British Bird
Chapter Six
Sang
Victor just sits beside me the whole way to the stop I need to get off at. I'm hyper aware of every movement and a few times I found myself watching him from the corner of my eye. At one point I saw him texting on the latest iPhone. Typical. Always up to date with technology and here I am with some old fashioned LG that I got at a good deal on from a second hand phone store.
When the bus comes to a halt at my stop, I stand and Victor follows suit, letting me free. He doesn't say anything, not like I'd be able to hear him anyway. I still have the music blasting in my ears. I may be acting childishly right now, but I'm hurt and angry; anger an emotion I'm not very familiar with.
I feel him follow me down the stairs on the bus and towards the doors. Before I get off, I spin around and pull the headphones off. "Don't follow me."
His eyes, I could get lost in those eyes forever. "I'm sorry, Sang." I'm not sure what's he apologising for but when I get off the bus he follows me. I knew that telling him not to follow me would just go in one ear and out the other. I guess that's what his apology was about.
He doesn't say anything, just walks at my side. But I want him to talk. I want to hear the sound of his voice, I want him to tell me that's he's still playing the piano. But then I don't want to hear how his life has been without me in it. I'm so confused. I have no idea what to feel right now.
Rounding the corner to my apartment flat building, I immediately spy the black Audi and grey Land Rover. No need to guess who it is. The doors to the vehicles open and my pace quickens. My hand goes into my bag for my keys. They can't get into the building once I let myself in the main front door. My hands shake, the keys rattling in my grip.
"Sang, please stop running," Sean calls to my back.
I stop at the front door, my key hovering near the lock. I put it in and turn around. They're here, all of them. Nathan looks bigger than ever, while Luke looks more like a Calvin Klein model. Gabriel looks like he's going to burst into tears, while the others silently plead for me not to run.
"You know," I mutter, shuffling on my feet. "I don't know whether to love the fact you're here or hate you for taking so long."
"Let us come in and explain please, Sang," Luke says and I realise then how much I've missed him, them. Luke was my first friend out of all them. I met him first. Doesn't mean I care for him more, because I don't. I've always cared for them equally and my own special way with each of them.
I'm about to cave but I can't, not yet. I need to get my thoughts together. I just need to be alone. "I need to know one thing right now," I whisper.
"If we can tell you, we will," Mr Blackbourne finally speaks. It's the first time I've heard his voice since I was thirteen and nothing about it has truly changed.
"Cara...is she...alive?" I've never allowed my thoughts to take me anywhere beyond her smiling face whenever I think about her.
"She is," Sean answers, his lips curling into a smile. "She's very much alive and in America with Johnny and Uncle, as healthy as ever."
That's all I need to know. Relief flood through me and I say nothing more as I quickly turn around and open the door. I pull my keys out as shouts start behind me. I turn around and shut the door. Gabriel bashes into it a second later, banging his hands on the glass panel. "Open this fucking door, Trouble. I mean it. Fucking open the door."
With a heavy heart, I turn around and run up the stairs. When I reach my door, I open it and go inside, taking a few deep breaths as I close the door behind me. I take off my jacket, kick off my shoes and throw my bag wherever. I need a cup of tea.
Going into the kitchen, I flick the kettle on and get a cup. Waiting for the kettle to boil, I finally let myself process what's happened. They're here, in the flesh. But why? Are they here for me and only me? Or something else? The anger burns low in my stomach and my hand clenches tightly around my cup. I spin around and with a cry that turned into a frustrated scream, I throw the cup at the wall, shattering it into pieces.
Just like how my heart has been for so long.
I drop to the floor, pull my knees up to my chest and I finally cry. I cry for the boys, I cry with relief about Cara and I cry for a women that doesn't deserve my tears, my mother. And I cry for me; I cry because I'm tired and because I'm lonely. I cry because I need to just let it all out.
Flashback – Thirteen Years Old
The next morning, I wake up to the sound of shuffling. Blinking my eyes open, I sit up on my elbows and squint through the light that's on low. Looking beside me, I find Kota putting his glasses on. "What time is it?"
Kota looks over at me and gives me a smile. Now I know who held my hand last night. "It's still early, go back to sleep."
Looking around the room, I find that everyone is here but Silas and Nathan. North is dressed in a pair of black tracksuit bottoms and a black t-shirt. Victor is pulling on some trainers and is wearing something similar to North. "Why are you up so early?"
