Please excuse any mistakes or grammatical errors.
Daniella
Thanks to my mom having to come back to California with us, the whole "mile high club" thing didn't happen between Nadia and me. Aniya and I shared a row with our mom while Jayla and Nadia sat on a row with this random old man.
My mom already knew what was up with Nadia and me and she wasn't letting it go down. I don't get how she always knows what's going on. It's annoying sometimes.
The reason why my mom had to come with us is because Aniya is transferring to my school. They got most of her stuff sent to the school over the break, but my mom had some other papers to sign and people that she needed to speak to in person since the transfer was pretty last minute.
I was glad Aniya was transferring to my school because I wouldn't have liked the idea of her being alone at a different school. Even though she's older than me, I feel protective of her. She is my sister after all, so I guess this is a normal feeling.
Not to mention how bad I want her and Jayla to get together. I know without a doubt that Aniya likes Jayla. I know Jayla is still salty over the whole Mya thing and she has every right to be, but Aniya isn't the blame for that. Aniya and Mya are two totally different people and I feel like Aniya and Jayla would be a good match. Far better than Jayla and Mya would have been. Not to be an asshole, but I'm so happy things didn't work out between them. I want them both to be happy, but they wouldn't have worked out.
Aniya and Jayla on the other hand, they'd not only workout, but they'd be so freaking cute. I just like the whole ironic thing they have going on. What I mean by that it how the roles are reversed according to what would be expected by just looking at them.
Aniya, even though she appears to be more feminine style wise, has a more dominant role in their "non" relationship. Jayla on the other hand might appear to be the dominant one since her clothes give her a more masculine appearance, but that just isn't the case. I'm sure she was dominant in other relationships or situation-ships, but that's not the case when it comes to Aniya and her. I find that cool. They aren't what you'd expect.
Hopefully going to the same school will force them to get to know each other even more and then they'll see how great they are for each other.
I'm a proud Janiya shipper. Hell, I might need to be the captain since Jayla's ass is playing games with my sister's feelings.
Anyway, enough about them.
My mom wasn't going back home until tomorrow, so she was going to take all of us to dinner before she went back. I was happy she wasn't leaving just yet because I was going to miss her. It was nice being back home for the break. I never get tired of being around my mother.
"Can you do this for me?" Jayla asked holding a gold chain out to me. It wasn't anything too flashy. It was small, but nice.
I took the chain from the girl and motioned for her to turn around so I could help her put it on. Once it was clasped I patted the girl's back.
"You're good." I told the girl and she thanked me.
"Preciate it."
The chain went well with the black shirt the girl was wearing. She wore ripped blue jeans and some Royalty 4's.
"Have you seen my camo bomber jacket?" The girl asked searching through her closet.
"Check my closet." I told the girl and she narrowed her eyes at me.
"Why is it in your closet?"
"Because I borrowed it. Duh." I answered plainly.
"Don't get smart, lil nigga. You never asked to borrow it and I don't remember seeing you with it on."
Jayla grabbed the jacket and slipped it on. It brought her outfit together nicely and I gave her a thumbs up.
"I don't have to ask and damn daddy. Who you getting all nice for? If it's for me, I'm flattered, but I have a girlfriend."
Jayla rolled her eyes at my joke.
"I'm not getting nice for anyone. I'm literally just wearing a plain black shirt and jeans. This is a simple chain and an old ass jacket. The flyest thing on me is my shoes and I doubt I'm gonna pull a bitch because of some Jordan's."
Someone's defensive.
"Well, you make plain, simple, and old look mighty good." I told the girl and she sighed.
"Well, I'm not trying. I just didn't want to look like a bum since your mom is taking us out. Besides, why can't I look good just to look good? I don't have anyone to impress and even if I did, I wouldn't dress a certain way for them."
Again. Someone's defensive.
"Okay, Jay." I said letting the girl win because I wasn't about to argue about something so obvious. She was trying to look good for Niya.
"Why aren't you dressed yet?" The girl asked and I shrugged.
"We aren't leaving for another hour."
"No, you dumbass. We're leaving in like twenty minutes."
I furrowed my eyebrows at my friend.
"I thought we were going at 6?"
"It's 5:37, Daniella."
Jayla wore the straightest face ever and that only made me feel like an even bigger dumbass. I guess I got distracted and lost track of time.
"Oh. Well, I guess I better get ready." I laughed despite myself and started searching for something to throw on. I settled on a white shirt, ripped black jeans and my pair of checkered sk8 hi vans. I put on a jean jacket and left it at that. My hair was down it's natural curls and as always, I looked fine as fuck.
"You look really good for someone that just found an outfit and got dressed in less than five minutes." Jayla gave me a half ass compliment and I glared at her.
"Bitch, I look good period. Don't play me, witcho bald headed ass."
Jayla laughed at my verbal attack.
"Damn hoe. I didn't mean that in a bad way. It takes skill to be able to pull something like that off." The girl clarified. "And my hair is growing back, so you can call me bald headed all you want, but just wait until I grow my shit back out. You stay talking shit about my hair, but Nadia never complained about it. And your sister didn't either. So shit."
That little bitch.
"First of all, keep my wife out of this and don't talk about my sister like that either since you feel the need to toy with her emotions." I said making the girl screw her face up at me.
