Date: 22nd February, 2016.
"No wonder you are all sad.
They've stolen your childhood and
replaced it with homework and grades.
They don't let you dream any more,
they crush it with the
pressures to be average, yet pretend
they want greatness from you.
That is wrong.
That is so wrong."
ALASKA'S POV
I shot up when my phone started blaring my ringtone.
It was 3:05am. Instantly, I was alert, more awake then I was a minute ago.
I shook off all the haziness and sat up. I picked up my phone and pressed the accept button.
"Al?" Liam's voice resonated on the phone.
"Yeah?" I asked him. His voice sounded different. Sad, broken even.
"She's gone." He said and lost it after that. He broke down crying on the phone and I cried along with him.
"Where are you?" I asked him.
"The hospital." It seemed as if he couldn't say more than two words at once.
"Hold on, love. I'm on my way, okay?" I reassured him and he just hummed back in response.
I quickly got out of my bed and quickly put on a hoodie over my black tank top. I jogged in the kitchen and quickly scribbled a note to my parents, informing them about my whereabouts.
I picked up my mom's car keys from the bowl that was kept at the entrance and rushed out, locking he house's door behind me.
I got behind the wheel and took a deep breath. I hadn't driven in a while, and I was so nervous.
"She's gone" Liam's voice played in my head like a broken record.
In no time, tears starting falling down my face too. I rapidly wiped my eyes and tried my best to focus on the road, not that there was any traffic. After a while, I reached the hospital and hurriedly entered the hospital, locking the car behind me.
I took the elevator and brisk walked towards the room Liam's mom was kept in. There he was, slid down against a wall with his knees pulled upto his chest and his head on them.
I walked towards him and crouched down. I tapped his shoulder and looked up.
That was the worst I had seen him. Physically. Well, at least after his father passed away. His cheeks were all puffy and his eyes, red. His button up was wrinkled and his hair was sticking out in all directions, as if he had been running his hands through them.
He looked so lost, so alone. It was the most heart breaking expression I had ever seen on his face. After a second, he realised it was me and a tear leaked out of his cheek, letting his vulnerability show.
I pulled him up on his feet, him drowsy fly standing up. Ha! Who was I kidding? I tried pulling him upto his feet but in turn, I fell down.
I sighed and sat down besides him. I intertwined our fingers together and ran my thumb on his knuckles. I was bad with words, so all I could do was show and tell.
There we were, two teenagers sitting against a wall, at four in the morning with swollen, red eyes and tears running down our faces.
It was sad, I tell you.
After a while, I stood up, him copying my actions and hugged him, tight. He wrapped me in his huge, famous warm bear hug and he hid his face in the crook of my neck.
He sobbed, I sobbed. We cried for the loss of such a nice human. The angel that this earth had lost.
It was around six in the morning when Liam and I got back to my place. I let him use the guest bedroom's shower and lent him Blaze's t-shirt which I had took out from my closet drawer.
Emotionless, he got ready and we had breakfast in this, I don't know how to describe it, heavy sort of silence?
No, it wasn't Liam who was in front of me, it was some robot of some sort. Long gone was the happy, cheerful, flirty person and all that left was a person who looked worse than the dead.
Mechanically, Liam got up and I followed him. I called up Noah and told him to pick us up for school I guess, it was good to distract Liam and attend school. He did so without asking any questions.
Soon, we got to school and Liam walked away immediately, without saying a word. Soon, he got lost and we couldn't see him past the hundreds of people that crowded the hallway.
"What happened?" Noah asked me.
"It's not really my place to tell." I said with a sad smile.
"Is it his mom?" Noah asked with a worried tone.
She was family to us. I just nodded and his expression fell.
We got through the periods before lunch and this time it was I who was trying to cheer up Liam, not the other way around. No matter whatever I did, his face remained blank, void of emotions. He didn't even look at me in the eye.
It was understandable, though. She was there for him when nobody was. She was always there, the best mother anybody could ask for.
I felt so bad for him, words couldn't describe it. His dad was gone, now his mom too? What a cruel joke the universe was playing on him? It wasn't fair, Liam didn't deserve it. He didn't deserve it one bit.
At lunch, he broke the news to everyone in a monotonous tone as if it didn't really affect him but there was an underlying tone of pain in it and the table fell silent. It was like everyone, everything froze.
Nobody said, "I'm so sorry dude." or "I'm sorry for your loss." or "It will get better." Sorry wasn't going to bring her back and pity has done no good to anyone.
Instead, everyone spoke up about how beautiful, smart, charming, warm and friendly she was. We talked about her the whole lunch and honesty, I could see Liam getting better by the second.
No, not the 'Hey, everything is dandy except my mother just died' but the smiled and chuckled when we talked about the recalled the memories.
Once, all of the guys got busted for bringing in alcohol for a night out at Liam's place but instead of getting angry, Jenna joined in. We had laughed so much. That was a night I never would forget, ever.
The late bell rang and today, instead of Blaze it was Liam who waked away first. Liz rushed behind him, trying to catch up with his long strides.
None of us moved, we just sat there, not caring if we missed the next class.
"She totally likes him." I spoke up.
"No shit sherlock." Blaze rolled his eyes at me. I kicked him under the table and he winced, letting out a whimper of pain just under his breath, glaring at me. I stuck my tongue out at him.
