Katniss POV- (That night)
"Hey." Peeta comes into our bedroom after his shower, in his underwear and a white t-shirt.
I turn and look at him as he gives me an exaggerated grin and a sigh then glances at Willow who's sleeping soundly next to me.
"Hi." I say tiredly and turn flat on my back.
I'm still kind of upset about earlier today.
I just can't let it go, just as he had predicted.
"What's up?" He asks, sitting down on his side of the bed and turning to back to look at me.
I give him a fake smile, "I'm just here." I sigh and sit upright, he turns to me.
"You okay?"
I sigh, "I'm fine. Just been thinking. My mind has been on a roller coaster, it seems."
Peeta grins, "When is it not?" He teases me.
I manage a genuine laugh.
He's 100% right.
"I'm kidding." Peeta is quick to add.
I shake my head, "No, it's true." I start, "I'm sorry that I overthink and can't leave well enough alone."
He frowns, "Katniss, I never said that."
Actually, he has said that many times but he hasn't today so I don't argue.
"I know you didn't, I did."
He sighs, "Okay, but sometimes, you make really good points by overthinking things." Peeta says innocently, trying to show me a side that's not really brighter.
I don't say anything for a few minutes until he breaks our tensioned silence.
"How long has she been out?"
"About fifteen minutes." I shrug.
"Then we could spend a little time together. It's only 9:30." He suggests, hopeful.
I shrug my shoulders, "Peeta, I'm sorry but I'm just ready for bed. I don't want to spend any time with you other than sleeping right now. I'm sorry." I say bluntly.
His smile drops, "Come on. Give us like 30 minutes. Please?" Peeta begs me.
"For what? For us to fight again or do nothing at all?" I sigh but it'll probably happen because it usually happens about like that.
He gives me a hurt look, "To spend time with you because I love you...Actually, you know what? Let's just go to bed." Peeta says and I can tell that I've hurt his feelings.
It's not that I'm still all that upset but I am just exhausted. I just really want to go to bed before Willow wakes up in a couple of hours to eat.
I sigh deeply, trying to keep my cool.
"It's not that, Peeta. I'm just tired." I say as I feel tears burn in my eyes at his assumption that may only partly be true.
Cue the fighting.
"Then let's just go to bed, Sweetheart." He says sweetly, having a quick change in heart.
"But I don't want to go to bed with you mad at me." I look into his blue eyes and they soften at my words.
"I'm not mad. I was just hoping since we had about 30 minutes before our usual bedtime, that we could spend some time together. You're right though, using the extra thirty minutes we had for extra sleep would be smart."
I take a deep breath, I'm really not all that tired as I am tense. I'm just so worried about everything that happened today and things that happened yesterday and weeks or months ago and years ago too. My mind is just constantly running and I feel dizzy.
"No, I'm sorry. You know me and you know that I need some of your attention and that I should take it and ugh, I'm sorry I'm just crazy." I say frantically, feeling even dizzier.
He reaches over and grabs my semi-flailing arms, "Katniss, you're not crazy." Peeta tells me calmly.
I try to pull my arms away but his grip is too strong, "You're just stressed out and there is nothing wrong with that, okay? You're not crazy."
I nod my head and his tight grip on my forearms release and his large hands move into my much smaller ones.
"Look at me." Peeta mumbles.
I bring my head up but I don't want to look him in the eyes for whatever reason.
Maybe because he's going to say something that makes it all seem better, even though it won't last.
He grabs my face and forces me to look into his eyes, "Look at me." He says and my eyes move to his.
"I love you so so much." Peeta says.
My face stays expressionless, "I love you too." I mumble.
"If you need to go to bed, then I'll hold you." He says kindly.
I frown, feeling bad.
Of course he's willing to spend any amount of time he can with me, even if I'm sleeping and he's wide awake, holding me tight.
"No, Peeta. Just stop. Please?"
"I'm not doing anything, Katniss."
