Chapter Twenty-Two
There are moments in time when you feel like everything around you simply goes away.
These are moments when the feel of the clothes against your skin disappears, the voices of the people around you fade, and the ground seems to fall out from beneath your feet. Instead of the press of external sensation, your entire being focuses in on the beat of your heart and the rasp of air in your lungs. Your limbs tingle. Your mouth goes dry.
The air buffets at your eardrums and eyeballs but you can't so much as blink to clear the cobwebs because everything inside of you—every doubt, every assurance, every insecurity, every confidence—becomes sucked into a vacuum of pure nothing.
This sense of nothing and of emptiness is the embodiment of the deepest kind of shock, the kind of shock you only feel when someone voices a possibility so outlandish, so unexpected, you can do nothing more than merely stare in blank, open, unfeeling confusion.
The first time I experienced a shock that deep, I'd been very, very young, four or five, perhaps, or sometime in between... a little while before my father had run off, that much I could remember. It had been my first day of school as well as my first exposure to the cruelty of other children.
Back then, my mother had escorted me into my classroom by the hand, and I remember feeling excited by the colorful posters on the walls and the toys in their ordered boxes, and also for our teacher, who had been young and chubby and kind.
I'd been the first one there that morning, so the teacher had showed me to my desk herself, and when Mom had said she was leaving I'd barely felt homesick for her at all. I'd been too distracted by my new school supplies, my teacher, and the sensation of anticipatory happiness at the thought of making friends for the very first time.
After all, both my teacher and my mother had expressed the idea that as soon as other the kids arrived, we'd all be as thick as thieves.
Of course, they'd been wrong.
I'd been abnormally pale, dressed all in black high SPF sun-proofed clothing from head to toe with large sunglasses and a big, goofy sunhat. Back then, I'd also had trouble breathing properly due to my underdeveloped lung, so I'd had mechanical tubes in my nose to help with that, and for my heart problems, I'd been hooked up to a transportable machine.
The hope had been that my poor health conditions would even themselves out as I grew older. I'd already had twelve surgeries on my lung before the age of five, and while the end result had been a positive one in my case, back then, when I'd still been suffering the most, it had been very hard for people not to see me as something other than a symbol of negativity.
I'd stood out, and not in a good way.
Overlooking my appearance and apparel had been like trying to overlook a person's nose. It couldn't be done, it'd been apparent and literally impossible to hide.
From almost the minute my classmates had started to arrive, I'd known that something wasn't right. Each child I'd seen had looked not at me, but at my clothes, and the huge hat, and the big sunglasses, and the tubes, and the wires, and the heart machine—their eyes had lingered on it all before they'd been distracted by a parent or our teacher, who'd taken their hands and led them to their seats, all while the kids shot me glances over their shoulders.
I'd smiled at them to show I was friendly, but few were able to look away from the rest.
I'd never faced that before.
Though I hadn't known it at the time, I'd later recalled how my mother and father hardly ever let me play with other kids before kindergarten. Going out in public, I'd always been cloistered in their sheltering presence and when people had stared they'd distracted me, turned my attention in another direction... but that morning at school, I hadn't had anyone to perform that service.
I'd been alone. Bare. Vulnerable. I'd felt self conscious for the first time in my life, and I'd had no idea what to do with that feeling. When a girl had sat in her assigned seat to my left, I'd tried to act like I didn't feel spotlit at all and turned to her when her parents left.
"Hello," I'd said, smiling my biggest smile. "I'm Aerin. What's your name?"
Eyes on the wiring and my heart machine, she'd said, "I didn't know robots could talk."
And the world around me had fallen away.
Just like it had fallen away a few moments ago.
I was going through that terrible feeling again, only this time, there was anger behind it.
I was livid... beyond livid.
Actually, fuck the description of being livid, I was literally borderline psychotic with fury.
