[Y/N]
———
I can't do this anymore.
"[Y/N]! Where are you? You said we'd watch a movie together. Hey wait! Do you know if we have any more popcorn left? Did you eat the rest of it? [Y/N]?"
It had been three weeks. He did not tell me that we were going to be sleeping in the same bed together. Nor was I prepared to spend all my free time and weekends with him.
I seriously shouldn't have said all that 'I love you' stuff to him because this is what happens.
"[Y/N]?! Why are you ignoring me? We have a movie to watch! Don't tell me you already fell asleep- and without me?!"
This is what happens when me and Dazai live with each other.
I swear on my life I've never met such a possessive and clingy person- not to mention brother- in my life. I did love him, and I honestly didn't mind, I was pretty tolerant about it back then mainly because I was alone. I had no one but Dazai, and since he was my brother, that made the feeling of me always wanting to be around him 24/7 pretty strong.
I'm not gonna lie, after I was reunited with him, I did love spending all my time with him. He was my only family.
Though I don't want to admit it- ever since I've been with Chuuya, I've obviously been wanting to spend time with him. It used to be pretty easy, after Dazai found out, and there was usually no problem.
But since I live with Dazai, it's become harder. Like I've mentioned, Dazai and I have been spending literally all of our time together outside of work. It was good, but I wanted to see Chuuya.
I was only able to see Chuuya during work and it was sad honestly.
Chuuya was sort of getting frustrated with me and we sort of got into an argument. Our first argument.
*flashback*
"[Y/N], We haven't seen each other properly for a long time. What's going on?" Chuuya sighed.
He looked hurt and crossed his arms. He leaned against his desk.
"I'm really trying my best to leave the house but no matter what I do, Dazai will pester me until I give in and stay with him." I sighed, rubbing my eyes.
Chuuya pursed his lips and shook his head.
"Stop giving into your brother. I know how easy it is to get you to give in. I mean, I was able to do it myself a few times..." He mumbled, "but still. You should be able to say no and push him away. I want to see you." He admitted, getting irritated. "You seem to care way more about him than us. You've also not been answering my messages or calls. Did you forget about me?" Chuuya huffed.
Chuuya moved around his desk and sat down on his chair. He sat down and began typing away on his computer.
"I'm really sorry- but he always wants me to be only focused on him and it gets even more difficult if I leave his sight for more than a second. It's - it's just been that way ever since we were little." I sighed.
Chuuya's cheeks began growing red as his typing became more aggressive.
"Are you kidding? Is it really hard to respond to your boyfriend's texts or calls?" He rolled his eyes and shook his head. "You guys aren't little kids anymore, [Y/N]. Grow up."
I sighed and rubbed the back of my neck. I looked at him. His wonderful blue eyes were filled with anger. Something that I wasn't used to.
"Chuuya please.. I promise I'll try to spend time with you this weekend." I mumbled.
Chuuya stopped typing and looked me in the eyes for a second before smiling. (Not in a good way)
"Pfft! Sure! Just like you promised the last four times." He said sarcastically.
I frowned and felt ashamed. I couldn't do anything but apologize to him. I felt my cheeks begin to burn from embarrassment. I let out a small sigh and turned around and began walking out his office.
"You're just like your brother. Unreliable and ignorant." He mumbled quietly as I opened his door.
I stopped for a few moments and gripped door handle. My heart fell as the words left his mouth. I became hurt. Tears started forming as I shoved one of my hands in my pocket and turned around.
"Alright..." I nodded and sighed, looking at him briefly before closing the door behind me.
I stood in front of his door as tears started falling down my face.
That hurt a lot.
I left his office and went to Dazai's to go home.
*end of flashback*
I sighed as the feeling of sadness became stronger. It had been a few days after that. I hadn't seen or heard from Chuuya since then. Every time I tried to get close to him or speak, he'd ignore me or say something under his breath and leave. I also turned off my phone and went on a lot more outside missions too. I didn't really want to see Chuuya for awhile. I felt horrible for hurting him. It was all my fault.
"[Y/N]?"
Dazai came running into our room and opened the door. I turned my head to face him.
"Hm?"
"Do you want to go to sleep instead of watching the movie? It's only 6." Dazai asked.
"I just want to take a nap." I yawned.
"Hm.. Okay. I'll be back to take a nap too." Dazai said, before leaving the room.
I closed my eyes and sighed.
I'm sorry, Chuuya.
-
I woke up, feeling groggy. Surprisingly, Dazai wasn't next to me, passed out with his foot in my face. I slowly got up and used the bathroom.
After that, I went into the kitchen. I looked for something to eat as my stomach started growling like crazy. I began chopping up some apples.
"[Y/N]! Could you chop me up some apples? Oh hey do you want some too?"
We have company over?
Not being in the mood to introduce myself or see who it was, I continued to chop more apples with out bothering to look up.
Once I finished, I had two bowls. I walked over to Dazai and handed him the bowl as soon as I did, I saw Chuuya sitting across the couch from him. My eyes widened as I looked at him. I immediately felt hurt again. He looked back at me.
Before anything could escalate, I quickly looked away and began walking back to mine and Dazai's room.
"[Y/N]? Where are you going? Come back and watch a movie with me!" Dazai called.
I ignored him and kept going to our room.
Why is he here? Of all places?
I sent Dazai a text.