"How the hell have I been toying with her emotions? She hasn't even spoken to me since Christmas. If anything she's toying with my emotions."
Well, that went from playful to serious real quick.
"She hasn't spoken to you since Christmas?" I asked the girl and she let out a sad sigh.
"Nope. Not a single word. She barely even looks at me and there was a point in time when I couldn't get her weird ass to stop staring at me. I didn't even do anything to her."
Jayla sat down on her bed and pouted like a big kid. I thought it was cute, but I refrained from saying that because she'd probably get mad.
"Have you tried talking to her?"
Jayla nodded her head.
"I tried during the break and I even tried when we were helping her move in yesterday, but nothing worked. The most I got out of her was a smile and it was only because I tripped getting into the elevator on one of our trips upstairs."
I tried not to laugh at the mention of the girl tripping. I wish I would have seen it.
"I wish I could tell you why she was ignoring you, but my sister is a very complex individual."
My friend scoffed at my words.
"Tell me about it. She's so damn confusing. But it is what it is. I'm not about to stress over it. I'm so fucking sick of girls." The girl grumbled.
"Well, there are plenty of guys on this campus to choose from. I'm not personally a fan of dick, but I'm sure it's not too bad once you get used to it."
Jayla looked genuinely disgusted at my words.
"I would rather scoop my eyeballs out with my own fingers than to fuck or even kiss a guy. I'd bathe in acid before I ever did anything remotely sexual with a guy."
Even I wasn't that anti-hetero. Sheesh.
"I was only kidding." I held my hands up in surrender.
"I'm sorry. Men just disgust me. Well, thinking about them in a sexual way disgusts me." The girl said cringing.
"I feel ya." I chuckled. "You wanna head downstairs? My mom should be here soon."
I looked at my phone and saw that it was 5:55pm.
"Yeah."
Aniya and Nadia were already in the lobby when we got down there. Aniya spotted us first. She looked at me and then rolled her eyes when she saw Jayla. Despite that action, she let her gaze stay on my friend for a few seconds before looking down at her phone. I should ask her what's up. But later.
Nadia spotted us next and she smiled when she saw me. She looked good with her hair slicked up in a curly ponytail. She was dressed pretty simple in some skinny jeans with the knees ripped. She had a red and black flannel shirt tied around her waist and a white shirt that hugged her nicely. She was also wearing a black jacket, that I recognized as one of mine. It looked way better on her.
"Excuse me ma'am?" I said as I approached my girlfriend. "Could I borrow a kiss? I promise to give it back."
Nadia chuckled at my cheesiness.
"I can't believe your pick up lines haven't gotten any better." The girl shook her head.
"Says my girlfriend." I spoke sarcastically.
"Only because I felt sorry for you. I didn't want you to die alone. I did you a favor if you ask me."
I laughed at my girlfriend's words.
"Nah who ever made the shirt I'm wearing did me a favor. Do you know what it's made from?"
"Cotton? I don't know. What kind of random ass question is that?"
Nadia looked so confused.
"It's actually made from girlfriend material."
"I wanna break up."
I just laughed at the girl because she wanted to do anything, but that.
"Nah, you're stuck with me forever." I said pulling the girl into a hug that she tried to get out of.
"Nothing lasts forever." The girl spoke once she got out of the hug and I frowned.
"Well then be my nothing. Problem solved." I shrugged.
"Okay, I kinda like that one." Nadia spoke making me smirk.
"Mom's outside." Aniya said getting up from wear she was sitting and leaving the lobby.
"Baby, could you hold this for me until we get in the car?"
Nadia gave me a puzzled look before holding her hand out for the "thing" I needed her to hold.
I placed my hand in hers before lacing our fingers together.
"Thank you." I said kissing the girl's cheek and she just laughed while shaking her head at my lameness.
"I take it back. All of your lines suck."
-
Aniya sat in the front seat, leaving Nadia, Jayla, and me to sit in the back. She wasn't being her normal self and it kind of worried me. She wasn't even talking. She was just looking at her phone, but I could tell she wasn't actually doing anything on it.
Since she was already looking at her phone, I texted her asking her what was wrong with her.
She replied a simple 'Nothing', but I knew that wasn't the case. Niya was never quiet. I would know considering I spent most of the time begging her to shut the hell up.
I texted her again, but when she saw it this time, she didn't respond. It takes a bold motherfucker to leave you on read when they know you watched them get your text. I'm offended.
We went to Texas Roadhouse and I was happy because it was one of the first restaurants we tried when I got here. It was officially one of my favorites.
We were greeted and seated once we got in the restaurant since it wasn't that crowded.
We sat in a booth and I could see the annoyance in Aniya's face at the fact that she and Jayla were beside each other. Normally she'd be happy about this because it would be easier for her to perv on the grey eyed girl. Something had to be wrong with her.
Shortly after we were seated a young looking waitress came to our table. She looked about 22. She was a pretty girl with a chocolate skin tone and pretty brown eyes. Pretty brown eyes that landed and stayed on Jayla for a little bit too long. The homie definitely has the juice.
"Hi, my name is Willow and I'll be your server for tonight. Can I start you all off with some drinks?"