"I'm going to kill him," I hissed through my grinding fangs, breathing in and out with my fists clenched and my face warped with the purest of wrath. "I'm going to shove my hand right up his muscled body-builder ass and rip out all of his fucking intestines, consequences be damned!"
"Jeez, c-calm down, I'm sure it was an accident," Kyle said a little nervously from where he stood a good few feet away; his hands were raised placatingly, but his face was tight. "There had to have been some sort of misunderstanding--"
"Misunderstanding?! Almost all of my clothes are shredded!" I screamed at him, whipping around and burning holes into his face; red spots covered my vision, blinding me as I angrily roared, "not including the fact my phone is cracked, two of my consoles are damaged, there's a long scratch on one of my disks, and my photo albums are MISSING! WHERE ARE THEY?!"
Okay, yeah, I was pissed, but this little outburst would make more sense if I explained it.
You see, after I'd unpacked my game consoles, I'd noticed several chips and scratches on them, which would have been fine if I hadn't opened the suitcases holding my clothes and discovered that they had literally been ripped up and destroyed by someone with big, sharp claws.
After that, I'd found out that some of my game disks had been mistreated, and my phone had literally been thrown or something since there was a chip in the case and the camera lens was just as busted as the screen, which had a nasty spiderweb of cracks.
Worst of all, my photo albums and laptop weren't even inside the suitcases.
Meaning, someone had taken them.
As I've said before, I'm a territorial man and I'm very possessive of my things, but my photo albums went far beyond that. They weren't my possessions, they were my memories... the only things I had left of my family and all the things I'd given up but wanted to remember.
My fists shook as I glared the redhead down.
"I-I don't know," Kyle said, taking a deep breath and finally lowering his arms, "and I don't know how it happened, but I'll find out. I promise."
"What good will that do me?" I asked, closing my eyes and breathing through my nose. "Some of this stuff is over fifty years old and most of it is literally irreplaceable! Now, I have no clothes, and no laptop to order new clothes online since someone took it, but let's be real, that wouldn't even matter since I don't even know where the fuck in North Carolina I really am! UGH!"
I sat down on the bed and buried my face in my hands. I tried to calm down, but I was mad, so mad, and it wasn't fair. It was like they were trying to strip me of everything I cared about.
"Hey... it'll be all right, okay?"
"No, it won't, I can't fucking do this," I instantly retorted, digging my nails into my forehead. "I'm packing my shit and I'm going back to Michigan whether they like it or not. I don't care if they come after me, I'd rather die closer to home than stay here and let them walk all over me."
Kyle's eyes widened and he immediately limped over, setting his hand on my shoulder.
"Don't," he quietly commanded, but when I stiffened, he paused and said, "don't be rash, I mean. I told you I'd find out what happened and I meant it. I don't think Bash would have allowed anyone to do this to your stuff, so first things' first, let's see what we can do to fix this."
"Fix this?" I asked, letting out a small snort. "Nobody can fix this, not even you."
"Yes, I can," he countered, firmly. "Come. We'll head down together."
Confusion immediately overwrote the anger and I lowered my hands so I could stare at him.
"Together?" I asked, brow furrowing. "You're serious? You're really going to try and help me?"
"Didn't I already say I would?" Kyle asked, raising a single ginger brow. "I told you earlier, I don't have a problem with you being a vampire. Heck, you could be a ball of slime or a demon or even a banshee and I wouldn't care as long as you're a friendly and relatively good person."
His words calmed me a little. I didn't really know why, but I figured it had to do with the fact that someone was finally hearing what I had to say and even offering to right an injustice that had been done to me. He held out his hand with a smile, and although I swallowed hard, I took it, allowing him to pull me upright.
"Thank you," I said a little more quietly. "The clothes can be replaced, but the photo albums, and my computer... I need them. I have things on that laptop I'll never be able to get back if it gets destroyed. It's my livelihood."
"Then let's figure out who did this before we go," Kyle said, and to my confusion he hobbled past me and started digging through my clothes. "It'll be easy since I have a good nose, you see."
