Chapter One Hundred and Thirty One
We were walking back to the hotel this time. My hand was clasped in his own, but for the most part both of us were silent. The streets were empty and the buildings were dark. My white flats clicked gently against the sidewalk, beautiful gown trailing behind me with every step.
It was hard for me to deal with all of this, to be honest.
The whole situation was just... difficult.
I wanted the uncertainty to stop, wanted to live and love and... and experience life without having to worry about creeps coming at me from the shadows. I didn't want to have to care about the month I couldn't remember, I didn't want to have to worry about why I was turned into a vampire, or how... all I wanted was to be able to focus on normal day-to-day things.
Like, what I was gonna wear each day, and getting my work done, and playing video games with Sebastian, and making love with him, and kissing him, and cooking him poorly made meals that he would probably eat anyway because it was me who'd made them, and living together.
I wanted to just... be.
I hated feeling afraid, and while I loved the fact that Sebastian tried so hard to make sure I wouldn't be, that he would protect me like some sort of prince in shining armor, I didn't want him to have to. Yet, he did have to... even now, that's what he was doing.
I wasn't sure if he could feel it, but I sure as hell felt unfriendly eyes on me for about half of the extremely long walk back, and although I was hoping we'd head straight to the hotel... instead, he stopped at the bridge near it. I was a little confused when he let go of my hand and leaned against the stone railing, taking off his fancy mask and chucking it at the water.
I watched as it fluttered down, landing lightly on the pristine surface before gently being pulled by the current, floating beneath the bridge and out of sight. Sebastian's head swiveled to look down at me, and with a scowl he snatched my own mask off my face and tossed it as well. It sailed out into the dark and landed on the surface, floating as it was also carried away.
We stood there in silence for a long time, neither one of us knowing what to say, both of us equally stressed out.
I could only stare at the water as he heaved a great sigh and hunched over, setting his elbows on the rail and putting his face in his hands. For the longest time, we just stood there with wind ruffling our clothes. I hated the fact that he was like this... that I was the reason he was so down.
Everyone had been looking forward to the party for so long and I felt, in some way, like I'd ruined it for him and them. Guilt prickled through me unpleasantly and I finally joined him in leaning on the railing, folding my arms and plopping my chin on them.
I let loose a tired sigh, wondering whether or not I should say something, maybe apologize... but he beat me to it.
"I never should have brought you here."
His voice was so raw that I turned to look at him but he didn't raise his head.
"You wouldn't have reconnected with Mephostes," I hesitantly told him. "Bad stuff happened, but we all went into this knowing it probably would, so there's no reason to beat yourself up."
"No... in retrospect, I could have saved us all the trouble by having him cancel the party and inviting him to come visit us instead," Sebastian croaked, breathing come out a little shaky; one hand came away from his face to blindly grasp my wrist. "I should have listened to you... I should have heeded the warnings and the signs and been... better. Now that I have you in my life, I need to break my habit of walking into danger hoping someone would dare to touch what's mine."
I straightened, looking at him in confusion. "What do you mean?"
"It's a habit I developed after Jasper's vanishing," he absently explained, shaking his head against his palm. "I seem fearless because I stopped fearing death, Aerin. I sank to such a low point after he abandoned me that I stopped caring about life, as well as about living it. The only things that really kept me going were the wolves back home and the constant searching I was putting myself through. Looking for my missing lover gave me purpose during those years."
My heart ached for him when I saw his mouth trembling and I immediately walked right into his side, wrapping my arms around him tightly and burying my face against his soft black suit jacket. His arm came around me and I felt him exhale, rubbing my back.
"You are the first dream of life that I've had in centuries," he hoarsely explained, finally twisting to look down at me with unhappy eyes. "I want to settle things, Aerin.... I want to end these fools who threaten you and make sure they can never do it again."
My entire body was feeling heavy when I lowered my eyes from his. I basked in his heat, basked in the warmth of the arm wrapped around my body, basked in the presence of the man who claimed to love me so much that he'd psychologically branded my existence into his mind.
"You know what?" I asked, lifting my eyes. "Let's dance, babe."
