Melissa
"When my parents gave me permission to date, I instantly thought about you. I wanted you to be my girlfriend."
I look at him, learning something new.
"Girls were trying to get with me, since the day we stepped into that school. I got caught up in all the hype with sex, and I knew you weren't ready. You're a good girl. I often thought I wasn't good enough for you, because my past relationships were pretty bad."
Jason eyes meet mine, and I just stare at him in disbelief. He felt he wasn't good enough for me?
Jason doesn't take his eyes off me. "Then, I realized that I have had one good relationship through all the drama. You."
Me? I stare at him speechless.
*****
I pull into the parking space at the beach and quickly jump out the car. The whole time I'm praying to myself that nothing goes down. I don't know why Cameron feels the need to fight my battles. I can fight my own battles. I don't need a man doing that for me. The moment that I step out the car, I catch Kerri a few cars away, slamming the car door shut.
I run up to the car, trying to catch her. "Kerri!"
She whips around at the sound of my voice, and I notice immediately how she keeps her left arm behind her back. I point to her arm with an eyebrow raised.
"I have to get back to the beach. Now. And you need to bring your pretty, trouble starting ass with me."
"What is that behind your back?" I try to grab her arm, but she doesn't budge.
"Calm down. Terrance asked me to . . . " She stops in mid sentence, shaking her head. "What happened that you thought it was okay for you to send Cameron up here? I mean, with his family and shit?"
My eyes widen at her mentioning his family. "I . . . I . . . didn't. I didn't . . . send . . . send anyone." I stumble over my words.
"It was just a fucking argument between you and him! You guys always argue and then get back right. You shouldn't need me to fix your shit with him all the fucking time. I don't get paid for it."
I just look at her, wondering what the hell is she talking about. Nobody asked her to get us back together. In fact, I'm growing content that Jason and I might get divorced. It took a little time, but I'm realizing that Cameron is the guy that I'm going to end up with.
Kerri gives a deep sigh. "And then y'all ignorant asses brought the shit to my party. Yeah, he was foul for bringing that twig to my party, but you're wrong too."
"How?" I wasn't going to say too much about the situation, because it's over. I just need to understand how I am guilty of anything. The only thing I'm guilty of is loving Jason and trying to move on and repair my broken heart.
"Cameron!" Kerri shouts as though this should be an obvious answer. "You moved in with him way too fucking soon. You didn't think of anyone, but yourself!"
What? "I thought about my baby!" I scream back at her. "What the fuck type of world do you and Jason live in? I am having a baby! I'll be damned if I do this shit alone, because he has shit for brains!"
"Would it have killed you to actually wait for him? You know he loves you. I told you that!"
I cross my arms and roll my eyes. She told me a lot of shit, but obviously she was also always covering for him. I hope she didn't think that I forgot about that. I forgave her, because I love her like a sister, but I definitely didn't forget.
"You told me a lot of shit. You told me that he wasn't cheating." I shake my head, getting aggravated by this whole conversation. I came up here to save my man from doing something stupid, and instead I'm arguing with my best friend. "Let's not do this right now."
Kerri presses her lips together and looks away from me. She turns back to me and gives a little nod. "Regardless of what you think about me and everything . . . I'm all for you AND Jason." She emphasizes the word and. "I don't pick sides. I love you both equally. This is the truth. I think you two need to sit down and communicate. He loves you . . . He's just a dumb ass. You love him . . . And you are too."
Usually when someone wants you to listen to them, they do not call you a dumb ass. Only Kerri. "I'm with Cameron."
"If you were happy, I could respect that. Boo, you're not happy. You miss him also. I told you last year there's nothing wrong with taking a man back that's done you wrong. Seriously."
I look down at my feet, remembering the very first time that I felt betrayed by Jason. It was when I caught him kissing Leslie weeks after I gave him my virginity. I slowly bring my gaze back to Kerri's and give a small head shake.
"He hurt me."
"You hurt him. This relationship isn't easy, but you and him are married. You guys are expecting a child."
"It might be his." I whisper, looking down at my stomach. "It could be Cameron's." Tears come to my eyes. "And if we do get back together, and it's not his . . . Then what? He's going to be like this?"
"You turned him into this."