Kota gets to his feet. "Training," is all he says. I frown at his back as he collects a green bag and goes up the stairs.
"Training?" I repeat softly.
"Stop being so nosey," Gabriel says and I turn my head, looking over my shoulder. He sits at the bed above my head. Gabriel had been the one playing with my hair and massaging my head. "It's just this thing we do," he says.
"Everyday?" I ask.
"Yes," he grins. "Go back to sleep. You'll fucking regret it if you don't."
Seeing someone move from the corner of my eyes, I turn that way. North puts his foot on someone's back. "Get the hell up, Luke."
"Tired," Luke whines. "Five more minutes."
"No. Get up. You need to burn off that chocolate cake." A small giggle escapes me and North looks in my direction. "Good morning."
"Morning," I whisper softly. He smiles and my heart does a funny flip in my chest. I flop back onto my pillow, rolling onto my side and pull the blanket up and over my head. "I'm going back to sleep."
"Good. You look like you could do with more," Victor says. "Probably a bit of jet lag."
"I have jet lag," Luke cries.
"You do not, Mr Taylor. Get up and change. Now." The demanding tone in his voice causes a shiver to go down my spine.
I close my eyes as I hear them getting ready; footsteps up and down the stairs, the shuffling of the sleeping bags as they walk over them. I must have dosed back off, because when I next open my eyes the room is empty but the light is still on low. Still wanting more sleep, I drift off.
The next thing I know a hand is on my shoulder. "Sang honey, time to wake up," Cara says softly.
I blink my eyes open and look at her. "What's the time?"
"Just gone ten AM, honey." She tilts her head to the side, "How did you end up down here?"
"I needed a drink..." I continue to tell her what happened; how I managed to find my way in the dark. Then I tell her about Mr Blackbourne sneaking up on me and scaring me. She smiles at that part. I don't however tell her what I shared with him. It was hard on Cara when she first learned about what I had seen and heard over the years. I didn't want to see that pain in her eyes again.
"Owen is a good kid," She says with a smile.
I scoff, "He's sixteen and acts twenty six. Don't let him hear you say that."
She laughs as I sit myself up, the blanket pooling in my lap. "I won't." Her eyes gaze back at mine, something shining in their depths. "They're all good guys, Sang. I know what happened yesterday upset you, but know that they care deeply. It's the way they are."
I nod my head. Then I remember what I woke up to this morning. "What training was it they were doing this morning?"
"Um..." She stutters, "Give them time. See if they tell you themselves and if they don't, then I'll explain. But honey, just remember they're not a normal group of friends, okay?" I'm not sure what she means, but nod my head anyway. "Now, come on. James saved you some breakfast."
"What are we doing today?" I ask, getting to my feet. I pull a hair bobble off my wrist and pull my tangled hair up into a ponytail.
"Not much at all. I believe Johnny and James are going to play golf, so it'll be just us girls."
"Where are the guys?" I follow her up the stairs. When we reach the hall, we head for the kitchen.
She hesitates in answering me. "They had to go and do a few things. They waited to see if you'd wake up but when it became obvious that you weren't waking up soon, they left." Going into the kitchen, she goes to the kettle and starts making me a cup of tea while I push myself up onto a stool.
I watch as she makes me a cup of tea and does a plate of bacon and toast that was kept in the grill of the cooker to keep warm. She sets them down in front of me. I start eating in silence, feeling the disappointment of not seeing the guys today. I quietly sigh, I'm already clinging to them like a monkey. Well, probably not as much as that, but I just want to be around them.
I'm just nibbling on some bacon when Cara puts a phone and a slip of paper with a series of numbers on it in front of me. "What's this?" I ask, dropping the bacon onto my plate and wiping my greasy hands on a kitchen towel. I pick up the paper and notice the guys names next to the numbers.
"That would be a phone provided by Owen and numbers that belong to each of the boys. So you can text them throughout the day."
I pick up the phone. I've never had a phone before. Blackberry is written at the top of the phone and the buttons are like a keyboard. Just so much smaller though. "So it's for me?"
"It is," Cara confirms and a blossom of excitement travels through me. I press the square button and it comes up with the time, a picture of the beach and an envelope item blinking the number three at me in a red bubble. "Would you like me to show you how to use it?"
