The Winston's Butler answered almost immediately when Daniel knocked on the front door.
He did not have to announce who he was, as they were expecting him, and he was already fifteen minutes late. So now the butler led Daniel directly to the drawing room, where Annette and John Winston were awaiting him.
"Good afternoon, I am sorry I am a little late" Daniel apologised as John Winston welcomed him by shaking his hand.
"It is fine," John brushed aside Daniel's late arrival, "It is just good to see you again, and know you are back safe and sound.. Would you like a drink?"
Daniel only too gladly accepted the offer, glancing around the room realising Clara was not there, he wasn't sure if he was relieved or disappointed.
Annette remained silent, she was a little shocked by her son-in-law's appearance. He had changed greatly since the last time she had set eyes on him five years ago. He was leaner, his face gaunt, the scar that left a gash on his right cheek did nothing to enhance his features, there was a hint of grey around the temples of his dark hair.
She recalled the handsome, pleasant young man he had been when her daughter had married him. It was hard to believe he was the same man. There was a bleakness about his blue eyes, and he seemed uneasy in their company. Annette was realising that war must do terrible things to men, although she wasn't sure that war was the only thing responsible
Recollecting herself she managed to smile and invite him to have a seat.
"Clara has been so excited when she heard you were coming," she smiled, "And I am sure you have been looking forward to seeing her again after such a long time.. She has fairly grown, and she is a very bright child"
"Yes, I am sure she is," Daniel forced himself to smile before taking the drink from John Winston's hand, and gladly taking a gulp
"Well I had better have Cassie fetch her down so you can see for yourself," Annette then said, rising from her chair to ring the bell, feeling a slight anxiety at the prospect of father and daughter meeting again. And hoping it would go alright.
When Cassie came to take her downstairs Clara jumped out of the chair where she had been impatiently waiting since she knew her father had finally arrived.
She was attired in a pretty yellow dress with matching bow in her dark hair, which contrasted nicely with her swarthy skin.
She was a mixture of nervous excitement, as Cassie led her out of her bedroom and down the stairs.
"What is he like Cassie?" she enquired in a hushed tone as they descended the stairs.
Cassie didn't know how to reply, like her employer Annette, she had found Daniel's appearance a little perturbing, but it was not her business to judge her betters.
"You will see for yourself, shortly enough," she finally replied diplomatically, but then because she was fond of Miss Clara, she squeezed the girl's hand reassuringly, "Just remember he has just come back from battling the frogs, and might seem a bit rough on it" she then added gently
Clara stared up at the maid with some uncertainty, wondering what she could mean. She soon discovered for herself when she was finally admitted into the drawing room.
When Cassie knocked on the door of the drawing room, then opened it to admit Clara, Daniel found he was sitting on the edge of his seat holding his breath. Because he was not sure what to expect. He could only picture his daughter when she was five years old. And even those memories were a little vague.
When the young girl stepped in along with the maid, he gave a sharp intake of breath as his eyes caught sight of her. Yes, she had his blue eyes, but everything else reminded him of her mother Isabella. Even the uncertain smile she sent in his direction. All he could do was stare at her as he felt something wrenching and twisting in his gut.
He managed to stand up as she approached him, She was now eyeing him a little warily. In her father's long absence, Clara had visualised him as a handsome daring war hero, who would swing her up in his arms as soon as she entered the room ,and hug her in delight.
But instead the reality stood before her in the shape of this foreboding stranger with a scarred face whose blue eyes were staring at her with little warmth, in fact the looked a little stricken at the sight of her
Pulling himself together, Daniel realised all eyes were on him and he should speak. He smiled somewhat awkwardly, "Hello Clara, Your Grandmother was right, you certainly have grown since I last saw you, what age are you now? Ten, if I am right?"
"Almost eleven," she replied, "My birthday is in a few months time"
"Of Course," Daniel nodded automatically, "I remember"
Silence ensued as Clara eyed her father up and down with a critical eye.
He seemed unable to think of anything to say, all he could see was his dead wife before him, and felt uncomfortable by her open scrutiny. Clara, with her ten year old astuteness, could tell he was not comfortable in her presence. This was not how she had imagined their reunion at all.
Annette decided to intervene to break up the uneasy silence, "Clara why don't you come sit next to me, and we will have tea brought up" she suggested before turning to Daniel, "I am sure you would like some refreshments after your long journey"
"Yes, I would like that very much," Daniel gave her a grateful smile, glad to turn his attention away from his daughter.
Clara obediently went over to sit with her grandmother, Now the shock of seeing her father had worn off, she was curious about him.