"Okay," I droned, watching him; to my muted fascination, he grabbed one of my shredded sweaters and pulled it to his face, inhaling deeply and breathing in air through the fabric. He stiffened, then sagged and set the article of clothing down, shaking his head.
"Dammit."
Confused by his reaction, I raised an eyebrow. "So, do you know?"
"Yep," he muttered, shrugging at me. "Let's go."
Without another word, he started limping for the door, and although I scratched my head in confusion, I didn't waste any time following him out of the room and down the hall. I stayed close to his back as he led me down the stairs, gaze wandering as we walked the halls of the enormous manor, stopping by many empty rooms and peering inside before continuing on.
I was fascinated when I caught sight of what looked like an enormous ballroom with gorgeous crystal chandeliers and reflective marble floors. I looked around when we passed it by, still feeling dazed, and as we walked my eyes continued wandering over the plush surroundings.
The inside of this house really reminded me of something out of a story.
It held such mystery. So many people must have walked its halls, but had never given it much thought since it was old. The glowing chandeliers above me flickered dimly, and the grey carpets were a bit bland, and yet, it all seemed almost welcoming.
And then, I was led around a corner and found myself looking at the familiar entry hall.
The huge double doors that had been busted off their hinges had been removed from the floor, leaving the cozy sitting room with the fireplace open to the rest of the house. Kyle wasted little time limping over to it and peered inside; he instantly looked back at me and nodded.
"They're all in here," he said softly. "Come."
I swallowed a little apprehensively when he slipped inside, but I steeled my resolve and walked into the room. Sure enough, everyone else was already there, including Sebastian and Richard, both of whom I avoided making eye contact with for obvious reasons.
The temperature in the room was uncomfortably high, but it wasn't any surprise since the enormous fireplace was once again blazing brightly. A series of growls filled the air when I moved closer to Kyle's side, but Diane simply set her chin on her palm with her eyebrows raised.
"Kyle," she said in a soft voice, "did you bring the vampire here?"
"I did," he chimed, nodding.
"Okay," she said, nodding thoughtfully. "Um, why? And what were you doing with him?"
"Getting along," the ginger said, smiling faintly. "You know, making peace."
"Making... peace?" Richard hissed, immediately lunging upright. "Kyle, you--"
"Richard," he said in a soft, crooning voice, giving him a pained look; the bald man's mouth snapped shut and he stared, eyes far more attentive. "Why did you do it? It was petty and actually rather cruel of you after what's already happened, so I want to know why."
A peculiar expression crossed his scarred features, made only more peculiar by the way the other werewolves turned to look at him in puzzlement. When he cast a glare at me, I knew, in that moment, that he was the one responsible for destroying my things.
"I don't know what you're talking about," he said quietly, meeting the redhead's eyes.
"You know exactly what I'm talking about," Kyle murmured, tilting his head; fiery hair fell across one eye as they stared each other down. "Why did you do it?"
The bald man immediately looked away, jaw tight.
I almost exploded and started yelling, but Leo finally leaned forward.
"I'm growing a bit irritated with the riddles," he lazily drawled. "What's this about, Kyle?"
"All of Aerin's belongings were heavily damaged," the ginger said simply, "and he no longer has anything to wear because... well, Richard? Care to explain like I asked?"
A low rumble left the stocky man's throat.
"Fine, I destroyed them," he hissed; everyone seemed a little startled. "I shredded his clothes with my claws as a message that he's not welcome here."
"That was not your place," Sebastian said, immediately narrowing his eyes. "I told you to search through the suitcases for anything dangerous, but you had no right to destroy his belongings."
I was caught completely blind by that since I hadn't been expecting Sebastian to defend me.
"This is not that thing's place!" Richard spat back, jabbing a finger right at me. "I will never be able to accept your decision to let that bloodsucker reside here. You know why I hate vampires."
