(Liam's POV - Sun. 4 October 2013)
On Sunday morning - or afternoon, the first word that comes to my mind when I resurface from my near-coma is: RESTROOM!!!!
I don't know how I manage, but I make it just in time to the toilets before everything that was in my stomach lurches out in noisy and painful retching. I am kneeling in front of the pan, my hands resting on each side and I feel like this is never going to stop. My chest keeps heaving and tears of pain are falling down my cheeks. I think my head is about to explode from a migraine like I never had before. I feel like I am suffocating and it is getting hard to breathe.
"Just let it go, Li..." Shan says softly behind me, his hands running all over my back in a soothing way.
After a couple more minutes, I think my stomach is finally empty and I slowly calm down. Shan hands me a glass of cold water that I use to rinse my mouth, and helps me up on my wobbling knees after he has flushed the toilets, before he leads me to the bathroom. He seats me down on the edge of the bathtub and prepares my toothbrush with toothpaste, for which I am grateful as soon as the mint clears the other disgusting taste of alcohol and acid.
This was my first booze, and believe me, it will be the last! Once I have rinsed my mouth, Shannon leads me on my shaky legs to the living room where I plop down on the couch. There, he covers me with a blanket before he heads back to the kitchen. He comes back a few seconds later with a glass filled with orange juice and some pills.
"Here... take that and you'll soon feel better," he whispers softly. I gladly take the painkillers and chug down them with the cold orange juice. My stomach grumbles and I only hope I am not going to throw up again.
"Thanks..." I mumble, my voice hoarse from vomiting.
I close my eyes and doze off for a moment, waiting for the pills to do their job. When I open my eyes again, Shan is walking back from the kitchen with two plates of noodles - not burnt or overcooked this time - and I happily accept one as I am feeling terribly hungry now.
"What time is it?" I ask while I start picking in my plate.
"Four in the afternoon... Are you going to tell me what exactly happened this time?" he asks worryingly.
"What do you mean with this time?" I reply causing him to frown. I don't remember him asking me anything yet!
"You only uttered incoherent words last night when you came back home. I didn't understand anything you said! Do you at least remember what happened?"
Oh my God! I can't believe I haven't even thought about why I was in this state since I woke up earlier! Despite a few gaps, I immediately recover my memory. The nightclub, the drinks, the flirt, the guy I met - what was his name again? Holy crap! We made out on the couch and then... Ugh!!! The shame!! The awful shame at being caught by those security guys! I feel myself blush to a deep red.
"I... I... Were you home when I got back?? I remember looking for you at the club and couldn't find you before I was thrown out of the club and into a taxi..."
"Yes, I was home! I saw you looked quite busy with that guy near the bar when I went to the restrooms, but when I got out, you were no longer there. I looked for you for a while, but I couldn't see you, so I thought you went back home. Since I was having a headache, I left too and had only just arrived when you came back and... Wait! What did you say? Did you get thrown out the club!!?" he suddenly shouts, reviving my headache.
"Shan, please!!! Don't scream..." I complain.
"What happened Li? Why did you get expelled?"
"Hmm... That guy I was with... and I... we... we were doing things... and it is apparently forbidden. I vaguely remember security guys came and took us to some sort of office with plenty of screens. They told off the other guy for making me drink alcohol when I am underage. I think they also said we couldn't make out in public in this club. At least not at the lounge area. I don't know why, but they kept me a bit longer and they lectured me on the risks of accepting drinks from strangers... drugs and so on..." I pause for a few seconds. "Oh God Shan... how could I be so stupid?" I whine. "Imagine if the drink had been spiked!!"
"I can't say it was very clever indeed, but I've done it before. Although... I usually make sure to be at the bar when I accept a drink so that I can see it comes straight from the bartender. I'm sorry Liam, I should have warned you," he says scornfully.
"Don't feel guilty, it's not your fault. I'm supposed to be an adult and I should have known better. And above all, I should have stopped drinking much earlier. I'm not used to drinking so much; that was stupid."
"At least it'll have taught you a lesson," he says with a small smile. "My Bunny got his first booze!!!" he then chants.
"Yep, definitely. I've never felt so much shame in my life. These two men, they treated me like a little kid and..." I trail off. Damn! Could I admit I liked it? Oh Gosh... my brain must have been damaged by the alcohol!
"And...?"
"And nothing... I just felt really shameful. I think I'm never gonna go back to this club in a long time. I wouldn't like to cross their path again," I just say, making him laugh.
"There are like 5000 people going to this club on Saturday nights, Liam! They wouldn't recognize you!"
