"You promise you'll go home and sleep?" Connor said as he unbuckled himself from the car.
I nodded at him. "I promise."
He reached over and hugged me. "I'm so glad we found her."
"I just hope she's okay." I sighed.
He pulled back and nodded. He didn't say she will be, like I wanted him to. He said the truth, and it didn't help with the hope that was barely there for me.
"Me too."
I was going to lie to him, and go to school, but I was tired and exhausted from worry, so I got home and passed out with my jeans on.
When I woke up I immediately checked my charging phone to see I had a few missed calls from Erin's father and Connor. I called Connor back quickly and he answered with the news of Erin's destination.
"She's still at the coast hospital, and she fell into a coma." He said painfully.
I had no words at the moment, and instead stared at string of thread laced together that hung on my doorknob. It was her gift to me in fifth grade, a friendship bracelet. I gave her one back, and we never wore them. Instead we kept them hung around the curves of the door knobs to know we were always welcomed into eachother lives. Even if the door is closed, it'll always be unlocked.
"Diana?" Connor's voice echoes in my ear and I cleared my throat calmly.
"I don't know what to say." I said truthfully.
"I know." He said and I heard as he fished through his mind for the right words to say, but to save him the trouble I spoke before he did.
"I should go." I said.
"Yeah, me too... See you tomorrow?"
"Sure thing."
I layed back and didn't know how to take my mind off the gut wrenching hospitilization of my friend. The only person who really took my mind off things like that was Mr. Grant.
And my mind flew to him. Why couldn't I remember how it felt to look into his eyes? Why couldn't I remember the scruff of his scratchy beard against my cheek? Or how he smelled on top of me. Or how it felt to have him breathe into me, our lips not even centimeters apart...
If it wasn't for him, would I have found Erin? After all, he did allow me to leave and head to her house and watch as the police man raided her room.
I should call Andy.
I took my phone and called him, having to leave a voice mail that explained to him how everthing was alright, and she was in a coma. I knew he cared, and he was willing to find agents to search for my friend, not his friend, but mine.
What if I called him too? Charlie. I didn't know if it mattered to him. Of course it did, he cared enough to allow me to leave just to look for her. I decided to wait, and I could do that. Wait until I saw Mr. Grant next.
I showered and gathered all the homework I knew had to be done and did it. It was an easy way to take my mind off things, and once everything was finished, it was a little late in the afternoon. I thought smartly to eat dinner, and read a book as if nothing in my life was wrong.
I was on my couch in my empty home, reading peacefully until my phone rang, yanking me out of reality in a dramatic way. I saw the name and my heart skipped beats. He was actually calling me.
It was him.
"You weren't at school today." He said as soon as I answered.
"I know." I said back.
"Did something happen?"
I smiled sadly to myself and curled up to my side, enjoying how it felt to have him care about me. "We found Erin last night." I told him calmly.
"You did?" He asked in concern. "How is she?"
He cares.
I was quiet for quite a while and tried to think of how to explain what was going on. Did I even know what was going on? I didn't. "Diana?" He pulled me back and I felt like that had been happening to me a lot over the phone.
"She's... Uh, I found her at the beach. She's in the hospital over there and fell into a coma." I told him.
"I'm so sorry." He told me.
"I wouldn't have found her if it weren't for you." I told him.
"That's not-"
"Yes it is." I interrupted him.
He was quiet on the other end and I expected him to tell me goodbye or goodnight. But he didn't.
"Do you know what happened?"
I slid onto my back on the couch and stared up at the ceiling. It was so nice to hear his voice through the speaker, while there was silence at my house that made me focus more on how his deep voice could do many things such as put me to sleep, put me in a mood, make me unfocused.
"I don't." I answered him, while the question swam in my head, flying out and swinging along with the ceiling fan in the empty and quiet living room. What the hell happened to her? "When I found her she was on the ground and without a jacket, and freezing cold, and she was shaking. She looked so cold her skin was almost purple, and I don't even know if someone touched her because her face looked bruised and she was completely oblivious. She looked drugged, and it freaked me out so bad I didn't know what to do. It was dark out and she was laying there for who-knows how long, and when we got to the hospital she just looked worse and I-"
He began to shush me quietly, making me realize I was speaking almost a little frantically. "Diana, she's alive. Don't beat yourself up for no reason." His sudden soothing voice said to me.
