.
"Mr. Smarts!" She says with a wide smile. "I just wanted to say thank you for the other night!"
Melinda throws daggers at Bobby. Bobby looks incredibly uncomfortable with the situation.
The young girl is oblivious to what's going on between the married couple. She turns to Melinda. "He's such a generous man!" She giggles. "Anyway, I just wanted to say thank you, and I can't wait to see you again!" The girl practically prances off, and there is a thick tension left in her wake.
"You worthless piece of—"
"Melinda, wait. I can explain!" Bobby says as his wife stands to leave. "I didn't do anything with her! I swear! I just gave her a big tip!"
"I'm sure you did! Is she even legal? You're the biggest pervert and waste of space I've ever met!" Neighboring tables take notice as Melinda's voice gets louder with each word.
"Melinda," Bobby says quietly. "Can you just sit down, and we can talk about this quietly?"
"Screw you, Bobby!" Melinda throws her napkin on her seat. "I'll get the rest of my things tomorrow. I'm leaving!" She walks out of the restaurant as Bobby sits staring after her. He looks around to the other tables.
"PMS," he says with a shrug. "What's a man to do?" His food arrives, and he takes a big bite. The couple at the table next to him still stare at him. He swallows his dinner and says, "The show is over, folks. Don't worry about me. She'll be back tomorrow." They finally look away, and the scene fades.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Stevie Quay and Gabby Jones appear on the screen as they pull into the circular driveway of a spacious single family home. Stevie gets out of his Jeep and walks around to open Gabby's door for her. He takes her hand as she steps down onto the pavement.
"I can't believe I'm about to meet Henry Quay! Do you think he'll give me his autograph?" She says as the two walk hand in hand to the front door.
"I can't believe that's going to be the highlight of our date!" Stevie remarks with a shake of his head. Gabby squeezes his hand.
"I'm sorry. It's been a really great day," she tells him. "Thank you." They stop and stand on the welcome mat.
Stevie suddenly leans down and kisses Gabby on the lips. He straightens up and smirks. "I bet my dad's not gonna give you that!"
Before Gabby can respond, the front door opens and a woman with short braids dressed in a white pants suit appears. "Oh, Stevie! I thought I heard something out here!"
"Hey, Mom," Stevie says as he gives the woman a hug. He and Gabby step inside the house. "Mom, this is Gabby, the girl I told you about," Stevie says.
"Oh, yes! It's nice to meet you, Gabby. You can call me Peaches. All my friends do." Stevie's mom shakes Gabby's hand and walks down two steps into an open living room. "Make yourself at home, Sweetie," she adds as she disappears through a doorway in the far left of the room.
"You told your mother about me?" Gabby whispers to Stevie. His smile displays his dimples as he looks a little embarrassed.
"Let me give you the tour," he says as he takes her hand and leads her down into the living room. The carpet is plush white with white leather furniture placed around the room. A white baby grand piano stands in the corner by a large window. The window looks into a courtyard with a pool. The other side of the house can be seen through the courtyard.
"Wow," Gabby can't help but say. "Your house is even bigger on the inside! It's like the Tardis!" Stevie gives her a questioning look, but Gabby notices something else of interest. "Oh my god!" She exclaims as she pulls Stevie to one side of the room. "Are these all your dad's awards?"
Gabby stares at an enclosed glass casing displaying several awards. "Three Tony's, a Pulitzer Prize for Drama," she says as she leans forward and continues reading, "New York Drama Critics Circle. What's an Ovation Award?" She points to a green glass statue in the corner of the case.
"That award is Los Angeles specific," a deep voice says from behind Gabby. She spins around and comes face to face with Henry Quay. "You must be Gabby," he says. "I'm Henry. It's a pleasure to meet you."
Henry Quay is a tall, lean man with gray temples and small, wire-rimmed glasses. A book is cradled in his left arm. He holds the book out to Gabby. She takes the book and looks at it. The cover has a black and white picture of a diner. The title reads, My Father's Seat.
"Is this the one that isn't out yet?" She squeaks.
Henry laughs. "Yes, it is, young lady," he says. "Stevie texted me earlier and mentioned you were a fan. I thought you might like an advanced copy."
"Thank you so much!" Gabby exclaims. "I can't wait to read it!"
"Okay, well, Dad, I think we're going to head to the theatre if that's okay," Stevie says.
Henry winks at Gabby and says, "Can't wait to hear what you think."
"The theatre? But we just got here!" Gabby says.
"See over there?" Stevie says as he points across the courtyard. "We have a movie theatre in that side of the house." Gabby shakes her head as they leave the living room.
"Freaking Tardis," she says under her breath.
The screen fades and viewers are once again left waiting to see what happens next on The Scholarship.