I hate how she is defending him. This can't be true. I turned him into the person that he is right now? I guess it does make sense, because Jason has never been the type to be so disrespectful and vile. He's never been the type to see my tears and keep a smirk on his face that shows victory. He's mean and doesn't care about his actions or words.
I lean against Terrance's car, thinking about the conversation that Kerri and I are having. Kerri backs up from the car with her arm still behind her back.
She looks pass me and then quickly turns her attention back to me. "Boo, we all make mistakes. I just don't want you guys to be like this. This is horrible for all of us. Terrance, Me . . . I feel like I have to make a choice. I know you and him never said it, but it's how I feel at times. I love you both, and I will never choose. When he fucks up, you know I let him know it. When you fuck up . . . I let you know it. I have no favorites."
I wipe a tear, slipping from the corner of my eyes, nodding. "I know. I do love him, but - - - " I stop talking the moment that I hear the gun shots. My heart drops as I turn around to look at the beach. I turn back to look at Kerri, but she is already running towards the beach.
I take off following behind her and that's when I notice that she has a gun on her also. What the fuck is going on? My mind races as I hurry onto the beach with her to see what's going on. I swear my mind feels blank as I try to keep up with Kerri, who is whipping through the crowd as she heads toward the water. People are running in all directions and screaming.
Cameron mentioned that he might needed to be bailed out, but did he bring a gun? I mean, most people say that they need to be bailed out, because they are really pissed. How many times do you actually take the person serious? Yeah, I brought a duffle bag full of cash, but never did I think that I would have to actually bail him out.
Kerri's blood curdling scream makes me stop dead in my tracks. Everyone is still running in different directions, but just as clear as day, I see Jason's body laying in the sand with a pool of blood surrounding him.
Tears fall from my cheeks without warning. I feel weak as I fall down to my knees, unable to walk any further. I let out a scream similar to Kerri's. Oh, this can't be . . .
*****
I sit in the waiting room with Kerri, Terrance, Jason's parents, my mom, Leslie, Charles, Ashlee, and Jasmine. I rest my head on Kerri's shoulder with my eyes closed reliving the last few hours. I haven't stopped crying, since the incident. I haven't seen Cameron, or any of his family. I haven't even tried contacting him. I'm so afraid that he is the one who did this to Jason.
The last time the doctor spoke to us was a couple hours ago, when they said that he was in a coma and lost entirely too much blood. He was shot twice in the chest right underneath his heart. They don't know if he will be able to pull through. And if he does, who knows what damages are done mentally and physically?
Evelyn sits by herself in the corner, saying silent prayers for her son. Nicholas haven't stopped pacing, since they got here. My mom sits next to me, trying to comfort me. I don't need comfort. I need Jason. I need to know that he's okay.
Kerri gives my hand a light squeeze, and I give a sad smile. This so reminds me of Jason always trying to squeeze my hand to let me know things are going to be okay. We knew no matter what that we always had each other. Fuck them. He said this pertaining to my mom and his parents. This was when we were in love.
*****
I listen to the love songs playing on the radio. All these songs make me think of my relationship with Jason. I think about where we had started and how we're ending it in another day, or so. I know I'm young, but I know how it is to be in love. He makes me feel a certain type of way that I can't attempt to describe. I just love him with everything inside of me.
Jason glances at me and gives me a wink. I wink right back at him.
"I love you, Jay."
"I know. I love you more." He sticks his tongue out at me.
He is usually the person that says it first. Maybe he does love me more. Only time will tell.
My phone vibrates on my leg, and I pick it up to see that it's my brother calling. I sigh and set the phone down. I've been ignoring everyone's phone calls. No one didn't want to listen, when we tried to tell them that we were in love. Now I got the whole city blowing my phone up every three seconds. His father had sent me about a dozen text messages, telling me to have Jason call him. Jason isn't trying to talk to his father.
My mom hasn't called me in the last two hours, but she had sent me a few messages in that time frame. I know that her heart is probably breaking with each message that she sends to my phone. That's probably why my brother's been blowing my phone up in the last four hours.
My phone vibrates with a message from Charles. Charles rarely sends messages to me. I open the message quickly to see what he has to say.
Call me now. Im not around momma. I just want to talk to you. Brother to sister.
I put my phone back down on my leg, thinking about his message. I know that he's going to try to talk me out of my decision and for me to just go back home, but I'm tired of doing what everyone wants me to do.