"I would... and that would be enough to make me feel shameful again!" I say, emptying my plate of noodles. There's a sudden new brightness in Shan's eyes as he finishes his own plate.
"So you're definitely gay, Bunny..." I almost choke on the spoonful of food I just took, causing me to cough a little and Shannon to laugh out loud. "And don't go denying it anymore!!"
"Ugh shut up!" I groan.
"No way! My little bro is getting big finally... how was it by the way?"
"Argh Shan... please..."
"Please tell me..." he begs, dropping his plate and spoon on the floor and kneeling on the couch as his hands rest on my folded knees. "Did you two have time to... you know..." he says, wriggling his eyebrows.
"Don't be silly, Shan! A couch in a nightclub is not exactly the dream place for a first time," I reply bitterly. He seems to think it over for a second.
"Yeah, probably... These things need to happen slowly and after a good shower... if you see what I mean."
"Huh... no I don't see what you mean... and I'm not sure I want to know just yet, you see!"
"Come on, Liam! You don't see what I mean? I can only imagine you as a bottom, Bunny, and unless you want your partner's cock covered in sh..."
"Stoooooooooooooop!! Just shut up!!! My stomach is not comfortable enough yet to think about that... please Shan... stop..."
"Okay fine... but you still see my point..."
"I said shut up!" I shout, pulling the blanket away and getting up. I pick up our plates and head to the kitchen, hearing him chuckle.
We spend the rest of the day watching replays of animes and enjoying our last few hours together before he drives out of Chicago on Monday morning. When I finally lie down in bed that evening, my thoughts go back to what happened in the last 48 hours.
I kissed my boss and ditched him in the lift when he had invited me for a dinner. I went to a club where I drank too much and made out with a stranger. And finally, I eventually found out about my sexual preferences. I don't know which bothers me the most, though certainly not the last one.
I am actually relieved I found out I am gay. I can't really say I truly enjoyed what I did with the stranger, but I can't deny I didn't hate it either. After all, I did get an erection when he groped me, though... Oh no! Why does it have to hit me when I am just about to fall asleep? I know why I got aroused by the stranger! It was only because he reminded me of the one man I will have to face tomorrow morning!
It is needless to say I have a very bad night and when I wake up on Monday morning, I am not too sure about what I should expect from this coming week; certainly not much pleasure.
Shan and I hug for a long time before I leave for work and we promise to call each other often enough. The closer I get to the office, the more I feel the tension increase in my body. The last time I saw Mr. Pierce was the most awkward and uneasy situation I had been in - even worse than the lecture I got from the two men at the club all things considered - and I wonder how things are going to be between us.
Will he want to discuss it? Is he mad at me? I just hope he had an extremely pleasant weekend and that he will have forgotten about the incident. On the train, I decide to check my emails on my phone but realize that the battery is dead and that I left the charger at home. Damn!
It is barely eight in the morning when I reach my desk and I feel somewhat relieved when I realize that Mr. Pierce isn't in yet. The window wall is still unfrozen from last Friday and all the lights are out. I quickly log into my laptop and make some coffee before I check his calendar in Outlook.
I'm glad to see I still have access, which means I am not fired yet. I was expecting some emails from him over the weekend since he said he would work on the file I prepared for him on Friday afternoon, but there is none so I set myself to the reporting files I need to update.
About half an hour later, the doors of the private lift slide open, causing my heart to thump in my chest, and a fuming Mr. Pierce barges out and goes straight to his office.
"Morning Liam," he grumbles. "Please make sure I don't get disturbed today."
"Good morning, Mr. Pierce..." I don't think he hears me because the door slams shut before I have time to finish my greeting. The windows suddenly frost and I barely have time to see him wince when he pulls his laptop bag off his shoulder.
Well, so much for the pleasant weekend I hoped he had... It sounds like a great week coming.
That leaves me wordless and quite confused. I guess he hasn't forgotten about my stupid move from Friday evening but what can I do? Should I go and apologize? Should I bring him his coffee, hoping it will brighten his mood? But then I remember he said he doesn't want to be disturbed and that he was carrying a Starbucks cup of coffee in his other hand, so I take it as a hint he doesn't want my coffee. A little ping echoes on my laptop a few minutes later and I click on the little highlighted pop-up window.
Please order me a sandwich and fruit today. Thanks.
It seems like this is going to be our communication means today, so I call the receptionist to pass his order and I quickly reply to his note in a similar tone.
It's done, Sir.
The rest of the day goes uneventful in the sense that I don't see him once. After I got his lunch from the first floor and put it in the fridge, I go back down to the canteen for my own lunch, and when I return and go get my coffee in the meeting room, I notice that his sandwich and apple have disappeared from the fridge.