I nod my head because it would be easier for someone to show me then to teach myself. A few times we get stuck but we get there and within an hour I can use the phone. And even play a game that Cara managed to download.
"Now, I'm pretty sure you have messages," Cara says, pointing at the envelope and the red circle. I navigate the phone and go into the messages. It comes with the names of who sent them. If we hadn't added the numbers the boys left, then it probably would have had just the number.
I click on the first one that has Gabriel's name.
Gabriel: Can I take you shopping on Friday? And Cara too. The top she's wearing today is as hideous as the one she was wearing yesterday!
I find myself smiling. Looking to Cara, I giggle when I find her pouting. "Can we go?" I ask.
Cara nods, "Yes as long as he stops complaining about my clothes."
I grin and use the buttons to reply.
Sang: Cara said yes. I would love to go shopping with you, Gabriel. Thank you.
I go to the next message that's marked with Nathan's name.
Nathan: Come to my house on Saturday. I have a swimming pool. We can have a mini pool party.
Sang: I'd love too!
I send my reply and look to the next one. Seeing Mr Blackbourne's name, I click on it.
Mr Blackbourne: Good Morning, Sang. I do hope you slept well. This phone is for you and I hope you make good use of it. Everyone already has the number and I left our's for you to add to your contact list. I wish you a lovely day.
I go to write out a reply, but I'm not sure what to say. Thank you just seems...plain. And too simple. Before I can think of something Cara says, "Why don't you go and get dressed, Sang? We'll go for a walk into the small town centre, grab some food, and do a little sight seeing."
I nod my head and jump down from the stool, quickly drinking the last of my tea. Going upstairs, I go into my room and close the door. Putting the phone on the bedside table, I change out of my pajamas and into a pair of white shorts and light pink tank top. I slip my feet into my sandals and brush my hair, leaving it to hang over my shoulders.
Sitting on the bed, I pick up the phone and bring up Mr Blackbourne's message. Gah, I hate calling him that. I hate calling someone I want to consider a friend by their last name, like a teacher. I finally type out a reply.
Sang: Thank you for the phone. It's very kind of you. I do hope training, whatever that is, went well and I hope to see you again soon. Have a lovely day, Owen.
I press send and lock the phone, putting it in the pocket of my shorts. Going downstairs, I find Cara with her sunglasses on and her bag hanging over her shoulder. "Ready?"
"Ready."
xXx
My day is amazing. It's not the first time I've hung out with Cara like today, but today has been the best. We did a lot of window shopping, walking by different shops and boutiques. We did buy a few things; me some new books and Cara got herself some new bangles that she likes to collect. We went for lunch at a little café where we talked about random things while laughing and smiling.
I like Cara. I like her a lot. Johnny too. They have defiantly been the best thing to happen to me in my whole life. They make me happy and already I'm dreading the day I get taken away from them, because it will happen, no matter how much I hope for it to not.
When we return to Uncle's house, two cars that I recognise are in the driveway. Cara nudges my shoulder. "Looks like they can't stay away." I blush, ducking my head as Cara lets out a small laugh.
I've had a few texts from each of the guys throughout the day, but not many. Just simple ones asking how I am, what am I up to, blah blah blah. But it was nice and for once, I felt like a normal thirteen year old; like the girls back at home.
Cara opens the front door and I follow her inside. Silence greets us. "Hello?" Cara calls.
No answer. "Where is everyone?"
"I don't know," Cara whispers. "But this feels a bit like deja vu."
"What do you mean?" I look around the quiet house, listening for any sounds but hear none.
"James and Luke are huge pranksters. They pull pranks on anyone. I think I made a mistake by texting Johnny and telling him we were on our way back."
"Cara?"
"Yeah?"
"What's about to happen?"
"I don't know."
A nervous laugh leaves me. Cara puts her bags on the floor and I do the same, knowing I'm going to follow her and be caught up in whatever is about to happen. I even take the phone out of my pocket and put it in Cara's handbag.
We check out the living room first. It's empty and nothing seems suspicious. Going into the kitchen, the back patio doors are wide open. Cara freezes, which in turn, causes me to freeze. A moment later, we were walking towards the doors. Before stepping out of the patio, I reach for her hand on and hold it tight. I'm not going to lie, I'm a little nervous.
