Chapter Twenty-Eight
Shit.
He said them. The three words. Not Kyle's harsh ones. No, the L word. He said it.
My mouth dropped open as my heart started beating rapidly.
I wasn't ready for this. I wasn't ready for love.
The last and only person I've ever loved was Derek. And that didn't turn out any good.
What if it happened again? What if Luke—
"Babe? Calm down." Luke chuckled softly regaining my attention. "I'm sorry I shouldn't have—"
"Luke I'm not ready for love." I shook my head.
"It's okay Han, I told you, I understand if you don't feel the same way. We've only been together for a few weeks, but I just wanted to let you know how I felt."
I gulped. No. This was not what I needed right now.
"Come on," Luke got up and took my hand. "Let's get out of here."
I nodded taking his hand as he led me outside. "I'm sorry." I choked out once I had gotten some fresh air.
Luke stopped, wrapping his arms around my waist and looking down at me. "Don't apologise. I'm ready to wait." He then bent down and kissed me.
I kissed him back but it didn't feel right. It didn't feel like this should be happening.
That moment back in the restaurant should have been perfect. I should have jumped up and cheered or at least have said it back.
But instead I was upset. I didn't want that. And instead of focusing on what Luke had just said, my thoughts went back to only one person.
~***~
"I don't know what to do." I said the next day as I sat down at our usual table at Madison's.
"Well we all know you don't feel it back." Thanks for clearing that out Casey like I didn't already know.
"But I like him! I really do!" I exclaimed.
"Obviously not enough." Layna pursed her lips.
"He said he's prepared to wait. But now I feel like I'm being pressured into saying it." I sighed. "I'm scared. After Derek I'm not ready to love anyone yet. Love comes with complications. With trouble. With danger. And I don't to relive my past."
"Derek is the complete opposite to Luke. Luke is a nice guy. Damn, he's perfect for you Han. He makes you happy right?" Layna asked. I nodded. "Well then. Don't be scared because when the feeling comes you'll have to tell him."
I had a feeling though, that it never would.
"And while it's making its way to you, you should get your mind off Luke. He's going away for the weekend right?" Casey asked. Once again I just nodded. "Great, well then we're going to Mia's party tomorrow night."
"No. No. I don't think that's a good idea." I shook my head. Actually I knew this was a bad idea.
"Oh please Hannah! Luke will be away so there will be no chance of bumping into him—"
"Kyle. What if I bump onto Kyle?"
Layna let out a laugh. "No offence to Mia because I've grown to like her quite a lot since her and Jake have started ... doing whatever their doing, but come on, since when does The Kyle Richards attend party's held by people like us. Like Mia?"
She was right. Kyle had too much pride. A reputation to hold up. He wouldn't let himself be seen at a party held by an average non attention seeking girl like Mia.
"Fine." I sighed. "I'll go."
~***~
My decision the day before resulted in me standing in front of the mirror in Casey's room checking myself out.
I had chosen to wear a black and gold tribal print bodycon dress which didn't please Casey who wanted me to dress more... out there. My excuse was that I didn't exactly want to attract more attention to myself especially not from guys.
"Hey, how's you and Matt?" I wriggled my eyebrows realising that I haven't seen much of Matt and Casey hadn't mentioned him ever since the corridor incident.
She shrugged. "There's no me and Matt. I haven't spoken to him since the corridor situation."
I furrowed my eyebrows. "So he hasn't called you or texted?"
"No? Why would he?"
"I don't know. Because he has a crush on you!" That bastard. I actually gave him my best friends number and he didn't even bother texting her.
"No he doesn't. I made it so obvious though. So cringe." She blushed.
I went back to tying the shoe laces on my high heeled ankle boots. "Casey I swear I've never seen you blush until he smiled at you."
"Shut up. Not true." She dismissed. "Now come on. We don't want to be late." She grabbed her bag as I grabbed mine and we made our way to her car.
Stupid decision as we both knew that neither of us would be in the state to drive it back. But we had to get there somewhere.
The party hadn't even started before I was already tipsy. Surprisingly Matt had come up to me and Casey and asked for a dance before dragging my overly excited best friend towards the dance floor.
It didn't take long for me to realise that if someone like Matt who was Kyle's best friend had attended a party like this that Kyle would most likely have attended too.
That just motivated me to get drunk quicker.
And let's just say that after two hours, a beer and 4 shots of tequila, I wasn't the calm, worried, nervous Hannah Jones I was a couple of hours back.
Instead, a different kind of Hannah had taken over me. A Hannah who preferred to shout the song lyrics over the music instead of sing along. A Hannah that preferred to use the bar counter to dance on instead up the nicely polished wooden dance floor that everyone else was using.
Pfft too mainstream for someone as cool as me!
And so as Hey Brother by Avicii came on, I let the song take over my mind and my body swayed in tune with the music.
That was until I heard a firm husky voice. "Get her down from there before she slips and kills herself!"
My eyes shot open and automatically focused on the dirty blonde tall boy standing a few metres away watching me intensely.
"Nope!" I shook my head wildly. "This is my dance floor. You can't take this away from me!"
Kyle rolled his eyes taking a few steps forward until he reached the bar. "We'll see about that princess." He placed his firm hands on my waist and lifted me gracefully off of the counter.