"How is your father keeping?" Annette then addressed Daniel, "We believe has not been suffering very good health lately"
"Yes" Daniel frowned a little, "The doctors say it is his heart, he is staying with his sister, my aunt Mary, at her house. She takes care of him"
"Does Grandpa Somerton remember me?" Clara spoke up, "We went to visit him once, he seemed very nice, but we couldn't stay long... he said he would like to come visit me, but because he is ill, he couldn't"
"Your Grandfather Somerton sends his warm regards, and he does remember you, in fact it was he who insisted I pay you a call" Daniel replied honestly with a tight smile
"But you were coming to see me anyway, weren't you?" Clara asked with a small worried frown that this was not the case
"Of- course," Daniel hurriedly put in, finding it difficult to look her in the eye. He was glad to see the servants come in with the tea and refreshments, to distract the attention away from himself
Although there were her favourite sandwiches and a cream cake cook had made especially for the occasion Clara found she had little appetite. Daniel was much the same, and he had to force the food down, even though he felt he was going to choke on it as he swallowed.
It was only John and Annette who managed to keep the conversation going, enquiring after Daniel's own health, asking him how his leg was doing. Asking him about what his plans for the future were concerning his father's Mill.
Clara had one burning question she needed to ask him. One she was hesitant to put to him, because his answer could change her life, but she could not stop herself in the end.
"Now you are back to stay, will I be coming back home to stay with you?"
Her outright question stunned Daniel.
It had not crossed his mind that he would have to take responsibility for Clara right now that he was home, on top of everything else, It was not something he had considered, or even wanted right now.
But he could hardly tell her that. His mind struggled for a suitable reply
"Well I don't know, I would not like to take you away from your Grandparents, you seem happy and well cared for, and I would not want to upset your routine... maybe sometime in the near future.. When I have settled and sorted matters out." he trailed off weakly.
"It is alright," Clara said, her eyes narrowing a little, "I would prefer staying with my grandparents for now" She then informed him a little haughtily. Daniel knew he should have felt relieved, that she was letting him off the hook, yet at the same time, he felt like his daughter had just primly snubbed him.
Disconcerted, he forced himself to smile, "Well I guess that is settled then.. It is much better you stay here for now" he agreed
He managed to sit for another hour, before making his excuses he had to go. In that time he and Clara shared little conversation, so when he announced he had to go, she just arched an eyebrow at him, "So soon?"
"Clara!" her grandmother Annette hurriedly reprimanded her granddaughter's insolent tone.
Clara turned wide innocent eyes on her Grandmother, looking contrite, "I just thought Papa would be staying a little longer, seeing he came all this distance to see me. I am sorry"
"I would like to stay longer, but unfortunately I can't" Daniel lied
"Yes Clara, you have to understand your father has a lot to sort out now he is back, I am sure he will visit you again soon" Annette told her with a small perplexed frown.
She knew her granddaughter well, and realised the young girl was not happy.
But there was little she could do, when Daniel behaved like a stranger to his own daughter. The atmosphere in the room had remained so strained, that Annette was almost relieved when Daniel announced he would have to go. She decided that perhaps he just needed more time to adjust to being around his daughter.. It would be hard for Clara to understand
"Yes Grandmamma," Clare replied meekly, before turning to her father, "I suppose I should kiss you goodbye? That's if you would like me to?'' She was eyeing him steadily again.
Daniel felt completely out of his depth, "Of course," he finally replied stiffly and remained in his seat, somewhat rigid, whilst she came over and kissed him lightly on the cheek,
"Goodbye Papa, it's been nice meeting you," Clara said politely.
He sensed she was uneasy with him, as he felt around her. It had been a disaster, and it was all his fault, but he could not help it.
Since Isabella's death, he had emotionally shut down around people, Then being in the army where discipline of emotions was called for, it had only hardened him further to human contact and empathy he had once had. Now it was difficult to bring them to the fore, especially when the reminder of his wife stood next to him.
"It's been nice meeting you again too," Daniel managed to reply. He suddenly couldn't escape quick enough.
He shook hands with John Winston, and allowed Annette to kiss his cheek in farewell; he could see the sympathy in her eyes but didn't feel he deserved it. So he hardly turned a backward glance in Clara's direction as he left the room, as guilt overwhelmed him.
A little while later, Clara watched from her upstairs window as her father rode away on his horse. He was unaware of her watching him as his horse cantered briskly down the driveway.
She felt strangely hollow after the encounter with her father, like all her feelings had been switched off. The happy reunion she had been so looking forward to, had not occurred.
Far from feeling that her father was glad to see her, it had felt quite the opposite, But she had to hide her disappointment and try to put on a brave face for Grandparents sake, she could not let them see how upset she was.
There had been no hugs and kisses, or learning of his adventures in the war. Instead he had remained cool and aloof, practically ignoring her. The hollowness in her chest was replaced with something that made it tighten and hurt.
And now she was alone, a sense of sadness engulfed her, the disappointment of the day washing over her in a huge wave .Although she tried hard, she could not stop the tears brimming up in her eyes and spilling down her cheeks, as she watched her father disappear into the distance.