(Liam's POV - Sat. 22 March 2014)
"Liam!" Joshua shouts as I immediately pounce toward the lockers room while he just came to a halt by Aaron's office, making me stop in my tracks in a screeching noise and scamper back to him.
"Yes...?" I ask, panting a little.
"Are you that much in a hurry?" he asks, half-annoyed, half-smiling. Hmm... yeah... I am, though not for the reasons you're thinking of...
"Well, I don't have much time to prepare... and I'd like to talk to Jeremy a bit..." I whine, ready to turn on my soles again and head back.
"Oh yes... the ceremony... You two are such gossip girls sometimes," he chuckles.
"Hey!! We're not gossip girls!!" I argue, knowing that he is just trying to tease me.
"Okay, gossip boy... Whatever... Go ahead then, but make sure that you meet me at the Black Diamond by nine the latest," he says, dismissing me. Finally!
"I will!" I shout, already running back toward the lockers.
"Liam!" he shouts again, causing me to stop my course once more.
"Whaaaat...?" I shout back, now getting irritated by his little game. When I turn around and see his scowl, I realize that I should pay a bit more attention to my tone... He raises his right index finger, and motions it to beckon me to him, and I walk back until I stand right in front of him. His hand moves to capture my chin between his index and his thumb, lifting it up to make my eyes meet his dark blue ones.
"Now you don't want your first public performance to be a punishment scene, do you?" I shake my head and in return, he cocks his head to the side, pointing his left index to his ear.
"No, Master..." I whisper.
"Much better... now I want my kiss before you go." Suppressing a sigh, I stand on my tiptoes and peck his lips before I finally run back to the Subs' room.
Argh... he just made me lose at least three minutes of my precious time this evening and I didn't need a reminder that we are performing our very first public scene tonight. He has been bugging me about it for the last two months but my eternal I'm not ready was getting a bit old, so I decided to finally give in to his request. He has taken me there slowly but surely, pushing me further and further in my limits over the time. It started with groping me publicly while we were watching the shows in January; then in early February, each evening we spent at the Black Diamond was ending in a hot make-out session on the couch; a bit later that same month, he unzipped the fly of my leather pants to stroke me and made me cum while I was sitting on his lap; and finally, his last brainwave was to make me suck him off while he was watching the show a couple of weeks ago. The gradual evolution of our relationship in public has yet succeeded to make me feel more at ease though and I can tell that I am ready for this first public performance now. Almost.
Since the beginning of the year, we have been going to the club at least two or three times a week when he doesn't travel, even if we don't stay very late. And needless to say that all these little experiences happened in public and of course in the presence of his friends who were doing quite the same with their own current Subs when they had one. When we came here on Tuesday evening this week, Joshua once again allowed me to sit on his lap and just as the lights dimmed in the room, he bit my earlobe and said: "You'd better enjoy the show for the last time Pet, because next time we're here, it'll be you and me on the stage. And this is an order." That left me frozen at the moment and I absolutely didn't enjoy the show at all, completely focused on imagining him and me performing on the dais.
I could safe word if I really need to tonight. However, over the past five months, I have learned to trust him and his ideas. Joshua has only kept me going a little bit further every day, pushing my limits but always in a very gentle and gradual manner. As a matter of fact, he never turned out wrong and I was always able to deal with whatever he was putting me through. I have become his perfect little Sub as he says and each time he praises me, my chest fills up with bliss, so once again, I am going to trust him and perform the damn scene tonight. I don't even know what we are going to do exactly. Joshua said that it was best for me not to know so that I wouldn't rehearse the scene in my head over and over, but he promised that it would be soft.
The major drawback is that I won't get to spend time with my friends on the dance floor because Joshua wants me to join him at the VIP area at nine sharp in order to concentrate and relax with him before we go on stage. That would have been okay on any other day but I desperately need to speak with Jeremy tonight because he owes me some... explanations. Yesterday evening was the night he got collared by Master Gary and unfortunately Joshua and I were not able to be at the club. This means that I barely have an hour to prep, get dressed and get my friend to tell me about the ceremony.
"Heyyyyyyy!!! Who's ready for his first time!!!!???" Jeremy squeals as I walk into the Subs' room and find him in his boxer briefs by the lockers, sporting a brand new leather collar around his neck.
"Shhh!!! You don't need to shout that out loud," I scold him as we hug each other quickly.
"Liam... You know that all these people will be at the Diamond later tonight, so just don't fret... It will be a great experience, I promise!" he cheers me up.
"Argh... If you say so..." I mumble in annoyance.
"Liam, I swear you're gonna enjoy it.
"I'm just scared to fuck up..."
"And you won't, because Master Joshua is great and he wouldn't force you to do it if he thought that you're not ready... Just relax!" Jeremy reassures me.
"Oh wow... you look so proud..." I whisper, pointing my chin at his collar, while I undress and start gathering what I need for my preparation.
