I couldn't stop the tears from rushing down my flushed cheeks.
"Jared," I repeated, trying to catch my breath. My shaking hands flew up to my face to cover my mouth. My vision was blurred by the salty tears, but I was almost certain it was Jared.
Was it really him? He wasn't supposed to be done his tour for another few weeks! And why was he here, in London? Why wasn't he in Canada seeing our family? Or in Ireland seeing our relatives?
Jared's smile grew even bigger; as if that were possible. And it was like his smile is what snapped me back to reality. As if on instinct, I ran. I ran to his awaiting arms and threw mine around his neck.
"Hey, kiddo," Jared laughed, wrapping his strong arms around me and lifting me off the ground. He engulfed me in a tight hug; I could feel his chest vibrating as his laughter rumbled throughout his body. "Did you miss me?" he asked with a chuckle, giving me another squeeze. I clung to him like a life line, not planning on letting go anytime soon.
"Jared, you're back," I whimpered, trying to catch the breaths that the sobs stole from my lungs. "You're back. You're really back," I kept repeating, trying to convince myself more than anyone else.
"Yeah, I'm back," he confirmed, rubbing up and down my back, trying to comfort me. "I'm right here, Katie."
"Don't leave," I pleaded. "Don't leave. Please, Jared."
"I'm not going anywhere," he said surely, putting me back on the ground. I refused to let go, tightening my grip around his neck to make sure he couldn't pry me off.
"I missed you so much, Jared," I said, keeping my face tucked into the crook of his shoulder.
"I missed you too, Katie," he cooed. I could hear the grin in his voice as he spoke.
"I was so worried that you wouldn't come back," I said, finally regaining some composure.
"Well I'm here now," he laughed, pushing at my waist to try and pull me off of him. "Don't I get to take a look at you? I haven't gotten a proper look yet!"
"Not yet," I mumbled, keeping my grip on him. I hadn't seen him in over year, and I wasn't ready to let go just yet.
"Alright, then," he sighed. With a low grunt he bent down and hooked his arm under my knees, lifting me effortlessly into the air as he held me to his chest. "Boys?" He asked.
I had completely forgotten about the boys.
Lifting my face from his neck, I glanced behind me at the boys. They were all grinning from ear to ear; Niall was taking a video with his phone, as was Harry and Liam. Louis and Zayn were also holding their phones up, but it was obvious that they were taking pictures because of the way they kept readjusting the position.
"Is it okay if I put this on Twitter?" Harry asked with a huge grin as he looked at Jared and I. "It's just the happiest thing I've ever seen..."
"No problem," Jared agreed with a grin as he walked with me still in his arms. He made his way into the living room, dropping me flat on my back onto the couch as he snickered down at me.
"What the hell, Jared!" I exclaimed. I almost missed the couch when he dropped me. He just shrugged innocently, as if not knowing he did anything wrong.
Jerk.
"You've changed," Jared said with a smile, looking down at me from where he stood, "but yet, you're still the exact same."
"That makes no sense," I retorted with an unattractive snort, triggering a fit of laughter from my brother, followed by the rest of the boys that have taken their seats on the surrounding couches.
"Yes is it does," he insisted once he had calmed down enough to formulate proper words. "You're just not deep enough to understand the true double-meaning. Get on my level, Katie."
Oh, how I've missed my brother.
"Why don't you climb down from your almighty high to make that easier for me, mister I'm-the-coolest-guy-on-earth," I said sarcastically.
"Yep," he confirmed curtly. "You have definitely not changed."
"So how was Afghanistan, Jared?" Niall asked, breaking into our bickering.
"Ehh, it was okay," Jared replied with a shrug of his broad, muscular shoulders. "I mean, war's a war, what can you really say that's positive, right?"
"Yeah," Niall nodded, pushing me up by the shoulders so that there was room for him to sit beside me. "Were you on the same deployment as Austin?"
Austin was Pasiley's brother. He and Jared were just as close to each other as Paisley and I are. They were best friends since we moved to Canada, and then both of them decided that they wanted to join the Army at the same time. They're half of the reason why Paisley and I became so close; having someone you love go to war is hard, so to have someone that is going through the same thing as you by your side to support you is amazing. Austin was like an older brother to me, just like Jared was probably like an older brother to Paisley.
"Yeah, Austin and I were together the entire tour," he said with a broad smile, "he and I were in the same division, so we got dismissed at the same time. He's already headed to Canada."
"How is he doing?" I asked quickly, wanting to know if he was okay.
"He's fine, we did good," Jared replied with a proud smile. I smiled back, not being able to hide my pride.
