A/n: Idk if anyone has noticed but from the beginning of the story up until now when the voices in Natsu's mind speak to him I refrain from using punctuation. When he replies to them that's when I use it. Sorry for not making that clear.
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"You lie to everyone around you, but you can't lie to the hole inside you."
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Normal point of view:
'Useless'
'Fuck up'
Natsu scrubbed harder on his skin as negativity swirled around in his head. Patches of his body began to redden at the harsh motion of the sponge. He added more pressure to it as they got louder.
'Gray must hate you now'
'Why would he love someone as horrible as you?'
'You'll never deserve his love'
"I want to get out of this body," Natsu declared under the showerhead while dropping the sponge. He stomped on the drain stopper and let the water fill the tub. He turned it off and slumped down having his head just above the water.
'He'll forget you and find someone better'
'Your nothing'
The voices consumed him and little by little his head sunk lower in the water.
'I hate you, stop talking to me.'
'We're your only company'
'Shut up!'
'Us and the drugs hold onto your sanity'
His nostrils burned and it became harder to breathe. He let the water reach his lungs as he closed his eyes.
With a loud splash, a wave of water spilled on the tiles.
Bubbles formed at the surface from the gurgling and lack of oxygen.
A knock resonated to the congested room and it fell on deaf ears. Natsu had forgotten to lock the door.
Probably from lack of sleep.
He couldn't bring himself to rest during the night. If he was fully awake when entering the bathroom, the door being locked would have been the first thing he did.
Sting.
He pulled his cousin out the water. Natsu leaned forward as violent coughs and gasps emerged from his throat. He had his pruned hands on his knees for support. He fought against the water blocking his airways when his coughs turned into full blown choking.
The blonde hesitated to pat Natsu's back because of all the scars that coated it.
'When someone is choking on any sort of liquid, do not pat them on the back. Leave them be and encourage them to breathe gradually. The pounding of the back will make the problem at hand worse. Make sure they are in the head-down face-down position, because it is essential. That way the substance can expel properly.' His old instructor's voice whispered in the back of his mind.
Instantly he was glad that he took that course with Rouge in grade 10.
He thought it was a waste of time.
It certainly wasn't, particularly for the use of today.
He told the boy his age to breathe slowly, to remember the difference between inhaling and exhaling.
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It had to be the bumblebee to find Natsu.
Really, though, the blonde was always in his dorm for Rogue he had forgotten that he actually lived across the hall.
What was he doing up so early? Or Maybe so much time passed since entering the bathroom it was almost time for him to be picked up by Zeref.
Sting had come to inform him...and got this.
He passed the pinkette a towel and said, "If I hadn't come in.." and began to pace.
"How many times will you try to take your own life before you actually succeed? Seriously Natsu, if I didn't freaking arrive minutes before you would have drowned!" He finished letting out a shaky breath. Natsu came up with the perfect lie or so he thought.
Being dishonest is his first language.
Though he might not be as fluent in it when Sting is around.
Natsu's point of view:
"It wasn't intentional, I didn't get much sleep last night."
It's true I couldn't.
Sting narrowed his eyes at me, suspicious of my excuse.
Those blue orbs are such a hazard.
Beware.
Someone should put a Skull and Crossbones sign up so I don't ever have to see them.
He doesn't say anything about my untruthful comment.
Funny.
I know he knows the truth and I know that he knows that I know.
Does that make sense?
Is that comprehensible, because even by how badly I worded that you get what I mean.
Sting isn't as oblivious as he makes himself to be.
I am aware of his intelligence that he carefully hides from people.
His eyes never leave mine and soon finds it's way to my body.
Where is the Skull and Crossbones symbol?
This is dangerous.
It's as if he is picking out everything that is wrong with me and is ready to report to his commander. In which, I have no idea of who that would be.
"Natsu. Have you been eating?"
Let me just hold in the sigh that was about to escape.
I should have seen this coming.
It's getting toxic.