I unnecessarily covered my face and breathed deeply, away from the speaker so he wouldn't be able to tell how shaken up I felt. Although I feared he already knew. "What did you teach today?" I found myself asking him.
A low chuckle on the end made me shiver and close my eyes to take it in. I only wished I could be there to watch him smile while he did. "Don't worry about that." He said. "All I had them do was work on the review, really."
I knew he didn't just have them work on the review, but I let it slide anyway. "Oh."
"How far have you gotten on it?" He asked curiously.
I laughed lightly. "I finished it."
"No you didn't." He retorted rudely.
I laughed again and stretched on the couch. "Yes I did."
"No you didn't, that packet was ten pages and you got it yesterday."
"I'm aware." I spoke slowly. "I finished it a few hours ago."
"Diana." He sighed out and I closed my eyes to savor the sound. "You never cease to amaze me."
I blushed under his words, and for some reason fought it although no one would see me. "Glad to know you underestimate me."
He barely chuckled when he said, "Shut up, we both know that isn't true."
"Do we?"
Now I began the flirting match, and he noticed immediately. His voice grew lower as it often did when he got like that and I could just feel the huskiness of his breath next to my ear. "Maybe it's because I don't quite know yet."
"Know what?"
"How you work."
Oh my god.
"I don't think I understand what you mean by that." I said thoughtfully, faking innocense.
"Well do you want to know?"
"Yes I do."
"I'd be careful with your tone if I were you." He said, sounding almost aggressive.
I chuckled darkly, "It's not like you can do anything." I said mischieviously.
"You wanna bet."
I shivered again, not caring how far the line of student and teacher had been crossed.
"You did say you wanted to know what I mean." He teased again.
"And I do, so tell me."
"Oh Diana, it's not a matter of telling..." He said lower than before, and I had to press the phone to my ear to listen. "I'd have to show you."
I squeezed my eyes shut and bit my lip to keep from the list of inappropriate things I wanted to say to him. What was happening to me? What was I even supposed to say to that? "Okay." I answered.
"Okay?"
"Yes, okay."
"Elaborate."
"I want you to show me." I said back to him, seeming to surprise him, but satisfying him all the while.
On the other end I heard him curse and a knocking came. "Hold on." He grumbled unhappily.
I heard as he left the phone and it sounded like he answered the door to someone. I couldn't hear the conversation, but he didn't sound very happy. It took up about five full minutes and I took that time to continue with my book. Soon enough I heard his mood-crushed voice on the other end speaking with me.
"Sorry about that." He said uncomfortably.
"Ah, don't apologize." I said passively, flipping a page in my book. I wanted to know who he was speaking to, and what he was talking about, but I said nothing and proceeded with my book.
"What are you doing?" He asked curiously, obviously being able to hear the sound of the pages turning and scraping against the base of my finger through the phone.
"Reading." I answered.
"Seriously? After you've finished that entire review-packet?"
"I'm doing this by choice." I admitted.
He chuckled again, but it wasn't like before and instead sounded more distant. "I don't think there is another person out there in this world like you." He said softly.
I felt so happy when he said it too. "I'm going to thank you on that one." I told him.
"That's fine. It was meant to be a compliment."
I smiled, knowing he couldn't see me. And it only encouraged me more.
A yawn came over me and he sighed on the other end. "Go to sleep, Diana."
I didn't want to stop talking to him. He made me forget about the unfortunate things, and he made me feel warm inside when he spoke to me like I was an adult as well. Or because he saw me as one. I wasn't sure why it meant so much to have him think of me as one, because everyone else thought so. I don't know why I liked that he wanted me to live like a teenager, but saw me as a woman. I didn't understand it, and I didn't understand myself, but I didn't care.
"See you tomorrow, Charlie." I sighed out.
"Sweet dreams." And he ended the call, leaving me blushing by the probably-meaningless words.
I would have sweet dreams, and hopefully he would be in them.
...
I flinched at the rubberband that was snapped at me and I looked up from my book, glaring at the man who sat back in his desk with an apple in his hand.
"What was that for?" I asked, looking around for where it went.
"Pay attention to me." He ordered.
"What do you want me to do, listen to you chewing your food?" I said sarcastically.
He glared at me and cracked his knuckles. "You're so nerdy, reading a book during lunch time."
I was about to brush it off, but then realized something, looking up at him slowly and narrowing my eyes carefully. "Mr. Grant." I said slowly.
