When I woke up on Sunday, I found myself lying in an extremely uncomfortable position on the carpet of an unfamiliar room. My head was pounding, the effects of my nightmare still hazing my mind.
It had felt so real. And it killed me.
It had been years since I had a nightmare like that. The kind of nightmares that I had after the accident. When I had been taking the sleeping pills, every night I would have a terrible dream that felt like reality. They were usually about the accident too.
I had forgotten the effects of the nightmares after three years, but this dream gave me a rude awakening. I didn't feel relieved when I woke up. I felt completely drained of energy. But with this exhaustion, came the fear of falling asleep. And fear could be a dangerous thing. Fear of going to sleep was the very thing that had brought me to the sleeping pills three years ago. And I knew I couldn't go back. They would make things worse.
In fact, my night terrors were what made me plummet into depression. That terrible period of my life where I didn't eat and couldn't feel any emotion but sadness. That time when I lost the will to live along with my parents. Every day in my depression, felt like another heavy stone added to a mountain.
My depression wasn't something I thought about a lot. Mostly because I didn't like to think about how sad I was after the accident. I had actually forgot about it ever since I moved to Curmouth. I wasn't depressed when I was coming to Curmouth, but I was about a year before I moved.
The pills made my dreams worse. The dreams made my mood drop, sending me into depression. That was how they worked, like some sort of dream-team duo.
I had a diagnosis for depression too, even though my case wasn't as severe as most. I really didn't want to go back into that state of never eating and losing interest in things I once loved. The state where I would either cry from grief all day long, or feel nothing at all. I didn't want to be numb again. I wanted to be happy.
I was happy in Curmouth. I am happy in Curmouth. Right?
With this whole Will thing, I can't even think straight.
As I tried to ignore the sore pain in my back, I thought about yesterday. It had been wonderful at first. Jack had kissed me in the meadow. But then Tabitha was hospitalized, and everything went downhill from there. I didn't even want to think about Will. If he cared at all, he would apologize, but I'm not sure that he's in the apologetic mood. I am certainly not.
I pushed myself off the floor, and straightened my back. The absence of a clock rendered me ignorant of the time, and for all I knew, it could be two in the morning or two in the afternoon.
I decided to go back to my room to shower and change. I wasn't in the best shape. The designer jeans Hannah dressed me in had been digging into my skin all night, and I wanted to free myself from the fabric as soon as humanly possible. Judging by the raw stinging of my face, I must have cried pretty bad, which meant my skin was probably blotchy.
I left the dark room, and entered the hallways of the mansion, which were well-lit. It must be some time in the day.
Once I made it to my room, I stripped out of my clothes, and waddled into the bathroom to get in the shower. As I walked past the mirror, I stopped, stunned at my appearance.
My face was red and blotchy. Dried mascara tear trails remained from when Hannah had done my makeup before my date. I looked like a mess, and my hair was frizzy from the carpet.
I turned away from the mirror, not wanting to see myself. Honestly, it was a little frightening that Will had this effect on me. He couldn't ruin me. I wouldn't let him ruin me. I couldn't be depressed from one argument. I was stronger than that. Will would come back. He would apologize. It would get better. I just can't let it affect me.
The best way to do that, is to not think of it at all.
I quickly showered, and didn't glance at the mirror when I brushed my teeth. Then I dressed, picking out a nicer outfit than what I usually wore, just to help me from feeling bad about myself. I needed a mood-booster.
Once I was dressed, I checked the time, surprising myself by finding that it was already noon. I had been asleep a lot longer than I thought.
I sat down on the bed, reaching for my phone. Jack had said he would text me about Tabitha, and I hadn't looked at my phone for what seemed like an entire day. When I opened my phone, I was surprised to find that there were no texts or missed calls.
Nothing.
That was weird. Usually Jack was quick to check up on me. Not to mention, he had promised to tell me about Tabitha.
I frowned, and dialed Jack's number. I listened to it ring, before I was answered by his voicemail.
"Hey, sorry I couldn't answer your call. Leave a message, and I'll get back to you.", His voice said through the receiver.