She smiled a lot as she talked and I'm guessing that was a part of her job. She had a really nice smile and it seemed to get brighter every time she made eye contact with Jayla. It was kinda funny because Jayla didn't seem to notice. I guess her mind was on someone else.
Once we'd all given our drink orders, Willow left to retrieve them.
"Do you know what you're getting?" Nadia asked me and I pointed to what I always got.
"I'm gonna get the grilled salmon with seasoned rice and broccoli for my sides. The rice is so good here." I informed the girl and she nodded.
"Okay, I'm gonna try that then."
"Copycat." I teased.
"Oh hush. This is the first time you've ever known what you wanted." The girl pointed out and my mom nodded her head in agreement.
"I usually have to choose for her." The woman added her unneeded two cents.
"That's only because I have trouble choosing between foods because I really like food." I defended myself.
"You two know what you want?" My mom turned to Jayla and Aniya and they both stayed silent.
"What's wrong with y'all now?" The woman asked looking fed up with the two.
"There isn't anything wrong with me. I just don't know what I want." Jayla shrugged and Aniya scoffed.
"You're damn right about that." My sister mumbled under her breath, but I'm sure everyone heard her.
"Watch your mouth." Our mother scolded the girl.
"What do you mean by that because last time I checked you're the only person changing up. One minute you can't keep your hands off of me and the next you won't even talk to me?"
My mom face palmed at Jayla's words and I tried not to laugh because she really hated it when we overshared around her. It's her fault for being so easy to talk to and around.
"You're making my mom uncomfortable." Aniya said focusing back on her menu.
"I can't read your fucking mind, Aniya. I can't know what I'm doing wrong if you won't even talk to me." Jayla spoke, obviously not caring that the rest of us could hear.
"Language." My mother butted in and Jayla apologized before just giving up on the whole conversation.
I felt kinda bad for Jayla because my poor friend was actually oblivious to my sister's feelings for her. I'd tell her, but she wouldn't believe me anyway. She'd just have to figure it out for herself.
Willow returned with all of our drinks and took all of our food orders. Aniya and Jayla ended up getting what my mother got which was grilled shrimp and seasoned rice with their choice of a side. Another waitress came by and sat two small baskets of butter and rolls on our table for us to eat while we waited. I immediately grabbed one because the rolls were really good and they came with cinnamon butter. I've never seen that done before other than at this restaurant.
While we waited for food, my mother and Nadia started a conversation while Jayla and Aniya stayed silent. I didn't have anyone to talk to so I just made a meal of the rolls the waitress brought. I don't pass up free food. Even if it is just bread.
I felt Nadia's leg brush up and against mine and I knew it was an accident because she kept talking to my mother.
The small contact gave me an idea and I smirked to myself as I let a hand disappear under the table. I placed and hand on Nadia's thigh and she didn't pay it any mind. It wasn't until I started to slowly rub the girl's thigh that she gave me some type of reaction. I looked over at the girl and she gave me a warning look, but I didn't let it stop me.
As Nadia continued to talk to my mother my hand continued to travel to wherever my heart desired. When my hand found it's way between the girl's legs she cleared her throat, but I ignored it.
Nadia was saved by Willow returning with our food. I didn't bother Nadia while we ate because I was too focused on the task at hand.
Once we finished eating, my mother paid the bill and Nadia, Jayla, Aniya, and I covered the tip.
As we were leaving the restaurant, the waitress stopped Jayla, telling her that she left something at the table.
I had a feeling Jayla hadn't left anything behind because she looked kinda confused at whatever the waitress gave her.
"What'd you leave?" I asked when the girl caught up to the rest of as.
"Her number apparently." The girl said showing me the paper that Willow wrote her number and name on.
Instead of being smug about the situation like she'd usually be. Jayla didn't seem to care very much. That was weird because that waitress was bad.
"Why do you look so bummed? She was pretty." I spoke so just Jayla could hear and she just shrugged.
"She's not my type."
Maybe I'm delusional, but I swear Jayla gave Aniya a longing look right after saying those words.
"Then what's your type?" I asked the girl and she just sighed.
"I don't want to talk about this."
I let Jayla walk ahead of me to the car because I didn't want to keep bothering her. She seemed really sad and she was hardly ever like this. Even when something was wrong she'd try to play it off. My poor, stupid, best friend.
"I call shotgun!" I yelled childishly.
"Man, no. Get your little ass in the back." Aniya spoke like she wasn't just an hour older than me.
"Aniya, I'm gonna start putting my hands on you if you keep that up. So now you get your little ass in the back since you can't watch that mouth." My mother jumped in and I stuck my tongue out at my sister because I won. She just ignored my childishness.
"I'm sorry, Ma, but she wasn't even worried about the front seat. I'm not sitting in the middle though." Aniya said as we approached the car.
"Well, I'm not either." Nadia said leaving Jayla to be stuck in the middle.
Haha. My plan worked.
Once we were settled in the car, I glanced back to see my accomplishment. Aniya was looking out the window and Jayla was looking at the girl with this confused and hurt look on her face.
And she says she doesn't like Niya that way.
"What the hell is up with you two?" My mom asked noticing the obvious tension between the two girls.
"Nothing. Nothing at all." Aniya said still looking out of the window.
"I honestly have no idea. We were just fine and then she started ignoring me." Jayla spoke to my mother.