I turn the music down and pick my phone up again. I quickly dial Charles' number. I swear if he puts me on speakerphone, I'm hanging the damn phone up. I swear that if he's around Jason's parents, or my mother, he's getting the dial tone. I'm not going for any negativity. Jason and I are getting married in a couple days, and I'm not trying to get any negative vibes. They can all kiss my ass, if they aren't on board. Like Jason had said, Team Jay and Mel.
Jason looks at me nervously as my heart races, waiting for Charles to pick up. I'm half hoping that he doesn't pick up, so then I can text him back telling him that I did try to call him. Jason doesn't say anything as he continues to drive.
"Mel, what is going on with you and Jason? Are you good?" Charles sounds so concern. I half expected for him to yell at me.
"We're good."
"Where are you two right now?"
"Why? You plan on sending them? It's too late, Charles. We're already in Nevada. On Monday morning, we're getting our marriage license and we're going to get married on Tuesday."
"I hear you. I do." He takes a deep sigh. "Momma had been crying since reading your letter. No bullshit. She thinks that you're not coming home."
My eyes filled with tears at him mentioning our mother. I look out the window. "I'm coming back." My voice cracks a little. I don't ever mean to hurt my mom. I just don't want to be without Jason.
"Mel, I get it. You and Jason aren't playing games. You two want to be together. They get it now. Everyone just wants you two to take a couple steps back and come home. I mean, after graduation you guys can get married. Don't elope. Hell, I wanted to walk you down the aisle one day."
I shake my head sadly. "No one understands. His father wants him to do the right thing by Leslie. He . . ." My tears roll down my cheeks. "Momma doesn't think he loves me. Everyone thinks that this is just some random highschool relationship. We're always trying to defend our relationship." I wipe my tears. "Momma doesn't even see how good he is to me. You too. No one pays attention to how good we are together. How he makes me smile."
"We're sorry." Charles voice is low. "I'm sorry. Let's compromise right now. Listen, I've talked to his parents earlier today. They will give him all his things back and his father will get off his back. Momma will get off your back too. You guys just come home. You can come with a marriage license, but just don't get married."
I glance at Jason. He is just focused on the road. "I don't know."
"You're breaking her heart, Melly. I promise she gets it now. She'll calm all that noise down about your relationship with Jason. She just wants you to come home. She is worried about you."
"Las Vegas, baby!" Jason says with a big smile on his face as we finally make it to Las Vegas.
"We're here. It's too late." I say, before hanging up the phone. I smile fondly at Jason as he looks around.
He laughs and nods. "We're getting married, baby. I'm going to take care of you for the rest of my life."
"This will be a story to tell our kids one day."
Jason nods his head in agreement. "Tell them that their momma wanted me so bad that she made us go to Vegas."
I giggle at him with tears of happiness in my eyes. Although we had talked about his way too many times, it feels so damn real right now. I look in the backseat at Kerri sleeping on Terrance. These are the only two people I would want right here with us, sharing this moment. Kerri deserves to be here for all her hard work.
"I'm going to get us a room. I guess we can chill for the weekend and then get the paper work on Monday morning. Are you ready?" He gives me a big smile.
"Yes. You know this."
"Don't go changing your mind, baby. We've been driving day and night to get here. I don't want you to get speechless, when he asks you if you take me for your husband. You better answer the question fast. No stuttering."
I continue to giggle as Jason talks. I can hear the excitement in his voice as he talks about us getting married.
"And this is Valentine's weekend. We can lay up and make love all weekend. When Monday come, we will be well rested." He wiggles his eyebrows playfully.
"You're silly. No sex, until we get married." I giggle at how crazy I sound. I know that he's going to get some tonight. Hell, all weekend.
Jason turns to me. "I love you, baby. When I fuck up, let me know."
"I will."
Jason laughs a little. "Damn, you said that a little too fast. You could have thought about it for a little bit of time."
"We are not starting this relationship built on lies. I will tell you every single time that you fuck up. I promise."
Jason nods, taking my hand and kissing it. "That's what I want to hear, because we know I want it all, baby." I squeeze his hand gently. "Yo, Ker and Ter, we're in Vegas! Get up!"
I can't stop laughing at how excited he is to be my husband.