After the phone beeped, I began to leave my message.
"Hey, Jack. It's Kendall. Just wanted to make sure Tabitha's doing okay. Call me when you get this.", I said timidly, sending the voicemail.
I turned on the ringer, and put my phone in my back pocket, just in case he tried to call. Then I set out to find Sophie. Now that he was back, Sophie should probably go home.
I walked to the guest room where she was staying and lightly knocked on the door. After the knock going unanswered, I slowly opened the door, checking inside. The bed was made, and not a single thing was out of place. The empty room looked as if she had never been in it.
This was the correct room. I was sure of it. Maybe she's with John? Probably. She wouldn't have gone anywhere else. She must be with John.
I walked quickly to John's room, and knocked. A few seconds later, John opened the door. Shirtless.
My eyes widened at the sight. He was only wearing basketball shorts, and his bare, toned chest was exposed, shining like a million suns. Okay. Maybe that metaphor was a bit exaggerated. But still, he looked like a freaking Abercrombie model. A freaking hot Abercrombie model.
"Kendall?", He asked in a surprised tone.
I forced myself to focus on his face. Just ask him the damn question. Ask him about Sophie.
"I- uh, I was wondering if Sophie was with you?", I choked out.
Just as he opened his mouth to answer, a voice from inside the room interrupted.
"John? Who is it?", A sleepy female voice asked from inside.
My eyes wandered to his room, where I found Zoey Dashwood standing by John's messy, unmade bed. The sheets were crumpled in a heap, and clothing littered the floor. Her long, tan legs were bare and she was only wearing one of John's shirts, looking at me with surprise and confusion.
Oh. My. God.
"Kendall?", Zoey asked, blushing red with embarrassment, confirming my thoughts.
I had interrupted their sexy time. Good lord. Please tell me this is not happening. They were doing the deed and I freaking knocked on their door. Oh, god.
"I-uh-I'm going to go.", I forced out, turning away from John, and practically sprinting down the hall.
I felt like vomiting. I'm not sure what I really expected. I mean, they were dating after all. I guess I just never thought about it. To be honest, the idea of John having sex with Zoey made me want to hurl. Not because it was disgusting, but because a small part of me hated the idea of John being with someone else. It was selfish of me. I have Jack, and he's everything I need. But it was envy, disappointment, and dissatisfaction that I felt. God, I needed to freaking pick one guy or none. I couldn't have it all.
I sighed. At least I did get an answer. Sophie was certainly not with John. So where was she?
I pushed out my encounter with John, focusing on finding Sophie. If she wasn't with John, then maybe she got hungry and decided to go to the Dining Hall?
I decided to check the Dining Hall, hoping desperately for her to show. If I couldn't find her, things could get messy.
I pushed open the violet door of the Dining Hall, revealing Sophie sitting at the long oak table. I sighed in relief. She wasn't lost.
I jogged over to her, my worry dissipating as I noticed that she eating a huge plate of waffles. Big, fluffy, appetizing waffles.
Focus, Kendall.
"Sophie.", I said, turning my attention back toward her, "I thought you had ran away for a second."
She looked up at me, maple syrup dripping down her chin as she grinned. "Nope! Francisco made waffles!"
I laughed. Francisco was the main chef at the Mason's household. I think he won some cooking show on the Food Network a few years ago.
"You want one?", She asked, raising her eyebrow with a smirk.
"Nah, I'll pass.", I said with a light chuckle, taking a seat next to her.
She shrugged, and began to stuff more waffles down her throat.
As I watched her, I couldn't help but feel a little sad that she would be leaving and going back to the Farnsworth's house. Even though she had only been staying with me for two days, she still felt like the little sister I never had.
Or future sister in law...
No, Kendall. We are not thinking about him. Not now.
"So, I have good news.", I told her, ignoring my thoughts, and pretending to look happy for Sophie's sake.
She looked up at me, her wide green eyes reminding me so much of him. "What is it?", She asked hopefully.
I took a deep breath.