"I am..." he replies, blushing a little when he brushes his fingers against the shiny leather of the collar. "Master Gary has also changed our contract to a permanent one! He says that it is useless to renew it every quarter because he wants it to last forever. I really love him, Liam..." Jeremy says, his voice full of emotion. Their relationship has grown to something very strong over the last three months. As both Jeremy and Joshua explained to me, they had been together a few years ago already, though just for a few months, and their affair back then had stopped only because of Gary's professional career when he needed to move to Asia for a couple of years. At the time, Gary had left Jeremy behind, of course allowing him to live his life and taking the risk to find him with another Dominant when he'd return. As soon as he came back from Asia, Gary was relieved that Jeremy was available and immediately proposed him a new contract, but both of them having matured in the time span, their relationship quickly grew to something much deeper that anyone could easily notice when they perform public scenes. Their show is always extremely intense and one can see that they clearly belong to each other.
"That's great! I'm really happy for you!" I cheer, giving him a tight hug. "So how was the ceremony?"
"Oh it was... quite simple," he says with a mischievous smile. "He just asked Master Aaron if he could do it in his office, so that was just the three of us, and then..." he lingers, biting his lower lip, "it ended up in a long night of sex in a private room... We went back to his place early in the morning and I woke up like two hours ago, ready to see you perform!!!!" he cheers, grabbing my arm and dragging me toward the showers. "Let's get you perfect for tonight, I'm gonna help you!"
"I think I'll manage on my own..." I protest, but Jeremy being a little more built than I am - though I can see the slight changes on my body since I started to work out-, he has no difficulty to shove me into a stall and from that follows a whole series of body care which starts off with a meticulous shaving of my body that has him kneel in front of me while he removes every single hair I could have forgotten. The only thing he lets me do on my own - thank God!!! - is my enema. All the time he keeps repeating all the advice that I have already received from everyone here regarding the performance of a scene in front of an audience and he promises me that I am about to reach cloud 100 tonight. I try my best to believe him, but in reality, the only thing that I hope for is that I won't mess up and disappoint Joshua.
Prepping with Jeremy doesn't take as long as I would have thought and half an hour later, we are all clean and dressed, still having a good twenty minutes ahead before I need to meet Joshua. Just as we are packing our clothes into our duffel bags to place them in the lockers, Chris, one of the masochistic Subs of the club arrives and puts his bag on the bench behind us. I notice the discomfort on his face when he removes his zipped hoodie. I have rarely spoken to him although Jeremy knows him quite well, but he is a kind guy and I can't help asking if everything is okay.
"Yeah, yeah... Master Andrei just let himself go a little yesterday evening..." he says, hissing as he pulls out his sweater, revealing his striped back. I just can't suppress a gasp when I look at the thick and red puffy lines streaking his back. There are only a few masochistic Submissives at the club - just seven or eight at the moment - who pair with Dominants like Camden and often bear the marks of whips but these are never permanent. However, what I see on Chris's back is much worse than whatever I may have witnessed before and I doubt that they won't leave scars.
"Oh God..." Jeremy whispers. "It's not just letting oneself go Chris... These must have bled..."
"Don't worry, I'm okay... and you know that this is how I like it..." Chris sighs.
"Maybe not to that point though..." Jeremy comments bitterly.
"How can you like this... pain?" I ask him shyly and a large smile spreads on his face.
"That's the difference between the masochistic Subs and the non-masochistic Subs, buddy," he simply answers, softly tapping the tip of his index finger on my nose. "Pain makes me hard and brings me to the highest climaxes..."
"That's probably why I'm not a masochist... I can deal with some pain but not that amount..." I reply, shuddering at the thought of how painful this must be.
"Don't worry, I can endure much worse than that. Masochism is not all about physical pain anyway, at least in my case. Mental pain can be extremely pleasurable too. And when both mingle, Man do I get high..." he chuckles. "Jerem, can you please help me to put some unguent?" Chris then asks, handing him a tube. "Master Aaron just gave it to me and this is to nourish the skin and it has a little anesthetic too..."
"Sure..." Jeremy says and begins to apply the unguent on the guy's back, making him hiss a little each time he brushes a wound that exudes more than other. "What happened that made him go out of line?"
"I don't know... I could tell that he was tense when I joined him, but he was still in a rather good mood. He even spoke for a while with Master Aaron who had stopped by our table..." Chris explains. "By the way, congratulations on your collaring..."
"Thanks..." Jeremy replies. "So what got into him? Did you do something wrong?"
"No... nothing really happened, but the tension never left him as the evening went, and right after the first show, he took me to the private room he rented for the night and I thought I was in for something rough... He almost looked angry but he never mentioned a punishment or anything like this... He just... Well he just tied me as he would normally do and used the same instruments as usual. The session ended with a whipping like every week-end. It was just a bit more intense and the lashes got harder and harder," Chris explains before he turns back around and puts on a black transparent tee-shirt.
"Why didn't you safe word?" I ask innocently, looking at the young man. Chris is rather cute although this new color of hair is still hard to get used to. He used to have light brown hair but since he became Master Andrei's Sub a few weeks ago, it has been dyed in jet black and it hardens his facial features... probably a request from his Dominant.