"I'm proud of you, Jared," I smiled, the tears blurring my vision. Jared just chuckled, shaking his head a bit as he looked to the ground.
"You need to get this crying thing under control, Katie," he teased lightly. I let out a mixture of a sob and a laugh, attempting to wipe the tears from the corners of my eyes with the pads of my fingers. I felt Niall put his arm around my shoulders, pulling he into his sturdy side as he kissed the top of my head. Right then my eyes found their way to Harry, who caught them only for a second before looking out the windows instead.
I sighed.
I loved Niall; I did. But it was going to be so hard to be happy with him and love him the way he wanted me to when all I was doing was hurting Harry in return. At least, I thought that's what I was doing. Of course, he might have something completely different that he was upset about, so the only way to find out would be to simply ask him.
The only problem was I didn't really want to know the answer.
"Wow, okay so what's going on with you two then?" Jared suddenly asked with a raise of his eyebrow in question and a sly smile on his face. "Are you two engaged yet or what?" he teased, although his face seemed one-hundred percent serious.
"No, Jared, we're not engaged," I stated with a flat look. I couldn't help but feel how tense Harry seemed to be across the room. The way his shoulders were rigidly straight instead of the careful, natural slant that they were usually in. The way his jaw clenched every time Niall and I were mentioned romantically in the same sentence.
"We're going to wait a bit, until Katie get's over... Yeah, you know," Niall faded out, not wanting to mention Reece's name in front of me.
Or Jared.
"Oh yeah, about that douche bag prick-head," he started with a sneer. The boys tried to suppress their laughter, but it was to no avail. I rolled my eyes half-heartily as Jared went on. "I think I'd like to have a little chat with him, yeah?"
"Jared, I can handle this myself," I warned, not wanting him to get involved. Why did all of the guys this I couldn't take care of myself? "Don't concern yourself over this, okay?"
"I'm going to talk to him one way or another, Katie," Jared replied without hesitation. "Nobody treats my little sister like a piece of shit and doesn't pay for it."
As if on queue, my phone vibrated, letting me know I got a text. Carefully pulling my phone out of my pocket, I pressed the on button, illuminating the home screen.
One new message
I opened the message, aware that the boys had started a rather distasteful conversation about Reece, not caring that I was in the same room. Directing my eyes back to the screen, I read the text, instantly spiking my heartbeat as I read the text over and over to make sure I was seeing correctly.
Reece <3: I'm in the lobby, you ready to talk?
What?!
Me: Now?! When did we agree on now?!
The boys were oblivious to the nervous tapping of my foot on the soft rug beneath my heels.
Reece <3: I figured you wanted to get this over with, can I come up now or what?
My whole leg was now bouncing in place. I glanced at the boys from under my lashes, seeing if they could somehow detect my edginess.
Me: Stay downstairs, I'm coming down in a sec. Wait for me by the elevators.
"Who's that?" Jared questioned, shoving his head between my face and the screen. I quickly shut my phone off, shoving it back into my pocket frantically as I stood up abruptly.
"Just a- a friend," I stuttered, not wanting to make him suspicious. Suddenly I had all six pairs of eyes on me, looking doubtful as ever.
"Really...?" Louis asked questionably with a raise of his eyebrows.
"Who?" Jared asked further.
"Just a friend," I answered again, backing towards the flat doors. "I actually forgot I have a - um, a thing... with a friend," I stuttered, trying to feel my way along the apartment walls and make my way to the entrance hallway.
"Wait, where are you going?" Niall asked curiously with a worriedly glance.
"Yeah, I mean no offence Katie, but you don't really have any friends in England. You just moved here," Louis said with a quirky smile, obviously not having a filter as he spoke what was on his mind.
"I actually do happen to have friends, okay?" I replied, acting offended. I was now in the hallway entrance, ready to make my way to the doors. "I met some girls before, they go to the same Uni as me. Now if you'll excuse me," I broke off, quickly making my way upstairs to throw on some jeans and a tee shirt before jogging back downstairs and towards the doors.
"But I just got here!" I heard Jared yell from the living room.
"I'll be back soon!" I yelled, opening the doors.
"Katie, wait-" I heard Niall yell.
"Bye! I'll call you later!" I shouted before quickly shutting the door and sprinting towards the elevators.
"Shit shit shit shit," I muttered under my breath, frantically hitting the lobby button as I bounced on my feet. Why was Reece here now?! I wasn't ready! I didn't get a chance to prepare myself! What was I even supposed to say?! What is anyone supposed to say to their ex boyfriend who cheated on them?!
Better think fast, I thought as I looked up at the descending floor levels displayed above the elevator buttons.
5
"No," I whispered, horrified.
4
"No no," I spoke, louder.