"Don't do that." He lipsed so that nobody could hear him.
"Or what?" I smirked back, challenging him.
Before he could reply, Sean continued "But in my opinion, she's too clingy."
"And Liam's the kind of guy who needs space. He hates the clingy type." Leo jumped in the conversation.
"Plus, he isn't the kind of guy to settle down." Zack spoke up.
"I don't know what is she doing, with her chasing Li and all. I mean, it's obvious he is already fed up with her." Ashton spoke up.
"Especially, at this point in his life." Connor added in.
"Why is she after him, anyway? It is just a crush, it will go away." Blaze started, looking at me.
Everything starts off just as a crush. Ask me, I know, I wanted to reply but the reply died at my tongue and instead, I settled for, "I don't know, she hasn't even told me that she likes him."
A second or two later, Liam joined us annoyed beyond relief. "I don't understand why she wouldn't leave me alone!" He exclaimed.
"I legit hate her." He added as an afterthought.
A chorus of me too's joined in and I looked at them wide eyed. "C'mon, you guys, she's not that bad!" I defended my best friend.
Liam just rolled his eyes and gently banged his head on the table. He groaned and looked up. I looked at him. I mean, really looked at him. His eyes were a little less red now and his cheeks were back to normal, not as puffy as they were this morning. His hair was still sticking out in all directions and I ran a hand through them, settling it.
"Better" I said and he smiled a small smile in return.
"You know, we're glad we have you." Noah said.
"Yeah, we need a girl to keep us to our feet among us after all." Damien smiled.
"Thanks bro, for introducing her to us ages ago." Zack smiled a genuine smile, turning towards Blaze.
"You're welcome." Blaze smiled back and looked at me proudly and as if I was the most precious thing in the world.
I smiled back at him, feeling the heat creep up my cheeks, turning them crimson red.
"Oh shut up, you freaks." I said and we all laughed, Liam cracking a small smile, wrapping his arm around me and pulling me to his side.
A while later, the bell rang and we all proceeded to our next classes, not wanting to get into trouble. Blaze and I walked together, it was only logical as we had our next class together.
No, we still didn't talk as we used to before, but we were getting there.
~•~•~•~•~•
As I laid in bed at night, all I could think how peaceful everything was. Well, except Liam's mom had just passed away.
I don't know if I was being paranoid or not but my instincts kicked in and I know somehow that this was the calm before the storm.
I sighed and stared at the ceiling. I don't know why but the fan seemed interesting to me. I glued my eyes on the fan, not blinking, just staring, drowning in my own thoughts.
A mosquito passed by and sung in my ear. I was getting better, I thought, but for how long?
How long till the things go back to they way they were? Would they get worse? Would the nightmares start again, just as frequently? I didn't know.
I lost the trail of my thoughts an fell into the abyss of sleep with no disturbances, and thankfully, no nightmares.
The morning of the next week was like any other day. Liam picked me up and I grabbed two granola bars on my way out. I got into the car and handed him his bar. We drove to the school in silence. Today, after getting out of the car, he came with us to the cafeteria grab some breakfast (we were early) instead of running away, as he did yesterday.
After finishing his breakfast, Blaze stretch his arms above his head and smiled his infamous lazy smile which looked oh-so adorable on him.
He stretched out his legs ahead of him and looked at me. I raised an eyebrow and he winked back at me. I looked away and felt as if my whole body was on fire. A pretty silly reaction to a wink actually. It was pathetic really.
But did I care? No.
I covered my face with my hands in order to cool my cheeks, which felt as if they were on fire too.
Calma, Nov.
He flirts with every girl. You're no special.
I exhaled through my mouth, letting out a sight. Proving my though right, Blaze walked off to where a really pretty girl was, no doubt to flirt.
She was way prettier than I could ever be. Of course he's interested in her.
I heaved a sigh and Liam looked at me. He just half smiled and pulled me closer to him.
"It will be alright." He told me.
"Shouldn't I be the one saying that to you?" I chuckle and he smiles.
"We'll be alright." He mummers.
"We'll be alright." I repeat, smiling slightly.
Blaze made his way over to us and placed a piece of paper on the table. A phone number, no doubt.
"Don't you think it's too early in the morning for all this?" I asked Blaze.
"Are you jealous?" He asked smirking in a teasing way but I could detect a slight hopeful tone in his voice since I knew him so well.
"You wish." I retorted back.
"That, I do." He said and I blushed for the umpteenth time that morning.
"Hey! Stay away from my girl!" Damien exclaimed, ruffling my hair and I laughed. It felt nice to be wanted, to be loved.
Love for me, was being surrounded by these idiots who had become my family. I loved them with all my heart.
The warning bell rang and we all made our way towards another subdivisions of hell, in simpler words, our classes.
I settled besides Liz and nodded at her. She kept her face neutral and inquired, "Where were you all today morning?"
"In the cafeteria."
"Why?" She questioned again.
"Breakfast?" I told her as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
"Why didn't you call me?" She pushed on further.
"It honestly slipped my mind." I apologised. "Sorry."
"Whatever." She said and didn't talk to me for the rest of the class.
Calm before the storm, my mind said.
I sighed and just hoped nothing falls apart and it would all be okay like it should be in a normal teen's life.
________________
I'm sorry for the late update! There's just a lot going on at the moment. Thanks for all the support.
All the love,
Pia xx
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