I bit my lip coyly batting my eyelashes. "You're my prince in shining armour. Except..." I checked him out shamefully. "There's no armour and you're not riding a pink unicorn." My eyes widened in excitement. "Unless you parked it outside! I want to see it!" I pushed past him trying to get to the exit but he managed to grab my arm.
"Not so fast princess!"
"I want to see the unicorn!" I stamped my foot almost tumbling because of my high heel.
Kyle chuckled, tightening his hold on me. "You're hammered."
"Was that a pun because I'm half Polish?" I asked slightly offended.
"What?" Kyle obviously didn't get his own joke. What a silly billy.
"You're such a silly billy!" I tapped his nose. "You know? Polish? Builders? Tools? Hammered?" I burst out laughing. "I'm so funny! Don't you think I'm funny Kyle?"
Kyle looked down at me, trying to suppress a laugh obviously amused. "You're hilarious princess."
I flicked my hair dramatically. "I know!"
"I think it's time to get you home." Kyle said taking my hand.
"But I want to see the unicorn!" I whined.
Kyle carried on dragging me towards his car. "The unicorn is waiting for you at home."
I gasped. "Really? Oh my god!" I bit my lip excitedly, while getting in the car.
"Yup. Really." Kyle nodded starting the engine.
"Can we call it Jeff? I think Jeff is a good unicorn name! Don't you think Jeff is a good unicorn name? Unless..." I tapped my chin with my index finger. "What if the unicorn is a unicorness a.k.a. a female unicorn? Then I can't call her Jeff!" I exclaimed but my voice wasn't as excited. I was forcing to keep my eyes open.
Kyle chuckled. "Jeff is perfect." That was the last thing I heard before darkness took over.
~***~
I found it difficult adjusting my eyes to the bright light surrounding me.
"You're awake." A low husky voice commented.
Shit. Shit. Shit. Fuckety fucking fuck. Why the shitting fuck was Kyle Richards in my room?
"What are you doing here?" I muttered.
"You sound sexy like that." He chuckled. Oh that chuckle was music to the ears.
"Seriously Kyle— shit my head is pounding." I winced biting my lip.
"Where do you keep your medicine?" Kyle asked.
"Bathroom cabinet." I muttered.
Kyle disappeared but came a few seconds later with a pill and glass of water. "Here take these."
I wasn't on the friendliest terms with him so maybe I shouldn't trust the pill he was holding out to me, but at that moment the pain was so bad I was ready to take anything.
"What time is it? I asked.
"Like, five I think. I brought you here at midnight so you've been asleep for a bit." Kyle took his seat at the end of my bed.
"You brought me here?" I cocked an eyebrow.
"Well it was either me or you'd be sitting outside Mia's house waiting for a pink unicorn to come for you." Kyle chuckled as my eyes widened.
"Fuck. Are you serious?! That's so embarrassing!" I cringed hiding my face in my hands.
"Well you called me your prince charming." He smirked.
I got off my bed and looked for some underwear and pyjama vest top. "I must've been hammered then." I told him.
"Speaking of, you made some joke about that too." He chuckled. "I never knew you were half Polish."
I pursed my lips grabbing my pyjamas. "Well there's a lot of things you don't know about me Kyle." I heard him chuckle again before I closed the bathroom door.
I quickly threw off my dress and put on my clean underwear and loose vest top.
Why was I not mad at Kyle? I was furious at him earlier today and for the whole week! He owed me an apology! I blamed the alcohol. Yes, I don't know what was in those shots but whatever it was, it was messing with my head.
As I entered my room again I felt Kyles eyes scan my body as he stood up from my bed and walked up to me.
"Damn you look sexy." He bit his lip as he pushed me against the wall.
My heart raced at how close our lips were to each other's. Suddenly the racing turned into pounding as without warning Kyle placed his lips on mine pushing me harder against the wall.
Uncontrollably my arms swung around his neck bringing his face closer to mine. I kissed back biting his lower lip teasingly as he let out a moan. I was completely caught in the moment, tangling my hands in his hair as his lips trailed down my jaw line and to my neck finding my weak point. I gasped at the feeling as my eyes shot open.
I pushed Kyle away realising what was happening.
"Shit Kyle." I cursed. We were both breathing heavily.
He let out a frustrated sigh backing away from me. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have kissed you."
Fuck. If I hadn't cheated on Luke on Sunday then I sure as hell had today. "No you shouldn't have."
"You're clearly not fully sober yet, I shouldn't have taken advantage of you like that." He breathed.
What have I done? What was wrong with me? Maybe it was because I was drunk! Yes! I could blame the alcohol! But we both knew that was a pointless lie. We both knew the truth. I cheated on my boyfriend with his enemy. I chose to cheat on my boyfriend with Kyle. I broke my promise to Luke. I chose Kyle over him.
"I should leave now—"
"Kyle, wait." I couldn't be left alone right now. Not with what just happened. "I don't want to be left alone. Stay with me, please."
Kyle was like the forbidden fruit. The guiltier I felt about hurting Luke and the more I tried making myself stay away from him, the more I wanted him.
A/N:
So let me start of with
HAPPY NEW YEAR GUYS!!! WISH YOU ALL THE BEST FOR 2014!
WOOP WOOP!!
I dont feel like this is a strong chapter but I hope you liked it anyway :)
Thank you xx
Hannah's Outfit: http://www.polyvore.com/stay_with_me_please/set?id=97559451