"I'm not trying to be in your business, but you two are going to be seeing a lot of each other at and away from school, so I don't like this. Whatever it is, fix it." My mother told the girls and Jayla nodded, but Aniya sucked her teeth.
"There isn't anything to fix. It's not like we were friends or anything. We fucked once. She's no different than any other girl I one nighted."
The car got quiet at Aniya's words. Not even my mother knew what to say to that.
I knew Aniya didn't mean that, but the look on Jayla's face showed that she thought the other girl did.
"Aniya, stay in the car when we get back to the school," was the only thing my mother said as she made her way back to our campus.
-
When we got back to campus, Aniya stayed in the car like our mother told her to and the rest of us got out after saying goodbye to the woman.
"She didn't mean that." I tried speaking to Jayla as we walked into the school.
The girl shrugged her shoulders.
"I'm not about to stress over a bitch that gave me head."
Look's like they were both saying things they didn't mean tonight.
"I get that you're upset over what she said, but you're not helping the situation by stooping to her level."
Jayla narrowed her eyes at me.
"I can stoop as low as I want. I haven't done anything to piss her off, so if she's gonna be a bitch, I'm gonna be a bigger one. I'm so fucking done with these stupid ass females." Jayla walked off in another direction and Nadia stopped me from following her.
"Just let her go." The girl spoke with a hand on my arm. "Let her cool off."
"Where'd she go?" Niya asked catching up to us shortly after Jayla stormed off. I simply pointed in the direction that Jayla had gone.
"You should let her cool off first." Nadia spoke, but Aniya shook her head.
"Nah, I can't let her think I meant that. She just gets on my damn nerves being so blind. Do I have to put it on a fucking billboard sign for her to understand?"
Nadia furrowed her eyebrows, but I just shook my head, so she wouldn't ask Aniya what she meant by that.
"Well, you might want to go catch her before she gets too far away. It's not like you know your way around campus yet."
Aniya nodded at Nadia's words before running to catch up with Jayla.
"Let me guess. Aniya likes Jayla and Jayla's too stupid to notice?" Nadia said once Aniya got out of earshot.
"Yup." I said chuckling at how easily the girl caught on.
"This should be interesting. How long until they're together? I give it about a month because even if Aniya tells Jayla that she likes her, Jay's gonna deny feeling the same. Aniya shouldn't have said what she said in the car. That's messed up and knowing Jayla, she was probably already scared that Aniya felt like that anyway."
I pinched the bridge of my nose at the thought of the possible drama that would transpire between my best friend and sister. Well, my sisters because Jayla is family.
"They'll get through this. Aniya, though she may not seem like it, is a lot more level headed than Jayla. And besides, Jayla seems to have a soft spot for her." I said making Nadia laugh.
"Jayla had a soft spot for Mya too and look how that turned out."
"Yeah, but that was Mya's fault. And besides, Aniya is nothing like Mya."
I held the door open for Nadia as we walked into the lobby of our dorms.
"Thank you. I just hope Aniya can handle Jayla's temper. It's not a good idea to go after her when she's mad."
"I really hope they don't fight again because Jayla's stitches might have adsorbed, but Aniya's hand is still fucked up, so that's not really a fair fight." I spoke only half joking. They better not fight.
"You can't really call what happened between them a fight because I've seen the aftermath of Jayla's fights and Aniya's face looked a little too pretty for them to have fought. Either Jayla's getting soft, or she didn't actually want to hurt Aniya."
I went with Nadia to her room since Jayla was where ever she was.
"Where's Chastity?" I asked looking at the other girl's side of the room.
"She isn't back yet. She's coming tomorrow morning."
I kicked my shoes off and fell on to my girlfriend's bed. She kicked her shoe's off as well before climbing on top of me.
"Tell me something." The girl spoke and I raised my eyebrows.
"Hm?"
"Why the hell were you trying to violate me right in front of your mother?" The girl asked looking down at me and I started laughing.
"That was a part of your punishment. Remember?"
Nadia shook her head at me.
"Well, you failed miserably."
"I know I did and that's why that doesn't count as your punishment."
Nadia leaned down and buried her face into my neck.
I already knew what was coming, so I let my hands cup the girl's ass as she began to kiss my neck.
The girl's kisses went from my neck to my jaw line before she finally pressed her lips against mine. I was expecting things to heat up, but she broke the kiss.
"I'm gonna go take a shower." The girl said trying to get off of me, but I sat up and wrapped my arms around her waist.
"I didn't even get a chance to get you dirty." I pouted up at the girl.
"Trust me. You got me dirty at the restaurant."
I laughed at the girl's words.
"I only touched your thigh."
"So? you did it in a sexual way."
"So that's all it takes?" I asked arching an eyebrow.
Instead of answering me, Nadia successfully got off of me. She's no fun.
"Wanna shower together?"
Yeah that thing I said about Nadia being no fun. I take it back.
"Do I even need to answer that question?" I asked making the girl giggle.
"Come on, Horny Fuller."
I wasn't even offended by the nickname. It fit me perfectly.
Jayla
I needed to take a walk to clear my head. I was extremely confused because I thought Aniya liked me. Not like like, but I really thought we were friends.