*****
I keep my eyes closed, deciding to say a silent prayer. Lord, I know that I have asked you for way too many things this year. And I know that I took most of those things for granted, and I do apologize. A person doesn't realize how much someone means to them, until it is tested by you. Please watch over him and guide him to be strong. Please. He has so many people that loves him . . . Including me.
I wish my last words to him weren't that I hated him. I wish I didn't say all the mean things that I said to him. Now I really see how petty we were. Life is way too short for us to argue like this. We love each other, and we didn't treat each other very well.
"Mel."
I hear Terrance's voice, but I don't open my eyes. Right now Kerri is my safe zone. I don't want to deal with any of this.
"What?" Kerri replies for me. She has always been my voice, but it was usually when I couldn't speak up for myself.
"She needs to eat. She's pregnant. We've been here for hours."
Kerri doesn't say anything.
"Look, I'm going to make a run to get some food for her. I mean, she has to eat. Jason wouldn't want her to starve herself."
This makes me open my eyes to peek up at him. He is sitting next to Kerri, looking at the side of her tear stained face.
Kerri looks down at me with the saddest pair of eyes that I have ever seen. "Boo, he's right. You have to eat. Something."
"I'm not leaving."
"You don't have to." Terrance says, gently. "I'll make a run. I'll be back."
He stands up and kisses Kerri on the cheek. He starts to walk off, but Kerri grabs his shirt from behind. He turns around to look in her eyes.
"Don't be stupid. Please. Get the food and come back."
Terrance looks away for a second without responding. He looks back at her, and I can tell that he's fighting back tears hard as hell. "Not tonight. Promise." He walks away from us.
I close my eyes again, wanting to be anywhere than in an emergency room, awaiting the results of my husband. I allow myself to reminiscence on better moments that Jason and I had with one another, before the bullshit came into our relationship. Bullshit pertaining to Cameron.
*****
The moment Jason walks in with his parents, a tiny smile comes across my face. Damn him for giving me these feelings. I haven't seen him, since he dropped me off at my house this morning. I miss him so much. I shift my gaze to his father, who has his arm around Jason's mother. Them two always look so happy, when they are together. You would think that they will understand more of what Jason and I feel for one another. Jason's father known his mother for only seven months, before they got married. Their still happily married eighteen years later.
Jason walks up to the table, smiling at us. He gives me a tiny kiss on the cheek. "Hey, baby." He looks at my mom a little nervous as he takes a seat next to me. "Hey, momma."
I breathe a sigh of relief that he calls her momma. It must means that he's willing to let go of how she's been treating him.
"What's up, Charles?" Jason greets my brother.
His parents walk up to the table and gives my mom and brother hugs. Jason's mom gives me a big hug and a kiss on the cheek. Jason's father gives me a tiny hug and pulls out her chair for her. She gives him a little smile as she takes a seat.
Everybody is now sitting down, going over the menu. I can feel Jason tapping his foot. I put my hand on his leg and squeeze gently. I didn't know that he will be nervous about this. He's the one who suggested this. He puts his hand on top of mine and gives me a tiny smile. I look away from him blushing. I catch his mom looking at us and try to focus on what I'm ordering.
"How was the trip Evelyn and Nicholas?" My mom asks his parents.
"It was great!" Evelyn responds with enthusiasm. "I wish the kids were with us. They would have had so much fun."
"We had fun." Jason says as he holds the menu up more to cover the big smile on his face.
I hold my menu up, shaking my head as I blush at his words. Damn this boy. He peeks at me, and I mouth the words stop it. He mouths back that he loves me. I turn from him just as the waiter walks up to us ready to take our order.
We all put our orders in with him. He collects all the menus, and he walks away from the table. I feel all eyes on us as I stare at the table. I sneak a look at Jason, and he is looking at me.
Nicholas clears his throat, looking at my brother. "How's school going, Charles?"
"Great. I'm at the top of my class right now. It's good." He takes a sip of water. I can see that he doesn't like the attention being on him. Who can blame him?
"That's great." Jason's father is always so laid back.
"No girlfriend?" Evelyn quizzes him.
"I don't have time for a girlfriend, Ms. Evelyn. With keeping my grades up and trying to look for a job, I just don't have the time to give to a girl right now."
Jason and I shoot a look at Charles for his response. He could have said anything, but that.