He blinked, staring at me in surprise and confusion, I couldn't see it but I could feel it.
"You want to go back?" he asked, disbelieving. "We just left, Aerin."
"No, hell no," I scoffed, shaking my head. "I mean, let's dance right here. Right here on the bridge in front of the water and this beautiful nightscape. I mean, nobody's around, there are no cars, and sure... there might not be music but we don't need that to dance, you know?"
He blinked at me, surprised... and then, for the most remarkable moment, it looked like he was fighting back a laugh. He didn't smile – he was far too high and mighty for such frivolity – but his mouth just closed tight and he tried to hide the shake of his shoulders as his eyebrow raised.
He gained his composure quickly.
"You make even the worst situations seem bright," he hummed, taking my other wrist and setting his hand against the small of my back. I smiled when he pulled me against his stomach, looking down at me with a soft and surprisingly sad expression. "Sing something for me."
I looked at him for a long moment, wondering what sort of song would suit this situation.
Would suit our feelings.
Genius struck me in a moment of clarity and I smiled at him from the core of my being.
"You are my sunshine," I hummed, watching in satisfaction as his eyes widened, "my only sunshine... you make me happy... when skies are grey. You'll never know, dear... how much I love you. Please don't take my sunshine away."
It was a lovely feeling, his hands were hot, burning against mine as he spun me across the sidewalk. I grinned in delight as the smile spread across his mouth, darkening his glowing eyes until I could barely see them in the gloom. I continued singing as he twirled me, trying to keep my breathing even and my vocals steady.
Even with no real music, his feet knew what they were doing.
I felt light as a feather as he dipped me, feeling his hand sliding across my leg as he stretched it out, leaning down over me with his mouth against my throat. With a rush that had my head spinning he pulled me back up and swung me around, extending his free arm as he snapped me as far apart as our bodies would allow. Just as I was coming back in, I saw a glint .
I stopped singing and looked beyond him.
My heart skipped a beat when I saw the masked blur rushing toward us, holding a knife.
There was no warning. There was no sign. There was no shout, or exclamation, or even a chill.
All I knew was that I saw sharp and silver poised right for Sebastian's back at the speed of an oncoming car and I had second, if not milliseconds, to do something about it. So, I did... before I could think, before I could stop myself, I lunged around his side, broke his hold on me, and whirled around, grabbing him as tightly as I could.
An agonizing ripping sensation smashed into my lower back and time seemed to slow down. My eyes went round as the force of the unexpected blow smashed against Sebastian's body so hard that both of us were knocked forward. He managed keep his footing, and I clung to him with shaking arms despite the sense of unrealism that had descended upon my mind.
I heard a gasp.
"Fuck!" a male voice cried, equal parts crazed and agonized. "Fuck, I... shit! It wasn't supposed to be you! It wasn't supposed to be you!"
I opened my mouth to cry out, to scream for Sebastian, but nothing came out: there was a heavy pressure building inside me, blocking all forms of immediate speech.
I looked up to see that Sebastian had turned, was staring down at me with his eyes wide open, a look of horror and disbelief and panic, and then his gaze flitted to look at something past me and his irises flared pure white.
Pupils shrank into pinpricks and he looked like some sort of demon.
The sensation of a body moving away from me allowed the cold air to move in. I sank down, grip slipping, and fell to my knees as my legs buckled, listening to the cracks and snaps, and then my boyfriend was leaping over me, clothes exploding as he lunged at the person who'd attacked.
I heard a scream and a snarl and I felt a spray of something hit my back, followed by gurgling, more wet screams, and the sound of flesh being torn. There were sickening snaps, crunches, and the sound of a man in agonizing pain but I chose not to look back, chose not to see.
I focused on breathing, muscles shaking, and I slumped down to all fours, letting my body go lax to avoid hurting myself further. I wasn't stupid, I knew there was a knife sticking out of my back and I knew I was injured. The screams of agony grew weaker, but Sebastian's fury was endless.
I heard guttural snarls, heard tearing limbs, the sound of physical torture and cries of true pain.