3
"No no no!" I said frantically, bouncing on my heels.
2
"NO NO NO!" I almost shouted. Man, was I lucky that I was by myself in that elevator...
1
Ding
I froze, and the elevator doors opened, revealing the only person that I have ever loved and despised every fiber of his being all at the same time.
Reece.
"Shit."
*Reece's POV*
"Shit," was the first thing that came out of her mouth when her pretty green eyes made contact with mine.
"Nice to see you too, baby," I teased before I could think about what I was saying; immediately wishing I could take it back. She cringed at the old nickname, visibly wincing as if I had slapped her.
Way to already fuck things up, idiot, I thought.
"Don't," she stuttered, averting her eyes to the ground as she stepped out of the elevator. "Just don't - don't call me that."
My heart broke all over again, seeing how much pain it caused her to hear those words come from me. It was like I was talking to her like we were still together.
Like she still loved me.
"Sorry," I said in a low, apologetic voice. "I'm sorry."
"Yeah," she sighed, taking a step closer to me as she exited the elevator. "Me too."
She's sorry?! I thought with exasperation. She didn't even do anything wrong! She has done everything right, ever since we started dating. I was the fucking idiot that decided to risk the best thing in his life for something as stupid as cheating on her.
"Sorry for what?" I asked with a humorless chuckle. "You didn't do anything, Katie..."
"I'm sorry that we had to end it like... this," she replied without any emotion as she motioned to the space between us. She was trying to be tough, I knew it just by the way she spoke. She wanted to show me that she was okay; that she was already over me.
That she didn't need me.
"Katie, please-" I started, but she was quick to cut me off.
"No," she interrupted, holding up a hand in protest. She looked like she was about to cry. "Whatever happened already happened," she sighed, shaking her head. "Let's just move on, okay?"
I just nodded my head, and she sighed again.
"Let's talk about this someplace else, then," she suggested, walking past me and towards the exit doors in the back of the lobby.
"Where?" I asked, following behind closely. I just wanted to be near her again. To be able to hold her hand, or put my arm around her waist, or her shoulders. Just something; anything but this.
This was torture.
"I don't know, a cafe maybe?" she said, as if asking herself instead. I nodded, not being able to formulate a response. Just looking at her made me ache again. I missed her so much. I was such an idiot to think that a couple of one night stands with some bimbo would be worth the risk of losing her. She was perfect, everything about her. To be honest, I have no idea what she saw in me that made her agree to date me in the first place. But I still remember her exact words when she said she would. It was one of the best moments of my life.
"Will you go out with me?" I had asked nonchalantly on that autumn day right after school had ended on a Friday. I had ran to catch up to her before she could slip away. She was wearing a simple black and white flannel button up and some skinny jeans, but she still looked amazing.
"Why?" she had asked bluntly. I remember laughing, somehow finding that the best response I had ever gotten when asking a girl out. Usually they would immediately agree; I have never gotten questioned, not once. And then Katie caught my eye, and everything changed.
"I don't know, why not?" I laughed. I remember seeing her try to keep the smile that was threatening to surface off of her pink lips.
"Well, you don't know me, and I don't know you," she replied with a shrug of her shoulders.
"Oh, but I do know you, Katie," I had replied confidently. She peered up at me through her long, think eyelashes, a blush evident in her cheeks. "We have three classes together. You sit in the front of the class every period with that girl named Paisley. Even though I sit in the back of the class, I still pay attention; especially to you."
"Alright," she replied after a short period of silence.
"Alright...?" I asked, unsure of what she had meant.
"Alright," she confirmed, nodding her head as her wavy hair moved with the fall breeze. And then she started to walk away.
"Wait!" I exclaimed, jogging to catch up to her. She slowed down, looking over her shoulder. "Alright what?" I asked in confusion. She giggled, and that was the first time I had ever heard my favourite sound in the world. That little laugh that she had made, it stuck with me.
"Alright, I'll go out with you," she responded with a small smile.
"You will?!" I had answered. I remember being completely shocked that she had actually said yes to me.
"Yeah," she shrugged, as if it was nothing special. "One date," she confirmed, holding up a single finger. "Just one."
"I'll pick you up at eight, then," I said, grinning like crazy. I was so happy that she agreed to go out with me.
"How? You don't even have my number," she giggled again, and I swore that it was the best noise I have ever heard.
"You're a smart girl, Katie, you know that?" I chucked, stepping closer to her and handing her my phone so she could put her number in. And when she had finished, I remember how she looked up at me as she handed it back. Like there was some kind of new hope in her eyes. Like maybe I wasn't just trying to get her into bed like she might have thought I did with every other girl. And it was that one look that she gave me that started everything that followed. She gave me the okay to go, or the green light. Call it what you will, but in that one look, everything changed.