"Yes, you are. You're just so-ugh you're just so forgiving and caring towards me. I just wish I were like you were when it came to things like this." I frantically say, feeling so completely and utterly overwhelmed.
"Calm down, Katniss. This isn't healthy for you to be so stressed out all the time."
"I can't calm down, Peeta. I'm just ruining our marriage and both of your lives."
"Katniss, our marriage is fine. And you certainly are not ruining anyone's life. In fact, you're the reason I'm still alive and the reason Willow is too." Peeta says.
I groan.
He grabs my face somewhat aggressively and presses a kiss to my lips. It's hard, a more forced kiss but just as passionate as every one we've ever shared.
A few seconds later, he's the first to break away.
"I had to do that. At least once."
"Why?"
"To see if it was a good way to get you to shut up." Peeta laughs.
I just stare at him, wondering if I should be mad or laugh.
"You don't see yourself the way I see you and that's the most frustrating thing about being in love with you."
"What?"
He sighs, "You don't see yourself the way I see you. I would give anything for you to see yourself through my eyes." Peeta says passionately.
I start to object but he interrupts me.
I sigh.
He takes my hand and starts rubbing my thumb against his, making me smile as tears roll down my cheeks.
"And I love it when you smile. It's a rarity around here anymore." He sighs.
I frown.
"Maybe you should go to sleep."
"Why?"
"You don't scowl. Improves your looks a lot." Peeta teases me.
I shake my head at him, not even being able to contain my grin.
He wraps his arms around my waist and starts tickling me, I let out a screech.
"Peeta!" I squeal and then quickly cover my mouth, hoping I didn't wake Willow up.
He stops, "What?" He chuckles, knowing exactly what.
I lean against his chest, his arms still tightly around my waist, holding me close.
"Our sleeping baby like three feet away from us. Don't do this now."
"We could...Go downstairs and do this."
"Do what?" I laugh a little and shake my head.
He grins this childish grin, "Have a tickle fight."
I can't even contain my laughter at his comment.
"I'm serious." He says with a smile in his voice.
"If we go downstairs and I let you pin me onto the floor and tickle me then you'll be happy with me at least for tonight?" I ask.
"I'll never stop being happy with you but getting to do just that would definitely be a fun bonus." Peeta laughs a little.
I sigh, "Fine."
I haven't been all that nice to him lately and we haven't done anything too fun alone in awhile so whatever, he would do it for me.
"Well, come on." I say, unraveling his arms from around my waist and climbing off of him.
"Really?" He asks with a restoration of hope in his demeanor.
"Yes, come on and maybe we can do more than just a tickle fight." I say and pull him up off of our bed.
About half way down the hall, he startles me by scooping me up and throwing me playfully over his shoulder.
"Peeta!" I quietly squeal.
"Yeah?" He says nonchalantly.
"Nice buns." I say as I examine the only thing in my vision besides the floor.
He laughs hysterically at the pun, "Don't you even think about it..." He says about the time he makes it to the bottom of the staircase.
I grab a handful of his cute little butt and I give it a squeeze.
He nearly squeals himself as he jumps out of his skin, "I told you not to do that!" Peeta laughs but I know he enjoyed it just as much as I did.
"Well, I tell you not to do a lot of things to me but you do. Like tickling me." I say stubbornly.
"Tickling. Hm, isn't that why we are here after all?" He says, coming up behind me and putting his hands on my hips.
I get prepared for what I'm about to experience, something only Peeta is allowed to do to me. I act like I hate it but we usually have a fun time together when we do stupid things like this. But in reality, I do hate being tickled.
"Yeah." I laugh and turn myself so that my chest is pressed up against his, he touches my butt now.
I laugh as he gives it a few playful squeezes.
"Man, I really kneaded that."
I scoff, "I can't wait until you're a baker again and you make these jokes all the time again."
"I didn't realize you were so fond of my bread jokes."
"It's always been an important slice in your personality."