"Stop! I didn't mean to hurt him! I swear!" a voice that didn't even sound remotely human begged. screeching in its death throes. "Stop! Stop! STOP! STOP! STOP! STOP! ST--"
A roar and a sickening crunch that made me flinch, followed by wet squelch, filled the air. I heard a chilling silence, followed by what sounded like crackling and hissing, and then he was there, touching me with shaking claws covered in blood and gore. I didn't raise my eyes, I couldn't, my vision was going blurry. Just as Sebastian was about to lift me up, I heard a sound.
A whistle.
And then he coughed, deep in the core of his chest, before slumping over beside me. I turned my head when I heard a strange series of cracks, and to my horror he was lying flat in human form with a dart sticking out of his neck. He wheezed, eyes slowly glazing over, breathing heavily.
"Fuck," he whispered, gaze darting around as he fought to move. "Fuck... what is this shit?!"
"Bash?" I wheezed, horrified. "Baby! Get up!"
I tried to reach out and take the dart out, to get it out of him, but a hand snatched my own. I was gently pushed forward by someone I couldn't see, someone standing behind me, and forced onto my stomach with an odd amount of gentleness. Pain bloomed in my back.
Sebastian's eyes met mine, then flitted over my shoulder.
He blinked, then blinked again, and then his face went bone white. I watched as the color left him, as his eyes slid open so wide that I thought they'd pop out of his head, as his lips parted in a way that made me wonder what the hell he was looking at. What was with that face?
Was somebody about to kill me?
Was I about to die?
"My, my, my," a voice that literally made my mind go blank murmured. "It's been so long since I've seen you like this, Little One... a shame things turned out like this, but don't worry. Things will go back to the way they should be after tonight... I'll make sure of that."
Who? I mentally wondered, twisting my head to try and see. A shoe came down on the back of my skull, gentle but forceful, and pushed my cheek back against the concrete. I wriggled and squirmed, struggling to move, and then something touched my back.
I gasped, wheezing as my breath was stolen.
Within seconds, it felt like something was ripped right out of me and I screamed, eyes squeezing shut. I heard a snarl and saw Sebastian trying to get up despite his horrified expression, fighting and struggling to move, but another dart whistled out of the dark and landed in his naked back.
He jerked, still fighting, and a third one hit him right in the thigh.
He went limp, breathing raggedly, eyes fluttering and squinting with exhaustion.
"Jasper," he breathed, shaken to his core. "Jasper, what the hell are you doing? Why?"
A hand caressed my cheek, cool and soft, and I felt my stomach turn upside down: I almost dry-heaved at the realization of who was touching me, I couldn't believe it. What was happening? Was it really Jasper behind me? Or was it another shifter? What was real?
"Just rest, Sebastian," the voice murmured. "Tonight, the nightmare finally ends."
I felt another hand on my neck and there was a viciousness in the hold.
"Stop!" he snarled, flopping and inching closer. "Don't touch him! Don't fucking touch him!"
The hands paused, and I shuddered as a finger twined around my hair.
"I'm not gonna hurt him, Pet," Jasper murmured, and then that hand clutched my hair and drew my head back, forcing my spine to bend. I let out a yelp as something touched my throat, cold and unpleasant. "Much."
"Fucking bastard!" Sebastian cursed, reaching out, but then... to my horror, another dart hit him and his eyes finally fluttered and rolled back. He went limp, muscles going lax, and I struggled, practically hyperventilating as I wondered if this was really happening. My head was turned and suddenly I found myself looking into shockingly familiar dark brown eyes... those eyes.
The eyes from my dreams, not the blue ones but the dark ones... the frightening ones.
He smiled, and I saw teeth that mirrored my own.
Fangs.
My eyes widened when he touched me, fingers trailing first across my throat and then across my shoulder and then my hair.
"You look the same as you did back then," he said casually. "Do you know who I am, Little One?"
Everything about the vampire stranger radiated sensual grace and ease. He had surprisingly young and boyish features, large eyes with a soft, slightly-upturned nose and very short ash-brown hair that had been slicked up in a fashionable manner.