He froze and looked back at me.
I stood up and walked over to him, seeing him go uncomfortable and squirm the slightest in his rolling chair.
I stood over him and grabbed the chair, turning it toward me and leaning into him. "Mr. Grant," I began with false innocense. "What did you do with my book?" I asked him as he stared back into my eyes.
"What book?" He asked back fakely, matching my tone.
"The Delta of Venus, you know what I'm talking about."
He raised an eyebrow, something I learned that I liked watching him do. "I'm pretty sure it's not your book." He said back smartly.
My hand gripped the back of his chair while the other touched his perfect-looking face. I leaned in closer and I was between his legs now, my mouth by his ear. It was funny because I never acted like that.
I didn't even know acting all sexy and stuff was a trait of mine until this terribly mean and beautiful man came along.
I was right by his ear when I calmly said, "So where is it?"
He moved his hand to grip the desk behind me and stood up, almost knocking me onto it. My hands layed on each of his shoulders and he trapped me between him and his desk. This lunch period had definetly escalated to a new level.
"I'd tell you, but a young girl like you shouldn't be reading things like that."
I couldn't contain the ironic smirk that came to me and I pulled him closer, sliding one of my hands down to his tie and tugging him forth. "What were you planning on showing me, Mr. Grant?" I asked, bringing up the previous phone call we both had.
My heart was vibrating as a beat and it excellerated so high, I knew it wasn't normal. All these things came to me when his hand slid to the small of my back and he leaned into my neck.
I waited for him to press his lips onto me somewhere but the goddamn bell rang and I groaned, falling back on his desk. I had to stop waiting for him to do it because he took too long.
Mr. Grant rested his hands back on the desk and pushed off after I said, "I should go then."
He didn't say anything when I gathered my things, but when I headed toward the door I heard him mumble, "Tease..." And I held in the embarrassed blush that was threatening to crawl up my neck and to my face.
"What was that?" I turned to him and asked in interest.
His eyes scanned over me quickly, lingering at the skirt I wore for a day of making up for all the times I had just been wearing only tshirts. And mostly for him, as well. "Nothing." He grumbled, turning away from me and looking out the window.
I snickered cynically and left the room, calling behind me, "See you in eigth Mr. Grant."
I knew for a fact that we were both to the point to where we both had the same affect on eachother. The only difference was how strong it was... For me, each minute I spent with him I found myself liking him more. And I often asked myself if this was the same man who once hated me so much. Then I would tell myself it wasn't.
I was eager to go to tutoring that day, because I was going to get him back for teasing me at his house, and I was going to make him pay. I thought to myself, feeling clever, but also suddenly very childish.
Since when did I flirt like a horny teenage girl? Since when did I focus on anything or anyone other than school? I slowly felt myself losing my independence, and what I feared most was I didn't mind too much.
What happened during lunch was me not wanting to go to he cafeteria, and Connor leaving school early for catching a cold. A cold.
I was walking to the library when we saw eachother, and he was holding a stack of paper, coming out from the copy room. He stopped walking and glared at me, in a playful way.
I stopped walking, too and crossed my arms.
He gave me a nod that motioned into his room and I hesitated to follow him, and he rolled his eyes at me. Neither of us had spoken a word until we got into his room where I ate a peanut butter and jelly, while reading a book and having him work on things.
I wasn't exactly sure why we enjoyed eachother's company so much, but it was comforting to know he wanted me around him.
I got a call from Andy during a class and couldn't answer it, and instead listened to his voice mail after the class ended.
It was him telling me he was relieved we found Erin, and how much he admired me for being a good friend and how he prayed nothing was wrong with her, and he hoped she'd wake up soon. He told me he wanted to take me out again, where ever and whenever I wanted because he could rearrange his schedule anytime for me.
I made a mental note, which I'd probably forget about, to call him after tutoring and give an answer. I didn't even know what my answer was...
Finally after pages and pages of work for health, the bell rang and I was on my way to Mr. Grant's classroom. It always surprised me to remember how much I feared this man, and how I dreaded going to his class.
But sure enough, there I walked in, making a split second of mischievious eye contact as soon as I did. I sat down and waited until the bell rang, tapping my pencil and recalling the afternoon at his house. Could I really wait to kiss him? But this was so wrong. It made me wonder if he'd even kiss me back.