"Because I didn't need it... I don't think I could have taken much more, but Master Andrei stopped in time and he was extremely gentle after that. There was no more tension and sex was great..." Chris replies with a smile. Well... the guy has to really be a masochist because I don't think I would have enjoyed a single slap of the whip myself and I am glad that Joshua doesn't practice that kind of instrument.
That brings me to wonder why the Sadists and the Masochists are like they are. As Joshua explained to me a long time ago, all the Dominants have a sadistic side in them and all the Submissives have a masochistic one; it just varies in intensity from one to another and I can understand that because I do like a little pain. I like the lashes of a flogger on my backside, even when Joshua makes it stronger during a punishment, but I don't think I would ever appreciate the cane or the whip. I also know that Joshua like to administer that pain to me because that's when he usually gets the hardest and roughest. However, what makes guys like Chris revel in receiving more intense pain? And what makes Dominants like Camden get their kicks in delivering more intense pain? That's something I'd like to discuss with Joshua at some point.
Since Jeremy and I are both ready now, we walk out of the Subs' room and head toward the Black Diamond, my friend trying to reassure me that everything will go well. Over the last few months, we have discovered that we have a lot of tastes in common and we have become very good friends. We can talk for hours about our Doms and how they are with us. We spend most of our time at the club together, although Ed, Mick, Eric and Tony often join us, however, Jeremy is the one I feel more at ease with. I feel like I can tell him just about anything and when I have doubts or concerns that I don't want to tell Joshua about, he is the one I am turning to, like I would do with Shan if he were in the lifestyle. I realize that once again, Joshua was right when he said that I would need to communicate with other Subs because I certainly wouldn't be able to discuss these things with my best friend.
These concerns are never serious and it is more about getting his opinion or advice on how I should behave or react. My major concern recently has been about the growing feelings I have for Joshua and how scared I am to admit it to him because I am not too sure that these are reciprocal. Jeremy's opinion on the subject is that Joshua is a very reserved person who probably has difficulty to express what he really feels. He told me that Joshua has never kept the same Sub for more than six months and since we are slowly getting to this deadline, I begin to fear that he will put an end to our agreement shortly, even if Jeremy doubts about it. He said that Joshua has never looked at any of his previous Sub the way he looks at me and that his eyes show something different when I am around.
I really like our relationship as it is for now, but sometimes I wish we could take it a bit further. Since the beginning of the year, we have kept it as we have agreed, which means that I spend at least three week-ends per months at his place and when he doesn't travel, I also often stay with him one or two week nights. All in all I am quite satisfied with our schedule because for one, it allows me to keep enough distance and my feelings at bay; then I am able to spend enough time with Shannon although he often complains about my absence; and finally, even if our relationship is still that of a Dominant and his Submissive, Joshua often takes me out on dates and we also took two week-ends out of Chicago, one of which was at an isolated cabin he owns in Montana where we spent the better part on the sofa bed in front of the fire place... So I still get that boyfriend relationship too, but I would just like to make it grow a little more...
I know that it is complicated because he is also my boss and even if he likes exerting his dominance over me there as well, this part will soon have to stop since Ally is returning from her maternity leave in less than two weeks. Technically he will always remain my big boss, but I will have to move to another department and I can't imagine doing the things we often do in the office while his assistant is around... As of now, only Tony and Allan know about our relationship and although I once heard a remark about myself being the boss's slut - you can easily guess that it was coming from Dominic and I don't know who he was talking to since he was on his phone - , I don't think that anyone else knows about us. To our credit, we always make sure to remain discreet and quick enough, and we keep on meeting further away from the office when we leave at the same time, but how long are we going to keep it a secret, I don't know.
When Jeremy and I walk into the Black Diamond, we both immediately spot Joshua and Gary talking together and having a drink at the bar, so we head in their direction barely noticing anything else around us. I can tell how my friend is eager to reach his Dominant by how he accelerates his pace, but I feel the same for my own Dom so I gladly keep up with him, feeling my heart pick up its rate the closer I get to him.
Joshua's looks when he only wears his leather pants will never cease to amaze me, but this is probably due to the fact that I am so used to seeing him in perfectly fitted business suits that make him so elegant. His taut torso and his strong arms always inspire safety and comfort to me; he totally represents dominance in itself. As soon as our eyes meet, I immediately look down, but this is not before I have caught sight of the warm smile on his face. When I finally reach him and he wraps his fingers at the back of my neck to pull me into his arms and kiss the top of my head, all my worries about our upcoming performance fly away at once. Safe and horny is how I feel; his body is what I lust for.
Published on 20 Oct 2016
So here we are, entering the second half of the book. Sorry if you expected Liam's first public scene to be in his POV, because it'll be in Joshua's and in the next chapter :)
Thanks for your patience for the slower updates, I'm just being too busy at the moment... But I'd rather take my time editing the chapters to deliver something decent than slack on it by posting their first drafts with missing words, mistakes and whatever.