He stared at me through narrowed eyes, suspicion and animosity lying naked in his expression.
I didn't care. I only wanted to know where my computer and photo albums were.
"Richard," Kyle said in a low voice, limping forward and putting a hand on his shoulder. "I don't think Aerin means us any ill will. He's been nothing but cooperative, and he clearly knows the difference between right and wrong. Pointing fingers at him won't solve any of our problems."
"I agree," Tiffany said, casting a frown at Richard. "Destroying his stuff was totally wrong. If you'd ever done that to me, mark my words you'd have even more scars than you do right now."
"Why did you do it?" Kyle repeated. "Tell me."
"Because that thing is a monster," the bald man hissed. "Its scent disgusts and infuriates me."
My heart sped up so quickly that to me, it felt almost as though it had stopped beating altogether. Slowly lifting my head, I stared at him through spotting vision.
"I'm sorry... for all the stress I'm causing you," I said quietly, and everyone turned to stare at me with wary irritation and confusion; I ignored them and took a step closer, "but it's not even the ripped clothes, or the dented electronics, or my broken phone... where are my photo albums?!"
Those amber eyes narrowed and a sneer curled his scarred nose.
"What's it matter to you?" he asked in a frigid manner; I flinched and backed up when he started advancing on me. "After all the crap I've already been putting up with... you actually have the audacity to question me about what I decide to do? I'm already letting you live."
"Those photo albums are i-important to me," I stuttered, staring at him warily when he paused, cocking his head. "They're very important to me. Please, give them back."
"You want them back?" he asked, leaning down and glaring deep into my eyes. "How bad?"
"Please," I whispered, tightening my jaw. "Give them back to me."
"And what if I don't want to?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. "What if I decide to keep them?"
"Richard," Leo said lowly, giving him a warning stare. "Enough."
"No, it's not enough," the bald man sneered, staring at me for a very long second; his narrowed eyes turned bright yellow and shone brilliantly for a few moments, but then something flashed across his expression and they suddenly darkened to an almost normal-looking brown.
A smirk slid across his black-bearded mouth as he rose to his full height.
"Richard," Kyle said softly, brows furrowing when he pivoted and swaggered over to the couch he'd been sitting on when we'd walked in. "Come on, just give him the albums back."
"You mean these albums?" he asked, pulling two familiar blue cloth-bound books out from underneath the couch cushion; my heart leapt and I gasped, stepping forward, but his face warped into an evil mask of hate and he bared his fangs, snarling at me. I froze, shoulders bunching, eyes wider than marbles. "Stay put, leech. All right?"
"Dick," Sebastian said, finally rising to his feet. "Give them back."
"Why should I listen to you?" Richard sneered, waving the albums in both hands. "After all, you said it yourself earlier... this little bloodsucking leech has drawn your wolf in, and you're having trouble fighting against your instincts. He shouldn't even be getting special treatment."
A warning growl came from Sebastian's throat.
The others in the room seemed equal parts shocked and alarmed by what was happening.
"Dick, stop," Jun, the Korean guy, said seriously. "Don't provoke Bash."
"Yeah, this isn't... I mean, I don't agree with this situation, but you're taking it too far," Cassidy said a little uncertainly, rapidly looking back and forth between them. "Calm down."
"Calm down?" Richard asked in a robotic tone. "When hell freezes."
"Stop!" I finally protested, stepping even closer. "Why do you hate me so much?! Is me being a vampire really worth all this fighting and drama?! What did I ever do?!"
"What did you ever do?" he mocked, turning his eyes on me. "How about you look in the mirror. Look at your fangs. And when you do, know that its because of filthy little fuckers with fangs like yours that I lost everything I loved before I ended up here. You love these photo albums, right?"
I stared at him, hands shaking.
"Yes, I do," I whispered. "Please give them back."
"No," he said, and another smile slid across his mouth. "I'd rather watch you experience what it feels like to see what you love burn to ashes before your eyes."