Peeta snorts, shaking his head and bringing his lips gently to mine, giving me another little squeeze.
"Hey now." I say.
"Hey, I think we deserve a little fun since we haven't had any pretty much since June."
That's not exactly true but June was about the time all this crap started.
"It's been fun at times but not like this."
"Yes. Agreed. Now we can do whatever we please."
"Except sex. I don't want to do that for awhile." I say truthfully.
"That's okay, for a long long while even and we will use protection every time. I know you don't want anymore kids."
"I never said that." I'm quick to say.
"Okay, but still, you don't want any more for a really long time." Peeta says.
"Something like that." I say.
"Anyways, let's be rebels and stay up a little past our bedtime and have some fun with each other that we can't do when Willow is awake."
"I have a feeling we are gonna be needing lots of 'Mommy and Daddy only' time in the future." I say truthfully.
"Well, that'll be just fine with me."
"Let's get this started. Don't hold back." I scoff.
"You act like you are looking forward to this." Peeta chuckles, slowly moving his hands to my ribs.
I start getting all eerie, knowing he's about to start tickling me.
"I'm not but I like when you tickle me. You're the only person allowed to do this, so feel special." I laugh a little.
He smirks and his fingers prod into my skin a little, "Good."
I jerk around as he starts tickling me full on and as usual. He quickly pins me to the ground, immediately conquering this battle of ours even though I always try to escape.
"You should quit cooking so much good food. It's taking a toll on us both, Peeta." I tease him as he grabs my arms and pins them over my head, sprawled across my body himself.
He gets really close to my face, "But it's so good." Peeta exaggerates.
I laugh, "It's very good but I really do think we should cut back."
"Hey, you just had a baby and I'm a sympathy eater. I think I gained more weight than you did your entire pregnancy."
"If Willow doesn't quit eating like a pig before she actually can eat real food, she's going to be 100 pounds before she's five." I exaggerate.
He laughs, "Neither one of us have a weight problem so I highly doubt it."
"We easily could."
Peeta scoffs, "No way. She probably won't be more than 100 pounds until she's a teenager, I'm sure."
I groan "Ugh, I can't even imagine her being a teenager. You should shut up and kiss me before I have to tickle you."
"I'm not ticklish."
I scoff, "You are but I've never retaliated so I wouldn't know where to begin. But I bet that I could easily beat you up." I tease him.
"You couldn't beat me up if you tried." He laughs, shaking his head.
"I could've when we were younger. Before I got pregnant maybe. I was in better shape before then but I probably could if I had to."
Peeta shakes his head, "No way. I'm never going to give you a reason to beat me up. Because I know when you're pissed off, you could probably kill me."
True.
"Probably." I tell him.
"Anyways, where were we?" He asks.
"Kiss me...please?" I whine but he shakes his head.
"Then at least get off my bladder. I'm not as sturdy as I use to be down there." I laugh a little and he scoots down a bit.
"There, now you can kiss me." I say.
"No way!" Peeta says with a childish grin on his face.
"Let me sit up then. I'm losing feeling in my arms."
He's quick to let go and get off but I really didn't lose any feeling in anything, just wanted to attack him.
I pushed him back down into the floor and started giving him a taste of his own medicine.
Little did I know, my very own Peeta Mellark is extremely ticklish too.
His laughter is the sweetest thing and his whining is slightly attractive too, "Stop!" He laughs hysterically as I prod the skin in between his collar bones, doing the same stuff he does to me.
"No, I'm not stopping until you kiss me." I say.
"I'm not kissing you." He says so I play 'Peeta' while he plays me. I continue to prod his skin while his body jerks and he tries to get me off of him but it's a little more difficult than before.
Thank you baby weight.
"Katniss!" He lets out a high pitched squeal.
"What the hell was that?" I giggle, finding this absolutely adorable and loving every second, despite the fact I was ready to kill him earlier today.
He laughs, "I don't know but you should quit tickling me."