I hate to admit it, but for her to say I was no different than any other girl she fucked kinda hurt. It shouldn't have because our relationship was supposed to be based solely on sex. I just can't help thinking there was a little more. Not anything romantic, but I liked being around her. I felt comfortable talking to her because she never judged me. I even cried in front of her and I hate letting people see me weak.
I talked to her about my mom. I need to stop opening up to people so easily. I didn't tell her much, but I wish she didn't know anything. This is the type of shit that happens when I let my guard down.
I guess this is why she fed me that shit about not wanting to be my fuck buddy. Being my fuck buddy would require her to have sex with me more than once and that's not how she operated. I'm so stupid.
I'm stupid for getting involved with her and I'm stupid for actually being hurt by her words. We didn't have anything special. This shouldn't even matter to me, but it does. It just seemed like she cared about me. She held me while I cried and told me I was pretty even though I looked in the mirror and saw anything but a pretty face. She did that stupid forehead kiss thing and she just looks at me in a way I've never been looked at before.
What am I even thinking right now? There was nothing special about anything she did. I was just another fuck for her and I need to take this L like a woman. There's no use in sulking about it like a little bitch.
I had stopped walking and sat down on a random bench. It was dark out and I took in how pretty this campus was at night. It felt like I was the only person on the entire campus because there wasn't a soul in sight.
Or so I thought.
"I'm so glad you sat down. It feels like I've been chasing you for hours. I'm not athletic like my sister."
Aniya stopped in front of me with her hands on her knees as she panted.
I wanted to laugh at her because she was extremely out of shape, but I wasn't in a laughing mood. Why was she even talking to me right now?
"Why were you even chasing me? Do you chase the other girls you one night?" I asked using the girl's words against her.
"I don't chase anyone." The girl spoke between breaths. "Only you, Grey Eyes."
Her usage of the nickname made an unwanted heat rise in my cheeks. She hasn't called me that in a while. Then again, she's barely spoken to me.
"I thought I wasn't any different from any other girl you one nighted." I said narrowing my eyes at the girl.
"I need to sit down." The girl said sitting beside me on the bench. "Why the hell is running so hard?"
"It isn't. You're just really out of shape." I said slipping up and laughing at the girl.
"It's crazy how Dani's the one with asthma, but she can run and it seems like she never gets tired. I, on the other hand, am dying from a jog down a side walk."
I just looked at the girl as she got her breathing back normal. I'm not even gonna lie, she looked kinda cute all discombobulated and whatnot. But I'd never tell her that.
"Okay." The girl said seeming more composed. "About what I said in the car. I didn't mean that. I was just being a dick for reasons I don't feel like explaining because I doubt you'd get it anyway. That's actually why I was upset. You don't get it. It's like you're fucking stupid or something."
"What kind of fucked up apology is this?" I asked cutting the girl off. "You can't apologize and insult in one breath. That's not how that works."
"I'm sorry. This shit is just so new to me." The girl said nervously scratching the back of her neck.
"You mean to tell me you've never apologized to someone before?"
I was really confused. How has she never apologized to someone before?
"No." The girl sighed while pinching the bridge of her nose. "I've never had feelings for someone before."
"Who do you have feelings for and why would that make you be an asshole to me?"
Aniya's mouth dropped open when I asked that and I just sat there waiting on her to answer my question.
"If I felt like waiting a few more weeks to kiss you again, I'd dead ass punch you in your face right now."
I just gave Aniya a confused look because I was still lost.
"Oh my God, Grey Eyes! How do you not get it by now?!" The girl yelled at me and it caught me off guard.
"Get what?!" I yelled back.
The fuck is she yelling at me for?
"I FUCKING LIKE YOU, DUMBASS!"
Aniya's words echoed through the campus and I still wasn't sure that I'd heard her correctly.
"You what?" I asked in a normal voice because I felt like someone would call campus police if we kept yelling at each other .
"I like you." The girl spoke in a more gentle voice. "I have feelings for you or whatever the hell people say when they confess this shit."
Aniya was really bad at this and I needed time to process it. She likes me? She was serious that day in the car when she said I kissed her because I "liked her back"? She's had feelings for me this entire time?
She was never joking when she said she wanted me.
"I know you don't feel the same way and I'm not asking for anything. This is just the reason why I couldn't be your fuck buddy. You're not the type of girl I could have as a fuck buddy. You're worth a lot more than casual sex. You're worth more than something meaningless and temporary. I actually care about you."
I was completely lost for words. Aniya was telling me the total opposite of what I thought of myself. She saw a worth that I had trouble seeing in myself. She really did care about me and I got a warm fuzzy feeling in my stomach at the thought of those facts.
"Could you at least reject me verbally? Your silence is killing me." The girl said laughing nervously.
She didn't ask me anything, so I couldn't really reject her. I'm guessing she wants to know if I feel the same. I don't even know if I feel the same! I didn't think I did, but I can't deny that she makes me feel...something. But what?
I couldn't come up with the right words to say, so I just did the next best thing.
I didn't realize how much relief I would feel once I got to kiss Aniya again. It felt like it had been years and I was definitely suffering without the feeling of her soft lips against mine. I'd missed this.
I felt one of the girl's hands settling on my cheek as she deepened the kiss. I guess she missed it too. The funny thing is, it only happened once.