His skin was pale, dotted with freckles along his nose.
He had a relatively square face, chiseled by a strong jaw and honed by the hollow blades that were his cheekbones. He looked about as young as I did, maybe a little older, but something about his eyes gave that deceptively young appearance a very disturbing twist.
"I had hoped to draw this out," he started, eyes briefly glancing to where Sebastian was lying unconscious, "make you shiver and shake and fear this, but it looks like our time will be short."
My eyes flicked back to where my boyfriend was lying and my throat tightened.
"What are you going to do?" I demanded, and his eyes flitted to my face. "Why are you here? Why are you fucking with us? More importantly, why did you turn me into a vampire?! Why?!"
He blinked, then tilted his head as an amused smirk touched his soft, pink lips.
"Its ironic that you're asking such things," he murmured, touching my forehead with a single finger, "when you begged me, over and over, to take your memories of that month away. To wipe it all away like it never happened, to take the pain. You've been remembering all on your own, though, fighting to recall things that would only serve to hurt you."
My heart skipped a beat and I jerked away, but the action sent an explosion of pain into my back. I writhed, breath knocked out of my lungs, and fought to curl up but he held me flat and kept me from moving. I glared up at him when he smiled, cold and heartless and calculating.
"What did you do to me?" I hissed out, breathing stuttering and skipping. "What are you planning? Are you gonna kill me?"
"Kill you?" he asked, and to my confusion he looked genuinely surprised. "No, of course not. I'm here to discipline you. To show you that this, this isn't your life or your happiness. You bit off more than you could chew and I'm here to punish you for your greed."
Sebastian... was he going to hurt Sebastian?! Fuck! I had to... I had to do something! I had to... fight back! Jasper was never supposed to be here! Why was he here? I suddenly remembered that I had an ace up my sleeve and panicked.
"WU TAO FENG!" I screeched, startling him. "WU TAO ANURAK! FENG-FENG! RAK!"
"What are you screaming now?" Jasper casually inquired, smirking. "Some sort of chant?"
I bristled and called for the dragons once more, praying they would come like Feng-Feng had told me they would. I decided not humor him and instead focused on the primary issue.
"So, what do you intend to do?!" I demanded, trying to keep the conversation.
I had to stay on track.
"I intend to take back what's mine," he told me, smiling coldly. "I've already succeeded, too... at first, I was going to wipe your memory when I did this so you wouldn't suffer, but I personally feel that watching you experience what's coming for you would be far more pleasant for me."
Confusion trickled through me and I stared at him through hazy vision.
"Take back what's yours?" I asked, but then it hit me and I looked at Bash. "No. No way, he won't let you."
"He won't have a choice," Jasper crooned, petting my head, "and neither will you. The thing about us, Little One, is that we have the power of hypnotism on our side among many other things. I can toy with his mind all I want to and turn him into someone else completely, I could enslave his whole pack and make them kill each other if I wanted. Instead, I'm going to erase you from his memory and replace your most recent experiences with me. You will be nothing to him."
My stomach sank and I felt like I was frozen.
My tongue was stuck in my throat and I again wondered if this was real or if it was some twisted nightmare I couldn't wake up from. I writhed under my skin, mind wanting to scream, and then the fear set itself on fire and red-hot rage blew through me like an avalanche.
"But you abandoned him!" I screeched, fighting against his grip. "You fucking killed your child! You were cruel to him! You refused to love every single part of him, and treasure him, and give him as much as he gave you! You ran out for hundreds of years and let him suffer! Who the fuck do you think you are to just walk right back into his life after doing something so sick?!"
I had never known anger like this.
I had never known fear like this. I wanted to strangle this man. To rip him apart, piece by piece, but all I could do was fucking lie there because any wrong move could have Sebastian paying the price, and he'd already paid so much. I let out a growl of frustration that echoed.
"Don't you understand?" Jasper crooned, touching my chin. "I don't love him, Aerin. I used him, just as I've been using you all this time. Every single memory you have with him paved the foundation I needed to wipe you out of his mind and step right into your pretty little shoes--"
"I'll stop you!" I hissed, struggling to move, but I let out a cry when he pushed down with a crushing amount of force, more force than I was expecting. "Ow... ow..."