Thank God, nobody comes to see him today and I can only assume that his Do not disturb status on Lync must have refrained anyone from coming. In the late afternoon, I receive an email from him with the file I worked on. The email just says please have it ready by tomorrow evening.
I open the pdf and see that it is a scan of the print-out copy I had given him on Friday with tons of handwritten notes. I frown but force myself not to look up and stare through the frozen window. I print the pdf and start to have a look at all the notes, trying to decipher his obviously strained and infuriated writing whereas it is usually nice and clear.
At half past five, I see him walk out of his office and lock the door and he groans a barely audible goodbye once he is in front of the lift. True to my polite self, I wish him a good evening too and soon follow suit.
I have had my share for today, so I switch off my laptop and leave it on my desk, but take his notes before I leave. With a heavy heart, I head back home, dreading the lonely evening I am about to spend. Rather than dwelling on this sad day, I endeavor to decipher Mr. Pierce's notes so that I don't fall behind tomorrow. By midnight, I have deciphered about three quarters of the document and that's before I fall asleep on the couch.
The following morning, I wake up with a start. I didn't hear my phone go off, but then I remember the battery was dead and I didn't charge it yesterday evening. I run to the kitchen and see that it's only 6:17 am, which isn't that bad, it could have been much worse. I quickly fish my phone from my bag and put it in charge while I go shower. Once I am ready, I quickly grab a cereal bar that I shove in my bag, pick up my phone and the charger and head out to take my train.
The weather is dry but rather cold and I thank myself for having chosen my most recent suit when I dressed up since it is warmer than the other ones. I really need to go shopping and buy an overcoat, though. Despite the cold, I take my time to reach the train station. I must admit I am reluctantly going to work today.
Mr. Pierce's attitude yesterday didn't set me very well and I am scared about how it is going to be today. Even if I am shy and anything but easy-going, I have a hard time with people ignoring me or sulking; I hate being in conflict. I wish I had Shan at home with me last night. I probably wouldn't have told him about the situation, but I know his sole presence would have cheered me up.
As the train moves off, I grab my iPhone 4S to unlock it and put in the pin code. Thinking about Shan makes me think he might have tried to contact me. There are indeed a few texts from him, the last one dating from this morning and it says I'd better give him a quick call because he is worried I didn't answer yesterday.
With a smile, I open the phone app and frown at what I see. More precisely, I frown at the name sitting on top of the list of calls I passed.
No... this can't be possible... I haven't called Mr. Pierce in a long time with this phone. The last person I called was Shannon, not my boss! My heart bolts in my chest when I look at the date and time this call occurred. Sunday 01:07... Oh my god! No! There must be a mistake! I hope he didn't answer the call at that moment. That's when I was with... damn I don't even remember his name!
Now I clearly remember how I had been fumbling with my phone just before the guy joined me on the couch, looking at my boss's contact card. But I'm pretty sure I had locked my phone before I tossed it back in my chest pocket... or maybe I didn't. I don't know anymore. But if he picked up the call, would he have been able to hear what we said? Seeing that I had shoved the phone in my chest pocket rather than in my jeans, I can only assume he would.
But then, if he did pick up and realized I wasn't answering, he would have hung up, right? Is that why he was upset yesterday? Was it because I called him late on a Saturday night? I quickly look into the details of the call and to my utter dismay, I see that the call lasted for more than five minutes!
So he either heard live what was happening, or he got it into his voice mail. Either way, this is all fucked up. But at least his bad mood from yesterday makes sense now. I can only imagine how I would feel if I were an important business man and I received a call from my assistant late at night to only hear this person make out with another person. Even worse after said assistant had kissed me back only a day before.
I try to remember what was said during these few minutes but give up after I realize that it was... rather hot. And I thought last Friday evening's events were embarrassing! I believed that the lecture I got from the two security guys at the club was embarrassing. All this was bullshit compared to this.
When the train stops in Clinton station, I am tempted to wait for the train that would bring me back home, but I think I have messed up more than enough. I really need to face my responsibilities. I am almost 21 and should behave like an adult, although the last three days have proved differently.
Therefore, I determinedly walk toward the Pierce Building, climb the few steps that lead to the large entrance doors, nod at the security guy and head for the lift. When the doors slide open on the 21st floor, it takes all my courage not to press the ground floor button, but I still find it in me to step out and walk to my desk as discreetly as possible. The windows are still frosted and the door is closed but I can smell his strong cologne; I guess he didn't arrive long ago.