The rules of student and teacher suddenly were a joke to me, and I was just eager to feel his lips. I haven't even thought of how they'd feel. I'm suddenly so brave.
The class seemed to drag on, but I got plenty from it. He never slowed down to a typical teacher's level but he stayed consistant with his speed in teaching and I was thankful it wasn't like it was before.
The bell rang after fifty-five minutes and I closed my eyes in relief. After the last person filed out the door closed I thought to myself if I would really do it. I was suddenly nervous, but I pushed that away. I was not going to lose this one, that was for sure.
"I see you paid attention today." His voice said from behind his desk.
I swung around and crossed my legs to look at him. "I see you paid attention to me paying attention." I said casually, having him raise an eyebrow while not knowing how much it affected me.
"Come here." He said, seeming to forget how that too affect me...
I stood up and brought my things, dropping them beside him on the desk. "Your worksheet?"
"Finished." I said, handing it to him.
He read it over and I watched his eyes scan the paper. They were so casual, so warm.
After he set it down he looked at me with an expression that said he was trying to look through me. "Why are you looking at me like that?" I asked him awkwardly.
"Do you want to know what I was going to say that day when your phone rang?"
I looked back in confusion because, unfortunately, that had happened way too many times... "That time where we talked about how you always thought I was..."
"Handsome?" I chuckled, looking back at him with such nerves. I don't know how I found the courage to look into his eyes and be so close.
To my surprise, Mr. Grant looked away, seeming almost embarrassed. I laughed again, but tried to control it. He rolled his eyes and they landed back on me. "Yes, do you remember?"
'You're-'
"I think." I lied.
He gave me a dry look. "I'm guessing you don't remember what I said?"
"Well I'm not sure since you didn't exactly finish your sentence." I matched his tone.
He touched my hand suddenly and I wasn't able to hold back the small flinch in me. "I was going to say that you're beautiful."
Woahhh.
I looked back at him in partly-controlled-shock, and it must've been amusing because he cracked a smile at it. Oh, his smile... "Well?" He said.
"Well what?" I narrowed my eyes, seeing his hand crawling up to envelope his own hand in mine. It was probably the warmest thing I felt, and so comfortable too.
He chuckled in that... Sweet and casual way. "What are you gonna say? You're just sitting there staring at me."
"What am I supposed to say to that?"
"Whatever you want to say."
The blush I had been holding back finally surfaced and I looked back at him. "Mr. Grant?"
He grunted a "Huh," in response.
I leaned into him and realized he had been leaning closer before I had. "Where is my book?" I asked in low curiosity.
His face turned to confusion, and I watched as it morphed into realization and he stood up, leaving the chill to get me. He slowly walked to the front of the classroom and I watched him looked around, delaying his time to tell me. I groaned and dropped my legs onto his chair. "Just tell me."
"Why do you want it so bad?"
"Because I haven't even finished reading it." I said back with attitude, making him frown.
"Why did you choose that one?"
"Haven't you asked me this before?"
"Answer my question."
I dropped my legs to the floor and stood up, approaching him very slow. "What am I supposed to even say to that? I chose it because I wanted to read it."
It's not like it was all that good.
Better than Fifty Shades of Grey, that's for sure.
"Why?"
"Why not?"
He groaned frustratedly and reached into his back pocket, pulling out the light gold book, which on the cover had ancient lettering. "You have it on you?"
He ignored me and held it, seeming to have no intention to give it back to me. I walked closer to him and tried to reach out for it, but he quickly walked back to the window and peaked out boredly, like he often did.
I sighed and leaned back on the wall, staring at him with crossed arms. He turned and looked at me, making me almost flush at intensity of him.
"It's so fucking hard to see you as a teenager, you know." He grumbled, looking back out the window.
I tilted my head, "What does that mean?"
"It means I shouldn't be talking with you like this, because you are a teenager."
"Talking with me like what?" I asked cluelessly.
"Diana, stop." He growled, leaning against his desk and continuing to look out the window.
I approached him again this time and he couldn't yet see me, but when he did, he tried moving back, but I grabbed his tie again and tugged him toward me.
A phone went off.
His, I assumed since it didn't sound like mine, but I was sick of interruptions and smashed my lips into his.
He reacted in shock, but soon to my own surprise he grabbed me roughly and kissed me back, making me lean against his desk while holding onto him. His hands roamed to my waist and pressed his body to mine, allowing me to feel the hardness of his chest.
