"ANNIE!"
Oh dear, someone was screaming.
"What," Annie stated as she turned around to see Armin run up to her. He stopped right in front of her and hunched over, catching his breath.
"Just give... Me a.... Quick.... Second..." Armin panted. "Phew! Sorry I walked up and entire flight of stairs."
"Okay," Annie raised an eyebrow.
"So since its your birthday," Armin breathed heavily, "We got you what you wanted most!"
Annie's eyes shimmered with excitement. "You got me various ninja weapons?"
"Yep!" Armin smiled brightly. "But then Jean dropped it in the river so we had to settle for the next best thing. Your own mariachi band!"
Annie saw Reiner, Jean, and Eren shuffle into the scene with a trumpet, a maracas, and a guitar. They played a series of sounds which Annie assumed was supposed to be music. Unfortunately, it was hard to tell whether or not they were playing real notes.
"First of all, how is a mariachi band anything like a cool set of ninja weapons?" Annie asked.
"It's the next best option we had," Armin winced.
"It was my idea!" Reiner interjected.
"Like I care," Annie stated. "And Jean dropped the set into the river?" Annie rubbed her forehead.
"Yeah, I don't know how that happened," Armin admitted. "But now you have a mariachi band to follow you around."
Annie crossed her arms as she glanced at the idiots in the typical mariachi outfits. "And I want that because..."
"I don't know," Armin shrugged.
"You're welcome!" Reiner shouted.
"I said, shut the fuck up!" Annie bellowed.
Eren strummed a minor chord on his guitar.
"Why?" Annie asked.
"To symbolize anger!" Eren replied.
"You're stupid," Jean sneered.
"No you're stupid!"
"I'm not the one with a peanut for a brain!" Jean scolded as he whacked Eren's head with a maraca.
"I have a trumpet!" Reiner exclaimed.
"This is more like a punishment!" Annie groaned. "A gift card would have been nice!"
"I refuse to give gift cards for birthdays," Armin stated proudly as he placed both his hands on his hips.
"Well gee, thanks," Annie spat bitterly.
"I would also like to mention at least us guys actually went through the effort of putting together a present for you unlike the girls," Armin gloated.
"Where's Marco, Connie, and Bertolt, then?" Annie asked.
"They're the backup dancers," Armin pointed behind Annie. As she turned around she was nearly blinded by the sight of Bertolt, Marco, and Connie in tights and tutus, looking as uncomfortable as ever.
"I wanted to wear tights and a tutu but noooo!" Reiner complained. "I was the only one who knew how to play a trumpet-"
"NO ONE CARES, BRAUN," Armin and Annie shouted in unison.
"This is violating the dress code on an entirely different level," Annie uttered to herself while rubbing her forehead. "So why aren't the girls helping?"
"Because they thought the mariachi band was 'stupid' and 'a waste of time and oxygen,'" Armin mocked while stressing words with the quotation fingers.
"That's because it is stupid!" Annie shouted. At that moment, the mariachi played an "angry" tune while the ballet dancers hopped across the scenery doing jumps while trying to look graceful. What was more interesting was that Connie was somehow able to do a perfect pirouette, balancing delicately on the tip of his ballet shoes.
"Damn, Connie," Annie stated.
"Back at it again with the white vans," Eren said in the most annoying voice Annie has ever heard.
Armin immediately turned around and gave Eren an intense death stare. "I will have you beheaded for being a meme-loving piece of-"
"What? I don't take ballet lessons!" Connie laughed nervously. "Why would you accuse me of that?"
Annie face palmed. "Literally no one accused you of-"
The mariachi band interrupted her with a mess of sounds that nearly ruptured her eardrums. The atrocious dancing started up again. It was at that very moment that Annie wished desperately for a meteor to strike the school.
"Hey Annie!" She heard a cheerful voice as the awful music and dancing continued behind her.
She turned to Sasha, Mikasa, Ymir, and Christa walk up to her with a rather large box wrapped in red. However, the girls stopped in their tracks once they saw a montage of high school boys dressed in mariachi suits or tights and tutus.
"You see that too, right?" Ymir asked.
"Unfortunately," Mikasa stated.
"Damn Connie," Sasha said. "You can pirouette-"
Reiner put down his trumpet for a moment to shout, "BACK AT IT AGAIN WITH THE WHITE-"
"I swear on Bertolt's life," Christa bellowed at maximum volume. "I will murder you if you ever complete that sentence, and I will consume your blood and they will never find your body!"
"Ignore them," Annie said. "They're being stupid."
"I DON'T TAKE BALLET!" Connie shouted while on his tip toes.
"Anyways," Sasha stated. "Just wanted to say, Happy birthday!"
"Happy birthday!" The girls exclaimed while handing Annie a box.
"The wrapping paper is red like the color of the blood from thy enemies," Mikasa added.
"Nice touch," Annie commented as she awkwardly unwrapped the large box. When she tore the paper from the top, she saw that they had gotten her a set of ninja weapons. Her eyes grew wide with excitement.
"You retrieved the weapons from the river?" She asked.
"Oh, no," Christa laughed. "Those are long gone."
"We got you another one because we found the mariachi band idea stupid," Ymir stated.
"And it matches my set," Mikasa said. "We twin."
"Thanks, guys," Annie said as she opened the box. "Now, each person pick your weapon."
Meanwhile, the confusing noise was still playing on behind them. It was a mix of loud trumpet runs, Jean and Eren arguing, "I DON'T TAKE BALLET", the sound of grown men face planting from doing ballet, and Armin's voice cutting through it all, firing gruesome death threats at various people. Needless to say, it was a mess.
"ALRIGHT, MOTHERFUCKERS. WHO'S READY TO DIE?" Annie bellowed as she held nunchucks out in front of her. Behind her, Christa, Ymir, and Sasha pulled out their choice of ninja weapons as well.
Immediately, the noise stopped as the boys began to tremble in fear.
"Y-you're not gonna let her do that, right Mikasa?" Eren stuttered.
At that moment, Mikasa took out her katana. "Punishment for stupidity spares no man," she stated.
The next thing everyone knew, the halls were filled with the sound of battle cries and cries for mercy.
"Do you hear that?" Levi asked Erwin as the hoard of teenagers ran across them in a frenzy. "It's the wonderful sound of human suffering."
"You concern me, Levi," Erwin sighed.
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AN: LETS PLAY A GAME! (It's PG-13 ish so shield your eyes children)
You're writing a smutty fanfiction of your otp and the nearest object to your right is a kink. What is your kink?
My OTP has a music stand kink.
On a totally related note, happy birthday Annie!!!!