"You?" he giggled, patting my head. "How cute."
The bastard had the gall to mock and smile.
"Why are you doing this?!" I screeched. "If you don't love him, why the fuck would you do this?!"
"Because its fun," he said, looking surprised. "Why else? Free fucks, a loyal slave, and pet all in one, who wouldn't want that back? Sure, I stepped out for a bit, and I admit I wasn't expecting him to move on, especially not with you... that came as a genuine shock to me. He did always have a weak spot for people like you, though... the innocent ones. Acting is gonna be a drag."
Dread filled my heart when he moved away from me and pushed Sebastian's hair out of his face.
He was covered in blood, eyes shut, jaw locked. I hated the sight of those pale fingers on him.
"Don't touch him," I whispered. "Stop."
Jasper tilted his head, finger raising to his chin in a mockery of thought. "Do you truly love him, Aerin?"
"Yes!" I pleaded, eyes finally filling with tears. "Yes, I do! So please! Just stop!"
"Why do you love him?" he asked. "Tell me. Is it because he's rich? Is it because he's powerful? Is it because he fucks good? Because his body is perfect? Because he's got a horse cock? Uncut? I know you can't love him because of his personality. It's not possible for you--"
"But it is his personality!" I cried, struggling to move and failing as a wash of dizziness washed over me; I fell again, winded, and closed my eyes as a pounding ache throbbed in my head. "Oh..."
"Don't move too much," he said in mock concern. "You've lost a lot of blood. I don't like you, and I regret turning you, but what's done is done and I don't want you dead. You're mine, after all."
"Your what?" I spit out through clenched teeth, hating the roughness of the concrete against my cheek, hating the fact that I was here, hating it all. "Because last time I checked, I'm not your anything!"
"You're my fledgling," he informed me, and I winced. "I'm your master. I turned you, which by law makes you mine. You got mixed up in something you shouldn't have, and now you have to pay the price just like you did back then. Only this time, its your own fault."
"Stop," I begged, hands shaking when he leaned down and kissed Sebastian's lips. "Please!"
"No," he chuckled, leaning over and taking my hand; I watched, horrified, as he tried to take the engagement ring of my finger and a well of emotion burst from me. I screamed, struggling to pull my hand back, but he held it tighter and his fingers snagged it.
He gasped and let out a bark of Latin, something I didn't understand; he drew back his hand as if he'd been burned, clutching his fingers with his sharp teeth bared. I saw that his fingertips had, in fact, been burned to the point where his skin had ruptured and begun bleeding.
"What did you do to me?" he spat, eyes turning brilliant red. "What kind of power is that?!"
"My power!" I spat back at him, baring my own fangs at his venom. "Love, you asshole! You don't get to take my ring! You don't get to have my man! Even if you wipe his memory, it'll eventually come back! I mean, my memory is! After so long, my memory is coming back, even if it is only through flashbacks and dreams! You won't win even if you hypnotize him, so don't bother!"
"Do you really believe that?" he sneered, licking his lips when I nodded. "Fine. Let's put it to the test. I'll make you a deal, Little One. If you can get Sebastian to remember you and somehow make him realize, completely, what I've done... I'll leave for good and give you my blessing."
"Do I have a choice?" I demanded, heart pounding hard.
"No, either way he's going to become mine again, so decide here and now," he chuckled. "I'll even make it a little easier for you by manipulating you into the picture. How's that sound?"
I had no choice. I had absolutely no choice.
All around me I heard shattering.
"Jasper, please." My voice came out in a strangled whisper.
"Begging already, Aerin?" he crooned, smiling at me kindly.
I grit my teeth. "Please, Jasper. I'll do anything."
He quirked an eyebrow. "Anything?"
My heart, broken, trampled thing that it was, jumped in my chest.
Why was this happening? Why? Why?
