Chapter 8 – Frustrating
Lissa’s POV
I always knew those guys were horrible, but actually hearing the gossip wasn’t the best experience. Especially coming from Niall, after he lied to my face saying somewhat nice things I only wanted to throw up thinking of his name.
I walked back to the dorm room, I slammed the door shut and Isabel looked up at me, a text book in her lap. “What happened?” she asked, closing the book. “Niall Fucking Horan happened.” I groaned, falling flat onto my bed. “What did he do now?”
“Said shit about me and I heard.” I felt the bed sink as she laid down next to me. “He's a fucking asshole, and you know it, don’t let it get to you.” I was not going to cry over something so pathetic but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt. To hear people you know say shit about you like its nothing at all.
"Why even bother with him, you don’t need your grades up, let him fail." I sighed, “Extra credit.” Was all I had to say, “Screw it, you are topping that class and you know it.” I sighed again, “I just want to go die.”
“No, hey, don’t worry, he seems to think you are the hottest person alive right now.”
“But he doesn’t know its me, that’s the thing.”
We laid there talking for a while and ended up in laughing fits. But our laughter was stopped by a knock on the door.
“I got it.” Isabel said, getting off the bed and answering the door. “Fuck off, nobody wants to see you.”
“I want to talk to Lissa.” He used my nickname. I repeat, he used my mother fucking nickname! “Well, she doesn’t want to talk to you, you piece of shit.”
“I won’t leave til I speak to her.” He was looking past her and at me, I was looking at him. “Please?” he asked me this time, knowing, “Like she said, fuck off.”
“I’m not leaving.”
I sighed and rolled off the bed, getting up. “Fine. 2 minutes.” I stood next to Isabel, “What do you want?”
“Privacy?” he looked at Isabel, “She's not going anywhere.” I said, waiting for him to get on with his rant. “I’m not talking til she leaves. Or we can go, your choice.”
“Its dark out, no. And you wanted to talk, I'm fine if we don’t.” I was annoyed now, it was always his way or no way. Our stubbornness clashed.
“Please, I just need to talk.”
I sighed, “Fine. But seriously if you are only going to shit on about nothing I'm walking off.”
“Okay.” He said, I stepped out, looking at Isabel, she screwed up her face and shook her head at me, it was more of a joke but I also got the underlying meaning.
Once I closed the door he shoved his hands in his pockets and slouched, looking down at the ground.
“Can we walk?” I shrugged, “I guess, but I don’t want to go far, I don’t really want to talk to you.”
“I know. That’s why I want to talk to you.”
Well if it isn’t the biggest shock to the world, Niall Horan wanting to talk to me, oh wait, no, him actually admitting he's in the wrong? Dropping the cocky asshole persona just to apologise? I must be dreaming.
After we walked for a short while in silence together he built up the courage to speak. “What they were saying-” I cut him off, “No. Not they. You were saying it too.”
“Yeah, okay, whatever, what we said…”
“Get on with it Niall, I have shit to do.”
“I didn't mean it, I just had to go along with them. You know how it is.” I shook my head, “No, I don’t know how it is, I don’t know why you have to lie and be a total dog just so your friends don’t laugh? Unless you really are just not lying and as you said, are nice to my face so I can do the assignment for you, so you can get a blowjob.”
“I lied about that.”
“Don’t fucking bullshit me, I had never spoken to you regarding anything normal and unsexual until we were given this assignment. I get you need me to help and I'm willing to do that, but don’t just fucking dog me out. I get enough shit from other people as it is. I deal with my own shit you know? I’d like to just pass my classes in peace.”
He nodded along to what I was saying, “Yeah, I know.”
We walked in silence for a while longer, “Look, Niall, its getting cold out. Are you done?”
“No.” I sighed, and rubbed my arms, goose bumps were slightly showing, it didn't help that I was only wearing a pair of shorts and a t-shirt.
“Look. Uh. I don’t usually say this to anyone, especially girls. But I'm sorry.” Woah, hold the fuck up, shut the front door. Niall Horan just apologised to me, for being an asshole? Pinch me. How am I even supposed to know if he's just being nice to get in my good books and I do his work and give him blowjobs.
I didn't know what to believe anymore. But the mere shock of him uttering the words ‘sorry’ brought me to a standstill. He stopped and looked at me, “Are you okay?” he almost whispered. I didn't know what to say, “Are you going to accept my apology or did I just make a dick of myself for nothing?”
“I-I don’t know. Niall. How am I honestly meant to believe anything that comes out of your mouth… I just cant.”
He sighed, “I guess so... Are you cold or something?” I rolled my eyes, “Nah, I'm fucking sweating.” He cackled at me for a second, “Want to go back?”
I could not work out this boy, one minute he's serious the next he isn’t, the next he's kind, the next he's an asshole. Why was he so weird to me though, why didn't he just treat me like shit as expected. It makes it harder to do what I do.
I lost myself in the train of thoughts of my personalities and Niall's changing moods. I found myself snapping back into it when he put his hands on my shoulders, trying to read my face.
“What is it with you?” he asked, more to himself than to me. It seemed. “What?” I said, as a delayed reaction. “I swear you are different all the time, and you just look familiar.”