To bro:
Why is he here?
From bro:
We first were talking about work stuff then we started watching a movie. Come sit with us!
To bro:
No. I don't feel like interacting with.. others..
From bro:
Please?! Chuuya is here. Don't you want to see him?
To bro:
Make him leave please. We're not on good terms.
Dazai stopped responding after that. It was silent for a few moments before bickering occurred. It was slightly muffled so I couldn't really understand anything. I was sort of hesitant to try and listen.
Eventually, I convinced myself to turn invisible and go out and watch what was happening. I stood next to the TV, keeping my arms crossed.
"[Y/N] doesn't want you here that's why! What did you do to her?!" Dazai snapped.
"She hasn't responded to any of my messages or has bothered to contact me at all. Now she's trying to avoid the problem by ignoring me even more. Where is she? I want to speak with her." He said angrily.
"You aren't-"
I cut Dazai off by making myself visible.
"Dazai, could you please leave us alone?" I said.
They both turned to face me.
"[Y/N] but-"
"Don't." I snapped. "Just leave us alone. I don't want to hear it."
"I can't-"
"Dazai." I said, slightly raising my voice.
Dazai looked at me sadly before leaving to the other room.
"[Y/N]. Where's your phone?" Chuuya asked, walking up to me.
"I don't know. I put it away somewhere." I sighed, not bothering to meet his gaze.
"What?! And you didn't even bother to at least check it?" He asked, infuriated. "Why haven't you bothered to talk to me?"
"It's hard Chuuya. Every time I tried you ignored me. So why bother wasting the energy I don't have." I retorted. I looked at him in the eyes, tiredly, "I'm sorry I've been so ignorant and unreliable. I've already explained to you many times my reasons." I sighed.
"If you feel like this," I moved my hand between us, signaling us, "is a waste of time for you, I can understand. You can leave. You have every right to be mad, Chuuya. I hope you can forgive me." I said, before moving away.
Chuuya put his hand on the wall, next to my head to prevent me from leaving. I looked at him with guilt. He looked at me, hurt by my words.
"[Y/N] I didn't mean that. I was just angry and wasn't thinking. I'm sorry. I just want to spend time with you. I miss you." Chuuya admitted in a quiet voice. "It's not fair you give him all of your attention."
I felt my eyes tear up as I looked away from him. I stood still and stayed quiet for a few moments.
"I know I don't have the right but- That really hurt, Chuuya. Especially coming from you." I mumbled.
Chuuya kept his gaze on me for a few moments before pulling me into a hug.
"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, please don't cry."
I did the complete opposite as a few tears escaped. I slowly hugged him back. We stayed like this for a few moments in silence.
"I love you." Chuuya said quietly.
I felt my heart flutter. I felt shy and embarrassed as I pressed my face against his neck.
"I love you too." I said quietly.
"Will you please come spend sometime with me? Come spend a few nights at my house. Please." Chuuya asked.
"Okay. Let me get a few things then." I agreed.
Chuuya pulled away and looked at me happily.
"Really?! Right now?"
I nodded and smiled.
I pulled away from him and went back to my room. Dazai laid in the bed.
"Dazai I'm going to spend a few days with Chuuya." I said as I began putting clothes into a bag.
"What? No. Stay here with me. We have so much fun together every day! Chuuya won't be as fun and entertaining as me!" Dazai whined.
I sighed and continued packing my bags as Dazai continuously whined.
After I finished getting my stuff together, I walked out of the room, Dazai clinging on to my arm.
"Please let go of me." I sighed as we walking out into the living room.
Chuuya looked at Dazai in irritation.
"Dazai, I'm going to give you ten seconds to let go. You've had enough time with her, now it's my turn."
Dazai squeezed my arm and shook his head.
"If she goes, I go." He said boldly.
Chuuya furrowed his eyebrows angrily. Before he could attack Dazai, I pushed Dazai off of me and moved away from him.
"I'll be back soon!" I waved, quickly grabbing Chuuya's hand and walking out the door.
"Wait no-"
And with that I slammed the door shut and we left.
"I love him so much."
I sighed as I saw Dazai peek through the windows, giving me a sad look. Chuuya turned on his car as we got in and stared at me in annoyance.
"But he's just.. so.. clingy." I mumbled. "Sort of like you."
"What?!" Chuuya asked in shock.
"Well, you probably don't notice- and it's not even as bad as how Dazai is but you're... uh.. never mind let's go." I sighed.
"No." Chuuya took his hands off the wheel and crossed his arm, turning to face me. "Tell me."
Here we go
"Love please, I'll tell you when we get to your place." I said.
"Nope. Tell me. What were you going to say about me?" He huffed.
Chuuya was always so damn stubborn. He absolutely hates it when I say 'nevermind' and will do anything to force me to tell him what it was that I was going to say. Even if it's over something small. He always tried to do the same thing back to me, but it usually never worked because I'd just brush it off tell him, 'okay' right after he says 'nevermind' - which also pissed him off even more.
I sighed and gave him a small smile.
"That you're a loving and very compassionate partner who is smart and always knows how to make me feel better." I smiled.
Chuuya kept his angry face, but a blush spread across his face. He stared at me for a few moments before letting out a sigh.
"I'll let it slide... for now." He mumbled as he began driving away."
-
why'd this take me so long to write jesus.
I'm so tired