"No! You have to kiss me, this is payback for four years!" I laugh and make kissy faces at him as he tries and wards me off him.
He smirks and hugs my waist, pulling me down so that I'm laying on top of him on this nice, comfy floor.
"Hello there." Peeta mumbles seductively and I let out a snort.
"Hi."
He laughs, "You ready for that kiss now?"
"Very much so." I say truthfully and I am the first to attack.
There's so much heat and sparks that go flying within a matter of a few seconds. My braid falls across his neck as we make out right here on the living room floor.
"Katniss, you're so amazing." Peeta says, hesitantly pulling away for some well-needed air.
"Why?" I laugh a little.
"Because you're just so special to me. Then you kiss me like that and it makes it seem like everything bad that's ever happened to us just fades away. You numb my pain."
"The same way you numb mine." I say quietly, truthfully.
Peeta is and has always been my 'numbing' tool the same way he says I am his.
There's been times when we could be absolutely furious with each other and upset and then one of us will usually come around and before we know it, it's back to normal.
Kind of like tonight.
"I think that I hear our little girl..." Peeta says, listening attentively.
I laugh and listen too.
Sure enough, Willow is definitely awake.
I can hear her begin to fuss.
I sigh and rest my forehead against Peeta's chest.
"She wants to join the fun now that Mommy and Daddy are happy again." Peeta says.
I press my lips to his, "Let's go get her before she's too cranky."
"I think we should all spend some quality time together before bed. Who cares if we stay up later?" Peeta suggests.
I bring my head up, "Let's go get her and we can watch a movie or something down here."
He smiles and I climb off of him, then help him up off the floor.
When he gets up, he pulls me into a hug and kisses the top of my head.
"I love you so much."
I smile, "I love you, Peeta." I say, then we break away and head upstairs.
We walk in and see she is wide awake.
"Hi, Willow." Peeta says, getting her attention. He reaches down and scoops her up into his arms.
I smile at the sight and lean against the doorframe.
She is so tiny, especially in Peeta's strong arms.
He's such a good dad.
"Do you want to go downstairs with Mommy and Daddy?" He asks her, holding her out face to face with him.
She looks at him expressionless.
Peeta laughs and looks back at me, "I think she wants to."
I smile genuinely at him and we head back downstairs.
"Pick out a movie, Momma." Peeta says to me in his baby voice and sits on the couch with Willow's head on his shoulder.
I find us a movie then I grab the blanket off the couch and snuggle up to Peeta's side. He puts Willow into my arms. Peeta and I sort of watch the movie together but we can't stop looking at our baby girl.
This all still seems so surreal.
It's not until nearly 11:30 that it's over and Willow is conked out. She will probably wake up soon to eat again though but I'm nearly asleep myself.
"Katniss?" Peeta says softly, looking down at me.
He probably thinks I'm asleep too.
"Are you ready for bed?"
I sleepily nod my head and look at him, letting out a yawn.
"Here. I'll get the baby and you go on up to bed. I'm gonna get a bottle from the fridge because she will probably want to eat pretty soon. Go to bed. I'll take her tonight." He says to me.
I don't even have enough energy right now to argue so I don't.
I stand up and walk upstairs. Then I crawl in between the cool sheets and I hear Peeta come in a few seconds later.
He puts Willow in her bed next to me and then kisses her goodnight and then I don't hear him for a minute.
I don't open my eyes or move, just listening.
"You have no idea the effect you have on us." Peeta whispers and I feel him press a kiss to my forehead, careful not to 'wake' me. I act as if I'm fast asleep as Peeta brushes some hair out of my eyes.
"I love you both so much." Peeta whispers and walks over, shutting the light out and climbing into bed next to me.
I feel his arms reaching around for my hands and I hope that he finds them, he does and gives me this reassuring squeeze and lays our hands on his stomach and soon, he's asleep himself.
We only wake up one time with Willow that night, getting some well needed rest.