“Well, I do see you most days…” he let out a sigh, “But you look like someone else.” I shrugged, also realising his hands were still on my shoulders.
“That hickey…” he said, now looking at my neck. It was fading but he knew it was there so he could see it clearly.
“What about it?”
“Who gave it to you?” I shrugged, “Not sure, I went out, got a bit drunk, some random.” He shook his head. “No, it wasn’t, that’s not you.” I looked him in the eyes, “You don’t know me.”
He smiled now, a cheeky grin, “Oh, but I think I do. I think I have worked you out.”
I rose my eyebrows, “Have you now?” he only nodded.
I pushed his hands off me and started walking off in the direction we came from. He followed behind until he decided to pick up his pace and catch up.
“Wait.” He stepped in front of me, causing me to walk into him, “Wha-” he grabbed onto my arms, just below my shoulders, pulling me into him and pressing a kiss onto my lips. I tried to squirm out of his grip as soon as my brain registered, but he didn't pull back. It was kind of weird, because I was stood there in a kind of shock, trying to escape his grip.
His thumbs traced on my arms and I felt myself relax to his familiar touch. Before I knew it I was kissing him back, my hands slid hands around his waist. It felt so much better kissing him sober, I could taste the minty flavour of the gum he was chewing, and could take in his scent, making me want to collapse.
Wait. What.
I shoved him off of me. “WHAT THE FUCK?” I said, wiping the excess saliva off of my mouth, he looked at me, “Why the fuck did you do that?!”
“Showing you how sorry I felt.” I rolled my eyes, “Never. Ever do that again.”
“You kissed me back.” I started walking off. “Because I had no fucking choice, you didn't loosen your grip until I did.”
He laughed, “C’mon it was nothing, just a hook-up.”
I grunted, “Well, you are the one trying to hook up with a friend of mine, and then you go kissing me, I'm sure that’s going to go down well if she finds out.”
“Well she isn’t going to okay? Nobody is going to.” I laughed, “I guess we will have to wait and see for that one.”
I continued down the path until I reached the dorm room. I walked inside and closed the door. Isabel was looking at me, waiting to hear all the details.
“What happened?”
“Nothing, he was being a dick again, saying shit, trying to make me not hate his fucking guts, still ended up being a cocky prick. I don’t really want to talk about it. I’m going to shower.”
Niall's POV
What the fuck just happened?
What's gotten into me?
Have I turned into some weird ass softy who needs to apologise to bitches?
No.
I walked back to to frat house in a daze, walking inside I found a few of the lads sitting around watching TV, should be studying but getting real, nobody does that.
“Hey Niall! Want a beer?” I shook my head, but sat down on one of the couches.
“Where are you always disappearing to man? Even at the parties? The babes even ask where you’re at.”
Tyler said, making everyone turn to me. “I dunno, just haven’t been feeling it to be honest.”
The eyes went wide, “Niall Horan, ‘not feeling it’” Lucas said, making the room erupt into laughter. It wasn’t the kind of laughter I wanted to be involved in.
“Nah he's just chasing after that chick in Bio, with the tits.” More laughter.” I threw the pillow at Tyler, “Fuck up.” I threw back at him.
“Aw we are just kidding man.” They were all chuckling, definitely not amusing.
I sighed and focused my attention on the television, ignoring any other remarks they were planning on making, I was not in the mood.
Lissa’s POV
I got out the shower and wasn’t quite in the mood to talk about what happened with Niall, I don’t think that I would be ever in the mood to talk about that, I didn't understand him and it annoyed me, I could normally work people out but he was changing so often it was hard to keep up.
And don’t even get me started on the way he acts around different people, if you count my other personality as another person.
“I really need to get back into focus. What has gotten into me?” I said to Isabel, who was on her laptop now. “Yeah, you’re turning into a Niall Horan slut and a party addict.” It wasn’t meant as an insult but it still felt like a slap in the face. “I guess you are right, I mean, I haven’t even picked up Harry Potter in ages.” He laughed, “Please don’t.”
“Would you rather me turn on the movie?” she groaned, “No, sick of the commentary.”
“Yeah, I really need a hobby, but I think I might go home and stay there for a week, sort out my shit.”
“What about Niall?” I looked at her, she was still looking at her screen but looked at me when I didn't answer her question, “What about him?”
The subject always turned to him now, it was annoying but my life seemed to work on a schedule of him now.
“What about parties and shit?” I sighed, “I’m sure his dick can wait.” She laughed, “So have you two actually had sex yet?” I shook my head, “I won’t let him, I pulled the period card, and I'm running out of ideas.”
“Shit. Well we best get working on cracking him down.” I laughed, “Yeah well you never know what's going to happen, but hey maybe I will get to ride the Horan train and see what all the fuss is about.” She scoffed, “If you want AIDS.” I shrugged, “He's not that bad when he wants to be.”
“You’re turning into one of those obsessed girls.” I threw a pillow at her, “No I am not, I never will, he's just started being nice to me, and by me I mean me-me not Jacinta-me.”
“Well aren’t you just a lucky duck.”
“No, I don’t know, I cant work him out. Its frustrating me.”
A/N: if you didnt read the authors not up the top, you should probably read it.