The invigorating sound of my alarm clock woke me up from my restorative slumber. I frowned and lazily turned over and slammed my hand down on it.
I groaned as I lifted myself up. Suddenly, my mind went fuzzy. I tried remembering my dream last night, but the remnants of my dreams were being chased away by the realization that I'm awake, that everything was real. I managed to get up from my bed and make my way over to the closet. And then I remembered what happened last night, which made me even more grumpy.
I'm in Paris, without him.
Making myself some pancakes, I also made a matcha tea for me to enjoy and make my own self happy to start the day, somehow. And as I tried forgetting how I cried last night, I ate my breakfast slowly as I savored each bite. But my phone ringing, signalling me that it's already eight o'clock in the morning made me hurry in haste. "Hello?" I answered the phone.
"Where are you, Alex?" A rich polish accent voice boomed from the other line as I sighed.
Not wanting to trigger my sister's anger, I quickly settled my phone over the lavatory while I stripped my clothes and turned the shower on. "I'm on my way, give me like fifteen minutes and I'll be there." I told her and my bathroom was filled by sister's voice, giving me lectures on how I should be more responsible, and be more ladylike.
Why did I even agreed on this whole set up anyway?
Well, I was doing fine. We were doing fine. Everything was fine but at one second, I was confused too though, I'll be a model for em cosmetics? The management must be crazy. My sister must be crazy. What can I do? She's THE Michelle Phan. I have no goddamn right to argue and contradict his choices and decisions. Yeah, that's it. That's why. She's holding my career, my job in his hands. It's the half of my life in risk. What can I do? I have no regrets though, I'm here with my sister anyway, except that we live separately, and that we're the only one who'll have and who'll be there for each other for our parents had already passed away. Patience, just patience because this is what I've always dreamed of too, as she guides me growing up and is currently teaching me how to be independent.
But I just wish that he was with me, too.
Snapping out of my thoughts, I heard a honk and I quickly stormed my way down to see the familiar car. "You're a minute late." I said a quick sorry and chuckled at my sister.
Don't get everything wrong. My sister is a nice, well mannered, classy woman. She is just being like that because I know that she wants me to be the best, and that's her nickname while the middle would be perfectionist. She was the one who did everything just to raise me and her when we were in sorrow back then, a couple of years ago. I bet, if our parents were still alive, they'd be so proud of her. Especially my dad which happens to be a successfully aligned and business minded man. And with that, I'll always look up to my sister.
She started telling me that I should get on with the photo shoot right away, and that no time should be wasted. I listened to her words, and looked out the window to see the beautiful Paris environment. And then I remembered Los Angeles, again. My friends, my dancing career, and Sean Charles Lew. I'm missing him again, and I bit my lip to stop myself from crying.
Closing my eyes a bit, I sighed. "You'll be fine, Alex. You and Sean will be perfectly fine, stop overthinking." I whispered to myself.
The time went by pretty fast and luckily, my sister let me roam around Paris for a while as long as I'll be back home to my apartment before it was nine, my curfew. I chuckled at that, I'm eighteen but I still have a curfew. The cold breeze of Paris night air traveled its way and explored my body making me shiver, so I pulled my coat closer for I wanted to get some air and contemplate what would my life be. And then I accidentally shifted my eye on my wrist. It was a Pandora bracelet given to me by Sean when it was our anniversary, and our graduation day.
Fuck. I'm thinking about him again.
And then I wondered what he must be doing right now. It's just four in the morning in Los Angeles. Too early for me to call him or something which was hard, it's so hard. We both can't figure out how to keep this relationship going with a proper healthy communication. I hope we'll come up with something soon, and that I can spend time with him. Even if it's just on FaceTime or something.
Letting out a heavy breath, I looked up to admire the Eiffel Tower's beauty.
@alexphan: wish you were here @seanlew1125
Before I could even tear up, I went straight home because today was was tiring too. Putting my phone in my coat's pocket, I started heading back home to my place when I heard something crack behind me. I carefully turned to see nothing, and I pulled my coat closer to my body because it was chilly, and the night made it harder for me to see because there were little amount of street lights.
Sighing, I brushed the bad thought off. And then when I was in front of my house that my sister bought me, I heard another muffled noise behind me. I turned around to look at what it was, because it's bothering me when someone grabbed my arm, pulling me inside my house, and pushed me up against the wall.
I was about to scream when a pale, cold hand covered my mouth, making my scream muffled. "P-please, please d-don't hurt me." I begged and whispered to the guy or someone, shutting my eyes closed and gulping.
"Why would I hurt you, baby?"
That voice was too familiar. Opening my eyes slowly, I was expecting someone like a creeper, but the handsomely beautiful boyfriend of mine. It was a grinning Sean in front of me. I let out a breath of relief.
Pushing him out of the way, I cussed. "Fuck you, you scared the shit out of me Charles!" I glared at him and he just smiled at me showing his dimples and followed me inside my house. "I thought you were some psycho trying to rape me, then kill me after." I told him and he sat on my couch and he has this smirk plastered on his face.
He pulled me and I stumbled down on his lap. "Oh baby, it's not rape if you like it." He told me.
Rolling my eyes at him. "You know what? I missed you so much but fuck you for that." I said and he just chuckled.
He made me face him and kissed me full on my lips, and he even bit my lower lip, making his tongue explore my mouth. It's funny how I am enjoying this even if I hated him for a second. Well, I missed him anyway. He pulled me closer, and he invaded my whole. I am now breathing heavily and sweating. Wanting him more. And then his mouth moved to the nape of my neck. He bit it, and sucked it. And he even licked it after a good suck. Shit, my knees are starting to get weak. So I closed my eyes. He is dominating each and every part of my mouth as his lips synced with mine. "Let's get married, Alex." He whispered and bit my ear lobe. I was too lost and my brain was invaded for me to process his question properly. He pulled away, but I don't want him to stop so I claimed his lips again. I want him close to me, I want to feel his lips on mine. I want to feel him. "Tell me you'll marry me, Alex." He pulled away and he looked at me straight in the eyes, resting my forehead on mine.
Gasping for air and finding the words to respond, I huffed. "Yes." I said. "I'll marry you, Sean." And with that, he crashed his lips with mine once again and felt him smile in the kiss. I was shocked at what I said, but we're already in the right age. And even if my sister would kill me, I didn't mind because I can't dare lose the love of my life. I wrapped my arms around his neck, deepening the kiss. He too strong, he lifted us up and walked to wherever and I was surprised when my back was flat on a bed, my bed.
He broke the kiss and smirked. "You may think that I'm just playing with you. But baby, I'm fucking serious and I'll marry you soon, beautiful." He told me and pushed himself to me again and then he squeezed my ass, keeping a hold so that I wouldn't be able to get away from him anymore. He moved to my neck to where my hickey, his mark on me, is and then shit. He licked it.
Moaning, I tried to utter some words. "I love you, Sean." I managed to say even if I was stammering. He lifted me up when I pulled away, and then fixed me flatly on my bed as he pulled the covers over us.
He kissed my forehead. "I love you too, Alex, always." He told me and he pulled me closer.
Looking up to him, I asked him something. "But how about my sister, your dance career, everything?" He chuckled and just smiled at me.
"I wouldn't be here if there were problems, baby girl."
*****
i hope your friend alex would like this, lexie. :--))))
okay im sad. i have to tell u something. i'll be updating slower, and i wouldnt be able to post everyday. bec i'll be busy abt fixing everything for school prepping for junior year next academic year. im rlly sorry, like so so so sorry. but at least i'd update right? thank you so much for the love and support. theres not a day that i'd think about my readers and everything.
love u guys to infinity and beyond.