After I have logged into the system and prepared some coffee, I am glad to see I haven't received any note from Mr. Pierce. I know he can see me and he should know I have arrived. I decide to ignore all the stress that has filled me since my earlier realization, and to be on my best professional behavior. Maybe if I work a lot and do my best to please him, he will forgive me? So I go back to the meeting room and pour his coffee and milk in a mug before I go and hesitantly knock on his door, trying not to spill the mug while I hold my notepad in the same hand.
"Come in." His tone is dark and deep. God help me please...
"Good morning, Sir..."
What I wanted to sound clear and loud only turns out as a ridiculous squeak. His expression is severe, his normally plump lips forming a thin line. This is when I realize that he has his headphones on and I vaguely decipher some voices coming from the headset. When he finally nods his head at me, I walk further in, eyes cast down, and put the mug on his desk before I hurriedly get out and quietly shut the door. A few minutes later, I get some Lync notes from him to order his salad and yogurt, and to remind me that he needs the file ready tonight. With a sigh, I set to work.
The day flies by, and like yesterday, I don't see him again. He didn't ask me to prevent anyone from disturbing him though, so when Derek Jones comes for his appointment with Mr. Pierce, I just let him go in, same with Megan from Legal, and with Allan a bit later.
Determined to at least fulfill my duties, I focus on my major task of the day and even skip lunch, which earns me a scolding from Elena when I decline her offer to go out for lunch. It is way past six when I finally review the whole document. I am pretty proud of the result, but deep down, I can't help the sadness I feel after these two days he has been ignoring me. I won't be able to deal with this situation much longer; I need to find a way to solve this problem.
If he heard what happened at the club, how come he hasn't asked me any questions yet? Is he waiting for me to come and apologize? Is that what it is? My own guilt has long taken over the anger I felt against him on Saturday morning, and I guess an apology is the minimum I owe him.
I startle as the door of his office suddenly opens and laughter echoes to my ears. This is only Allan getting out and they are apparently joking about fucking wooden walls. I don't really understand what can be so funny, but I still smile shyly at Allan after he has shut Mr. Pierce's office door and wished me a good evening.
This has to stop. Whatever the consequences are, I need to sort this situation with Mr. Pierce, so I eventually gather some courage - and the printed copy of the documents - and go knock on his door.
"Come in!"
His tone is bit cheerier than this morning and I take it as a good sign. As I open the door, my only hope is that he is in a better mood.
"The document is ready, Sir..." I say in a small voice.
"Thanks Liam," he says as I neatly drop the stack of papers on his desk. I keep my eyes cast down, not knowing how to bring this up. I am so scared about his reaction.
"Is there anything else you would like to add, Liam?" he asks after a good thirty seconds of silence. My eyebrows frown a little at the slight mockery in his tone but my eyes prickle with tears that I well intend to hold back.
"I... I... I..." What am I supposed to say? I should have prepared my apology.
"You?" he gently encourages me to my surprise. Even if my eyes remain locked on his desk, I can see him lean forward and rest his forearms on the table.
"I'm sorry, Sir..." I whisper. "I wanted to apologize..."
"For what Liam?"
There is no surprise or astonishment in his voice. His tone has lost all signs of irony and sarcasm, but I'm sure he knows what I am speaking about and that he has been expecting this moment. I tentatively peek at him and only see kind emotions on his face though. Gentleness, relief, but also a little of sadness as well as huge expectations and authority.
"I'm sorry I ran away like I did on Friday evening," I eventually say, trying to keep my gaze on him. "And I'm sorry for the call you must have received from me on Saturday night. I am terribly sorry for this, Sir. I sincerely apologize."
He slowly reclines into his armchair, his expression all serious again, then he folds his arms across his chest - his muscular chest - and sighs.
"If I could, I would have probably disciplined you with corner time and a firm spanking, but I obviously couldn't," he says sternly after a long minute of silence. His tone is much stricter now and this is what first gains my attention, much more than what his words mean. "The only thing I could do to punish you was to ignore you."
As his two sentences slowly sink into my head, I observe several reactions.
The first is incomprehension: what were his words again? Discipline? Spanking? Punish? What the hell is he talking about?
The second one is far more confusing. My body seems to process the meaning of his words much faster than my stupid brain, and honestly, right now, I would really like someone to explain me why the fuck my penis is swelling in my pants!!
Published on 11 Sept 2016
This is almost the end of the first part of the story! The next chapters are the beginning of the second part which corresponds to Liam discovering Joshua's lifestyle and losing his innocence. Smut is coming soon XD