"Will came back.", I said, trying hard not to choke on my own words. It was so hard to say his name out loud. It hurt. He had hurt me.
Sophie's eyes lit up. "He came back.", She whispered.
I nodded, fighting the sadness that was pricking at my eyes. "Yeah. He came back for you. I knew he would."
She set down the fork she was using, and pushed her plate of unfinished waffles away. Then she looked up at me, a smile still shining on her face. Why did she look so much like him?
"Thank you, Kendall.", She said earnestly, surprising me.
"You don't need to thank me.", I told her truthfully.
Will had saved me, twice, from those druggies. The very least I could do was spare his innocent younger sister from her father for two days, even if he was acting like a total ass. I hadn't helped Sophie because I had owed Will, or because he had owed me. It was simply something that you did when you gave a damn about another person. But in the end, he never cared at all.
And that was what confused and hurt me the most. Why would he save me? Why would he confide in me? Why would make me love him, just to say he had never cared at all? It didn't make sense. I wanted to convince myself that he was lying, but I couldn't. He meant what he said. I saw it in his eyes. He didn't care.
Sophie shook her head, as if I didn't understand what she was trying to say. "No. I really do. You may not get it now, but you've done a lot for the both of us."
I stared at her, shocked by her words. What had I done for Will? What good had I done, if all he did was hate me?
"Uh, d-do you want me to take you back now?", I choked out, trying to control the overwhelming urge to burst into tears.
"Yes, please!", She said with glee, getting out of her chair. I felt slightly relieved that she didn't notice my emotions.
I headed out of the mansion, followed by an excited little girl, and got into a car. Then we wordlessly drove back to the Farnsworth's house in comfortable silence.
When I pulled up to the curb, I immediately noticed his blue Lamborghini in the driveway. He was home.
My heartbeat accelerated instantly. Would he notice that I was outside? Do I want him to know?
"Bye, Kendall.", Sophie piped up, grabbing her backpack, and opening the car door.
I looked up at Sophie, my hands shaking. I needed to leave before I do something stupid. "Goodbye, Sophie."
Just as she was about to close the door, I stopped her, contrary to my initial thoughts.
"Wait, Sophie! Tell Will that... tell him that I care. That I wasn't faking it.", I blurt out.
Sophie widens her eyes at my words, and gives me a questioning look. "You guys got in the fight?", She asked, her voice sounding small.
I bit my lip, and nodded.
"I'll tell him.", She said with a sigh. "I'll try to keep him from doing something stupid."
"Thank you.", I said, feeling relieved yet anxious at the same time. At least he would know. But would he care?
With that, Sophie turned away, and marched into her house. Once she left, I let my head fall against the steering wheel. I just couldn't understand Will.
I was only trying to help. He needed help. His father needed to be locked away. Sophie needed to grow up in a safe home. I was helping him, dammit! It made me angry that he would push me away like that. I wasn't in the wrong! I can't do this anymore!
It took all my self-control to not march up to his door and lecture him. I was furious. I was sad. I was a mess.
I forced myself to drive away, leaving behind Will and Sophie. As I pulled away from the curb, I could have sworn that I saw someone peeking through a curtain on the second floor, a glint of blonde hair disappearing through the window pane. But the curtain closed so quickly that I couldn't tell if it was a figment of my imagination or reality.
When I arrived at the Mason's Mansion, I headed straight to my room to get ready for dinner. Between accidentally disrupting John and Zoey's intimate moment, and taking Sophie back to the Farnsworth's, most of my day had passed.
I was dreading dinner. Mr. Mason was supposed to return today, and he would surely have something new to announce. Also, things between John and I would most definitely be awkward. It still makes me shudder to think that I had interrupted them while they were... ew, I need to stop.
Although it had only been one day without company, I couldn't help but feel lonely. Maybe it was all in my mind, this loneliness. But Jack still hadn't texted me back, and Will was still absent. I almost liked it better when Will was missing, then when we were fighting. It really sucked.
By the time I made it to the Dining Hall, everyone but Mr. Mason and John were present. I took my seat next to Anna, and gave her a tight smile which she returned.