That's what started us.
"This is okay, right?" Katie's voice sounded from beside me, snapping me back into reality. I shook my head, trying to rid myself of the flashback.
"Uh, yeah," I said, coming to from my dazed phase. I looked up at the building we were in front of. It was a little cafe, just like Katie had said we would go to. "Yeah, this is fine."
"Okay," she replied without emotion. It killed me to see her acting like this. The Katie I knew was a sweet, happy girl that was always smiling, no matter what. She was always laughing, always signing, she was just a happy girl. But this Katie... I didn't know what to make of her. It was like she was a completely different girl. She was emotionless, and sad, and gloomy eyed. She was not the Katie I knew before.
As we made our way to a small table in the corner of the cafe, she managed to avoid all eye contact with me. She kept her eyes glued to the ground, and when she took a seat, she just stared at her knotted hands on the table.
"So..." I started, not sure how to start off the conversation. I mean, what was I supposed to say? I'm sorry I had sex with another girl while we were in a three year relationship?! Yeah, that will go well...
"Why did you come here?" she asked suddenly, finally looking up at me. "To London, to the flat, to me. Why?"
I started at her, my mouth slightly open and yet no words were coming out.
Say something, idiot!
"I just-" I started, not knowing how to respond. What was I supposed to say to that?! Katie leaned back in her chair, crossing her arms across her chest. Instinctively my eyes travelled to the v-neck line of her tee-shirt, lingering at her chest.
"My eyes are up here, Reece," she said in monotone. It snapped my eyes back to her's, somewhat ashamed that I had done it. She wasn't mine anymore. I wasn't supposed to act like she was my girlfriend, because she wasn't.
I gulped.
"I wanted you back," I confessed, averting my eyes away from her's. "I still do."
"Reece, what don't you understand-"
"I know," I cut her off before she could finish. "I know. I already know that I messed everything up. And I know that you probably hate me, and that you don't want to see me anymore. And I know that you wish I hadn't cheated and I wish I hadn't either," I rushed out, looking at her again to see her reaction. She was biting her lip, which she only did when she was thinking.
"But it was a mistake," I continued, thinking through my words carefully. I only had this one chance to try to win her back. "It was a mistake, Katie, I promise. If I could take it back, I would without even thinking twice. People make mistakes, and I'm sorry mine had to ruin what we had. It was a mistake and I wish I could take it back-"
"But that's the problem, Reece," Katie interrupted with a humourless chuckle, shaking her head as she looked straight back at me. "You can't take it back. That's the problem. You already did it. You already ruined our relationship. And you can't take it back Reece, because that's how life works. We can't erase the past, because even if I do forgive you one day, I will always know in the back of my mind that right when I thought I loved you, I truly loved you, you cheated on me," she spoke, and let me tell you, her words cut like knives. Every sentence left me feeling more horrible than the first.
"It will never be the same, because it happened, and that's it," she whispered, and I could see her eyes starting to shine with moisture. She dropped her head, looking down at her shoes.
"Katie, I'm sorry," I apologized helplessly. I'm not sure what I thought that would do, because I certainly didn't believe that would make everything better between us. I guess I just needed something acceptable to say.
"Like I said," she whispered with a sorry smile and a shake of her head.
"Me too."
I'M BAAAAAAACK!
OH MY GOODNESS I MISS YOU GUYS SO SO SOOO MUCH! Before you guys start getting upset that I didn't update sooner, just know that I'm even more upset that I didn't update sooner. I had literally no motivation to write, at all! I had such bad writers block it's absolutely insane. I actually rewrote this chapter four times, and I'm still not even close to happy with the way it turned out. This chapter was not good at allllllll but at least it's something, right? And by the way, IF YOU WERE CONFUSED ABOUT WHAT WAS HAPPENING IN THE PART WHERE REECE ASKED KATIE OUT ON A DATE, THAT WAS A FLASHBACK TO THE FIRST TIME HE HAD ASKED KATIE OUT IN HIGH SCHOOL. JUST TO CLEAR UP ANY CONFUSION. Anyways, I would just like to thank everyone who kept voting and commenting and didn't give up on this story! I love you guys so much, and you have no idea how grateful I am for all of your support! Stay safe!
~ Skylar xx
P.S. Guys, I'm really struggling with writers block, and it would be amazing if you guys could give me some ideas on what you think should happen next in "When in London". I'm running low on inspiration :( COMMENT YOUR IDEAS BELOW!
P.P.S. Do you guys think Katie should forgive Reece? Comment yes or no!