"I agree that it's difficult at times. Girls can be a distraction." Evelyn says, looking at Jason.
"Evelyn." Nicholas looks at his wife and shakes his head.
"Well, I agree with her too, Nick." My mom puts her two cents in that no one asked for. "I just want to say that I love your son. He has always been very respectful, when coming over my house. At times I think Melissa gets so sidetracked with him."
I hate how she just acts as though she's not sitting right next to me. Jason squeezes my hand under the table.
"Same here. We love Melissa. She's a wonderful girl, student, and respectful as well, but we feel as though they may be too young to be so into each other." Evelyn says back.
I refrain from rolling my eyes.
"Sweethart, they are only a couple years younger than us, when we fell in love." Nicholas says, defending us. This is why Jason gets away with almost anything.
"They'retoo young." Evelyn says back, clearly annoyed that he said anything, but what she wants to hear.
"I didn't know that I had to be a certain age to be in love." Jason speaks up. "I didn't get us all together to talk about rather we're too young or not, because we're still going to be together. I love her like crazy, and she loves me back. I just need you people to understand that we're still going to go to school after graduation, she's on birth control, and we're going to try to be long distance. You can accept it, because it will make our relationship a little easier, or you can just state how you can not support us, but that will make it harder for us." He looks at me. "Either way, we will be together."
"I love you too." I can just tongue him down right now. Instead, I hold his hand under the table and look at everyone's reaction.
His father gives a tiny nod and smile. The waiter brings our food to the table and sets the plates in front of each person. I can't stop smiling as I pick at the food on my plate.
*****
It's after dinner and we're all standing outside in front of the building. Jason gives me a peck on the lips, and I push him away gently. I do not feel comfortable kissing him in front of his parents and my mother.
"Baby, stop."
Jason pulls me into his arms as my mother and his mother talk with one another. I giggle as he gives me another peck on the lips.
"Stop what?" He gives me another peck.
I close my eyes as he kisses my lips again. He moves his arms to around my waist and continues to give me tiny pecks. The pecks turn into full blown kissing. Jason pulls back and presses his forehead against mine.
"You love me, Mel?"
"Always and forever."
"You trust me with your heart?"
I give a little smile that he is still bringing this up. "Yes."
He gives me a kiss on the forehead. "You better."
"Jason." We turn around to Evelyn's voice. "Babe, it's time to go. Your father went to get the car."
Jason takes my hand as we walk over to rejoin my mom, his mom, and my brother.
Evelyn gives me a tight hug and smiles at me. "I'll see you at dinner Monday, right?"
I nod, looking nervously at Jason. He has a big goofy grin on his face. "Of course. Like always."
She gives my mom and brother hugs and gives me one last smile. Jason hugs my mom and brother and then gives me a kiss on the cheek.
"I'll pick you up around seven in the morning."
"Okay."
Jason pulls me into his arms and kisses my forehead. I playfully push him away with a big grin on my face.
"Let's go, boy." Evelyn grabs her son by his collar.
"I love you more!"
I blush as he blows kisses at me. "I love you more."
"I said it first." He sticks his tongue out at me. I laugh as I think about his text message this morning. I make a mental note that next time I will say it first.
I keep my eyes on him, until he turns around to get into the car. His father had just pulled up. Jason's father jumps out the car and opens the door for his mother. I smile to myself thinking this could be us fast forward eighteen years.
*****
"The doctor, Mel." Kerri's voice is extremely low. I don't think Kerri has ever been so quiet in her entire life.
I open my eyes just as Evelyn reaches the doctor. She looks horrible. It's to be expected, because Jason is her only child. She has always baby him in a strict momma's boy sort of way.
"I'm sorry, but he is still unresponsive. We want to begin prepping him for surgery, because it's critical that we get the bullet out to see if any major organs were damaged."
I squeeze my eyelids shut again, hearing his words. Kerri squeezes my hand, tightly.
"He's going to pull through, baby." She tries to comfort me, but I don't think she believes her own words.
"Do what you have to do, doctor. Please." I hear Nicholas' voice.
"Of course, sir. We will do everything possible to ensure a recovery." The doctor replies back.
"Oh, my baby . . . Nicho - - -"
I open my eyes just in time to see Evelyn fall into Nicholas' arms. He wraps his arms around his wife and hold her closely, whispering in her ear.