Stepping out onto the patio, we look around the back garden. Trees are along the back and sides and the grass has recently been trimmed, but nothing seems out of place.
"Okay, maybe not deja vu." Cara says, her eyes like mine are scanning the yard but this is the first time I've really seen it so nothing looks to out of place. Cara freezes. I tense. "Sang?"
"Yeah?"
Before she can reply, a creak comes from behind us. I turn around and step back when I see Uncle and Luke carrying a black bucket each. Grins are over their faces and Johnny stands a few feet behind them, his shoulders shaking with silent laughter. "Cara," I whisper, like Uncle and Luke can't hear me.
She spins around. "Oh no," She mutters. "This can't be good."
"Cara, you remember when you visited at Christmas and you did our washing for like three days before you left?" Uncle grins and I peek up at Cara; her face pales.
Uncle laughs at her face, Luke right along with him. Johnny even lets out a loud bellow of laughter. "No idea what you're talking about."
"I think we need to remind her, Uncle," Luke says.
"I agree." They take a few steps forward and we take the same back. I look behind me. We still have more slab patio left before the grass. "I was itching for days."
"For days!" Luke echoes.
"And I couldn't figure out why. That was until I rang Johnny. He informed me that you put Poison Ivy in with our washing in the dryer."
"Oh, Cara," I whisper. "Why did you do that?"
"Pay back,." is all she mutters.
"Now it's pay back time," Uncle finishes.
"I don't want to be in the middle of this," I cry. I don't want whatever is in that bucket all over me.
"Ah you see, cupcake. This is also our way of bringing new members into our family." Luke's grin can't possibly get any wider. "Johnny went through it five years ago."
"True story," Johnny confirms.
"What's in the bucket?" I ask.
"You'll see," Uncle replies. "Ready Luke?"
"Yup." I hate how he pops the 'p'.
They move forward. I turn to run and end up tripping over my own two feet, face planting the floor. I grunt and go to get up but as I do, fast footsteps come up behind me. I instinctively know what what's coming. My hands fold over my head and I close my eyes, pressing my lips together as Cara screams.
Thick, gooey stuff lands on my head and I let out a screech. It's cold and slimy, making my skin crawl and a shiver to go down my spine as laughter rings in my ears.
I move my arms, quickly pushing whatever the goo is through my hair so it doesn't fall on my face. The moment I open my eyes I'm greeted with another bucket filled with a white powder, Sean holding it with a wide smile. "Good afternoon, Miss Sang."
Then the powder is all over me. My mouth opens and I get some in my mouth, causing me to cough. It sticks to my skin, my clothes and my hair.
"Oh my god, I'm so fucking glad I got this all on camera," Gabriel laughs.
I wipe at my eyes and slowly blink them open. I can feel clumps of powder in my eye lashes. I slowly stand, slime going down the back of my tank top. "Great," I mutter. "Now I need a shower." I was going to have one tonight anyway, but makes it so that I need one right now.
"Don't worry. We're already on it," Nathan shouts and a beat later cold water is getting sprayed all over me. I turn my back to the water, letting out a scream. It's ice cold, but it's cooling down my warm skin.
I open my eyes and they land on Victor and Kota who stand at the sidelines laughing their heads off. I head in their direction. They notice and their laughter stops. They turn to run, but I'm quicker. I jump up and onto Kota's back getting the powder, slime and water over us both.
I laugh and I smile.
I experience my highest high.
End Of Flashback
I don't know how long I cry for before eventually the sobbing stops and my eyes are gritty and dry. I know I need to talk to them and I will, but it will be when I'm ready. I think about calling Evie, after all she is my one true friend right now, but not even she knows about the guys.
They've always been my secret, something I've always kept close to me and never shared with anyone, including Michelle.
Getting up, I make my way into the living room and look out the window that gives me a view out of the front of the building. Only the Audi is there now, but I can't see who is inside with the dark tinted windows. It looks highly suspicious outside a run down building like this one.
Turning around, I sit down on the sofa. I feel completely exhausted now, after all the crying and what's gone on today; first the news of my mother and then the guys appearing at work out of nowhere.
Laying down, I close my eyes. I know they won't give up until I listen. I just hope I don't give in so easily. I'm going to have to keep going on with my normal routine; go to work like I'm scheduled for tomorrow and then college on Monday.
I just wonder how far they'll go to get me to listen.