So let me catch my breath
Before you steal it once again
Only the softest whispers, only the gentlest touches, only the swiftest of kisses. That's how lovers communicate in the morning, especially if the lovers were people who aren't used to affection. Fingertips brushing over the other's thigh, lips tracing the previous night's lovebites, eyelids fluttering over an exposed collarbone: that's what mornings should be like.
Yoongi had woken up due to Jimin's absence. At first, he panicked: he felt around the bed, and when he felt a serious lack of Mochi he bolted up straight, looking around. His mind was still fuzzy and a part of him was scared that it was all a dream, because how would someone like him ever end up with someone like Jimin? However, when he recognised Jimin's room, he calmed down. He calmed down even more when Jimin walked in, holding two cups in his hands.
He smiled sweetly at Yoongi, not needing to utter a word. Yoongi took his cup of coffee from Jimin with a muffled “Thank you,” before taking a sip and putting the cup down next to him. Jimin did the same, sipping his tea before placing it down. Yoongi then took Jimin's hand and pulled the boy closer, forcing him to lay down. Jimin giggled softly, his voice raspy from having woken up a short while ago, and nuzzled his face in Yoongi's neck.
Yoongi ran his fingers up the inside of the hoodie Jimin was wearing. “Is this my hoodie?” Yoongi asked, cocking an eyebrow up. Jimin bit his lip and nodded, smiling widely.
“Yes, but it's mine now. Nothing you can do about it!” He grinned, and Yoongi just rolled his eyes. He pressed his lips softly to Jimin's nose. Jimin wrinkled his nose, and Yoongi's eyes softened at the cute sight. He ran his hand back down then cupped Jimin's cheek in his hand, his thumb rubbing affectionately over Jimin's cheekbone. The pinkette pressed his leg between the ravenettes', their feet rubbing together. “Hyung, did you sleep well?” Jimin asked softly.
Yoongi just nodded, his eyes falling shut again as the urge to sleep overwhelmed him. He yawned widely, pressing his face into Jimin's neck. Jimin giggled, pushing Yoongi away, who just held on even tighter. Yoongi groaned irritatedly, and opted to rather put a leg over Jimin's hip, holding the boy promptly in place. Jimin huffed in defeat. “Hah. I win.”
“Hyung, I have school! I have to get up, get ready, and walk to school...” Jimin leaned his head back and pouted at Yoongi, and Yoongi knew he couldn't get in the way of his boyfriend's education. After all, Yoongi hadn't been able to finish highschool himself, and he just wanted the best for his boyfriend.
Yoongi sighed heavily and sat up, taking his coffee off the bedside table and sipping it. “Only if I get to walk you to school,” Yoongi said nonchalantly as he looked at the yellow curtains, which only seemed to highlight the sunlight shining into the window. Yoongi squinted, muttering angrily under his breath. “My apartment's getting black curtains.”
“Curtains as dark as your soul?” Jimin joked, speaking in a heavy voice, and laid his head down on his boyfriend's lap. Yoongi had to roll his eyes.
“First of all: fuck off. Second of all: these bright colours are bad for my eyes.” Yoongi played absent-mindedly with Jimin's fluffy pink hair, his eyes scanning the room. Jimin closed his eyes, toying with the fabric of Yoongi's pants.
“You don't even have a clean change of clothes. You can borrow from me,” Jimin muttered. “Oh, and Hyung? About yesterday...”
Yoongi's throat felt dry as he swallowed his coffee. “Oh, yeah. That.” He sighed heavily, placing the cup down next to him. “I met up with Jihoon, as I told you before. And he...” Yoongi bit his lip, contemplating what to say for a moment. His mom was sick, but that would only cause Jimin to worry, and Yoongi didn't want him to worry this early in the morning, or this early in the relationship. Besides, Yoongi doesn't know the facts yet. He'll try and find out more, and until then he'll just keep it to himself. He can handle it. He's used to handling it on his own. “Jihoon just said that he talked to mom, is all. Nothing much. He started flirting soon after, and when he tried to make a move I shook him off.”
I punched his face, is a more accurate description.
Jimin sat up, turned Yoongi's face to him and pressed their lips together. The coffee on Yoongi's lips warmed Jimin's heart. They kissed sweetly for a few seconds before pulling apart. Jimin's hands remained on Yoongi's cheeks as he looked into his eyes. “Well, you are mine now. And I'm yours.” He smiled widely, his eyes turning into crescents before he reached over for his tea and sat back. “Sorry for overreacting. I...I felt jealous and hurt, you know? I've never been good with handling my emotions... You said you needed me yesterday, was it because you felt bad?”
Yoongi nodded. It was kind of true, but not the whole reason. Yoongi wasn't lying, he was just hiding how he really felt. It's okay, though. As Jimin said: he wasn't good with handling emotions.
“Yeah, I felt bad about Jihoon. The most fucked-up thing is that I have to see him again, because he is my only connection to my mom.” Yoongi ruffled his hair, the frustration causing his bones to itch. His leg started shaking, a nervous habit of his, but Jimin placed his hand on Yoongi's thigh and his leg stopped shaking.
“Next time, don't go alone. Take any one of us with, okay?” Jimin pecked Yoongi's cheek, downed his luke warm tea and jumped up off of bed. He went over to his closet and searched around for an outfit for Yoongi, throwing out all the black clothing he owned (which, truthfully, wasn't a lot). “There! An outfit for you! You can go shower while I get dressed for school.”
