Taehyung's heart hurt a little more each time he saw that Jimin was reading but not responding to his messages or that he was purposefully avoiding Taehyung in the hallways and walking with as many people as possible to escape being confronted by Taehyung.
Tae knew he screwed up, but he was tired of being ignored by one of his favorite people in the whole world.
So he waited by Jimin's locker, knowing that he'd eventually have to put his books away and grab his lunch.
Sure enough, just a few minutes before lunch time, Jimin was walking down the hallway toward his locker, talking with Hyungwon and Jongup, and as it happened, their conversation distracted Jimin to the point that he didn't notice Tae until it was too late to avoid him.
Jimin stopped short in front of his locker, making uncomfortable eye contact with Tae for a second before looking down, then left, then right, then any generic place that wasn't at Taehyung.
Tae winced but thought, I deserve this.
"Jimin, please, just listen to me-"
Jimin pursed his lips, saying nothing, but his disapproval was enough to cut Tae off.
Tae took another breath, shooting a glance at Jongup, who also avoided his eyes, before looking back at Tae and saving that argument for another time. "Look, Jimin, I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings, okay? I just thought-"
"Of c-course it would hurt m-my feelings!" Jimin stuttered out angrily, and a few people turned to see what was happening. Tae flinched, noticing how tightly Jimin's hands were clenched and knowing that it was 100% his own fault. "W-what d-did you think, that I w-would n-never figure out who it w-was?"
Taehyung looked down at the ground in shame. "I'm really sorry, Jimin," he said softly. "I just wanted you to be happy..."
"There are other w-ways t-to make s-someone happy than t-to invent a f-fake p-person to p-pretend to l-love them!" Jimin said, his speech getting worse as his emotions rose.
Taehyung opened his mouth, still looking down, before he looked up to meet Jimin's eyes. "I know, okay, I was stupid, it was a mistake."
"Y-you were a t-total asshole!" Jimin yelled, and Tae couldn't do anything but nod his head.
"I know, it was an asshole thing to do, but I really thought that it would make you happy somehow," he said.
"Y-you c-could have j-just bought me a c-cookie! Y-you d-didn't have to p-put fake l-letters from a p-person who never existed in m-my locker for w-weeks on end!"
Tae sank down a bit. He'd known it would be painful confronting Jimin, but it had been painful when things had been left unsaid. He had to believe that this was the best way. However painful it was.
"I just remember you saying that you thought no one would ever love you, and I tried to tell you it wasn't true but you didn't believe me, so I wanted you to know that you were wrong, that someone could love you just as you are."
There was a moment of silence before Jimin spoke. "H-how long w-were you g-going to keep it up?" he asked. "The r-rest of the y-year? Until w-we g-graduated? W-what would h-have happened if I'd f-fallen in l-love, T-Tae? W-what then? Was that p-part of your p-plan? T-to b-break m-my heart?"
Tae frowned, wanting Jimin to just understand that he'd done it all for him, to make him happy, to make him feel loved. Of course he didn't want to hurt Jimin. "I was going to stop soon," he said. "Eventually." He swallowed. "I just meant to write one to cheer your day up, but you looked so happy when you found it and read it, and I wanted to keep making you happy, Jimin. That was it. I didn't want to hurt your feelings."
"D-do y-you know what everyone w-was s-saying?" Jimin asked, his eyes watering, and he turned his head to look over his shoulder, unable to look at Tae anymore.
Hyungwon gently pushed Jimin's head onto his shoulder before taking over the job, speaking softly but firmly. "Kids from our class found out that Jimin had a secret admirer that turned out to be fake. They didn't know that it was you. They thought that it was someone trying to make fun of Jimin. And of course they all harassed him about it because they're immature idiots who like to make people feel horrible. People have been sending Jimin notes in class, addressed from his 'secret admirer.' It's all some big joke. They think it's funny." Hyungwon's eyes seemed to never blink as they stared calmly into Taehyung's own. "The things they write in the notes aren't funny, Taehyung. They're mean. All because someone found out that Jimin was upset because he'd been getting notes from a secret admirer that turned out to be fake. That's all people know. They don't know that you were just trying to cheer him up one day or make him feel better. They think that someone else is playing pranks on Jimin, and that makes it more acceptable for the rest of them to do so, to justify their behavior."
Taehyung opened his mouth but Hyungwon tilted his head, raising his eyebrow. "It doesn't matter what your intentions were. The outcome is the same. It doesn't matter that you tried to make Jimin happy, because he's not happy right now. He's sad, he's fed up with the stupid pricks who fill up this high school, and whether he wants to say it or not, he's upset that you two have been at odds over this." Jimin tensed, but Hyungwon patted his head. "So what are you doing to do about it, Taehyung?"
Hearing all of Hyungwon's words, the side of the story that he hadn't even thought to consider, Taehyung had no idea what he could possibly do to fix all the damage he'd done.
It was true; it had been a stupid decision of his, but he'd started writing secret admirer notes for Jimin and leaving them in his locker to make Jimin feel like there was someone in the school who had a crush on him. Taehyung had thought that it would give Jimin more confidence and, although he'd never admit it, Taehyung thought that maybe if Jimin felt better about himself, his stutter would get better.
Tae slowly lowered himself to the ground and sat on his knees, bowing deeply. "Jimin, I'm really sorry. I swear, I just wanted to help you. I'm sorry I was so stupid that I didn't consider how you might be hurt by my actions."
It was silent for so long that Tae thought that maybe they'd all left, but then he heard Jimin's voice.
"If you weren't so b-busy trying to f-fix me, you'd realize that a s-secret admirer isn't what I n-need to make m-me happy, i-idiot," Jimin said, and Tae looked up.
"Am I forgiven?" Tae asked hopefully, and Jimin crossed his arms, looking away before sticking his lips out and nodding.
Tae scrambled up and hugged Jimin tightly, feeling Jimin tense before wrapping his arms around him gently and patting his back. "I'm really really really sorry and I promise I won't do it again and I'm really really really happy that you forgave me and please stop leaving my messages on read because it's really really really annoying and Kookie keeps making fun of me and-"
Jimin pulled away, chopping Tae on the head. "S-stop talking," he said. "Y-you're going to g-give me a headache."
Tae grinned, feeling like everything was good again. Not perfect, because he'd screwed up and he couldn't make up for that entirely, but certainly better than being ignored.
He accidentally looked to the left and briefly made eye contact with Jongup, but then Tae looked back at Jimin, smiling at him, and ignored the other boy.
It was another topic for another time, one that would only upset Jimin right now, and Tae couldn't afford to upset him so quickly.
But he'd bring it up again in time, as he'd done many times before, because of course Tae couldn't be wrong about Jongup, could he?
Of course he knew what was best for Jimin, didn't he?
so many updates today o-o i just had an urge to write. angst always makes me more proliferate :)
also vmin