"Does this mean you like me back, or did you just not know what to say?" The girl asked once we broke the kiss.
I didn't know if I liked Aniya. I didn't think it would ever come to this. She didn't seem like the feelings type, but of course I was wrong in that assumption. I should have known not to think that considering I hated it when people assumed that about me.
"I like being around you." I attempted to explain feelings I didn't really understand at the moment. "I like talking to you. I obviously like kissing you and doing...other things with you. I hate not doing any of those things, but I don't know what that means. I don't know if that means that I like you."
"You don't have to know right now. Like I said, I'm not asking for anything. I just wanted you to know how I felt because that's what's been causing issues between us. My feelings and your obliviousness to them."
"Well you could have just told me how you felt." I said rolling my eyes.
"I did tell you. You just suck at picking up on things. But don't worry, you being dumb doesn't change how I feel about you."
Aniya smiled at me like she hadn't just insulted me.
"You have to stop calling me names."
"Stop giving me reasons to."
I just glared at the girl since I didn't have a come back to that.
"So what now? You gonna ignore me until I can sort out my feelings for you?"
Aniya looked over at me with a guilty look on her face.
"I've never had a female friend before. Usually I have sex with girls and that's that. Besides, it's hard being around you and not being able to have you the way I want you."
"You can have me though. That was one of the perks of the whole fuck buddy thing." I said chuckling.
Aniya sighed dramatically.
"That's not the way I want you. You still don't get it. This isn't about sex. I want you. Not just the naked you, but...you. All of you. I'm no expert on this by any means. I just know my feelings for you are deeper than the physical things."
"But we barely know each other." I said for lack of a better response to the girl's confession.
"I know that you hide behind your haircut and clothes because of something that happened to you in your past. I know that being called pretty makes you uncomfortable, but not when I say it. I know you sometimes want to punish yourself when you feel yourself enjoying life a little too much because you blame yourself for your mother's death."
She just kept going.
"I know that you hate crying because it makes you feel weak. I know that you have trouble seeing your worth because someone in your life has made you feel worthless. I know that you don't want to be hurt again. You won't admit it, but Mya choosing her ex over you hurt you because it gave you that same feeling of worthlessness you've been trying to recover from."
It was like she saw right through me.
"You haven't told me much about you, but I know more about you than you think. I know enough to know that I like you. And I know enough to know that even though you haven't realized it yet, you like me too."
Once again, I was lost for words. I didn't even know Aniya paid that much attention to me.
"And I also know that you didn't think I paid that much attention to you, but I've been paying attention to you since the first day I saw you. No creepy shit. You just caught my attention. I saw a sadness in your eyes that I was far too familiar with. That emptiness. The feeling of being alone. I knew it all too well. I should have approached you differently, but like I've said, I'm new to this."
Hearing all of this makes me wish Aniya would have been the person I opened up to. She should have been the one that caught my attention during a thanksgiving break. I should have been working towards a relationship with her.
I didn't even have to tell her anything, yet here she is telling me about myself. She doesn't know everything about me, but I know I could tell her everything and nothing would change. She'd still like me and she wouldn't choose anyone else over me. That's what I need. Someone that's all for me.
"Can we get to know each other more? I know you don't want to be around me, but we're not gonna get anywhere if we don't get to know each other better. If I don't spend any time with you, I'm never going to know what I feel."
"I disagree with that."
Aniya was smirking at me, so I figured she was joking. I rolled my eyes.
"And why is that?"
"Because distance makes the heart grow fonder. You can't stand it when I ignore you. It's torture. Isn't it?"
She's was right. I couldn't stand it. But what was the alternative? Hopping into premature relationship with her? That was asking for trouble.
"You know, the talking stage exists for a reason. Relationships aren't automatic." I tried to explain, but Aniya didn't seem to care.
"I don't like the whole idea of the "talking stage". I already told you I can't just give a little bit. What's the point anyway? I already know I like you. So we're gonna just "talk", but be exclusive, but without a title? I think that's stupid."
She really didn't understand how any of this worked and it was kinda cute, but it irritated me at the same time.
"What happened to you not asking me for anything? It's not fair if you go back to ignoring me just because I'm not sure what I want yet. These things take time."
"I never said I wouldn't give you time. I'm just saying that I think the talking stage is stupid. I guess it's because I'm used to doing things fast. Girls will know me for an hour and then boom, we're having sex, but God forbid I want something serious. This just doesn't make sense to me. Then again, I guess your heart is a lot more fragile than your body."
Aniya looked to be really struggling with understanding why people shouldn't just hop into relationships. She did have a point though. Why was it so easy for some people (including myself) to give their body, but not their heart? Shouldn't both be cherished?
"I don't want you to ignore me while I figure this out. I want to spend more time with you and I want to know more about you. I'll tell you more about myself as well. Just please don't go back to giving me the cold shoulder." I begged.
"So, you're not gonna find a new fuck buddy?" The girl asked and I frowned.
"No. Why do you keep saying that anyway?" I asked remembering the day the girl told me she didn't want to be my fuck buddy anymore.
"Well, I over heard you telling Dani that if I liked you, you'd have to find a new fuck buddy. That's mainly why I started ignoring you. I guess I was kinda salty. I don't want anyone else touching you."