-
When Yoongi arrived at home, he was bamboozled by Jin and Namjoon who both immediately marched over to him as soon as he closed the door behind him. He looked up at them with his signature poker-face, not phased in the least by their curious faces.
“So?” Jin asked excitedly, standing on his toes like an excited child. Yoongi rolled his eyes and walked past, shrugging as he did so. Jin whined and followed him, Namjoon on his heels. “Yoongi! Listen to your Hyung! Tell me what happened! Are you two okay now? What happened at the bar? IS JIMIN STILL A VIRGIN?”
“Aish! Why do you guys always expect the worse of me?” Yoongi asked , clearly annoyed. He opened the fridge and searched around for something to drink. “Ain't we got no juice? We have so much jam, but no fucking juice.”
“Don't avoid the question, Yoongi-hyung,” Namjoon spoke, holding up a box of juice behind him. Yoongi turned around and reached for the juice, but Namjoon held his arm upright, leaving the juice out of the shorter man's reach. Yoongi frowned and crossed his arms over his chest.
“Not funny, Namjoon. Jin, tell your boyfriend to give me the juice.” Yoongi jumped up, trying to take the juice from Namjoon, but he dodged Yoongi easily.
“Not until you tell us what happened, Yoongi. Sit your attitude-having-ass down,” Jin pulled a chair closer and Yoongi sighed in defeat, taking the seat. Namjoon also sat down, keeping the juice on the table next to him, and Jin promptly sat down on Namjoon's lap.
“Okay. He's my boyfriend now, happy? And he's still a virgin. Does that answer all your questions? Can I have my juice now?” Yoongi reached over for the juice, but Jin slapped Yoongi's hand away. Yoongi looked at Jin with a challenged expression, but that face soon turned confused as Jin took off his pink slipper and started hitting Yoongi with it. Yoongi used his arms to shield his face. “Hyung, what the fuck?” He asked.
“That boy is still a child!” Jin exclaimed, holding his slipper up high. “He's the definition of innocence! He...something isn't right at his home life, and from what I can tell, he's barely handling that! I've met his parents before, Yoongi. You haven't, so you won't know, but if they find out about the two of you...” Jin's eyes welled up as he was reminded of how he and Namjoon had to hide their relationship at times. “He isn't ready for this. You aren't either!”
That struck a nerve.
Yoongi stood up: shoulders square, jaw set, his eyes narrowed. He bit down on his teeth as he took a few deep breaths to calm himself. “You don't know a thing about how I'm feeling-” Yoongi started, and Jin gripped his slipper hard.
Thankfully, Namjoon stepped in.
Namjoon took the slipper from Jin's hand and gently led his boyfriend aside, before standing in front of Yoongi. Jin sat down defeated, huffing angrily. “You're right, we don't know how you're feeling. Jin-hyung, it's obvious that what's between Yoongi and Jimin is special. They seem to be what the other one needs, and this is what Yoongi's writing says.”
Jin looked up at Yoongi, and this time his expression was filled with genuine concern. “Yoongi, honey, this...this is still so early though. So rushed. You haven't had a romantic relationship since Jihoon, and we all know how that turned out. Jimin is new to all of this too. He's a teenager that's head-over-heels, and you're still busy recovering. Are you ready?”
Yoongi wasn't sure.
However, he didn't want to think about that uncertainty. Yoongi knows he always overthinks things, but Jimin was the one thing he didn't want to overthink. He wanted to experience Jimin, and to learn to love him at whatever pace his heart decides to. “Jin. Let me be happy for once. For the first time, I have something that makes it all worth it. You understand, don't you? So, let me be fucking happy.”
His tone wasn't harsh, instead, he sounded a bit scared. There was a quiver in his voice that betrayed the bit of uncertainty he was trying his best to hide. He looked Jin straight in the eye, and Jin could see the surge of heavy emotions Yoongi was forced to be dealing with. The last time Yoongi felt heavy emotions like those was when he was using, and now he had to deal with them with a sober mind. He wasn't sure what he was feeling, or what he should be feeling, and the only feeling that made sense to him was Jimin. Just, Jimin in general. The way Jimin made Yoongi feel was the most real emotions he has felt in a while, and he would cling to that no matter what.
Jin leaned forward and hugged Yoongi. “Just...take it slow, okay? Love with urgency, but not with haste. He's still a kid...” Yoongi patted Jin's back awkwardly and Jin sat back, wiping at his eyes. “N-now let me make some breakfast! We have to go to your apartment later, so eat up!”
Jin shooed the other two out of the kitchen, and when they were sure Jin was out of earshot, Namjoon looked at Yoongi seriously. “Yoongi, I can tell you're uncertain, and that's okay. Don't force yourself to feel any way, just be true to your heart.” Namjoon put his hand on Yoongi's shoulder, bending down a bit to be at eye-level with him. Yoongi took a deep, shaky breath, taking in the words of his close friend. He kept his cool-guy expression, not wanting to let Namjoon know how scared he actually was.
He decided right then and there that whatever happens, and whatever choice he has to make, he will always do what will end up being the best for Jimin. If it meant the worse, he wanted to be able to let Jimin grow into the best version of himself. Yoongi wanted to be the someone he needed when he was younger.
Let Jimin experience life.
Let Jimin grow into a strong adult.
Let Jimin experience love.
Let Jimin become the person someone else might need in the future.