And then, in what looked like slow motion to my stunned eyes, he threw my photo albums into the fire.
"NO!" I wailed, instantly bolting for the fireplace; someone caught me by the arm, and then there was chaos. Sebastian and Leo leapt at Richard, and I saw them struggling, and before long they were shifting into those bipedal beast forms yet again. "NO! NO! GET THEM OUT!"
"Stay back!" a female voice cried. "Stop struggling! If you go over there--"
"MY ALBUMS!" I shrieked, watching as the cloth caught fire and started peeling back, melting under the heat. "NO!"
But I couldn't get free. I could only watch, screaming, as my childhood, my parents, my sister, my memories of when I was still a happy person burned. My eyes stopped seeing, my mind went completely blank, and my heart...
It was cracking.
Right down the middle.
The brawl broke up moments later, and I heard arguing, but I could only stare at the burning books. Watching them be devoured by heat, blackening, destroyed.
"What were you thinking?!" I heard Kyle shouting. "Those albums weren't yours, Richard!"
"The leech got what it deserved!" he snarled back. "I'm satisfied with how this turned out!"
"Dick," Leo growled, "you dirty mother fu--"
"Aerin," the female voice said, and I recognized it as Tiffany's; the hand holding me back slackened, but I couldn't move, I was frozen, staring at my burning memories, unresponsive to the world. My mouth was trembling, my eyes were watering, and my head had gone so light that I felt like I would fall over at any second. Taking in a deep breath, I tried to ask her to let me go... but only a watery croak slipped out of my mouth.
The arguing werewolves fell silent and everyone turned to stare when I tried again because the same unpleasant sound escaped my lips.
My face screwed up and I dropped my head, hiding my eyes, fighting back the sting in them, but I couldn't stop it and the dam inside me burst; lifting my free hand to my eyes, I let out a shaky cough, which made everyone around me twitch, and then I let out another... and another... trying to fight it off, but I just couldn't keep it locked away anymore.
I coughed one last time and then, I couldn't hide it, I flat out burst into tears.
Tiffany let go of me as if she'd been scalded when my legs buckled and I collapsed, crying hysterically, and everyone immediately backed away. The woman looked rather startled when I buried my face in my hands and pressed my forehead against the ground.
My shoulders heaved as I cried, but I no longer cared.
I had lost the only connection I still had to my family. I had lost all ties to my past. With the burning of those books, the remnants of my happiness had been destroyed, and I couldn't take it anymore. The pain of having absolutely nothing left killed me in a way that nothing else could.
"So, Dick... do you feel better now?" I heard someone, Diane, I thought it was, ask. "Was your revenge everything you'd dreamed it would be?"
I heard no response over my own sobbing, but I didn't particularly care.
"Looks like you got what you wanted," Leo said quietly. "Hope it was worth it."
Again, no response.
A hand came to rest on my back as someone sank down beside me.
"Hey, hey, it'll be all right," Tiffany said soothingly, "come on, don't cry, okay?"
I couldn't stop; I squeezed my middle, feeling like if I didn't I would break apart and shatter into a million pieces, sobbing hysterically into the floor. I curled up further, burying my face in my knees, squeezing myself as small as I possibly could. It hurt. It hurt so damn much.
The hate I felt for that man went beyond anything I'd ever experienced.
All I could do was cry and I did exactly that until the person consoling me slid their hand between the gap of my waist and forced me into bending upright. I coughed when I was pushed into a sitting position and two arms went beneath my pits from behind.
"Come on. Up we go."
I was tugged to my feet and stood on shaking legs as an arm came around me. The world was blurry, and tears were still streaming down my burning cheeks like waterfalls, but I was so tired and upset that I didn't bother trying to figure out what was what.
I was steered out of the room without a word.
I swore, though, that in the background I heard Sebastian let out a vile curse.
It didn't matter though.
After that, nothing did.