"Why?" I croaked out. I couldn't understand how Jasper could do such a thing to us, and I couldn't understand how the world could let something so terrible happen to someone so wonderful, but above it all, I just couldn't understand why. Why would Jasper even want to strike out against me in the first place? He'd abandoned Sebastian on purpose.
Why would he do this?!
My nails cut into my palms as his eyes flicked back up to mine, a gaze that was eerily familiar.
"Because you ruined my game," he said simply, and I stared. "I lived for the thrill of the chase. I lived for the reality that he was obsessed with me and who I was so badly that he followed me all around the world like a foolish little lovesick puppy. I threw him bones here and there to keep him active, and watched from afar as he squirmed, constantly failing. It was my guilty pleasure."
My eyes went blank when I realized the depth of what he was saying.
"You did that to him on purpose?" I asked blankly. "You... you intentionally kept him going? You prolonged his suffering on purpose?!"
"Of course," he said, giving me a crazed smile. "I have lived for over ten thousand years, Aerin... I have seen the world rise and fall, over and over again. I have seen millions of men and women be born and then die. And then, I found him... a lost little puppy in a big, scary world, and instead of killing him I fell in love with those eyes burning with so much pain and hate."
"You're a sick fu--"
"Ah, ah," he interrupted, kicking me in the side. "Language. As I was saying... it was easy getting close to him. He was young, inexperienced, new to his lifestyle. Fresh meat. He was hurting and vulnerable and I became the rock that guided him, shaping him. Let me tell you, the night I took his virginity was one he'll never forget. I wasn't gentle. The scars on the back of his neck, hidden beneath his hair, were from that... not that you would know such things. You're literally nothing compared to me, especially when it comes to sex with him, believe you me."
I stared with tears in my eyes, horrified and shocked and repulsed.
"How dare you?" I choked. "How dare you talk about him like that?! He's a person!"
"No, he's an animal," Jasper throatily corrected, chuckling lewdly; I felt my face contorting with hate when he fucking sat down on Sebastian's back like a chair and folded his legs. "Little more than a pet to toy with. That's the point, Aerin... you want to know why I'm here? Fine. You truly interrupted my game with him and ruined my glorious plans for the future. You weren't ever supposed to cross paths, and he wasn't supposed to find or chase the crazy vampire pedo."
I could only stare at him.
He ran his fingers across the wide planes of skin on Sebastian's shoulders.
"If that's true," I stated with measured words, my mind still trying to catch up with the turn this conversation had taken, "then why are you here, now? To get him back?"
An edge of desperation colored my words. Every ounce of my being was screaming at me to kill Jasper and rescue Sebastian. To protect him. To drag him to safety.
"I'm here now because I own you both," he told me simply. "I've decided that I'm going to punish you by making you a conscious, foreign part of the game. It'll keep things interesting for a while, but I expect you'll give up since you aren't nearly smart enough to outwit me. I am a master of emotional and psychological manipulation, as you'll soon learn."
What the fuck did any of this have to do with me? I never actually did anything! And Sebastian especially didn't, so why the fuck did he have to be brought into this? Despite my thoughts I stayed silent. Nothing I said was going to win me any points in Jasper's favor.
Because this truly was never about me.
"What comes next?" I asked, feeling oddly weak; my vision was grey around the edges.
"You'll see, Little one. Sebastian," he purred, trailing a finger down the unconscious man's cheek and cutting his beautiful skin with a sharp nail, "makes you far too happy."
The knife, where it had been dropped on the ground, gleamed in the dark.
My eyes landed on it, but he saw and casually leaned forward to snag it before I could move.
"I wouldn't," he chuckled. "I really wouldn't if I were you."
"Stop," I whispered.
"Now, since you're close to bleeding out," Jasper purred, coming close to me; my heart was in my stomach. "All I have is one thing to say, Little One, before the game begins."
"And what would that be?" I spit, breathing coming out jerky and fearful.
He snatched me by the throat and hefted me, cocking his fist back with a grin.
"If it's not yours," he said, all traces of politeness gone from his tone, "don't fucking touch it."
The last thing I saw was his fist coming at me and then...
Nothing.