I had no idea that Aniya over heard my conversation with Dani. It all made sense now. She didn't start ignoring me until after that. I should have noticed something was off that morning though. She basically told me that she didn't want to be my fuck buddy before things started going downhill. I really am oblivious.
"Possessive much?" I teased.
"Hell yeah. Have you looked in the mirror lately? I know bitches are gonna be lined up to take you away from me, but just know, I'll beat a bitch's ass over you. Real shit."
I burst out laughing at how serious the girl looked.
"Damn, you're claiming me already?"
Aniya screwed her face up.
"I been claiming you for weeks now. I'm just waiting for you to start claiming me too. Then we can get somewhere."
I just laughed at the girl because I knew her crazy ass was serious. I'm not even bothered though. I want someone to want me enough to fuck a bitch up over me. We can fuck bitches up together because I know girls are gonna be coming after her too. Probably dudes too since she's actually feminine.
"All I'm asking for is time." I said making the girl pout.
"Fine, but just know that the next person I have sex with will be my girlfriend. I don't want to hop right back into what we were doing."
"If you've liked me this entire time, why'd you do what you did to me that day in the kitchen? If sex wasn't what you wanted, why you do it?"
I wasn't asking that question in an accusatory way. I was just curious.
"I couldn't help myself. The physical is included in all of you after all."
I wasn't sure if I liked Aniya, but I sure as hell wanted to. I just wanted to be sure before we started anything. Because I wouldn't be able to handle messing things up with her. I can barely deal with her being mad at me now.
"Okay, so no sex. Can I still kiss you though?" I asked feeling myself blush right after.
"We have to make up for lost time, so yes. Kissing is allowed. It's encouraged actually."
Thank God.
"Okay good. Any other rules?" I asked and Aniya nodded her head.
"No other bitches. I'm not trying to kill anyone, but I will if I have to and I am too damn fine for prison."
I laughed at that last part because that's the same thing Ms. Fuller says.
"Okay. Anything else?"
"Don't go kissing another girl while we're in this stage. I know how you get down."
I could tell Aniya wanted to laugh at her little jab.
"Fuck you." I said pushing the girl. "You're the one that kissed me."
Aniya just laughed at the weak push I gave her.
"I'm just messing with you. I know you just couldn't resist me. I would have kissed me too." The girl spoke cockily.
"You are so full of yourself." I rolled my eyes.
"I'm not actually. It's just a facade."
I couldn't tell whether or not Aniya was serious, but I decided not to ask.
"Can we go back to the dorms now?" I asked and Aniya groaned.
"Do we have to? It's really pretty out here and I'm trying to spend as much time out of my room as possible."
"Why?" I asked the girl.
"Because Mya's my roommate. That's why. Shit is mad awkward man."
I chuckled at the frown on the girl's face.
"Why is it awkward? She screwed me over, not you. Besides, she's a cool person. I don't see why you two wouldn't be able to get along."
It didn't make sense for things to be weird between Aniya and Mya. If it wasn't weird before, it shouldn't be weird now.
"I don't have an issue with her. I have an issue with her and her girl acting like I'm not in the room. There's only a wall separating us, you mean to tell me they can't wait until they're alone to fuck? I've only spent one night in the same room as her and I already want a new roommate."
I burst out laughing at how angry Aniya seemed.
"Man, it's not funny." The girl mean mugged me. "What makes it worse is the fact that they actually thought they were being quiet. I almost made myself go deaf trying to use music to drown them out. Then again, deafness would have been the better alternative."
"Just come to my room." I told the girl.
Aniya seem to be thinking it over.
"I can't." The girl refused and I frowned.
"Why not?"
"I'm gonna wanna do things to you if I'm alone with you for too long. Especially in your bedroom." The girl admitted.
I ignored the feeling I got at the thought of Aniya not being able to resist me.
"You mean to tell me you can't control yourself?"
"The only reason I'm on best behavior right now is because we're outside. Keeping my hands off of you is extremely hard."
I felt the girl's hand creeping up my thigh as she spoke. If I didn't know any better, I would have thought someone was running a hot iron up my leg.
The girl's hand crept farther up before slipping it under my shirt and letting it settle on my waist.
Her body had shifted closer to mine, allowing me to feel her breath on my neck.
What happened to being on her best behavior?
"We're outside. Remember?" I spoke in a whisper. Why the hell was I whispering?
"Mmhm." The girl mumbled against my neck.
The sound of footsteps caused me to push the girl away."
There was a girl heading our way as she walked up the side walk.
Aniya's hand went back to my thigh as we sat, waiting for the girl to pass.
I was expecting the girl to simply pass us, but she stopped when she saw me. Ugh. I don't even know this girl.
"Hey Jay." The girl spoke in a flirtatious manner.
She's so disrespectful. Aniya could have very well been my girl. I mean, she had her hand on my thigh.
"What's up?"
I didn't recognize the girl, so I wasn't sure how she knew my name and I damn sure didn't know hers.
"I don't know. You tell me. I've been waiting for you to hit me up." The girl spoke putting a hand on her hip.
"Don't hold your breath, baby girl."
I tried not to laugh at Aniya cutting into the conversation. Possessive ass. I didn't mine though.
"Don't you have a girlfriend?" The girl asked screwing her face up at Aniya.