I felt uncomfortable with his gaze and proceeded to walk out. He should have got the message from interacting with me during the months.
I know by now that by answering he'll maybe put two and two together.
Can't eat, can't sleep, ca-
"Your back," He stated barely audible. My already stiff muscles tensed up more than ever and I swiftly went to my room.
How could I have forgotten?
The sigh finally breaks free from my gritted teeth.
At least he isn't pushing it.
Hell yeah, he is with all the questioning.
Although he is smart, he usually doesn't access the full potential of his gift.
Such a menacing gift.
'Wait, answer me! Is it from when..ya know-?' I anticipated for Sting to say something similar to that after walking out on him.
He would paraphrase that sentence walking out of the bathroom as he demands a reply.
I guess my imagination was wrong and Sting somehow unlocked the rest of his unseen potential.
Definitely, he has learned to put himself in another person's shoes.
I well know if he was in my position he wouldn't have said anything either.
As if I will ever talk about the scars lingering on my back.
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I slipped into my jeans that barely hung to my hips and threw my baggy sweater over my head.
At the bottom of my feet, my blue cat clung to me and meowed. I picked him up and stared face to face with him.
Why did I name the cat Happy?
Such a foreign word to me. It seems to fit perfectly for the vibrant blue his fur gives off.
Soft and bright what an innocent little kitten.
Too bad he was abandoned by his previous owner.
Oh no, I gotta call the veterinarian my pet has abandonment issues.
Happy doesn't like being with other cats or people. He is afraid to be left alone again and decides that keeping a distance is safe.
I'm confused.
Am I talking about myself or making a diagnosis for Happy?
I don't know.
Possibly the furball is me if I became a cat.
Happy curls himself in my arms when I am done inspecting him.
I hear a knock from the tiny living room and know it's most likely for me, meaning I have to go.
"I'm sorry Happy," I tell him trying to put him down. His meows sound very sad.
So, so sad.
"I'll be back soon,"
Happy doesn't let go.
Since he has abandonment issues, of course, he wouldn't let me leave so easily. He cannot trust my statement and has the mindset that I am a liar and will not return.
And for once I stop speaking the art of dishonesty because I will eventually be released from the place of ill people.
I am sick, apparently.
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I snorted.
Mavis stood in the place of Zeref. He couldn't make it.
Of bloody course.
As fucking expected.
"Zeref had some things to work out and asked me to drop you off." The platinum blonde explained.
Never get your hopes up.
Expect nothing from everyone.
Avoid disappointment.
I feel disappointed.
No, I am not supposed to feel this.
It's not in the manner that I wanted him to take me to the hospital, anyone could have done it.
Anybody.
"What exactly did he have to do that he couldn't drop me off?" I asked curtly.
Fix my tone.
Don't reveal.
"I know you're mad that I'm here instead of your brother but you will not use that tone with me,"
She sounds like a teacher now. Oh wait, she is.
But I'm not angry.
I can't be.
I do not care that Zeref does not have the time for me.
I DO NOT CARE.
"He didn't give me the details.." She added not using her sharp voice anymore.
"Oh," I said blankly and her facial expression softened.
My hands that once held Happy minutes before, currently held my bag for my departure. I looked down at him as he clung to my leg again.
My luggage met the floor and I crouched down and cupped the kitten's face.
"I'll be back," I mouthed.
Don't need my art teacher thinking I'm crazy for talking to an animal.
I continued to look into the slits until I saw legs in front of me.
Black stockings, a uniform skirt I looked up and Wendy stood there. I got up from my spot and she pulled me towards her.
"I'll visit you,"
Yeah.
"Take care,"
Okay.
She locks her eyes on me and squeezes me tight. I hung my arms loosely around her.
It's all I can do.
"Say something please," She stressed.
What is there to say?
Thus, a thought comes to mind.
"Take care of Happy for me."
She let go of her hold and I smiled at her.
Just for you little sister.
I hope it doesn't appear to be strained.
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I think my writing skills have gotten a little bit better.