Chapter Twenty-Five
Time ticked by as I waited to find out what was so important that Blake called an emergency sister/brother meeting. They rarely happened, only in the case of a life in danger or…. "Important business!" as he put it. So I sat here on my couch, listening to various Youtube artists on my Spotify playlist, looking at the clock way too often. He said he'd be by at half past ten, and it was five til eleven. I was actually used to Blake being late, the only times he would be on time was if it had to do with photography.
"Why are you in your PJs? Get out of your PJs. Come on, we're going out. Don't roll your eyes at me, get your butt off that couch and go put on a dress or something. Do you even own a dress?"
The second Blake entered my apartment, it was like he had brought a tornado with him. Within seconds he was pulling my arm and literally pushing me towards my room.
"Why do I have to dress up for going out to dinner?" I whined as he started going through my closet. He was acting like a sister would who was preparing me for a date.
Wait.
"Just you and me right? No one else? You're not setting me up on a date are you? I'll kill you if you are." I huffed out as he forced jeans and one of my 'nice' shirts into my hands.
"No! Of course not. I just don't want to be embarrassed by my sister who doesn't know how to wear anything but black. Get dressed, we have to get going. I'm hungry." Blake grinned, and I could see that he had something up his sleeve just by the spark in his eyes. I knew better than to argue with him, though, he was probably just taking me to my favorite restaurant and my family was going to be there or something. Blake didn't have the ability to do surprises, he always failed horribly.
Like my eighteenth birthday when he decided to invite a bunch of my school friends to come over and I didn't show up because I had an interview for an internship with Mess. He basically hung out with fourteen teens for an hour before finally giving up. Yeah, he sucked at surprises.
So I did what he asked, pulling on the skinny jeans and the baby blue flowy top. It was a bit bright for me, but I decided against saying anything. He was set in his ways and there was no way I could get out of this. In about fifteen minutes, he had me in his car and he was driving quickly without muttering a word to me. He did have the radio on and was listening to very loud pop music. I sighed, tapping my finger against the door as I waited to find out why he was acting so weird.
The closer we got to our destination, the more I was sure I was right. This was the exact location of my favorite restaurant and I started to wonder if I had forgotten my birthday. It wouldn't be totally unlikely, I don't usually keep up with things like birthdays. I know my sisters and I know my brother's, but that's it. Though the longer I thought about it, I was certain that my birthday wasn't this month. There was no real reason that he would bring me out and make such a big deal out of going to dinner.
"Okay get out. I'll go park and then I'll meet you inside. We have reservations, just tell them 'Parker' and we should have a table already."
He had pulled in front of Chantel's, and seemed eager for me to get out. I rolled my eyes and got out, heading into the familiar lobby area. The lady at the podium was whispering to one of the waiters and she seemed excited. I ignored that and headed up to her and said quietly, "Parker?"
Her eyes widened considerably as she looked me up and down. The waiter who had been standing there, hurried off as he muttered under his breath. Jeez, what was with everyone acting weird today?
"Oh, yes, follow me Ms. Joelle."
I wanted to ask how she knew my first name when not once I said it out loud but I managed to convince myself it wouldn't even matter because Blake probably had put my full name as the reservation. We walked past where we usually sat and towards a corner, and I was confused about why we were going into such a hidden place. That's when I saw him.
The guy I had promised myself to completely forget about and act like I had never met. He was sitting at the table the girl was trying to get me to sit at. I stared at her before staring back at him and then staring at her again. She finally felt awkward enough to scurry away and I just continued to stare at where she used to stand.
"Why…" I shook my head in shock. "Why are you here?"
He was on his feet in a matter of seconds, reaching his hand out towards mine. I withdrew mine quickly, just trying to process all that was happening at the moment. He was dressed smartly, in dress pants and a button up shirt but the top four buttons were undone. He hadn't shaved in a while and he looked damn good. The Zayn I had tried to forget was now right in front of me, but he looked so much better than I had remembered. The definition of the jaw, the spark in the eyes, the way he always looked so serious.
"Don't leave. Please, let's just talk. Just sit and talk. Please?" Zayn begged, reaching once more for my hand and this time I didn't flinch away. Mine seemed to fit perfectly in his, soft skin touching soft skin. Everything in my brain screamed to run, to go find Blake and beat him up before demanding he take me home. To continue this life I had made for myself, but instead of doing what I knew I should, I let myself be persuaded into sitting at the table. Not once did he let go of my hand, instead he maneuvered himself to sit opposite me and then kept our hands on the edge of the table - like those cliche movies where they are all sappy holding hands and saying sappy love things to each other.
That's what snapped me out of the reverie and the beautiful dream I was having that this could end well, and I slowly took my hand back and placed it in my lap. "I don't have anything to say to you anymore, Zayn."
"That doesn't mean I don't. I have plenty to say to you, Joelle." Zayn's voice was on the verge of angry, but it all just seemed to mask the pain that he was trying his hardest to hide. I hated myself because I knew how he felt and I knew way more about him than I ever wanted to.
"Zayn, don't do this. Don't do this to me and don't do this to yourself. We were fine without each other," I lied, keeping my facial expression as blank as it could be.
"No. We're not okay on our own, why are you turning a blind eye to the pain you're in? We were happier together than we had ever been when we were alone, and you won't open your eyes to that. Why won't you see it?"
Silence ticked by before I stared straight into his eyes. "I see it and it scares me."
"Scared of being loved by someone? Or scared of being loved by me?" Zayn asked quietly.
"Love is vulnerable and I can't go through what so many have gone through before. I can't let myself be vulnerable."
"This isn't being vulnerable. This is letting someone see and accept you through all things, it doesn't make you weak. It makes you stronger."
My teeth nibbled on my lip as I looked at this man who had changed everything I had ever known. Was it time that I let go of all that I taught myself to believe and think? Was it time to let someone in?
Hey, so if any of you happen to know Aaron Tveit can you tell him that I love him and would like to have him sing to me 24/7? Yeah thanks. If you do that, I'll write you as many stories as you want me too.
Yeah I've been obsessed with watching musicals online lately. Next to Normal, Catch Me If You Can, Cinderella (the better version), Matilda, and Billy Elliot in the last three days. Is that normal? Nopeeeee.
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