"Hey, Anna. Hey, Hannah.", I told them, scooting my chair in.
They both turned and smiled at me, returning my greeting. Seconds later, John and Mr. Mason entered the Dining Hall simultaneously. I couldn't help but notice that John avoided my gaze as he took his seat across from me, greeting his sisters and not me.
I felt a sharp jab of disappointment. He was avoiding me. He was probably just embarrassed. I would be.
Ms. Jameson and a few others promptly brought out the food, and laid it neatly on the long, oak table. Today it appeared to be some sort of authentic European cuisine. Whatever it was, it smelled delicious.
"So, Kendall.", Mr. Mason began, drawing me away from my thoughts of food. I looked up, surprised that he was talking to me. Usually he just began talking about his campaign, not speaking with anyone, but speaking to them. He always did put business first, and people second.
It was only once I noticed that the table was silent, and his steel grey eyes were looking at me expectantly, that it occurred to me to respond.
"Yes?", I asked, trying to cover my surprise with a polite tone.
"I was wondering if you would be interested in doing an interview with me on Saturday. For my campaign.", He explained in his business voice, eying me carefully.
My mouth dropped open in surprise. Wait a second. Me? An interview? Is this a prank?
I felt the curious eyes of Mrs. Mason, Hannah, Anna, and John watching me carefully, waiting my answer. My eyes were wide, and I still couldn't think of things logically. My answer had to be immediate, so I just said the first thing that came to mind.
"Uh, yes.", I blurted quickly, trying to wipe the stupid look off my face. What the hell was I supposed to do at an interview! I can't do that. I'm terrible at public speaking, I'll probably be even worse in an interview. What did I just get myself into?
He nodded with approval. "Good. CURMOUTH NEWS 4 will be there, recording it for Sunday news. It's a stellar opportunity to gain approval of the California citizens. It's very crucial that everything goes well. I'll have my publicist, Tori, prepare you."
"Okay.", I said slowly, the information slowly sinking in. My nerves were already sky-high and it wasn't even close to Saturday. I just know I would mess it up somehow.
"If you don't mind me asking, why am I being interviewed?", I asked him, confused. I'm sure everyone would be more interested in Mrs. Mason, or John, not the dingy foster daughter from Denver. I'm literally a nobody. Even I wouldn't care about the candidate for California Governor's foster daughter.
Mr. Mason looked up at me, not expecting me to say something. I could've sworn I saw something flash in his eyes, but it was gone so quickly that I was sure I imagined it. "Everyone is curious about the new addition to the family, that's all.", He said casually, busying himself with his cream cheddar bisque.
"There is a good opportunity in New York to join the Henderson Company.", He said, changing the subject fluently and turning the attention away from me.
Everyone turned their gaze back to Mr. Mason, but I didn't relax. Despite his explanation, I still felt confused about the interview. The whole thing was a bit off. It didn't make sense in my mind.
But if Mr. Mason asked, I had to do it. I had to do it if I wanted to stay in Curmouth. I had to do it if I wanted to stay in his good graces. And that was important. No matter what happened, life in Curmouth would be better than floating around in the foster system. I had gotten lucky for one time, and one time only when I came to Curmouth, and I didn't intend to ruin that over a simple interview.
The only thing was, my bad luck was something that haunted me everywhere, striking at the worst moments. It always caught up to me, no matter how fast I ran from it.
And a very important interview seemed like a fitting time for it to kick me to the ground and burn me alive.
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Hey crew! Happy #MachoMonday ! Hope you enjoyed the chapter! If you did, then please leave a vote/comment!
Who do you ship?
• #Khon -Kendall and John
• #Kack -Kendall and Jack
• #Kill -Kendall and Will
Chapter Questions [Tell me what you thought]:
•Kendall's past depression?
•Jack not texting Kendall?
•Kendall knocking when John and Zoey were getting it on?
•The aftermath of the fight with Will?
•The interview?
What do you predict for Chapter Thirty-Three?
Thank's a million for reading! Love you guys!,
Cora❤