I reached around him, trying to pay attention to the motive- which was so hard when his lips were better than I dreamt- and grabbed the book, pulling away him and hearing him groan in protest. "What was that about how to seduce someone properly?" I said smoothly, and he stood there in shock as I attempted to untangle myself out of his arms.
He held me tighter, not looking very happy. "You're not funny." He growled against me.
"I wasn't trying to be." I said flatly and his nostrals flared as I tried to at least loosen his grip on me.
"You think you're so fucking clever, don't you?" He snapped in my face, but I didn't fear him anymore.
"No, we're even now." I said slowly and watched his face fall a bit more.
"I see," He laughed cynically, but it wasn't a good sound. He was angry and I couldn't figure out why. "So this is just a game to you?" He growled in front of me.
I leaned back on his desk, trying to keep some distance between us but he only leaned closer into me. "What are you talking about?" I asked in both frustration and confusion.
"It is." He said to himself, looking up at the ceiling lividly and shook his head, looking back down at me and showing danger in his eyes. "I don't want to play in this game with you, Diana. So why don't you go screw Andy Carl for all I fucking care." He spat and released me, having me be frozen in confusion.
He turned back around and leaned against the window with a hand, looking out the window angrily, as he used to when he was an asshole.
I was still so confused. "Get out of my classroom." He grumbled, seeming to almost go back to the man I feared. The one who hated me. I still couldn't understand what I did wrong, and I reached out to take his hand. He pulled away from me like he didn't want me touching him, but I stepped up to him and didn't know what I was doing when I wrapped my arms around his waist.
He felt so comfortable to me in that moment, but he went stiff and I knew he didn't want me to touch him. I just didn't understand why. "I don't have a clue what you're saying, but I'm sure whatever it is, you're wrong."
"Get off of me."
I hugged him tighter.
"Diana."
I slid my hands up his chest and reached around his neck, pulling him down to me, and this time I kissed him softly. He immediately returned it just as gentle and put his hand in my hair. I was back to wondering if he was bipolar, and when he looped his arms around my legs and picked me up I was even more shocked.
It was perfect to me.
Shortly after, he dropped me onto his desk, and I remembered I was wearing a skirt because his hands slid up to my thighs, leaving me dazed in his kisses. I still wasn't sure if I could believe that he was finally kissing me back, and he was finally touching me. Those thoughts made me wonder how long I've thought about him. Or if I even did think about those things. Sure I thought of him, but I never thought of him with me.
His hands lingered at the trim of my skirt and I just wanted him to go for it, but I knew he wouldn't, because of how he stopped his hands as soon as he realized where they were headed to. When I needed to breathe he began to kiss my neck, and I took in how different it felt from Andy.
He leaned more and more into me and I was almost laid back on his desk with my legs wrapped around him. If someone were to come in, it would be extreme trouble for the both of us. But that wasn't the case.
His phone rang once more and he reached out to ignore it. A few seconds later it rang again, and he ignored it. I tugged him back up to my lips and he groaned into me while I did the same back, being sure to tug roughly on his perfect hair.
His phone rang again.
He pulled back in annoyance and grabbed his cell phone, still leaning onto me when he answered the phone both rudely and out of breath. "What." He grumbled into the phone and I smiled, trying to hold back my amusement, but I knew he caught it.
He was so close to me I heard the person on the other line speaking. "Chance! You've gotta come over, man. We just got like, ten bottles of liquor and Daphne bought me some wine and gave us the 'ok.'"
My eyes widened at that voice and Charlie stood up straight, pulled me up with him to sit upright on his desk. I looked around and noticed I knocked over some papers and pens of his and blushed.
I turned back to him and he had his hand rubbing his head in exhaustion. "Uh, I don't know, I have work in the morning and-"
"Call in sick!"
Ugh, Bailey...
Charlie looked back up at me and touched my face, speaking into the phone but not taking his eyes off mine. "I have a lot of work to take care of,"
I definetly caught his double-meaning and blushed again.
"Maybe this weekend."
My brother sighed on the other end of the phone and spoke with extreme casualty. "Alright, fine. I'll talk to Austin to see where we'll be. Probably Diana's house." He said and I glared at the phone, making Charlie chuckle quietly at me.
"Sure." Was all he answered with, and he hung up the phone.