"It's enough" I threw my phone away. "It's been two weeks and I don't know what's wrong with this crazy women, why is she ignoring me? Why is she doing over night duty? Seldom I have seen her in house or I must say I have literally never witnessed her presence in our house, she comes home late, goes early! I am....it's enough, it's more than enough. Can not she see her ignorance kills me? Her replies are becoming short, either she says Yes or doesn't replies at all. This is seriously getting me mad, this is not how it is done"
I quickly took my car keys, drove to her hospital. I have had enough with her ignorance. How'll will you feel when someone you love ignores you for no reason, stops talking to you, how will you feel? That's literally how I am feeling. This situation is like "Now" or "Never". Today she has to answer all my questions.
I stepped inside the hospital and went to reception, the girl over there was drooling over me. I swear I want to punch her face, Shameless Girls.
"Dr Zara Haider" I annoyingly asked the receptionist, she smiled and checked something at her computer.
"Umm sorry sir, but Dr Zara has taken leave, it's been one week that she has taken leave." I was taken back with this statement, I nodded and left hospital.
"leave? But she... If she isn't here, where does she goes?" I was annoyed this time because of her lies, she has been lying all this time. I can stand anything but lies? What made her lie to me?
As soon as my cell phone rung, I attended it without checking the caller id. I was already pissed off, moreover august's summer made it worse for me.
"Hello" I spoke, trying to calm down my nerves.
"Shuja bro!!" So it was Maha, she spoke with elation. "Actually can you please go to this xyz park?" She asked, ughhh "I am already annoyed now park?
"Why?" I spoke calmly.
"Actually Zara asked me to meet her there but I have got an important work and she isn't attending the call, her cell is switched off so if I didn't go, she'll wait till night, she is crazy. So please can you go and pick her up. Tell her..I..." I quickly cutt off Maha.
"Okay fine thanks" I said in one breathe and ended call.
"Zara, now it's time to finally have a face off" I drove towards the park directed by Maha, it wasn't far away from hospital, I reached there in less than 10 minutes. I quickly parked my car, and entered the park. I rolled my eyes, zara was no where to be found. I thought to ask maha again but before I could take out my phone, someone bumped into me, losing her balance she was about to fall when I held her from waist.
I realised, she was.... "Zara" .....
..........................................................
We reached home by now, zara was about to go into room when I pulled her towards me. She gazed at me with sorrowful eyes, I have no idea why she gave that melancholic look.
"This is it zara, just stop it" , She looked at me with some shock, but covered it.
"Wh..What" She tried to take her hand away from my grip, I tightened it more.
"Let's be straightforward zara, I am fed up of your ignorance, your absence, this is seriously enough. I thought you are busy but no , Miss Zara has taken leave from hospital a week ago. Just tell me What's wrong?" I tightened my grip, she averted her eyes, Shaitan was getting over me but this time I decided to solve the matter without shaitan's influence.
"Noth..nothing's wrong" She stammered, she wasn't able to meet my eyes.
"Nothing's wrong? Nothing???" I almost shouted to which she closed her eyes, taking deep breathe I continued "Just tell me why are you ignoring me, ignoring us, why are you always running away from me?"
She stood silent, with her head averted, this rose anger in me. There is limit of patience but she has crossed it now. Astagfirullah.
"Just answer me damn it" I screeched
"Because I don't want to be with you, I hate your presnce , did you get that? I want freedom from this relation. This relation is like a cage to me, I just hate being around you" She shouted, with tears in her eyes, I was taken back at her sudden flow of emotions. "She thinks..this relation to be a cage?"
"But..But where did I go wrong" I cupped her face and asked in pure calm voice. The fear of losing her started to erupt inside me. "I can't lose her..no"
"No where! But I..." She gazed at me and stopped talking, our eyes were telling a whole different story.
"You What?" I rubbed my thumb on her cheek to which she closed her eyes.
"I don't want to be with you" I was startled
"But why??" I clenched my teeth
"I hate you" This statement broke my heart into million pieces, she is lying.
"And I want to end this relation, I hate it when you touch me like this" She pushed me away "I hate it when you are around me, this relation suffocates me, I can't stand it anymore". I went near her, she started breathing uneven, I put my both hands at her waist, and pulled her towards me such that our cheeks were touching.
"You hate it when I touch you like this" I started to touch her neck with my hand, and tightened grip by her waist, we were in intense position by now. "Tell me" I started rubbing my cheek with hers. "My touch affects you right". I had my eyes closed.
"N..No...it...it doe...doesn't" She stammered. I confronted her, such that our nose were touching, our eyes met. She pushed me away with force.
"I don't want...." Before she could complete, the anger rose in me and I cut her off
"I love you damn it" She looked startled "I love you, why don't you get it" I shouted.
"You..You what?" She asked me in calm voice, I went near her and again held her by waist.
"I love you" The tears started to brim in her eyes. I couldn't take it anymore so I crushed her lips with mine, to which she responded. Her hands travelled back to my hairs, my hands to her waist. The kiss was intense and I was losing myself in it when suddenly she pushed herself away. I felt worthless.
"You don't love me" She shouted, I was still in shock with her action.
"This is not called love, the feeling you have for me is not love but LUST" She screeched, I felt as if my chest was burning. She compared my love with that lust!!!! I was about to say something but she cut me off
"you just want me to fullfill your desires, that you have as a husband! you can never love me! Moreover I can never love you, NEVER!" I was broken now, I was angry, I was frustrated, I was anguished for what she thought of me.
"Why can you never love me?" I shot a death glare, holding her wrist firmly.
"Because I love someone else" , The situation should have made me believe this typical lie but heart made me laugh at it.
"You" I pointed her "Love someone?" She was confused "Oh please! Mrs Shuja Asif, I know you more than you know yourself"
"I don't owe you any explaination, let me go" She said it in frustration which increased my anger.
"I am your husband, for Allah's sake! Stop behaving like this" I shoutef.
"But I don't accept you as my husband" She tried to go away but my grip was way more firm.
"What do you want?" I have had enough with her now.
"Freedom from this relation. I want DIVORCE" This ultimately broke me.
"But I love you" I said with numb voice.
"It's lust, you lust for me, you just want to spend a night with me that's it, you don't love me, you just want to use me for your desires, you lu...." I couldn't take it anymore so I raised my hand, to which she looked at me with shock. I got my senses so I took my hand back, I didn't hurt her.
"If you think of me like this, and you think that all I love is your damnnn Body then I feel bad for myself, I shouldn't have loved a girl like you" Tears welled up in my eyes but my hurt supressed it "If you want this, then fine I WILL DIVORCE YOU" I was hurt, hurt that she doesn't loves me, hurt that she compared purity of my love to that impurity of lust. Before I had a break down. I went from there, I left home.
"I hate you Miss Zara Haider, I hate you"
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Thank you for votes and comments.
Now what? Oh No, they both just did that? Broke their relation 😲😲. This is not done. Now who needs to apologize whom?? should zara apologize shuja or should shuja apologize zara?? I guess this time Zara isn't fair, comparing love to lust is something absurd. 😞 Shuja is hurt, he needs healing, who'll help him?
Anyways #20 in Spiritual. How Cool! Thank you 😘😘😘😘
Asslam O Alaikum