She must have thought it was Dani. No wonder she came at me so shamelessly.
"Yeah. You've been waiting for her to hit you up." Aniya answered the girl's question.
"Y'all are foul as fuck."
After telling us that, the girl walked off. I immediately started laughing when she got a good distance away.
"Why are we foul? That bitch doesn't even know me." Aniya asked laughing too.
"She thought you were Dani." I informed the girl and she laughed harder.
"So, you plan on telling every girl that comes at me that I'm your girlfriend?"
Aniya's laughter stopped and for the first time ever, unless I'm forgetting a time, the girl blushed.
"You looked uncomfortable. I was just trying to help you out." The girl recovered quickly.
"Sure you weren't just being possessive?"
Instead of answering my question, Aniya stood up and held the hand that wasn't in a cast out for me.
"Um, let's head back to the dorms."
I allowed the girl to pull me up from the bench. Aniya laced her fingers with mine as we started walking. The little action gave me all types of butterflies. I haven't held hands with someone in so long. I felt sort of childish for being so giddy about it.
I played it cool externally, but internally I was freaking out. In a good way of course.
"Your palm's getting all sweaty." The girl chuckled causing my cheeks to heat up with embarrassment.
"I'm sorry." I apologized awkwardly while trying to pull my hand away from the girl's.
Aniya tightened the grip she had on my hand, so I couldn't pull it away.
"I don't mind." The girl reassured me. "I think it's cute that I make you so nervous."
"You don't make me nervous." I lied. "I have a medical condition."
"Hyperhidrosis?" The girl asked and I rolled my eyes. Of course she'd know what it's called.
"Maybe." I mumbled.
"Don't lie to me, Grey Eyes." The girl scoffed. "If it makes you feel any better, you make me nervous too. I'm just better at hiding it than you are."
We walked the rest of the way in silence. It was nice just being in the girl's presence. We didn't have to say anything. I just liked being near her.
Aniya only let my hand go to hold the door open for me. It was a little weird even though it was a normal gesture that anyone with decent manners was capable of. I was used to doing the door opening. At least that's what I'd always do for Nadia. Even though she always complained about it, I never let her open her own door. Whether it was a building or a car.
"Thanks." I said walking through the door.
"Of course."
We walked over to the welcome desk to sign in for the night before getting on to the elevator.
"So are you gonna come to my room?" I asked the girl, but she shook her head while pressing the button for the second floor.
"Nah, but I want to walk you to your door."
"You're such a gentlewoman." I said bumping the girl's shoulder with mine.
"Not really, but I'm getting used to doing shit I don't usually do for and because of you."
When the elevator doors opened, Aniya laced our fingers back together and we walked to my room. It was just at the end of the hall, but I still appreciated her walking me there. It elongated the time I got to spend with her and that was a plus.
I was a little disappointed when we reached my door because I knew this meant I had to say goodbye. She was just going to be on the floor above mine, but she wasn't going to be with me.
I stopped in front of my door and turned around so I was face to face with the girl.
"Stop looking like that." The girl frowned at me and furrowed my eyebrows.
"Looking like what?"
"All sad and shit. I'm literally gonna be an elevator ride away." The girl chuckled. "I had a feeling you were the clingy type."
I screwed my face up at that.
"I am not clingy." I spoke defensively.
"I'm not complaining." The girl smiled. "I want you to be."
Aniya leaned in to kiss me and I met her half way. I could feel my heart palpitating in my chest the instant our lips touched. I wrapped my arms around the girl's neck as she deepened the kiss. She took control of the kiss and I allowed it without a fight.
I don't know why I automatically took the more submissive role when it came to this girl. I liked the thought of being dominated by her. I usually hated being dominated because I hated not being in control, but I felt safe with her. It didn't freak me out to let her take control.
Aniya's tongue invaded my mouth and I pressed my body against the girl's, needing that extra contact.
"We better stop before I take you down in this hallway." The girl spoke breaking the kiss and taking a step back.
The huskiness in Aniya's voice sent shivers down my spine. The look in her eyes made me both nervous and excited.
"O-okay." I stuttered like a dork.
"I'll call you in about an hour." The girl chuckled at my obvious nervousness.
"Okay."
"Goodnight, Grey Eyes."
Aniya placed a kiss on my cheek before giving me one last look and then leaving me standing in the hallway looking a fool.
When I finally composed myself, I used my key card to open my door before walking into my room. Dani was sitting on her bed with a book in her hands. Only, the book was upside down.
"Were you watching us through the peep hole, Daniella?" I asked the girl and her cheeks and ears got red like they usually did when she was nervous or embarrassed.
"I heard noises. I was just making sure no one was trying to rob us."
"Who the hell is going to rob us in our dorms?" I laughed at the girl's ridiculous excuse.
"Okay, I was peeping. So what? I thought you didn't like Niya." The girl said trying to turn everything on me.
"You're a creep." I said refusing to address the girl's statement.
I wasn't going to deny liking Aniya anymore, but I couldn't say I did at the moment. I really wasn't sure. I just know that I like everything about her.
*********
This chapter was ass. 😂 I'm struggling with bringing this to a close, but I'm gonna get her done. I hope you enjoyed the chapter anyway. 😊
Thanks for reading!
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